December 9, 2014

This entry is part 14 of 34 in the The Best Thing

When the cloud in the sky starts to pour
And your life is just a storm you’re braving
Don’t tell yourself you can’t lean on someone else
Cause we all need saving sometimes

– We All Need Saving, Jon McLaughlin


Thursday, July 14, 2005

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

Elizabeth glanced at the clock on the mantel and winced. She fastened her earring as she slid her feet into her heels. “I’m going to be so late.”

Nora set Evie on the playmat behind the armchair then straightened. “I thought your meeting with your agent wasn’t for another hour.”

“Yeah…” Elizabeth crossed the room and retrieved her portfolio where she’d stowed it the night before in Jason’s office. “But I still have to pack up Cam, drop him at my grandmother’s before I can meet him at the Grille.”

Nora pursed her lips. “Ms. Webber, did I do something to annoy you?”

“What?” Elizabeth blinked. She set the portfolio on the ground. “Why?”

Nora gestured towards the mat where Cam sat, tugging toys from the basket she kept there. “He can stay with me, Ms. Webber. I’m here with Evie anyway.”

Elizabeth wrinkled her nose. “But you’re her nanny, I mean I know you watched him in New York—”

“But you’ve refused to let me since you and Mr. Morgan started dating.” Nora crossed her arms. “You’re always dropping him with your brother or grandmother. Did…did I do something wrong? I mean, if you don’t like me—”

“Nora, if I had a problem with you watching my son, why would you think I wouldn’t say anything to Jason?” Elizabeth tilted her head. “You’re fantastic with Evie. But I don’t pay you, Jason does. I don’t want you or him to think I’d take advantage of that arrangement. Cam and I…we’ve got our own thing—”

“Ms. Webber, if I could be real for a second here.” Nora held up a hand. “Mr. Morgan pays me an insane amount to hang out with Evie the few hours a day he’s not here. In fact, I’ve been praising the heavens you guys are together since he actually leaves the house at night. I mean, I barely earn the money I make, which is fine, but seriously. One more kid, who’s as awesome as Cam, is not taking advantage.” She shrugged. “Plus, you’re here so much—”

“I mean, I guess it hadn’t really occurred to me,” Elizabeth said. “I…just…I don’t know. I guess in my head, it’s one thing for Jason to hire a nanny, but…” She lifted a shoulder.

“It’s a mom thing.” Nora nodded. “You don’t work full-time like Mr. Morgan, so why would you bother with a nanny instead of baby-sitters as needed. Totally get it. We talked about this kind of stuff in my gender studies class all the time—”

At Elizabeth’s blank look, she explained. “I’m a part-time college student, that’s why I had Mondays off last semester. Anyway, it’s like this societal pressure on a mother. Gender stereotypes.”

“Um. I guess.” Elizabeth scratched her brow. “I mean I guess we could talk about it, but—”

“Let me make your life easier today by keeping Cam.” Nora shrugged. “We can work out any particulars later, but I can assure you I’m already basically overpaid.”

“Hmmm…” Elizabeth rested her hands on her hips. Nora might not realize it, but Jason overpaid her to ensure loyalty and to compensate for guards and security inconveniences.

Still, Nora was already here and Cam liked her. What could it hurt to allow the woman to watch him?

“All right.” She leaned down to brush a kiss on Cameron’s head. “Bye, baby. Be good for Nora.” She paused and then brushed a kiss to Evie’s cheek. “I’ll see you both later.”

Evie grinned at her, and held out a red truck with both her chubby hands. Elizabeth laughed and pressed the button to make the sirens wail. She giggled and then threw the truck.

“Thanks, Nora,” Elizabeth hefted the portfolio in her hand and left.

If she’d waited five minutes longer, she could have avoided the blonde woman waiting for the elevator. She turned to Milo who just shrugged and joined his brother Max who stood next to Carly.

Carly glanced at her as the doors opened. “Elizabeth,” she said stiffly. She glanced at the portfolio. “An art thing?”

The almost pleasant tone took Elizabeth aback for a minute, so she was slow to step onto the elevator. “Oh, yeah. A meeting with my agent.”

Carly nodded and folded her arms. They were both quiet as the elevator slipped from the fifteenth floor to the thirteenth. Carly cleared her throat. “So I guess things are good with Jason.”

Elizabeth glanced at her from the corner of her eyes. “They’re okay,” she drawled. “Why?”

“I mean you and your son are here all the time.” Carly shrugged. “That’s good. I mean, I want Jason to be happy.”

Remembering Jason’s suspicions, Elizabeth just nodded. “Well, we make each other happy.” Maybe she was baiting the harpy, but a pleasant Carly was a plotting Carly.

And a plotting Carly did no one any good.

“I figured.” The elevator slid to the fifth floor. Elizabeth had never wanted to see the parking garage more than anything else in her whole life. “It doesn’t bother you, about Evie, I mean?”

“What about Evie?” Elizabeth turned slightly, surprised Carly would address the situation so directly. “She’s a beautiful little girl.”

“I’m sure she is, but you know, people are talking about it all.” Carly shrugged. “But I guess if you don’t mind being known as the rebound—”

Elizabeth rolled her eyes as the door slid open and they both stepped into the parking garage. Milo stepped away to talk to the guard to bring around both cars. “Carly—”

“I mean, he was screwing that whore all of last year. They were planning a family together. It doesn’t bother you that Jason’s dumped you in her place?” She arched a brow. “He went and found himself a mother for his bastard.”

What the goddamn hell? Elizabeth stepped towards the other woman. “Are you serious? You’re coming at me because Jason and I are together more than six months after Evie’s mother died? What about you? How fast did you spin between Tony, Jason, AJ, and Sonny?” She narrowed her eyes. “And we can’t forget Lorenzo Alcazar.”

“I’m saying,” Carly said, her teeth clenched. “I’m surprised you don’t resent being a replacement for Jason’s whore. You know she screwed Sonny, Jason and Jax in about a five minute span—”

“That would be Sam’s business, not mine.” Elizabeth tossed her hair over her shoulder. “You know, Carly, for someone who says they want Jason to be happy, you sure spend a lot of time attacking Jason’s choices.” Lowering her voice, she continued, “Maybe this is a concept you don’t understand but Evie is not Sam, and to paint the daughter with the alleged sins of her mother is so goddamn reprehensible, I can’t even begin to see why Jason bothers with you.”

“Please, little Miss Mary Sunshine. I live in the real world.” Carly stepped towards her. “I know what Jason has done for me in my life. I am well-aware of the fact that everything I have — my marriage and my boys — is because Jason made that happen. He has protected me for years. You think I’m not grateful?”

“You’ve got a funny way of showing it,” Elizabeth snapped. “Attacking me, attacking Sam, attacking Evie…what the hell is wrong with you, Carly? You’ve got your precious marriage, your penthouse, your club, and your gorgeous boys. Why the hell are you so unhappy?”

Carly laughed then, a bitter and nearly twisted sound. “Please. Don’t throw stones at a glass house, honey. You and I both know what’s making me miserable.”

Her car drew up then. “I hate the way Jason and Sonny are around each other now,” Carly said. “You know how close they were once. How much Jason depended on Sonny, loved him, looked up to him.”

“I do.”

“That’s all gone now.” Carly pursed her lips. “Maybe it’s gone because Jason…” She paused. “Because Jason took Sam away under Sonny’s nose, but we all know when it started. We all know who’s to blame for this.”

Elizabeth drew her brows together. “Carly—”

“You think because I’m a narcissistic, self-absorbed bitch I can’t see what’s right in front of my face?” Carly demanded. She stalked to the car, where an impassive Max stood with the door open. “I started it. The night I slept with Sonny. When I let Sonny adopt Michael. I’d even bet money that Jason went after Sam to get her away from Sonny, so I wouldn’t destroy him in court over the boys.” She shook her head. “Nothing I’ve tried so far has fixed it. I don’t even know if I can. So here’s my piece of advice to you, Sunshine.”

Elizabeth pressed her lips together and remained silent, because Carly’s behavior was more troubling than she’d expected.

“Make Jason as happy as you can for as long as you can. He deserves it after the bullshit Sonny and I have put him through.” She stopped. “Will continue to put him through. He’s too good for both of us, and you know we’ll destroy him sooner or later. Make him see that. Because the only one who can make this stop now is Jason.”

Carly stopped and closed her eyes. “God, I really am a selfish bitch.”

And with that, she slid into the car and Max closed the door. His dark eyes met Elizabeth’s. “You all right, Miss Webber?”

“No,” Elizabeth admitted. “I never know what to think about Carly.”

“Join the club,” the older guard murmured as he slid into the passenger seat.

After Carly’s car had driven out of the garage, her car drew in front of the guard’s station. Milo hurried forward to open the door for her. “Miss Webber?”

She sighed and handed him her portfolio to place in the trunk. “Is this what if feels like when someone declares war?”

“I wouldn’t…know, Miss Webber.” Uncomfortable now, the young man shifted. “But I bet it’s not far off.”

General Hospital: Cafeteria

“Would you mind if I took a seat?”

Audrey glanced up and smiled warmly at her old friend. “Of course, Monica. Join me.” Monica set down her lunch tray as Audrey moved a set of charts to the side. “How are you?”

“Good.” Monica tore open a sugar packet and dumped the contents into her Styrofoam cup. “And…you? Your family?”

Audrey smiled, and took pity on Monica because she knew exactly what the point of this little meeting was. “Elizabeth and Cam are doing quite well.”

Monica’s cheeks were stained with red as the younger woman looked away. “I shouldn’t…but since Lila died last year, I’ve been so concerned for Jason. I’ve hoped he would find some sort of happiness, and…I’ve seen them around.” She held up a hand. “Not that I’ve been looking, but they’re at Kelly’s sometimes or…”

“It’s perfectly fine.” Audrey sipped her tea. “There isn’t much detail I can offer, to be honest. Elizabeth plays her cards quite close to her chest. I suppose that’s due to the last few years.” She tapped her fingernails against the porcelain mug in her hands. “I wasn’t always as supportive as I could have been.”

“Do you know how long they’ve been seeing each other?” Monica asked.

“I’d say seriously since Emily’s wedding.” Audrey smiled. “Your daughter is quite the Quartermaine, engineering that bouquet and garter nonsense. But they’ve been…” She pursed her lips. “I know Emily would call it circling one another for months. Meeting for talks, I’ve watched Cam a few times while she’s gone on that motorcycle.”

“What would you call it?” Monica asked.

“Finding one another again.” Audrey leaned back in the uncomfortable hospital chair, her mug in one hand, her other arm across her waist. “Learning who one another is after all this time. They were both…gun shy, I would say.”

“Hard not to be after what they’ve been through. Bad marriages, in particular.” Monica sipped her coffee. “I always liked Elizabeth, you know. I remember the first time I became aware…that there was something there. Something more than just Emily’s brother and her friend.” She tilted her head. “It was the summer he came home, and Elizabeth was in trouble. Jason allowed Edward to blackmail him in order to get help.”

“Well, I knew they were friends. After Lucky died, I was concerned about that.” Audrey glanced down at her cup, feeling that sick sense of shame spreading through her. “I judged her harshly. Him as well. I didn’t see what he could possibly bring to her life after all the loss and hurt she’d suffered. I couldn’t see how he had already helped her. The sparkle was back. The rebellious side that had been all but lost after her…”

“Her rape,” Monica murmured. “I…remember her outcry at Tom Baker’s trial.”

Audrey nodded. “She curled up inside herself for months, only letting Lucky in. Occasionally myself and her sister, but only Lucky really broke through that tough exterior. Then, she lost him and I truly thought I would never see my granddaughter shine again.” She closed her eyes and bit her lip. “Until I saw her getting off your son’s motorcycle that fall.” Opening her eyes, Audrey looked at Monica. “I encouraged her this time to take a chance if it was there to be taken.”

“I’m glad. Because we both know the road ahead for my son is…not so easy.” Monica glanced across the cafeteria where Bobbie was laughing with Amy Vining. “This…business with Evie is going to come to a head.”

“Sooner rather than later, I should think.” Audrey pursed her lips. “But I think Elizabeth will provide him the strength he needs to get through it.” She leaned forward. “I can tell you that in the last month, my granddaughter and her son have only spent a handful of nights at home.”

Monica lifted her eyebrows. “Oh? It’s…that serious? Her son is spending time at the penthouse?”

“She comes by to pick up clothes, spends the night sometimes for show but…” Audrey lifted a shoulder. “I wouldn’t be surprised if the situation changed soon. If perhaps something more permanent might be in the cards.”

“Oh, I wonder if they’d get married,” Monica mused. “Do you…think he would invite me?”

“I would think Elizabeth would encourage it,” Audrey said after a moment. “Jason’s not as close with Sonny and Carly as he once was. He may be more open to a relationship. As long as you didn’t push.”

“I wouldn’t.” Monica held up a hand. “I really…I try to take my cues from Jason.”

“Anyhow, I don’t know about marriage. I think Elizabeth is still quite…apprehensive on the subject, with her failed wedding to Lucky, then that disaster of a marriage to Ric.” Audrey frowned. “And Jason’s own experience hasn’t been much better. But maybe for the sake of the children, they would consider it. It’s hard, I suppose. Things are so different than when I was their age.”

“Marriage is not always the endgame,” Monica agreed. “But yet, they’re still quick to jump to it, as if it’s some sort of sport.”

“I wish I could have been smarter at Elizabeth’s age,” Audrey said. “To learn how lucky I was with Steve, how I should have cherished our life together. I can see things I could have done differently, things he might have done, even little things.”

“Well, Alan and I managed to stay together,” Monica mused, “but I wonder if I had to live it again, if I would have done it so much more differently.” She paused. “Then again, I wouldn’t have Jason if not for the troubles in our marriage”

“True. I often forget he’s not your biological son, you loved him so well.” Audrey reached out and touched her hand. “He’s coming back to you, Monica. Little steps. He’s not the same man who woke from that coma or kept Michael from you.”

“I hope that’s true, but I’m content to see that he’s happy.” Monica paused. “And while he is not a man who wears his heart on his sleeve, I can see that he is with Elizabeth. I just hope it can stay that way.”

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

Jason was already home when Elizabeth arrived later that afternoon. She set down the black portfolio and curled up to him on the sofa where he was reading through some files. “Ugh.”

He gathered her into his side and pressed her lips to her hair. “Bad day.”

“Long day.” She snuggled into him. “Where are the kids?”

“Nora took them to the park for a bit. There’s some sort of kid activity she said they’d love but that involved balloons and face painting.” He grimaced. “I decided to skip that.” He stroked her hair, his fingers sliding through the silky strands. “Did your meeting with your agent go badly?”

“No. He’s just exhausting.” She drew back. “He wants to schedule another, smaller show for this winter.” She rolled her eyes. “An intimate one. No big deal, right? Except he thinks we should hold it at a gallery in Port Charles.”

Jason hesitated. “Do we have an art gallery here?”

“Yes. But it’s kind of low-class, according to Luther—that’s my agent.” She sighed. “And I made the mistake of mentioning how much easier my life would be if I could deal with a gallery closer than New York, which started the argument we had last year. When I told Luther I was coming back here, he wanted me to move to the city because it’d be better for my art.”

He didn’t like thinking about her not coming home last winter, knowing the only reason they were together was her love for her grandmother pulling her back. “Where did things end up?”

“He wants to talk to some of his contacts in New York, to see if anyone is interested in opening a branch up here, with my show as their launching pad.” She wrinkled her nose. “He’s hot to schedule another show as soon as possible.”

Jason didn’t really care one way or the other, but he knew how much it meant to her to make a living from her art, so he nodded. “Is there a reason for that? Do artists do that normally?”

“No, it’s usually a lot longer between shows, but I’ve been really prolific and…” Elizabeth looked down, her fingers tracing a pattern on his jeans. “He wants to capitalize on the changes in my life.”

“The changes…” Jason repeated, not following her.

“Oh…” Elizabeth huffed. “Apparently my personal relationship with you is driving up the prices on the few pieces that remained unsold from my showing, as well as pushing in commissions.”

“Your…” Jason closed his eyes. “Because I’m a high profile alleged criminal.” Was there any part of her life his choices wouldn’t corrupt eventually?

“I know, people are insane. They’re willing to pay above market value because I have a connection to you.” She bit her lip. “This doesn’t bother you, does it?”

“Doesn’t it bother you?” he responded. “People should buy your wok because it’s good, because it speaks to them. Not because of what I may or may not do as a career.” He shook his head. “I’m sorry, Elizabeth, I didn’t think about it—”

“Hey…” She pressed a finger to his chest. “What did you tell me about that red shoe painting I sold? When I was hung up with the idea that I’d made money of it. What did you say to me?”

Jason frowned. “That other people put the price on it, you just painted it.”

“Exactly. First, let me make this very clear to you. The fact that morons are willing to pay more money for one of my paintings because we’re dating says more about them than it does about you,” Elizabeth said. “Second, being with you has only made my art better. Luther looked at some of the photos I took of the pieces in my studio that I’ve been working on since April, and he says they show an emotional arc that people will eat up.” She smirked. “Apparently, the darkness, loneliness and isolation of my first show is going be completely eclipsed by the newfound hope for the future I’ve found.”

Jason scowled. “What darkness?”

She laughed, which eased the tightness in his chest. “It’s just art speak. Luther loves the new stuff, thinks it’ll sell even better than the last show. To show emotional growth, it’ll just engage the art world, make them part of the story.”

“I…” He blinked. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Yeah, neither do I. I just paint what I feel.” She shrugged and kicked off her heels. “That was actually the highlight of the meeting for me, even though I knew it would bother you a bit. The downside is this gallery idea — Luther wants me to partner in with whoever opens the branch. To lend my name will apparently give it credibility and popularity.” Her eyes were wide now. “I mean, do you hear those words? My name will lend credibility. Because I have a name in the art world.”

“That’s a good thing, right?” he asked, unsure. This was so out of his realm of comfort, he couldn’t begin to know the right thing to say.

“It’s weird.” She pursed her lips. “Jason, a year ago, no one had heard of me. I was in therapy, mostly feeling like a complete failure except for my beautiful little boy. And now, I’m…” She sighed and closed her eyes. “Now, I’m the toast of the art world, I have my amazing family and friends standing behind me…” Her eyes drifted open and they were sparkling. “I have you. I have Cameron and Evie. God, Jason, I am so ridiculously happy that I’m pretty sure I’ll screw it up any moment now. I’m really good at it.”

He leaned forward to capture her mouth in a soft kiss. “I know what you mean.”

“And I’m going to screw it right up now,” she said on a sigh when she drew away.

“What?” Jason frowned. “Elizabeth—”

“I ran into Carly when I was leaving earlier,” she said. “Jason…I think I know what she wants from you.”

Jason sighed, disentangled himself from Elizabeth, and crossed to the window to look out over the harbor. “To sign my guardianship of Evie over to Sonny.”

“Yeah…”

He heard the rustling as she stood. “Jason,” she continued, her voice drawing closer. “I don’t know how much longer we can put off making a decision.”

He turned to face her. “I thought I had. I told Sonny I wasn’t going to—”

“I know what you told him,” Elizabeth interrupted. “But Carly remains the wild card. Jason, I want…” She hesitated. “I want to build a life with you. That’s what all these months have been about. I have always understood how matters came to this point, but I don’t understand why…” She dipped her head. “Why we don’t get Sonny some help.”

“You say that like it’s so easy.” Jason folded his arms, feeling uncharacteristically annoyed with her, even though he knew she was right. “You think it’s the first time that’s been suggested?”

“I’m saying that I understand that the situation is difficult,” Elizabeth drew out the words. “That it’s not just about Sonny’s mental well-being. I know if any sign of weakness becomes apparent to the people who aren’t loyal to Sonny, it’ll create problems. You told me you’ve spent years placating him in these moods. I don’t know if that’s going to work this time—”

“I can’t force him to get help.” He shook his head. “Short of that, all I can do is minimize the damage—” He stopped. “What exactly did Carly say to you?”

“She’s so angry inside, Jason. She tells me how much you’ve protected her, she even told me that she knows Sam was part of a plan to continue that protection, to protect that boys.” Elizabeth shook her head. “I think she’s still trying to play as if she doesn’t know anything, but I don’t buy it. Her anger towards Sam is so fresh, but Jason…I’m scared for you.”

“For me?” Jason shook his head. “Carly isn’t a danger to me—”

“Really?” Elizabeth asked, tilting her head. “All the while she’s talking to me about knowing the damage she’s done, I only see the way her eyes look when she talks about you. And it’s not the way it used to be. Right now, she blames Sam. She blames herself. But we both know Carly isn’t going to play the martyr for long. It’s not a skin she fits in well.”

Jason sighed and rubbed his face. “You think she’ll blame me.”

“I think she’s halfway there even if she doesn’t recognize it.” Elizabeth stepped towards him. “You’ve told me yourself—in his good moments, Sonny seems to recognize his reasons for letting the situation stand, but in his worst moments, he blames you. Do you think Carly doesn’t see that? She’s so used to you fixing things. If you don’t come through for her, if you let Sonny crash and her world collapses with him, do you think she won’t find a way to blame you?”

“So, what do I do? Sign her away, give Sam’s daughter to Carly and Sonny?” Jason shook his head. “I-I can’t do that. Elizabeth, I can’t believe you’re asking me—”

“I’m not asking you to do anything,” Elizabeth said. “I love Evie, too. And I have a great deal of respect for Sam and her wishes, because I know what it’s like to feel disposable, to be desperate to protect yourself and your child from a man who’ll just ruin it all. I was married to Sonny’s brother, Jason. Do you think I don’t know the darkness that runs in their family? I want to keep her as far away from Sonny and Carly as possible. Unless Sonny gets some help, he’ll never be a fit father.”

He had never considered that Ric’s brand of insanity might be in anyway related to Sonny’s, but again he’d disregarded Elizabeth’s own experiences in this. She knew what it was like to be surrounded by someone who was sinking, refusing to see it, refusing to ask for help.

“So what do I do?” Jason asked.

Elizabeth closed her eyes. “I can’t…I can’t tell you that, Jason. This isn’t my world. I don’t know the ramifications in your business—”

“Forget that for a minute.” Jason shook his head. “Just…if I go to Sonny, lay this all out, tell him Carly knows, and has known for months, and still refuse to give up guardianship, do you really think he’d get help?”

“Or it might make matters worse,” Elizabeth said softly. “I know that. And God, Jason, the last thing I want to do is make this worse for you, but I…” She pressed her lips together. “Jason, I love you. And it kills me to see you like this. I’ve never known you to be paralyzed like this.”

He walked past her and sat on the arm of the sofa. “I love you, too,” he said, finally. “And you’re right. We can’t build a life together unless we start making decisions.”

Elizabeth’s eyes softened. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her forehead to his. “I would take this all away for you if I could.” Her fingers slid through his hair, and he closed his eyes.

She was right. He’d been living like this for nearly a year, waiting for Sonny to change his mind, waiting for Carly to walk out. Waiting for the situation to explode. He wanted something different in his life. He wanted to have Elizabeth with him, to be with Cam and Evie, to have a family, even if he didn’t truly deserve it.

He’d spent too many years walking away from that.

It was time to walk towards something.

“I’ll talk to Sonny,” he said finally. “But…I can’t—I have to wait, make sure he’s in control. It’s the only way to make sure he listens to me.” His hands slid down to her waist, tracing the lines of her body, the feel of her skin beneath soft fabric of her dress. “I’ll make it clear. It’s time Carly knew the truth, and more importantly, that he needs to get help. Or…”

He paused. “I can pursue adoption for Evie after a year. That’s in November. If he hasn’t gotten help by then, he never will, and I’m not going to put my life on hold anymore hoping he will.”

Corinthos Penthouse: Living Room

It was late in the evening when Carly returned home, annoyed with herself for the confrontation with Elizabeth in the garage. She had tried so hard to keep her cool, to show Elizabeth that she was welcome at Harborview. That she and her son were a good thing in Jason’s life.

And instead, the vitriol poured out like it always did. Why couldn’t she control herself anymore? She’d blurted out the truth to Courtney all those months ago and it was only because her sister-in-law wanted to preserve the status quo that she’d refrained from telling Jason.

Carly kicked off her heels and lowered herself into the armchair adjacent to the sofa, her head throbbing. She was so tired. To the bone and even the deep tissues of her muscles tired. That kind of soul-shattering exhaustion she remembered when she’d been pregnant with Michael and trying like hell to keep the house of cards from caving in.

Jason must suspect that Carly knew more than she was telling. If he hadn’t before now, Elizabeth would surely tell him about the parking garage where she’d almost overplayed her hand.

Behind her, Sonny came in. Her husband murmured something to the guard on the door before walking to the mini bar to pour himself a bourbon. “Where are the boys?”

“At my mother’s,” Carly replied. She slowly straightened and drew her legs underneath her. “How was your day?”

“Fine.” Sonny tossed back the alcohol. “Didn’t fight with Jason, so that’s something.”

And Carly wanted to believe it meant something that it had been nearly a month since Sonny’s last violent mood swing, but she knew it didn’t. He still hadn’t had that crash. They were in a holding pattern, just waiting for the next storm.

And she was so close to tossing in her hand and walking away.

No. She could still do this. She’d meant what she said to Elizabeth earlier. Carly had started the damage between Jason and Sonny, and she knew that she’d played a heavy role in the events of the year before.

Jason couldn’t keep Evie. It couldn’t happen if Sonny was ever going to be the man he was before. Her husband was drowning in guilt, in anger and hatred for himself. Soon enough, that distaste would turn to her because it was her fault.

And Jason would ultimately be the one to end this stand-off, because he held guardianship. He’d have to sign it over for Sonny to start the road back to something normal.

But Carly knew she could change the game, and maybe it was time for a fresh hand.

“Sonny.”

He glanced at her over his shoulder, his eyes dark and weary. “What?”

“I know Evie is your daughter.”

The last few days, CG has had some loading issues. Sometimes you’ll click on a link and it might tell you the page hasn’t been found. That’s not because the page isn’t there, but because the site has exceeded my share of the resources on my hosting plan.  That’s not fun for anyone, haha, so I’m going to upgrade from shared hosting to a private server. It’s about $5 more a month, which isn’t horrible, actually.

I’ll be doing it at the end of the week, but it’s going to take sometime to migrate the site to the new server. I’m not sure how long but it’s likely the site would be down for a day or so. Since I’m scheduled to post The Best Thing, Chapter 14 tomorrow, and All I Want for Christmas, Part 3 on Thursday, that means the site would go down shortly within a day or so of posting them. Not my favorite option.

So I’m thinking about posting both of them today only at CG so there’s extra time to make sure you get to that material before the end of the week, so if the site is down all weekend, you still get to read it. I’d keep to the normal schedule on the other sites.

Thoughts?

December 7, 2014

sitenewsSo this is the last time I plan to post updates about this particular theme to the main part of the site. The majority of the tweaks that needed to be done are either completed, or are in the process. All that’s left is a few cosmetic changes.

The menu at the top of the page has been completed. The addition of the writing tab is also ready — the Fanfiction 101 series once located under “Site” is now there, with maybe more to come. But the Sort/Site section is now complete.

The media page is under construction — most of what was there were links to videos and soundtracks that been redistributed to their specific story pages (A Few Words Too Many, Daughters, and These Small Hours). What’s left will be reorganized into one Music page.

I also started to work on the various story pages to go with the new style design. Mostly just cleaning up character images, replacing the bolded words Characters/Background with styling for color changes.  There’s no point in listing all the specific ones updated so far.

The Fiction Graveyard section got a slight face lift — I worked on the way information is listed and continued work on the story pages in that area. I’m still gathering and formatting all the stories for this so that once I start posting, I can just do it in large chunks. Otherwise, it takes too long to format chapter by chapter.

The next time I bug you guys will be a story update on Wednesday with The Best Thing 🙂

December 6, 2014

christmasI moved around my posting schedule for All I Want For Christmas in order to lessen the gap between a few parts. I’ll be posting the next part on Thursday, Dec 11 and then Part Four on Dec 16. I want to post often, but space it out so that Christmas Eve chapters are closer to that date, and finish it with New Year’s Eve.

Lisa asked about the angst content — when you compare it to A Few Words or The Best Thing, it’s practically pure fluff. But, haha, yes, there’s some conflict.

The response to that first part has been amazing, and it means so much. I post across five sites (here, Road to Nowhere, Archive of Our Own, Fanfiction.net, and Liason Underground) and though it can often be a time consuming process, it’s worth it since I average closer to 15-20 feedback responses for everything I post. You guys are fantastic 🙂

My aim at CG is make it easier for you guys to find what you want to read and to find it fast. If there is anything I can do to facilitate this, to make it easier, please don’t hesitate to tell me. This site is for you guys, after all 🙂 madworld

I had a breakthrough on Mad World, and I was finally able to iron out the ending. I think it’s so much better than the original story or the second attempt to plot it and I’m looking forward to outlining it in more detail. Thanks for the response to the poll.

I’m still tweaking the site so please bear with me 😀

This entry is part 2 of 9 in the All I Want For Christmas

Santa baby, forgot to mention one little thing
A ring
I don’t mean a phone
Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight
Hurry down the chimney tonight
Hurry down the chimney tonight

Santa Baby, Eartha Kitt


December 2

ELQ: Jason Morgan’s Office

“Spinelli, hold my calls until I’ve finished meeting with Ms. Webber,” Jason told his gangly executive administrative assistant as Elizabeth slipped past him into his office.

“Yes, sir, Mr. Morgan, sir.”

Jason closed the door and flashed a smile at Elizabeth as she stood in the middle of his office, her portfolio clutched in her hands as always. “Good morning.”

“Good morning,” she replied, drawing her bottom lip between her teeth. She shifted her weight from one black stiletto heel to the other. “Ah. Did you get the contracts? I had Kiki drop them off with your assistant.”

“Mmm-hmm,” Jason nodded. “Have a seat,” he told her, gesturing towards the shortened conference table. “Do you want coffee or tea? I can ask Spinelli to bring it in—”

“I’m fine.” Elizabeth sat down, careful to smooth her black skirt down so it didn’t bunch up. “Emily signed the contracts before her vacation—”

“It looks fine.” Jason brought his own coffee over. She appeared to be in a hurry to conduct business, but Jason didn’t mind drawing her out a bit more—her cheeks were flushed and she was having trouble making eye contact for more than a moment.

Nothing to talk about, indeed.

“Um…” She twisted her pen in her slim fingers. “I think…maybe we should…” Elizabeth sighed. “About yesterday. When you asked if there was anything else we should talk about.”

“Yes?” Jason tilted his head, unable to hold back his grin. “You said there was nothing.”

“So…I might have overstated that.” Elizabeth shifted. “It’s just…what happened that night…” She took a deep breath. “Look, I don’t usually get drunk and hit on my boss—”

“I’m not your boss,” Jason told her. An important distinction.

“Right. Well, anyway.” Elizabeth pursed her lips. “My roommates were there that night, and one of them dared me to drink this ridiculous mixed cocktail with like…a ton of alcohol—” She huffed. “Not that I was too drunk to know what I was doing. That’s not what I’m saying.”

“Nothing would have happened if I thought you were,” Jason said. “There’s no benefit to me to spending time with someone too intoxicated to enjoy it.” He leaned forward. “And I hope I’m not being too arrogant if I assume we both enjoyed ourselves.”

“Well, yes, of course.” The flush spread to her collarbone and the chest area revealed by the white silk blouse she wore. “I mean, I’d been attracted to you before that—” She closed her eyes. “Okay, not important.”

He considered it very important, but filed it away for later. “Elizabeth—”

“Anyway. I woke up the next morning, and I just…I panicked, so I just…said the first thing that came to my mind and left.” She twisted in her chair. “I know it’s…practically history to you, but I just…we’re going to be working together for the next few weeks—”

“Why is it history to me?” Jason interrupted. “It was just a few weeks ago—”

“You…never said anything afterward.” Elizabeth blinked. “I mean, you…never…I don’t know, you didn’t call. So I just…”

“Elizabeth.” Jason leaned back, casually resting a foot on his opposite knee. “As far as I was concerned, you’d made it clear you weren’t interested in pursuing it past that night. Even considered it a mistake.”

“Oh.” Her eyes widened just slightly. “Well, I didn’t. Not exactly, I mean.” She shook her head. “Well, I guess now that we’ve cleared the air—”

Jason let both feet drop to the floor and leaned forward, lowering his voice. “Are you saying you’d be interested?”

The discomfort bled from her shoulders and the light in her eyes changed. She tilted her head to the side. “Are you saying you are?”

“A man would have to be dead a couple of years if they weren’t interested in you.” He reached for her hand and toyed with the fingers.

Her lips parted slightly. “This is probably a bad idea,” she murmured. “But right now, I can’t remember why.”

He grinned. “What do you say we deal with the business at hand and if you’re not busy tonight…a drink after work?”

“That sounds…perfect.”

The Next Day

Elizabeth rolled her eyes. “You had these contracts yesterday, Jason.” She leaned over him at his desk as he skimmed the catering paperwork in front of him.

“Your assistant left it with Spinelli who forgot to drop them in my box before I went home.” Jason flipped a page. “This isn’t too much to pay for caviar?”

She arched a brow. “How would you even know? It’s competitive. And I find it hard to believe Spinelli forgot. The kid worships you.” She wrinkled her nose, and leaned against the desk as he continued to peruse. “How did you end up with him? He doesn’t exactly give off that executive air.”

“He drives my grandfather crazy, so he has a job forever as far as I’m concerned.” Jason scrawled his initials on a page before flipping to the next. “He used to work in one of the tech departments. My computer broke. He fixed it. I promoted him.”

“I’m sure that’s the entire story.” Elizabeth shrugged. “Whatever. I stole mine away from my last employer.”

“Right.” Jason signed the last page and glanced up at her. “Emily went to a party last summer you planned at an art gallery. She was quite proud she lured you away.”

“Just between us?” Elizabeth leaned in, a wicked smile playing across her lips. “I hated my job so much if Emily had just offered me a dollar over my current salary, I would have leapt at it. As it was, you guys paid dearly.” She snorted. “And made quite the enemy of Ava Jerome, since I convinced her daughter to jump ship.”

“Well, you’re worth every penny.” He grinned at her, but the tease fell short of its charming intention. She returned the smile, but shifted away from the desk.

“Thanks for signing those. I’ll have Kiki get them over to the caterers.” She reached for the pile, but Jason caught her wrist.

“What? What’d I say?”

“Nothing.” Elizabeth offered her a half smile. “There’s…just a ton more vendors to nail down this week. I mean, most are holding the dates open because Emily always uses them, but I still need to negotiate prices for this year, and—”

He drew her down into his lap, and she sighed. “Elizabeth. We had a good time last night, didn’t we? I like you. If I say something that offends you, I can’t read your mind to find out what it is.”

She pursed her lips. “Nothing. I just…I mean, I know…” She huffed. “This sound so stupid when I say it out loud, so believe me, I’m aware I’m an idiot. But…we slept together last month. And now…I don’t know…we’re…” She wiggled her fingers. “Whatever—”

“And me saying you’re worth every penny when I’ve barely worked with you strikes you as a services rendered comment,” Jason finished.

“I told you it was stupid.” She slid her fingers over the nape of his neck, playing with the short hairs there. “I know you didn’t mean it that way—”

“Emily has done nothing but rave about you for months,” Jason told her. “She told AJ the only reason she could even dream of taking this time off was because she knew you’d step in without a hiccup. My sister has been working at ELQ for seven years. She’s never so much as taken a weekend off, let alone a month, so when I say you’re worth every penny, I mean it because I know how much Emily depends on you.”

“Well, see, now I feel even more stupid.” Lacing her other hand behind his neck, she continued. “How can I ever make it up to you?”

“Well…” Jason’s hand slid around her waist and drew her closer. “I think we can think of a few things.”

Her laugh slid into a moan as his lips covered hers, his fingers burning into the skin beneath her thin red dress. A trail of heat burned down her thigh as Jason’s hand slid around to her knee.

“If I could make a request,” he murmured, drawing back slightly. “You look great in these little pencil skirts, but they’re not exactly….conducive to this type of activity.”

“I’ll take that under advisement.” Elizabeth reluctantly disentangled her arms from his neck. “I really should go send these contracts back.”

“I have late meetings tonight,” Jason admitted. “Tomorrow?”

Elizabeth scooped the paperwork from his desk, and grinned over her shoulder as she headed out.

This was going to end in complete disaster, but her roommates were right. Opportunities with men like Jason came along so rarely, she was going to hold on with both hands and enjoy every minute.

For the rest of that first week together, their daily meetings became less about the paperwork Jason barely studied before scrawling the necessary signature at the bottom. Instead the half hour he’d carved out of his morning schedule were spent in his office chair or curled up on the sofa, making out like teenagers.

That first weekend, she’d hoped to spend the night with him, but an emergency with an ELQ subsidiary sent Jason to New York until Sunday evening.

Monday morning, Elizabeth breezed past Spinelli into Jason’s office. He was leaning against his desk, grinning. “You’re early,” he teased.

“Did you get the contracts Kiki sent over?” Elizabeth asked, tossing her portfolio on the conference table.

“Already signed.” Jason eyed her outfit. “I like the dress.”

She arched a brow, stepped forward and grabbed his shirt in her fist. “Any other business?”

“None that I can think of.”

She had clearly not enjoyed his absence any more than he’d liked spending the weekend away, as they came together in a tangle of lips and hands, each trying desperately to get closer. His suit jacket was on the floor before he knew what to think and her back hit the sofa with a hard fall.

“Sorry,” he muttered, torn between dragging her dress over her knees or tugging the wide cowl neck over her shoulders. Her busy hands were drawing apart his shirt and tugging it from his pants.

“Didn’t even notice,” she responded, her breaths coming in short pants as his lips nipped at her collarbone. “You have the best hands.”

“Yours aren’t so shabby.” He drew back slightly to brush a kiss on her lips. “I missed you.”

“I missed you, too.” Elizabeth flushed, her fingers dancing down his bare chest. “I bought something special for Saturday night.”

“Well, I hope you’re free tonight to put it to use,” Jason said, his hand sliding past her knee to the soft skin of her inner thigh.

“It’s all right, Spinelli. I’ll just be a minute—” The door opened on those words and his cousin, Ned Ashton, stopped in the doorway. “Ah. Sorry.”

Elizabeth squeaked and frantically tried to get out from beneath Jason, who just slowly rose to his feet and glared at his cousin. “If Spinelli tells you I’m busy—”

“Next time, I’ll listen.” Ned arched a brow. “You must be Elizabeth.”

“Um…” Elizabeth shoved her rumpled hair over her shoulder. “This…” She sighed. “Yeah, that’d be me.”

“I’ll just leave these notes here.” Ned laid the papers on a table near the door. “I’ll see you at the board meeting later.”

He exited, and Elizabeth stepped away when Jason reached for her. “I’ll have to learn to lock the door—”

“Jason, do you know that’s the first time I’ve seen the CEO of this company?” She buried her head in hands. “Oh, man. What a first impression.”

“It’s not a big deal—”

“Not a big deal,” Elizabeth repeated flatly. “I suppose Ned walks in on you with women all the time.”

“No,” Jason drawled. “But I’ve walked in on him enough that I think I’ve earned one in return.” He drew her closer. “Listen. It’s not the end of the world. He’s not just a nameless corporate shill. He’s my cousin. He’s not going to care.”

“I guess we were flirting with disaster….being so unprofessional at work,” she murmured.” She combed her fingers through her hair. “Thank God my office is just down the hall. Kiki probably won’t even notice.”

“Well, we should see each other more often outside these four walls.” He brushed a kiss against her unsmiling lips. “I’ve been stuck in meetings, but I should be clear for tonight. And…I’d like to take you to the ELQ parties later this month.”

Elizabeth furrowed her brow. “I’ll be there anyway, Jason. I—I’ll be working—”

“Yes,” Jason said. “But I’d like to take you as my date. Pick you up. Drop you off.” He grinned. “Maybe not so much the second part.”

A nervous laugh escaped her lips. “Jason…that’s…the entire company will be there. Not to mention pretty much all the richest people in the state.”

“Which is why I want to spend time with someone I actually like.”

“But…” Elizabeth twisted her fingers together. “Then…everyone would see us together.”

“Ah…” Jason rubbed the back of his neck. “Is…that something that would be a problem? Because I didn’t think it would have to be a secret.”

“There’s a difference between a discreet…whatever and…making the grand debut at the biggest events of the year.” Elizabeth wrinkled her nose. “I’ll…can I just…think about it?”

Slightly annoyed, but knowing that he’d asked her on the tail end of a particularly embarrassing moment, he let it slide. “Fine.”

“Okay.” She reached for the portfolio she’d discarded earlier. “Um, just…send those contracts back to me when you’re done with them.”

“I already signed them,” Jason reminded her. He reached for the small stack. “I’ll call you later to firm up plans for tonight.”

“Okay.” Elizabeth leaned in for another kiss. “Jason, I really…I’m glad you asked me. It’s just…I’m an employee. I…have to think these things through more.”

“I guess.” Jason watched her go, cursing her cousin and himself for his poor timing.

ELQ: Ned Ashton’s Office

Ned just grinned at him when Jason followed AJ into his office for their monthly board meeting prep. “Jason. Glad you could tear yourself away.”

AJ arched a brow as he crossed to the mini bar to pour himself a tumbler of gin. “Something going on I should know about?”

“No,” Jason said, sending Ned a dark look. “He’s an idiot.”

“Jason was being welcomed back in fine fashion by Emily’s assistant when I dropped by this morning.” Ned sat down at the conference table. “I see you’re making the best of your unexpected foray into event planning.”

“Elizabeth?” AJ asked. “Damn it. I was waiting another month for her settle in before I turned on the charm.” He sipped the gin. “You’ve scooped her up before I even had a chance—”

“If either of you value your lives, you’ll shut up now.” Jason stabbed a finger at Ned. “Don’t you dare mention this morning to her again. She’s mortified that’s the way she met the CEO.”

Ned waved it away. “Didn’t you tell her it’s a family tradition? It’s how we always meet the new women.” He shuddered. “I actually walked in on Grandfather once.”

AJ scowled. “Why the hell do you gotta put those images in my head? Seriously. There’s not enough liquor in the world.”

“I’m sure you’d try to find it,” Jason said dryly as his older brother turned the glare on him.

“And didn’t you tell her that’s how you met my first wife?” Ned asked.

“And mine,” AJ said. “Well, the only wife. And it was my bedroom at home. Once you go Carly, you turn away marriage pretty much forever. If not for Michael. I’d block that out for good.” He sighed. “Twenty-two years of blissful freedom. Never get married when you’re eighteen. You know nothing about life.”

“Isn’t it how you met my second wife, too?” Ned frowned. “I distinctly remember Lois and Alexis never forgiving me for that lock.”

“How do you even keep them straight?” AJ asked. “I mean other than Lois, because you know, Brooke. But I don’t even think I remember the other two.”

“Alexis’s sister,” Jason reminded him. “And the blonde that made Carly look normal.”

“Faith.” Ned sighed in memory. “Insane, but worth all six months.”

“Right, so didn’t you just tell Elizabeth it’s practically family tradition?” AJ asked. “Though come to think of it, it is the first time we’ve caught you.”

“You’re just including yourself in my discovery?” Ned asked. “Of course you are.”

“If you mention it to her even once, I’ll make you sorry you got out of bed in the morning.” Jason leaned forward. “Are we understood?”

“Fine, but I swear, the next gorgeous woman who comes to work here, I have dibs,” AJ told him. “I should have called dibs in July.”

“Way to act five years old,” Ned sighed. “You’ll have free reign since it looks like Jason and I are otherwise engaged.” He hesitated. “To be serious for a moment, Jason. I hope you’ve thought this through. If it doesn’t work out, and Elizabeth leaves the company, Emily will never let you forget it.”

Jason narrowed his eyes. “I don’t foresee it being a problem.”

“You never do at the beginning,” AJ said, with a sad sigh. “And then you wake up one morning and realize you’ve married a piranha.”

December 5, 2014

So I know this doesn’t look look a whole lot different than the last theme (header and three columns) but you’ll notice the colors and design is a bit more evenly distributed. I’m not done tweaking it yet. One of the most difficult things about customizing a wordpress theme is the CSS (which controls the colors, the links, pretty much everything that makes your page pretty) because every theme and every element has a specific name.

I’m still playing with it, but it’s ready for wider distribution since it’s better than the old one. Let me know if something doesn’t work or you simply can’t stand something.

Update

As I remarked earlier, I’m continuing to tweak the site. I fixed the site images in the right hand side bar so that they’re showing side by side (or they will if your screen resolution is wide enough).

I will continue to work on this — adding styling elements and tweaking for future customization and layouts. So here’s what I already know needs to be done:

1. Comments — It’s pretty close, there’s still some work to be done.
2. The Sort Stories & Site links in the top menus. These are just short cuts to the areas that already exist in the sidebars, I’m just putting them in a more easily seen spot. The Stories and Readers sections are ready to go.  The Home link has been removed from the Story section because there’s a huge prominent one now.

I’m also working on updating each story page with a bit more organization, but that is an ongoing process and won’t likely all be done at the same time.

So other than those issues, if you have an issue with the site (if there’s a color not working for you, or something is just so ugly you want to set it on fire), please let me know!!

December 3, 2014

First things first: The Best Thing, Chapter Thirteen has been added. I’ll probably continue posting it only once a week until it’s completed. It’s a difficult story to write due to the content and the type of subject I’m dealing with. If I finish it ahead of a schedule, I might bump up the posting, but only if I have another story ready.

That being said, I have a much more straightforward story I’m working on, All We Are, the marriage of convenience story I’ve been playing around with. I already have three chapters done, and I hope to be about halfway through by the end of the month. I can start posting that in late January/early February so I’m posting twice a week.

Once those two stories are done, I’m unsure what story will be next. I should work with Feels Like Home (the rewrite of Tangle), as it’s storyboarded and ready to go, but I also have Mad World, For the Broken Girl, and These Small Hours also in the wings.  I should have a more definitive idea once we get into the new year.

On the subject of Mad World, I’m still working out some plot details. If you’ve read the preview I posted in the spring, you know the PCPD is going to have a hand in this case.  Rather than creating original characters as police officers, I thought about bringing an old cast member back. Taggart’s already in the story.

I could either utilize Dante, Jesse Beaudry, Nathan, David Harper or Cruz Rodriguez. The latter two were Lucky’s partners in 2008 and 2006 respectively. Or I could go ahead a create an original character. Whenever I can’t decide these things, I turn to you guys.

[socialpoll id=”2235360″]

So please let me know what you think 🙂