April 12, 2014

This entry is part 6 of 29 in the Surviving the Past

It was late afternoon when Elizabeth entered the warehouse. She stopped just inside Sonny’s office, seeing Jason and Sonny sitting inside. She felt her face flush and she looked at her hands.

She didn’t remember a lot of the previous night, only waking up at the hospital this morning. She’d gotten the idea that it’d been a bad nightmare and she couldn’t calm herself down afterwards. That she’d asked for Jason. And she remembered Jason being there, comforting her, but she’d imagined that a lot after waking from the nightmares. Sometimes, pretending Jason was there was the only way she could go back to sleep.

“Hi,” she said softly catching their attention. They both sprang from their chairs.

“Liz,” Sonny said, coming from behind his desk. “Hey, how are you?”

She tucked her hair behind her ears and smiled. “I’m feeling better. I’m sorry if I worried you last night.” She glanced at Jason, “Any of you. I just had a nightmare and I guess it was really bad.”

Sonny sighed. “You know you can trust me right?”

Elizabeth nodded, “Of course.”

Sonny looked up at the ceiling and then back at her. “I won’t push you for answers because I know that I wouldn’t get them. But, if you need to talk, I’ll be here.”

Elizabeth nodded. “I know.”

Sonny checked his watch. “I have to go. A shipment’s coming in and it needs my personal attention. Jason can let you know what I need.” He kissed her on the cheek and left.

Elizabeth walked forward. “So, what’s up?”

Jason stared at her. “You know that I was at the hospital last night, right?”

She flushed. “Oh.” Oh, lord, how mortifying! She hadn’t been pretending last night – Jason had calmed her down. “Um, I hope I didn’t worry you.”

“Elizabeth…” He lowered his voice, the tone gentle. “You told me that I’d once helped you through a difficult time. Did that have anything to do with last night?”

She sighed. He sounded so much like Jason Quartermaine. She closed her eyes and blinked back the tears. He’s not Jason Quartermaine anymore. He’s Jason Morgan now, and the only reason he’s asking is because you confused the hell out of him last night.

She took a deep breath and opened her eyes. “I don’t know. I can never remember my dreams.”

He took a step back. She was lying to him. He could tell it just from the tears in her eyes and the way she was standing. He narrowed his eyes. “Then what about what you told me last night? That you used to climb in my window.”

Elizabeth bit her lip, “Um, yeah. That’s true.”

“Why?” He crossed his arms. He could hear her words in his head about Jason Quartermaine and how he’d keep pushing until she confessed. Well, maybe the guy had a point. “Why couldn’t you stay at home?”

She rubbed her arms. “Uh, I couldn’t sleep and when I would, I’d have horrible nightmares. You knew and you told me that when it got to be too much, I could knock on your window and one night, I did.”

“Why couldn’t you sleep?” Jason demanded.

She shook her head. “I don’t want to do this right now okay?” Her voice was thick and she was on the verge of hysteria. She couldn’t deal with this again. She’d already bared her soul yesterday. Doing it again would more than likely cause another night like the previous one. She didn’t think she could do that again and she wouldn’t go through that terror again just to satisfy his damn curiosity. She’d trusted him once and he’d left her. It may not have been his fault but he still left. “What did Sonny need me to do?”

Jason exhaled slowly. He’d gotten some information and he could see she was getting upset again. He turned his attention to the subject he and Sonny had been discussing before she’d arrived. “Uh, someone’s trying to move in on the territory.”

Elizabeth’s eyes hardened and she took a deep breath. “What’s been happening?”

“Sonny doesn’t have any concrete proof, but someone’s moving some men in and there’s evidence that there are few dealers in the area.” Jason grabbed a folder on the desk. “Sonny wanted to you run these names and get full background checks.”

She took the folder and headed to the desk across the room where she worked while at the warehouse. It had a high-speed computer and printer and a couple of picture frames. Other than that, it was completely bare. She sat down and booted the computer. “What are you going to do?”

“I’m going to check on some of the informants’ information. Sonny wants the dealers out of the territory before they can cause any real damage.” Jason watched her start keying some things into the computer. “So once you know anything you think can help, just call me.” He grabbed a piece of paper from Sonny’s desk and jotted his cell phone number. “Here.”

She took it from him, not looking up. “Not a problem. I’ll probably be here all night, so expect a call at any time.”

“I’ll be waiting.” He glanced at her again and left.

Once he was safely out of the room, she sighed and leaned back. Staying up all night to concentrate on background checks seemed like a good idea at that point. It would keep the nightmares at bay.

For one night at least.

Carly ushered Emily into the penthouse. “So have you seen her today?”

Emily nodded, “Yeah. She seems really tired but she’s not talking about last night at all. It’s like she’s trying to pretend it didn’t happen.”

Carly eyed her. “What did happen?”

“Just what I said,” Emily replied. “Look, let’s not get into that. I wouldn’t tell Jason and I’m not telling you.”

Carly nodded, “Fair enough. Um, I scheduled the launch party for June 20th, which gives us about three weeks.”

Emily nodded. “They seem to be getting along better.”

Carly tapped her chin thoughtfully. “How does Liz feel about motorcycles?”

Emily shrugged. “I don’t think she has an opinion. Why?”

“Because Jason’s perfect woman needs to be able to handle a ride on his bike. He takes that thing everywhere. So we need to arrange a ride.”

Emily nodded. “Sounds like a good idea. And Beth would have to hold on to him.”

Carly grinned, “Definitely.” She wiggled her eyebrows. “And you’ve seen him. After feeling those muscles, she won’t be able to resist him.”

“You have a good point. So what else can we do?”

Carly bit her lip. “Well, we have to make sure they’re in situations together. We can’t let them avoid each other.”

Emily sat back and leaned her head against the back of the chair. “Beth is coming into Deception tomorrow right?”

Carly nodded. “She’s got a half day because she’s helping Sonny with something. I think she’s leaving for the warehouse around lunch.”

“So, I’ll tell Jason something like I need to see and I’ll ask for a ride there just as she’s leaving. And I’ll stop to talk to Beth, and she’ll mention she’s leaving and hopefully Jason will offer her a ride.”

Carly grinned. “Jason’s a white knight type of person. You know he will.”

Emily rubbed her hands together. “Oh, I forgot to mention. We have two new supporters, my brother and my grandmother.”

“Lila?” Carly clapped her hands together. “Oh, you know if you have her approval, we’re on the right track. She’s the one who introduced me to Sonny and she’s the reason AJ and Courtney are together…she has a knack for this. And you know Jason and Liz love her. And AJ can really help on the Jason end. He’s a guy. He knows how to relate to other guys.”

Emily nodded. “Looks like our little plan is going exactly the way we want.” She sighed. “And I hope we can help her out with what’s going on.”

Carly frowned. “You said Jason wants to know. Sonny came home today and all he would tell me is that she’d asked for Jason and he seemed able to calm her down.” She studied Emily carefully. “Did Jason Quartermaine help the same way?”

Emily bit her lip. “Let’s just say that Jason has always been good to her and getting them together can only help.”

Elizabeth rubbed her eyes and leaned back to take a quick break. It was nearly midnight and she barely had anything that would help. Personally, she’d rather be out doing some of the legwork.

She sipped the coffee and immediately made a face. It was disgusting. She tossed into the trash.

“Getting frustrated?”

Elizabeth looked up, startled. Jason was at the doorway. He had a bag and two cups of coffee.

“Hey, what are you doing here?” she asked.

He shrugged. “I checked with everyone, didn’t get anything useful.” He dropped the bag on her desk and handed her a cup. “So I stopped by Kelly’s. I figured you wouldn’t have eaten.”

“Thanks,” Elizabeth replied.

He grabbed a chair and put it in front of her desk. “Find anything?”

She shook her head. “But I’m only a quarter of the way through the list. Something will come up.” She sipped the coffee. “This was just what I needed.”

Jason took a Styrofoam box out of the bag and handed it to her. “I wasn’t sure what you liked, so I just got a bacon cheeseburger.”

She took the box. “It’s my favorite actually,” she said softly. “I always order it when I go there.”

Jason took another box out and opened it. “Did the four of us go there a lot?” he asked.

Elizabeth nodded, “Every day after school. The limo used to pick us up there. From the time I was seven until I graduated, I ate dinner at Kelly’s every school day. I hated eating with my family. It was always such a huge ordeal.” She wrinkled her nose and bit into the burger. “I preferred being at your house. Your family was great until…” she trailed off.

Jason’s face darkened, “Until they blamed AJ for the accident and threatened to have him arrested.” He shook his head. “I still don’t see them. I’m only close to Lila.”

Elizabeth nodded. “Lila’s great. I still go to see her all the time.” She sighed. “I remember all the fighting that went on when you were in the hospital. Edward and Alan were threatening to have AJ arrested, Ned was trying to get him off the hook by saying he was in the car and Monica wanted to put him in rehab.” She frowned. “I just think they handled the entire situation badly. And I’m glad you didn’t let what happened effect your relationship with AJ.”

Jason shrugged. “It’s not like he woke up one day and decided that he going to destroy my life. I’m sure I thought I was doing the right thing by getting in the car with him. He was drunk and I obviously knew that. Personally, I see it as my fault. I should have yanked him out of the car. Anyway, AJ went to rehab and got help. It’s not like he kept drinking. He’s been clean for four years now and he leads a good life. I’ve got no hard feelings.”

Elizabeth didn’t say anything and concentrated on eating her dinner. She would prefer not to think about before the accident anymore. The night Jason had had the accident was one of the nights that she’d snuck into his room. She’d waited for hours before hearing the screams downstairs. She’d snuck into the hallway and all she could make out were the words “AJ, Jason” and “hospital.” She went back into his room and climbed back down and went back to her house. She’d gotten dressed and called a cab to the hospital. Emily had been so thankful to see her that she hadn’t thought to ask how she knew. AJ had been in the hospital for three days with his injuries, but Jason had been in the coma for a week before waking up. Elizabeth and Emily had practically lived at the hospital. They’d taken turns visiting the brothers. Lila had visited early on, but was too upset to return. Edward, Alan, Monica and Ned were too busy arguing about AJ to visit. She and Emily hadn’t even gone to school.

Once AJ had gone home, he’d locked himself in his room to avoid the family. Emily and Elizabeth spent all their time waiting for Jason to wake up. Emily had gone to the cafeteria to get them something to eat when Jason had awakened. He’d been groggy and hadn’t known where he was. Elizabeth had left to get a nurse, but before she could go back in, her father had shown up and dragged her home. She couldn’t leave her room for nearly a week. For the first time, he’d hit in her the face and it was six days before makeup would hide it enough. The first chance she’d gotten, she’d returned to the hospital. AJ had agreed to go to rehab at that point and was saying goodbye to Jason. He was the first person Elizabeth had seen and told her the news. She hadn’t believed him and gone into the room. Jason vaguely recalled that she’d been in the room when he’d woken up, but other than he didn’t know her.

“You okay?”

Jason’s questions startled Elizabeth back to the present. She’d finished her burger by that point. She met his eyes and weakly smiled. “Sorry, I must have zoned out.”

“If you’re tired-”

She shook her head. “No. I don’t need a lot of sleep anyway.” She tossed the Styrofoam box into the trash. “I’d better get back to this.”

Jason frowned. “Did I say something wrong?”

“What?” she asked, tilting her head to the side, “Why?”

“Well, we were having a civil conversation and you zoned out.” He hesitated, “Everything all right?”

Elizabeth bit her lip. “I was just thinking about the accident. The two weeks following it were crazy, you know. Emily and I skipped a week of school, AJ went to rehab, your family went to hell…” she trailed off and shrugged. “It was just a really bad time.”

Jason tossed his own box out. “You were the first person I saw when I woke up. I still remember that.”

“Emily and I spent that first week in the hospital,” Elizabeth replied quietly, “Literally. AJ was there the first three days, so we’d switch off. I’d spend an hour with AJ, she’d be with you. Then we’d trade.” She rubbed her eyes. “I don’t remember sleeping that much. A few hours a night, mainly on one of those really uncomfortable hospital chairs. The nurses kept telling us to go home, but if we had, you two would have been alone. Lila was too upset to come to hospital and Ned was spending a lot time trying to make sure AJ wasn’t going to get arrested. Edward, Alan and Monica were fighting constantly. They were barely at the hospital. So Em and I stayed.” She sighed. “AJ left and locked himself in his room. He promised us he wasn’t going to do anything stupid. He just needed to think. I guess it was good because he ended up deciding to go to rehab. Once he was gone, Emily tried to convince me to go home at night, saying if I went one night, she’d go the next. I didn’t want to go home.” She looked away.

“She went to the cafeteria to grab some lunch and I stayed with you. I was reading something and I felt your hand move.” Elizabeth smiled. “I’d never been so happy in my life than when you opened your eyes. I left to get a nurse but my father came to take me home before I could come back in.” She looked away. She hadn’t talked that much about the accident with anyone else but Emily.

“You didn’t come back for a long time,” Jason said. She met his eyes. “I kept asking where you were. Well, not you specifically. But the girl who’d been in the room when I woke up.”

She bit her lip. “I was being grounded. I had skipped school, hadn’t told my parents where I was and I hadn’t come home in a week. It was six days before I could come back.” She sighed. “Look, I really should try and get more done.”

“You look tired,” Jason observed. “Maybe you should head home.”

“I wouldn’t get much sleep,” Elizabeth said. “I’m better off trying to get work done.”

“You don’t want to go to sleep, do you?”

She looked at the desk and closed her eyes. “Jason-” Elizabeth shook her head. “You’re right. I don’t. I haven’t had a panic attack like that since I was thirteen and I’m not in any hurry to experience it again.”

He hesitated but forced himself to ask. “How did you calm down the first time?”

She opened her eyes and blinked back the tears. “You woke me up and calmed me down,” she admitted.

“You’re not going to tell me what happened are you?” he asked.

She shook her head and wiped her eyes with a napkin. “No. I can’t.”

He nodded, trying to hide his frustration. “You know I just want to help, right?”

Elizabeth didn’t answer at first. She started shutting down her computer. When the screen went black, she finally turned and met his eyes. “I know. But I can’t let you.”

“Why?” Jason asked. “You said you trusted me.”

“I do trust you.” She grabbed the printouts and put them into a folder. “I just can’t let you take care of this again. Because I would depend on you too much and I can’t do that again.” Elizabeth stood. “I’m going home.”

“I’ll give you a ride,” he said, standing. He put the chair back.

“On your bike?” Elizabeth asked.

“Yeah, is that a problem?” Jason replied.

She shrugged. “I’ve never been on a motorcycle.”

“Come on. There’s a first time for everything.”

Elizabeth smiled. “All right. Let’s go.”

This entry is part 5 of 29 in the Surviving the Past

Emily jumped up from her seat as Sonny, Carly and Jason rushed into the ER.

“What happened?” Sonny demanded.

Emily was in tears. “I don’t know. I was going to get a drink of water and I heard weird sounds coming from her r-room.” Emily swiped at her eyes. “I went into the room and God, Sonny, her eyes were bulging practically out of her and she couldn’t breathe. She looked so scared.”

“What would cause her to do that?” Carly asked. She looked between her husband and Emily frantically.

Emily shook her head. “I don’t know.”

A doctor came out then. “Elizabeth Webber’s family?”

“That’s us, Doctor,” Sonny said, striding forward.

“I’m Dr. Scanlon. Your sister?” Sonny nodded and Dr. Scanlon continued. “Elizabeth was having a panic attack. We’ve been able to stabilize her breathing, but she’s still very tense. The paramedics said she was calling for Jason. Is that you?”

Sonny seems stunned. He turned to look at Jason who looked confused. Emily gasped.

“Of course,” she whispered. Elizabeth had been talking about her father and the nightmares…she must have had one. Of course she’d call out for Jason. She probably always had. Emily’s eyes filled with tears.

“No,” Sonny said finally, his voice quiet. “Does she want to see Jason?”

Dr. Scanlon’s confused eyes swept the group, “Actually, yes, if he can calm her down.”

“Sonny,” Jason said. “I don’t know…”

“Jase,” Emily said quietly. She put a hand on his arm. “Please.”

Jason took a deep breath, “All right.”

Elizabeth was sleeping when Jason was shown into the section where they were keeping her. Her face was tense and it looked like she was having a bad dream. Jason felt kind of stupid, but sighed and took her hand.

“Hey, Elizabeth.”

“Jason?” she whispered. Her eyes were still closed and he could tell she was still sleeping. “He’s coming.”

Jason frowned. “Who’s coming?”

“He’s gonna hurt me.” Her voice was small and sounded scared. Jason was confused. “Stop him, Jason.”

“It’s okay,” he said, feeling more and more bewildered. Did this have anything to do with the difficult time he’d helped her with? “No one’s going to hurt you.”

“He said you weren’t going to help me anymore.” She whimpered. “He’s coming closer…”

Jason stroked her hair. “Shhh, I’m here. He can’t hurt you.”

Finally, Elizabeth’s forehead smoothed and she seemed to fall into a more relaxing sleep. Jason sighed and looked up. Sonny was standing at the edge.

“Who is she talking about?” Sonny asked tensely.

Jason shrugged. He tried to remove his hand from her grasp but she just tightened her grip. “I have no idea. She told me tonight that before the accident I’d helped her through something. I think this has something to do with it.”

“She’s holding to you like there’s no tomorrow,” Sonny observed.

“I just wish I knew how to help her. I mean, we just called a truce earlier and now…” Jason sighed, “I don’t know what to do, Sonny.”

“Well, until she lets go, you can’t do anything.” Sonny looked around. “I’ll go find some chairs. I think Liz owes us some explanations.”

Emily appeared behind the curtain. “Don’t push her, Sonny.”

Sonny turned. “You know what’s going on?”

Emily nodded miserably, “Yeah. And she doesn’t owe anyone anything. Don’t push her, Sonny. You wouldn’t want someone doing that to you.”

“Yeah, you’re right,” Sonny replied. “I’m just worried. I didn’t know anything was wrong.”

“Neither did I until today,” Emily replied quietly. “She’s good at hiding things. The only person who ever saw through her was…” Emily trailed off, her gaze landing on Jason.

“Jason Quartermaine,” Jason finished. “I didn’t realize they were that close.”

“They were,” Emily said looking away. “Closer than I thought.”

“I’m going to find some chairs,” Sonny said. He turned to Emily, “Why don’t you take Carly back to the Towers?”

Emily sighed, “Yeah, I probably should.” She disappeared with Sonny, leaving Jason and Elizabeth alone.

He covered her hand with his other one. “I don’t know what’s going on, Elizabeth. But I wish you’d tell me. I want to help.”

—-

“….want to help…”

—-

“You know better than to talk back to your mother…you know what that means, Lizzie.”

—-

“Your mother seems to think you’re sneaking out. Where are you going, Lizzie?”

“Hey, Elizabeth. What’s wrong?”

“You t-told me if it got to be too much…”

“Come in. You’ll catch a cold sitting on the roof.”

—-

“You’re the only person who understands, Jason. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“Well, you’ll never have to find out.”

“You promise you won’t leave me?”

“I’ll never leave you.”

“Beth…Jason’s been in an accident.”

“Is he…is he okay?”

“He’s in a coma.”

—–

“What do you mean he doesn’t remember anything?”

“He doesn’t remember anything, Liz.”

“You’re joking, AJ. That’s so cruel. Tell me the truth.”

“He doesn’t remember us, Liz.”

“Hey, Jason.”

“Who are you?”

“You got another F, Lizzie. Why won’t you learn?”

Elizabeth jerked straight up and started gasping for air. Jason sat on the edge of the bed.

“Hey, Elizabeth., hey, it’s me, Jason. Hey, it’s okay. You’re okay. It’s just me.” Jason gripped her hands trying to make her focus on him. Her breathing started to even out and her eyes lost that glazed look.

“Jason?” she whispered. She looked around. “What’s going on?”

“Shhh, calm down, you’re at the hospital. You had a panic attack and they brought you here.”

Elizabeth flushed. “What are you doing here?”

“Well,” Jason hesitated. “You asked for me.”

“Oh.” She was mortified. She tried to take her hands from him. “Sorry.”

He kept a tight grip. “What’s going on Elizabeth?” He locked eyes with her. “Why did I know how to calm you down?”

“What?” she asked, confused.

“I knew just what to say. I didn’t even think about it. It just came out,” Jason said, mystified.

Elizabeth’s eyes teared, “You always did,” she whispered. She looked away.

“Have I done this before?” he asked.

She nodded. “I used to have nightmares every night,” she said softly. “They got so bad I was afraid to go sleep so I used to climb out my window and go to your house. You’d let me in and I’d stay with you.”

“What are the nightmares about?” Jason asked.

Elizabeth let out a little cry. “I can’t tell you,” she said, shaking her head. “I told you once, but you went away and you never came back. I know I’m gonna blink and this will all be over.”

“I’m not going to leave.”

She kept shaking her head. “You said that before and you left.” She started to cry and Jason wrapped his arms around her. “You left anyway and you never came back. This is all just a dream. You’re not back.” She hugged him anyway. She didn’t know the next time she’d dream about Jason Quartermaine being back and saving her from a nightmare and have it feel so real.

“Listen, Elizabeth. I helped you once and I want to again. Please, let me,” he whispered into her ear.

“I let you once, but when you left there was no one to protect me from the nightmares,” she whispered, clutching at the back of his shirt. “I’m not gonna do it again.”

“Hey, you know, you’re awake,” he said, pulling away to look in her eyes. “I’m not Jason Quartermaine, you know that?”

She clamped her lips together. “I know. You’re Jason Morgan and you hate me.”

“I think you’re getting yourself worked out,” Jason said gently. “I don’t hate you.”

“Yes you do.” She let go of him and hugged herself. “You love Emily and AJ. You let them back in but you kept me out. ”

“I’m sorry,” Jason said. “Please. You can trust me.”

She hugged her knees to her chest. “I only trusted one person and you don’t remember him, so-”

“I got the chairs,” Sonny said, reentering. “Hey, Liz you’re awake. Are you okay?”

Elizabeth curled up in a ball and kept crying. Sonny shot a look at Jason.

“What’s going on?” he asked.

Jason shrugged. “I don’t know. She woke up and I think she’s confused. She’s going between reality and the past right now. She can’t seem to decide if I’m Jason Quartermaine or Jason Morgan. Either way, I just want to help.”

“Well,” Sonny said, putting the chair down. “Sit. And we’ll wait for her to wake up.”

The next morning dawned. Elizabeth was expected to come home that afternoon. She’d slept the rest of the night peacefully and had woken up early that morning, feeling a little embarrassed. She’d apologized to Jason for her outburst and had refused to tell Jason or Sonny anything.

Emily showered and left the apartment after getting a call from Sonny. She headed for the Quartermaine mansion and didn’t even bother with the front door. She went straight to the rose garden where she knew Lila had breakfast every morning.

“Emily!” Lila said as Emily came into view.

“Grandmother,” Emily said, kissing her cheek. “How are you?”

“It’s lonely here, darling.” Lila sighed. “How I miss seeing you and Elizabeth sitting in the garden doing your homework.”

Emily’s eyes swept the garden. “Some of my best memories are out here with Beth, AJ and Jason,” she smiled, “and you or Reginald chasing after us with a camera.”

Lila laughed. “Darling, I have so many lovely memories myself. And Elizabeth is like family.”

Emily sighed. “Yeah, I know.”

“What’s wrong, dear?” Lila asked.

Emily smiled, “Can’t get anything past you.” She hesitated. “Do you remember when Beth was young…did her father seem….a little um…” Emily trailed off.

“Are you talking about the times when Elizabeth snuck in Jason’s window?” Lila asked.

Emily’s eyes widened. “How did you know about that?”

“Jason needed someone to talk to. He was so angry, darling, and he couldn’t let Elizabeth see that. He’d promised not to tell you or your brother. So he’d talk to me.”

“Beth told me yesterday,” Emily said. “And last night she had a panic attack and the only person that could calm her down was Jason.” She shook head. “How did I miss seeing Beth was in pain? I don’t understand how I didn’t see it.”

“She didn’t want you to, dear. And our Elizabeth is very good at hiding what she feels.” Lila sighed. “I’m only grateful she at least let Jason in.”

“And then she lost him,” Emily whispered. “I can’t imagine what’s been like these past few years, watching the person who’d been there for her forming new relationships with everyone but her.” She sighed. “Grandmother, I feel so helpless. Jason knew exactly what to say to her last night. Sonny told me on the phone that she woke up again last night, barely able to breathe and that Jason calmed her down in no time. Why couldn’t I do that?” Emily said, crossed her arms.

“Darling, I know that Jason doesn’t consciously remember helping Elizabeth, but I suppose part of him still does.”

Emily sighed. “I guess he did have a lot of practice. It must be second nature.”

“You know, there was a time when I thought that Elizabeth might fall for our Jason.”

Emily smiled. “Oh, Grandmother, that time is still very much in the present.”

Lila grinned, “Really, darling. Have you got a plan?”

Emily wanted to jump and down in excitement. “Does that mean you’d want to help?”

Lila took Emily’s hand, “Anything to make Elizabeth and Jason happy.”

—-

Emily stepped off the elevator, elated from her visit with her grandmother. That brought the total of supporters to five. As she neared her apartment, she paused. Jason was waiting out front – and he didn’t look happy.

“Hey,” she said. She noted the fact he was still wearing the same clothes from yesterday. “Did you spend the night at the hospital?”

“Yeah.” Jason ran a hand through his hair. “Em, I need some answers.”

Emily shook her head. “I can’t tell you anything, you know that.”

“Emily, she had a nightmare right there in the hospital and when she woke up, I knew exactly how to calm her down. Why? What happened that makes her so terrified to sleep?” Jason demanded.

Emily crossed her arms and looked away. “I can’t tell you, Jason. She doesn’t want you to know and she is the only person that can tell you.”

“She told me she used to sneak into my room at night,” Jason said. “That when it got too bad, she came to me. Now, I don’t remember that and I know that hurts her, but I can’t help if no one tells me what’s going on.”

Emily shook her head. “No. I won’t break her trust. It took her years to tell me. I want to tell you, believe me. But Jason, Beth-”

“Will never tell me,” Jason finished. He exhaled slowly, frustrated. “All right. Will you tell her that Sonny wants to her to come by the warehouse today?”

“He’s not gonna push her, is he?” Emily asked, warily.

Jason shook his head. “No. I think he wanted to talk about some project she’s doing. He’s going to wait for Elizabeth to come to him.”

“All right,” Emily agreed. “I’ll tell her. Go home, get a shower, all right?”

“Are you trying to tell me I smell?” Jason asked.

Emily grinned. “Can you take the hint?” she teased.

Carly flipped through her calendar. She was tired—she’d didn’t get any sleep after she and Emily had returned from the hospital. She’d tossed and turned all night trying to understand what was wrong with Elizabeth. She wished that Elizabeth had come to her.

It was obvious that there was something between Elizabeth and Jason. Carly wasn’t sure if it happened before the accident or after, but something was there. Elizabeth had asked for Jason – someone that she’d told Carly over and over that she couldn’t stand.

Carly rubbed her eyes. Well, the plan to make them be friends was more important now than ever. Elizabeth obviously needed Jason in her life and Carly loved Elizabeth like a sister and she’d do anything for her.

“Mrs. Corinthos, the Port Charles Hotel has called back. They’d like to set a date for the launch party,”
her assistant Elton’s voice came through the intercom.

Carly took a deep breath and pressed the button. “Elton, tell them I need the next available day.”

“They said they have an opening in three weeks, on June 20.”

“Can we be ready in that amount of time?” Carly asked, the wheels in her head already turning.

“With me planning it? Of course, Mrs. Corinthos, shall I tell them to book us?”

“Yes, Elton. Tell them.” Carly sat back in her chair. The company was launching the new Face of Deception and Carly had a feeling the party could be the first step in making Elizabeth and Jason see each other as more than friends.

Which meant she, Emily and Nikolas had three weeks to help Jason and Elizabeth become friends.

toomanyI hadn’t planned on posting another chapter of A Few Words Too Many today, but I hit such a great stride writing it last night that I wanted to celebrate a little 😛 I’ve finished the first parts of the story (which equal together, seventeen chapters) and only have seven left to write, so I may be peppering some extra chapters in every once in a while.

I also posted a new layout, but I’m not sure how much I like it. I’ll leave it around for a bit, but I may change my mind.

daughtersI plan to update again later with some site things and more chapters of Surviving the Past, so I’ll update this page at that point. Here are the additions so far:

Chapter Seven of A Few Words Too Many
Chapter Eight of Daughters

Later Update:

– Chapters 5-8 of Surviving the Past

And the last group of completed short stories from Liason Underground, so all the lost stories I currently have access to are now on this site.

Good Intentions (April 28, 2003 Episode Tag)
See You Later (Pic Fic Entry)
Left Behind (October 6, 2002 rewrite)
Just A Switch – No Goddamn idea what this is, but it’s here now.
Distrust (September 2003 Episode Tag)
Home for Christmas (AU song fiction)

Second Late Update:

I’m starting to merge The Lost Stories in their Short Stories category, specifically the General Short Stories and Episode Tags, which now have their own page. Also found one last 2006 short story located from my old board, set during the paternity mess I want to hurt very badly. So Mirrors is now located here.

This entry is part 7 of 24 in the A Few Words Too Many

It’s down to this
I’ve got to make this life make sense
Can anyone tell what I’ve done
I miss the life
I miss the colors of the world
Can anyone tell where I am?
Away From The Sun, 3 Doors Down

Saturday, May 24, 2003

Kelly’s: Dining Room

It was one of those unlucky days of the week when Penny’s school schedule forced Bobbie to schedule Courtney and Elizabeth on the quiet morning shift. Elizabeth was surprised by how the two of them had managed to co-exist for the last month. Of all the people who had raged and insulted her this last month, Courtney had been the only not to say anything to her face. Elizabeth would have preferred her anger—the quiet desperation the blonde utilized to pretend that nothing had changed made her guilt so much sharper.

But there were moments when Elizabeth felt completely in sync with Courtney, and it was standing behind the counter as a new pot of coffee brewed while Courtney organized a few receipts that they felt…almost united. The stares and whispers of their patrons were impossible to ignore, and Elizabeth could feel the heat of those eyes on her eye as she kept her eyes down.

“I hate them all,” Courtney hissed. “Look at them, watching us, hoping like hell I’ll go for your hair or something. It’s disgusting. They have nothing better to do than comment on our lives.” She flicked her blue eyes to Elizabeth, and Elizabeth was unsurprised at the anger burning there. “I hate you and I hate Jason for what you did to me. If he wanted to be with you, he should have just left me instead of cheating, and maybe you think I deserved having it done to me because I know you think I went after him last fall—”

“Courtney, no,” Elizabeth said softly. “No, it’s not—”

“But I’ll be damned if my private life is going to be on display,” Courtney cut in. “So this…” She gestured at the space between them. “This is a neutral zone. We’re going to do our jobs and confuse the shit out of everyone else. But outside this restaurant, Elizabeth, I want you to cross the street when you see me and I hope like I hell I’ve found a better job once your bastard begins to show.”

She grabbed a pot of the now finished coffee and went onto the floor to serve. Elizabeth sighed and rubbed her eyes. When the front door of Kelly’s opened to reveal Nadine coming in with a smile for her, she felt her own mouth curving into a matching one. Since meeting her a few days earlier, she and Nadine had gone out to lunch twice. Francis had been nervous about escorting Elizabeth to Eli’s both times because it was inherently insecure, but Elizabeth had craved the normalcy.

“Good morning,” Nadine all but sang out as she sat down. “Green tea if it’s available.” Elizabeth flipped her mug over and poured it, setting a tea bag next to it. “Do you have a break coming soon? I have to head to work in a half hour.”

“I’m due for fifteen minutes soon, but…” Elizabeth hesitated. “It’s just me and Courtney today, and I always hate asking her. It’s…hard enough.”

“Oh, the other woman,” Nadine murmured. She flicked her eyes to the doors where the blonde had disappeared into the kitchen. “Well, yeah, I figure.”

“But I’m entitled to one and she literally just declared this restaurant a neutral zone.” Elizabeth glanced over as Courtney reappeared and joined them behind the counter. “It’s slow. So I’m going to take my fifteen.”

“Sure. Whatever.”

Elizabeth poured herself a cup of tea and gestured towards the courtyard. “Let’s go outside. It’s gorgeous out.”

“Sure thing.” As they walked out of the restaurant, Elizabeth saw Francis out of the corner of her eye, standing up and following them.

As they sat down at one of the empty tables, Nadine watched Francis head to the courtyard entrance to take his position. “You know, you don’t have to worry about me being uncomfortable with your guards.”

Elizabeth sighed and stirred sugar into her tea. “I’m lucky that Jason assigned me familiar faces, and it’s not so bad. But I know people look at me weird—”

“No, seriously.” Nadine hesitated. “Look, the reason I stopped by this morning is because I heard from my jerk ex-boyfriend, and I realized this might be something we can totally bond over.” She met Elizabeth’s eyes. “Have you ever heard of Anthony Zacchara?”

Elizabeth blinked and tilted her head. She tried to keep up on the people in Jason’s world, always worried for his safety, but the name was only vaguely familiar. “Somewhat, but not really.”

“Well, he lives and works out of Crimson Pointe,” Nadine explained, referring to a small town outside of New York City. “But his son Johnny lives in Manhattan.” She bit her lip. “We dated for almost a year.”

Elizabeth raised her eyebrows in surprise. “I wouldn’t have guessed.”

“I’m not proud of it, but Johnny was never involved in his father’s business. At least, not when we met.” Nadine flushed and looked away. “He was an investor in a medical clinic I was working at, and he flirted with me. He has a great smile, and he’s wickedly charming.” She closed her eyes. “And things were amazing for six months.”

“And then?” Elizabeth prompted.

“And then, his father had a stroke,” Nadine continued. “And Johnny’s sister and his dad’s lawyer kept trying to get him involved. Johnny was torn because he thought he had a duty to keep his sister out of things, but he still didn’t really want to do anything.”

“But he did,” Elizabeth guessed and Nadine nodded. “Is that why you broke up?”

“I wish, because at least I could have walked away with some good memories, but Johnny never does anything in half-measures.” She blew out an exasperated breath. “I guess he figured I wasn’t going to stick around, or maybe he was tired of me. It’s hard to know why because the lousy bastard never says anything. He just…he wouldn’t call for days at a time, and he stopped talking to me about a future. I hadn’t even really broached anything, but we’d…discussed moving in together.” Nadine sipped her tea. “And that all just stopped. He stopped being this amazing man and turned into this complete asshole who didn’t call, didn’t come over, but got angry every time I asked him why he was pulling away. I couldn’t deal with it anymore, so I broke up with him and found a new job.”

“Nadine, I’m so sorry.” Elizabeth reached over and squeezed her hand. “That must have been so difficult. I know what it’s like to be with someone who is absolutely incredible one day, and the next, it’s like you never knew him at all.”

“Anyway, he called me which pissed me off because I really didn’t want him to know where I was.” She huffed. “He told me I left some CDs at his place and did I want them. I told him he could throw them out a window, himself along with them.” She shook her head. “I was just so annoyed, and then I realized that I hadn’t mentioned I was connected to the Zaccharas, even a little, which I know enough about this world to understand that if I’m not upfront with it, it may come up later and you’ll wonder why I never said anything.”

“I appreciate it, Nadine, I really do.” Elizabeth smiled. “Honesty is great, and you’re right, if I didn’t know it now, I might have been upset later simply because…” She stared down at her hands. “I’ve learned the hard way to wonder about people and their motives.”

“You know, Elizabeth, I get we’ve known each other for five minutes,” Nadine said hesitantly, “but you really can talk to me.”

“I would if I thought it make a difference to talk about it, but trust me, Nadine,” Elizabeth leaned back in her chair and sighed, “verbalizing the crappy choices I’ve made only makes me feel worse about them, so it’s better if I just…don’t. For now.”

“No problem.” Nadine checked her watch. “I better get to the hospital and you better get in before the other woman comes out here.”

“Technically, I think I’m supposed to be other woman,” Elizabeth said, with a smile she wouldn’t have expected. Nadine shrugged.

“Yeah, but who cares about technicalities?” Her breezy smile and light hug before she left gave Elizabeth the strength to head back and complete the last four hours of her shift.

General Hospital: Monica Quartermaine’s Office

Monica smiled brightly when she opened her door and let Jason enter. “I didn’t believe Margo when she told me you were out here, but here you are.” She gestured to the sofa. “Sit, sit. Tell me what brings you around the hospital.”

Jason sighed, but did so because this visit was going to be difficult enough without making it more complicated. “I wanted to talk to you and hope that you could talk to the family for me.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I know you and Alan have…” He didn’t want to say harassed or bothered, but he was sure the characterization wasn’t too far off. “I guess you heard that Elizabeth and I are…that is, we’re…” He exhaled shortly, hoping she would take his difficulty as not liking to speak to the Quartermaines about his personal life rather the difficulty in saying these words out loud. “That she’s pregnant.”

Monica smiled, almost sheepishly. “We have. And I know that we might have come on too strong with Elizabeth. We just…” She spread her hands out. “We like her so much, Jason, and I was so sorry when things didn’t work out for you two last summer.”

He closed his eyes and hoped for the strength to get through this, to say words that weren’t true and some that he wouldn’t mind if they were, and not have it all seem like a jumbled mess. “I know….but…it’s not…” He paused. “We’re not really together right now. I mean, we’re not…”

“Jason, it’s okay, you don’t have to explain yourself to me.” Monica hesitantly reached out and covered one of his hands with hers. “You and Elizabeth will figure this out for yourselves.”

“I…it just came at a difficult time and it’s not the way I would have wanted to do it,” he said, knowing those words, at least, were the honest truth. “I hurt Courtney when I didn’t want to, and I haven’t been as supportive to Elizabeth as I should have been.”

He knew she was wondering why he was telling her these things, but Jason knew that his mother would immediately tell Alan, and somehow it would travel the hospital grapevine that Elizabeth had his support and that he knew her child to be his. “And maybe you heard some rumors—”

“I don’t pay attention to rumors like that,” Monica shook her head firmly. “The ones accusing Elizabeth of picking the richer man. I know her better than that, and I know you better than that. So don’t you worry about that. I told Amy Vining so myself, and I saw Carly complaining about how people were badmouthing you to Bobbie.”

Jason closed his eyes, annoyed Carly had helped despite his best efforts. She was right, he was going to have to do more to act like the father of this child, but he just…

He knew that he was going to find Ric and deal with him. And when Elizabeth was safe, she could take her baby and herself and walk out of his life again. He couldn’t imagine why she’d stay now when she never had before.

“Thank you.” Jason hesitated. “And if you could talk to Emily. She’s been very angry at Elizabeth, and it upsets her that her best friend is treating her that way.”

“I can try, Jason, but…” Monica sighed. “Emily’s stubborn and she may not listen.” She took a chance and rested her hand on his shoulder. “I’m sure Courtney is very nice, but can I say again how much I really do like Elizabeth. I know it’s wrong, but I like that she’s separate from Sonny.”

Jason blinked at her and shook his head. “I don’t—”

“Robin was close to Stone and Sonny,” Monica said slowly, “and Carly ended up with Sonny. Courtney is Sonny’s sister, so the women you’ve been involved with seriously up until now have always been…connected to Sonny.” Jason tensed, but Monica continued. “I just…I like that Elizabeth is something—someone—separate. That you met her away from Sonny, and she’s yours in a way that no one else has been.”

Jason exhaled slowly and looked away. Monica was right of course—Elizabeth was only connected to Sonny now because of him. Because he had cared for her, and Ric Lansing had utilized those emotions to gain leverage against his half-brother. Was that why he and Elizabeth had never worked outside the studio, outside their own world? Because she was so separate from everyone else in his life that he’d been unable to find a balance?

“I’m sorry, Jason, I don’t always know when to shut up and stop pushing,” Monica said, her face stricken. “I just want you to be happy.”

“I know.” Jason squeezed her hand on top of his. “I’m trying to be. I just wanted you to know what was going on.”

“Thank you.” Monica smiled but wagged a finger at him. “Now you take care of Elizabeth and see that her blood pressure stays down.” When he only looked at her blankly, her cheeks flushed. “I may have…asked your father to keep track of Elizabeth’s charts. Just to…” She cleared her throat. “Her blood pressure was elevated at the last two visits. If Dr. Lee sees it again next month, she may put Elizabeth on bed rest.”

“I’ll make sure she takes care of herself,” Jason said, worried and filled with guilt that he had avoided Elizabeth for so long. He stood. “But if you could stop looking up Elizabeth’s chart, I’d appreciate it.”

“Right, of course.” Monica stood, embarrassed. “I just…I’m concerned. I have one grandchild I’m unlikely to know, I suppose I just…wanted…” She trailed off.

“I’ll ask Elizabeth to keep you informed of any changes,” Jason said, because he didn’t know what else to say. There was little chance Sonny or Carly would ever allow Michael to know the Quartermaines Jason actually liked, and this child…

This child was unlikely to be in his life long enough to matter.

No Name Restaurant: Back Room

Sonny leaned back in his chair, knowing that Johnny and Milo were behind him. He hated meeting the representatives from the other Families on the East Coast, but he’d promised Jason that he’d do whatever it took to keep Elizabeth safe.

He glanced at Sammy Tagliatti, from Philadelphia, whom he loathed for his lack of respect to Carly the previous fall and to the other men, whom he rarely saw. Anthony Zacchara, who controlled most of lower New York, Hector Ruiz from Miami and Daniel Vega from Boston. In fact, now that Sonny reflected upon it—he hated all these men. Ruthless bastards willing to do anything to survive with little consideration for collateral damage.

“Well, Corinthos, I suppose you’re finally deigning to confirm the rumors we’ve been hearing for almost a month,” Daniel Vega remarked, sipping from a tumbler of Scotch.

“I am,” Sonny nodded. He looked to Anthony Zacchara, and the man standing behind him. “But since this is the first time we’ve met since last fall, we should congratulate Zacchara on his recovery.”

Anthony Zacchara scowled. “Like you give a damn—”

“And ask why his lawyer’s son slithered into my town without mentioning his connection you or to my mother.” Sonny looked at Trevor Lansing, who blanched slightly. “Or were we going to pretend that the man who embezzled from Vega and Ruiz wasn’t connected to you?”

Both men eyed the older man with mixtures of suspicion and loathing. “Were you behind this attack?” Ruiz snarled. Sonny smirked, knowing that Ruiz had two of the most lethal and dangerous sons in the business.

“No,” Trevor said immediately and Anthony glared at him, as if for daring to speak. “I’m sorry, Anthony, but I gotta tell them Richard and I don’t speak. We’ve had no contact since he graduated law school.” He smoothed a hand down his tie and met Sonny’s eyes. “And I know what we’re here to discuss. I have no objections.”

“We’ll be keeping our eye on you,” Tagliatti murmured. “But, Corinthos, where is Jason Morgan? Should he not be here to relate the happy news?”

“Jason’s busy protecting his family,” Sonny said carelessly. “Ric Lansing came after his ex-girlfriend because of the connection, he came after my wife to gain leverage. We’re just lucky Elizabeth saw through his act.”

“Did she?” Ruiz murmured, raising an eyebrow. “I have heard stories to the contrary.”

“It’s true that like the rest of us,” Sonny stressed, “Elizabeth was initially taken in by Lansing. But she was upset and hurt. She and Jason had broken up. They both made mistakes, but they have worked out their differences, mostly because Jason learned Ric was targeting the woman he loves and put aside what broke them apart.” He raised an eyebrow. “They’re having a child and Ric has threatened that child because he’s angry Elizabeth threw him over and went back to Jason.”

“Does that sound like the son you raised?” Tagliatti demanded of Trevor. “Would he go after a woman just because she left him?”

Trevor arched an eyebrow. “Richard isn’t known for subtlety. He hates Corinthos because his mother chose him rather than my son to raise. He blames him for her death.” His eyes hardened. “As do I.”

“But why should we waste our resources looking for this man?” Vega cut in. “It’s over a woman. A paltry thing, really. If she was reckless enough to get involved with him, shouldn’t she deserve everything she gets—”

He was glad he’d told Jason he would handle this alone because it was likely Jason would have found it difficult not to react to such a response. “This woman,” Sonny repeated, “has been nothing but loyal to me and Jason for years. When Moreno’s men shot Jason, she kept him alive. When Sorel put a bomb in her apartment, she did not go to the police with what she knew. When I needed Jason in town to investigate a traitor that was disrupting our profits,” he said to Tagliatti and Zacchara, whose territories were often intertwined with his own, “Elizabeth hid him in her apartment without a word to anyone. She has been kidnapped by Roscoe’s men, shot at by Alcazar’s goons and now, because she made the mistake of trusting a man that the rest of you trusted as well, you think I should leave her to the dogs?”

Ruiz sat back in his chair and nodded. “Loyal women are hard to find,” he admitted. He glanced at Zacchara, who had notoriously shot his own wife during one his rages. “And sometimes, harder to keep since they expect so much of you.” He cleared his throat. “Ric Lansing stole much money from me, and for this, I would like to see him roasted over a pit of coals, but I also do not like what I hear about threatening a pregnant woman. It’s…uncouth. I’ve had to reprimand my own sons when they’ve strayed from honorable actions.”

“I hate Ric Lansing as much as the rest of you,” Vega said. “I don’t care much for this woman and looking for him in order to protect her doesn’t appeal much to me. Her protection is not my concern. However, I find Faith Roscoe to be a boil on humanity. If she is working with him, then I think it’s for the good of the business that we exterminate them both.”

“I don’t much enjoy things that cut into my profits,” Tagliatti said. “And there’s no doubt Lansing and Roscoe did so.” He flicked his dark eyes to Zacchara, the last of the four men. “But will Zacchara agree to hunt down his lawyer’s son?”

“I got no problem with hunting down scum, but Ric Lansing ain’t come for me and mine,” Anthony snarled. “He didn’t take money from me and I got no sympathy for women who curl up to dangerous men and then cry about it later.”

Sonny tensed, but he knew Anthony Zacchara well enough to know what to say. “But, perhaps, as a sign of good faith that you weren’t involved in his plans,” he said softly. “You might consider offering your help. Your resources.”

Anthony narrowed his eyes. “I’m always one to preserve the peace,” he replied with a malicious smile. “Sure. You got my vote.”

“Well, that settles it.” Vega tossed back the rest of his Scotch. “Ric Lansing and Faith Roscoe are to be executed upon sight.”

Elizabeth Webber’s Studio

 

There was a knock on her door before Cody opened it. “Jason’s here to see you, Miss Webber.” Elizabeth frowned and looked at him oddly. She hadn’t had many visitors since this debacle began, but none of the guards had ever announced anyone. “Do you want him to come in?” His face was impassive, but there was a slight clenching in his jaw and suddenly she realized what was going on.

Jason had been by exactly twice since putting twenty-four protection on her, and the guards had had to take her to the doctor’s appointments and everywhere else. Elizabeth had embarrassed Cody last week by crying on the way home, showing off the sonogram of her child that was now framed on the table. Francis looked annoyed every time someone said something to her, and she knew he’d started the routine of coming into Kelly’s during her shift rather than being in the courtyard.

They were protecting her from being hurt, and clearly, they perceived Jason as a threat. Touched, but disturbed at the same time, Elizabeth set down the sketchbooks she had been stowing in a carton and shoved a stand of hair behind her ear. “Cody, Jason can come in any time he wants.” A smile tugged at her lips. “But thanks for checking.”

Jason was scowling slightly as Cody finally moved from the doorway and let him in. “I have had enough of this,” he muttered.

“Sorry…” Elizabeth dipped her chin, embarrassed. “Cody…he saw me crying last week after my appointment and I guess…” She shrugged. “You know, they don’t understand…” She bit her lip. “I had my first ultrasound and I had no one to show it to except my doctor and my nurse, so when Cody asked how my appointment went, I was just…” She stopped, realizing he looked irritated. “I’m sorry, that’s not why you’re here. Did something happen? I don’t…I don’t want to keep you.”

“I came to apologize,” Jason said, but her heart sank. She suspected that Sonny had said something after the medical history fiasco or maybe one of her guards had let their own annoyance slip.

“No, Jason…” Elizabeth stepped forward. “Please. I-I know that there are some people who might…I’m sure Sonny said something about you not…” Feeling awkward, she wrapped her arms around herself. “I never told anyone I expected you to be involved, and I am so sorry if anyone—”

“That’s not…” Jason rested his hands at his waist, looked down and took a deep breath. “Yeah, Sonny and Carly don’t think I’m doing enough, and I can’t get a read on whether Carly actually knows or just suspects, but she read me the riot act.”

Elizabeth sighed and started to rake her hands through hair, tugging out the messy ponytail. “This is a disaster.” For want of something to do so she didn’t have to look at him, she continued to pack up her sketchbooks, books and other miscellaneous papers. “I don’t know what we’re supposed to do about other people, how to manage their expectations.”

“You told me when we started this that I wasn’t thinking this through, and I…you were right.” Elizabeth blinked and turned to look at him. He scratched the back of his neck. “I didn’t think any further than protecting you, and I thought this would be the best way—”

“We can still change our minds,” she said softly. She stared down at the magazine in her hands, wondering why she wasn’t just tossing it away. “Maybe Ric and Faith are cutting their losses. You can—”

“Elizabeth, we just have…” He was quiet for a long moment. “We have to figure out how to do this without…complicating things.”

Logically she understood that the heart was a muscle, and that emotions came from the brain, but Elizabeth could feel the weight settle on her chest, could literally feel the ache spreading to her limbs. “You mean how to make people think you’re the father of my child without actually having to be the father of my child.” She closed her eyes and willed the tears to stay away. How could she not be out of tears? Why couldn’t she be one of those women who had problems with tear production?

“I…” When Jason’s voice faltered, she looked up and sighed. He looked helpless, as if he hadn’t wanted to say that but that it had been exactly what he meant.

“Jason,” Elizabeth said, turning back towards him. “The only way this is going to work is if we’re honest with each other. We have to lie to the rest of the world, we shouldn’t lie to each other. I can’t…” She paused, swallowing hard. “I can’t blame you if you don’t actually want to be involved, but if we were still friends, you’d be…” Elizabeth shrugged. “I don’t know, friends ask about health and how doctor’s appointments went and sometimes they go. For support.” When he said nothing to that, she bit her lip. “Or you just ask if I’m alive and once a year, we have lunch. I can’t help you with this, Jason, if you don’t talk to me.”

“I’m sorry, you’re right.” Jason lowered himself to the sofa. “I just…I don’t know how to do this. I know that Monica and Alan have been…overly interested in your case, so I talked to Monica about backing off.”

“Jason…” Elizabeth sighed. Trust Jason to warn away the only people remotely interested in her pregnancy, even if it was for the wrong reasons. “They weren’t really bothering me. They just…want to be connected to you.” She hesitated. “But I understand that you don’t want them to led on about a possible grandchild, so—”

“I told Monica that if they left you alone and stopped looking up your records, you’d be more likely to tell her what’s going on,” Jason interrupted.

“Oh my God.” Elizabeth sat next to him on the couch. “Jason, are you listening to yourself? You just promised your mother that I would keep her informed about a child you’re not raising!” She covered her face with her hands. “This is insane, Jason. It’s always been insane. And we cannot keep this up. We can’t.”

“We have to—”

She snapped her head up. “No, then I can’t. Do you understand this is so much worse than it was that December people thought we were sleeping together?” She dug the heels of her hands into her eyes. “We are lying to everyone, and it’s just not going to work, because we don’t know how this is going to play out. Jason, what if we never find Ric?”

“That’s…” Jason shook his head. “We can’t think like that—”

“I have to think like that.” Elizabeth felt like wrapping her hands around his throat because he just wasn’t getting it. “Jason, I need you to listen to me. I am pregnant. No matter who people think the father of this child is, I am having one. She is going to be here in six months. Do you get that? I am dodging your ex-girlfriend, your sister, your parents, and your best friends who are all judging me, all making my life a living hell in their own special ways. I am trying like hell to keep my head on straight, and you are making this impossible.”

Jason got to his feet and if she thought he was irritated before, now he was simply angry. “I’m making this impossible? Are you serious, Elizabeth? I have done nothing but look for Ric for the last month. I’ve barely slept!” He jabbed a finger at her. “I didn’t get us in this situation—”

“The hell you didn’t!” Elizabeth launched up, her ears ringing. “You decided I needed rescuing and told him I was having your child. This was your goddamned idea. I begged you to tell people the truth! I told you this wouldn’t work and you kept telling me you wouldn’t end up hating me!” Her voice broke on the last word, but she struggled to continue. “And you’re so angry at me because I got myself pregnant by a psychotic freak that you can barely stand to look at me!”

“That’s not…” Frustrated, he groaned and slid his hands into his hair, actually pulling at it. “Damn it, Elizabeth.”

“Well, I’m sorry, but I am drowning here. Everyone is angry at me, I get it. Everyone blames me. Well, I can’t change what happened. I don’t know what you want me to do. You won’t tell anyone the truth, and then you’re angry that people don’t think you’re stepping up.” She clenched her fists in front him. “And I am begging you to tell me what you want to do, because you’re not listening to me. Do you want to tell people the truth or do you just want to tell them that the baby is a mistake?” Tears slid down her cheeks. “You wouldn’t even be lying, because you do think that. You think my baby is a mistake, that maybe I’m too stupid to be a mother, that I don’t deserve to have a child—”

She stopped when he reached out and covered her clenched hands with his. “Just…just stop.” Jason lowered his head and took a deep breath. “You’re right. This isn’t going to work if we’re not honest with each other.”

“Okay.” Elizabeth nodded, taking a shaky breath.

“And Monica told me that your blood pressure has been high, that your doctor will want to put you on bed rest if it doesn’t come down, so let’s just…” He gently pushed her to sit down. “Let’s just stop arguing.”

“Okay.” Everything inside her ached, because she knew he was only being nice now because she’d been crying, because he was worried about her health. “Please, Jason, let’s just tell the truth, and try—”

“If Ric thinks this is my child, he may want to come after you as revenge, but he won’t be ruthless about it, not the way he would if he thought it was his own.” Jason hesitated. “He’d be relentless if he knew the truth, and that’s not a risk I’m willing to take. Are you?”

“No,” Elizabeth admitted.

“Okay. So we have to…we have to figure a way forward.” He stared at their joined hands. “I do not think your child is a mistake, Elizabeth, and I am so sorry if for one minute, you think I am blaming you in this situation, okay?” He tilted her chin up to look at him. “We have been so worried about protecting you and keeping this lie that we haven’t…you haven’t even been allowed to be happy. To think about becoming a mother.”

“My nurse asked me if I was excited last week and I started to cry,” she confessed. “Because it was the first time anyone had asked, and I hadn’t…I hadn’t thought about it until then.” She took a deep breath. “I wish that this were happening any other way, but I want…I want my child.” She felt her lips curve and looked away. “I want this baby so much, so if you tell me that this is the best way to keep her safe, I’ll agree.”

Jason let their hands fall away and he was quiet for a moment. “Sonny has already told the Families that this is my child, and gained their cooperation in hunting Ric and Faith down, so at this point…”

“We can’t change our minds,” Elizabeth murmured. “Because he lied to them.” She sighed. “Okay, well, there’s an argument I can’t dismiss. Sonny went to bat for me, we’ll have to make this work.”

“Let’s just…” Jason hesitated. “Let’s just take it one day at a time. I’ll go to some doctor’s appointments, and we’ll have lunch together in public a couple of times. You can tell Monica what’s going on, and I’ll try to keep Emily from arguing with you in public. Can that….can that be enough for now?”

The weight on her chest only grew heavier. If they had still been friends, truly friends, she would not have had to convince Jason to offer this type of support. He would have seen her struggling alone and done what he could to alleviate the stress. If he’d known being alone at the appointments would be difficult, he would have volunteered. He would met her for coffee without looking as though his arm was twisted.

She didn’t think he was going through all this trouble due to a sense of obligation or pity, but she also knew that they were never going to truly be friends again, and somehow, the loss of that was so much more difficult than accepting that they were never going to be together romantically.

But he looked so tired that Elizabeth finally nodded. “I think that will help the rumors,” she replied quietly. “One day at a time.”

This entry is part 8 of 19 in the Daughters

You’ve got to get yourself together
You’ve got stuck in a moment
And now you can’t get out of it
Don’t say that later will be better
Now you’re stuck in a moment
And you can’t get out of it
Stuck in a Moment, U2

December 26, 2005

Quartermaine Mansion: Dining Room

Emily watched as Dillon piled his plate high with French toast, bacon, sausage and six slices of toast before arching her eyebrow. “Lu’s hungry this morning I see.”

Dillon glanced at her from the corner of his eye. “How do you always know?” he muttered, reaching for the pitcher of orange juice to pour a glass.

“Please,” his cousin replied. “You hate sausage.” She watched him continue to fill his plate. “Why did she make a break for it this time?”

Dillon hesitated but before he could say anything else, Edward ambled in with Tracy behind him, the two already finding themselves knee deep in their usual arguments. “The thing about Lu is that you think you know what she’s getting herself into and then she just completely goes in another direction.”

“What’s this about Lulu?” Edward demanded. He jabbed a finger in his grandson’s direction. “Mark my words, young man, Lesley Lu Spencer will lead you into nothing but disaster. As this family’s leader of the next generation—”

“I’m out of here,” Dillon interrupted, making a hasty exit towards the foyer.

“That boy is out of control,” Edward continued. “This family is out of control! One grandchild is a motorcycle riding thug, another is a lost cause alcoholic, one has his head in the clouds, another wears leather pants and you…” his gaze fell on Emily. “You have completely lost your mind over some boy.”

He expected Emily to launch into her usual defense of the Cassadine boy but was surprised when she remained silent and took her customary seat to the left of his own. Not sure what to do now that Emily had disrupted his morning routine, Edward sank into his seat and reached for the newspaper. Maybe she hadn’t heard him.

“Have you come to your senses then about that boy?” Edward demanded. “He’s useless, I tell you. And a wastrel! Why, when I think about all the spending he’s authorized at the hospital. He’ll have you in the poorhouse in less than ten years, mark my words!”

But Emily didn’t rise to the bait. She smiled absently at him and bit into her blueberry muffin. She was ignoring him! If there was nothing else Edward hated, it was being treated like a doddering old fool. Well, he’d see about this!

“And when that happens, don’t bother to darken my doorstep!” he declared. “The day you marry him, you’re no longer a Quartermaine!”

He finally got a reaction from his granddaughter but it was not the fiery defense he had expected. Instead, she set her muffin down, pushed her chair away and left the room. He opened his mouth, but nothing came out.

“Nice job, Daddy,” Tracy said, strolling in the room. “I don’t believe I’ve ever seen two members of the family flee the room so close together since Alan and I were teenagers. You haven’t lost your touch.”

Edward put Emily’s strange behavior out of his head and started on the next step in his routine: questioning Tracy about Ned and ELQ.

Kelly’s: Courtyard

Patrick checked his watch and scowled. “She’s late.”

“You have the patience of a five-year-old,” Lucky said. He breathed some warm air into his hands and rubbed them together. He was always leaving his gloves at home. “She’s ten minutes late. Maybe that ancient car of hers wouldn’t start again.”

“I’m not even sure she came home last night,” Patrick huffed. “Will said she disappeared with Morgan and he wasn’t awake when she came back, if she came back at all. She certainly wasn’t there when I got home and she wasn’t there when I woke up.”

“Ellie is a big girl now, which you should know since you’re the same age and you’ve spent a few nights out yourself,” Lucky reminded him. “Why don’t you let the girl live her own life?”

“Because she’s clearly incapable of it,” Patrick said. “Look at who she hangs out with! First Morgan and then she goes to the holiday party with Sonny freaking Corinthos! Who knows where she is right now?”

Elizabeth was not that far away, in fact. She had returned to her apartment, but it had been extremely late and she had met Jason very early that morning for coffee before his shift at the warehouse. At that very moment, she was around the corner, her back pressed up against Kelly’s and giggling as Jason kissed the side of her neck. “I have to go,” she told him.

“Why?” he asked, pulling away and frowning in mock confusion. “You’d rather eat breakfast with your brother?”

“Not in the mood he’s going to be in, but I do have to go to work eventually.” She raised herself up on her tiptoes and kissed his nose. “I’ll see you tonight?”

“What time are you done?” he leaned down to steal another kiss.

“Mmm…” Elizabeth blinked, distracted. “What was the question? Wait…” she closed her eyes and licked her lips, really enjoying the taste of coffee. “Nine tonight. I’m working a little overtime.”

“I’ll meet you in the parking garage then.” He kissed her again. “Unless you want to ditch everything and we’ll go on a ride. I’ll take the cliff road.”

Elizabeth pouted. “No fair. You know I’d do just about anything for that.” She paused and then wiggled her eyebrows. “I’ll do it if I can drive.”

Jason chuckled and stepped back, finally allowing Elizabeth to come away from the wall. “No deal.”

“Bully.” She kissed him one last time and then darted around the corner to find her brother waiting for her impatiently.

Not that Patrick had any other way of waiting. Nothing was ever on time for him, even if it was five minutes early.

“Nice of you to tear yourself away for your own family,” he snarled.

Elizabeth was too buoyed by the events of the last fourteen hours to care about her brother’s bear of a mood. “Well, I’m here now and I’m starving. Let’s grab some food—”

“Not so fast,” Patrick grabbed her arm to anchor her in place. “Lucky, we’ll meet you inside.”

“Courage, El, courage,” Lucky shrugged and entered Kelly’s to find a table.

“Where were you last night?” Patrick demanded.

“Where were you?” Elizabeth countered easily. “You stomped out of Dad’s like a five-year-old and then didn’t bother to come home. I didn’t even leave until after nine and I don’t seem to recall you calling and checking in—”

“Do not turn this around on me, Ellie. I am not the one who spends her time gallivanting with criminals—”

“Patrick, please do not start this right now.” Elizabeth could feel the glow of her happy morning fading away. “Because I swear that if you do not stop asking right now, I will tell you exactly where I was.”

Something in her tone of voice stopped him from opening his mouth for a long second. But he wasn’t out for long. “Did you sleep with him?” Patrick demanded harshly. “Jesus, Ellie—”

“Stop it, just stop it right now!” Elizabeth planted both her hands on his chest and shoved hard. “How dare you do this in the middle of the courtyard? How dare you treat me like a child? I am your sister, you jackass and I think I have earned at least a miniscule of respect.” She jabbed her finger at him. “I will spend my time with whomever I please. I don’t ask you to run your friends by me. You do not get to treat me like this—”

“Whoa, whoa—” Patrick closed his hands over her shoulders. “Wait, I’m sorry.”

“Do not apologize to me unless you mean it,” she warned. “I am through with the Drake men and their drama. You and Dad treat me like I stopped growing up at age five and I am sick of it. I am an adult, Patrick. An adult. Which means I get to sleep with whomever I want.”

“Oh, God, you did—”

“For your information, and I am only telling you this because I don’t want there to be any misunderstandings. I did not have sex with anyone last night, and I did not spend the night with Jason. I came home late and left early.” She crossed her arms and glared at him. “And just so we’re completely honest with each other, I do have feelings for Jason and I am lucky enough to know that he feels the same way. I have the right to that, don’t I?”

“You have the right to that and a lot more, Ellie, but not from some two-bit criminal—”

“If you say another word—just one more word—along that subject line , we are done, Patrick. We are done,” she threatened.

Patrick closed his mouth, fuming. “Fine. Have it your way. You’re right. You’re a big girl now and you can do whatever the hell you want. Far be it for me to try and keep you from making a mistake.” He glared at her for another moment before letting out a huff. “Are we going to eat breakfast or not?”

He expected her to smile and follow him inside like she had done after all their arguments in the past. But this time, she shook her head. “No. I’ll get something at the hospital.”

“Ellie, wait,” he called after her half-heartedly. But he didn’t say it loud enough and she disappeared back into the parking lot.

Patrick went inside and threw himself into the chair across from Lucky who merely checked his watch. “Five minutes less than I thought it would take.”

“Shut the hell up.”

General Hospital: Locker Room

“I am supremely glad that Christmas is over,” Emily said, pulling her scrubs top on. “No more family togetherness.”

“At least until New Year’s Eve,” Robin laughed.

“Do not remind me.” Emily tied her scrubs pants and hesitated before closing her locker. “Robin, am I being selfish?”

“About what?” Robin asked. She bound her hair back in a ponytail. “You’re like the least selfish person I know.”

“About Nikolas.” Emily touched her engagement ring. “I love him, I love him so much, but I love my family, too. I never thought I would, but I do and I just…I feel like I’m making things difficult for my family. They don’t like the Cassadines, they never haveThey don’t approve of my relationship with Nikolas, and I think it’s just going to get worse after we get married, not better.”

“Em, you can’t let your family dictate your choices in life—” Robin began but Emily shook her head.

“I know that,” Emily cut in. “And that’s not what this is about. I have to face what my choices might cost me. This might be my last Christmas with them, my last New Year’s. The only person at my wedding will probably be my mother.”

“Emily, if that’s true, if that’s what happens…” Robin touched her shoulder.

“Then the loss is theirs, not yours.”

“I know that here,” Emily tapped her head and then she pressed her hand flat against her chest. “It’s here I’m having trouble coming to terms with. I love the Quartermaines. They saved me, they gave me so much love and understanding and so many opportunities—how can I make a choice that will cut that off?”

“I don’t know,” Robin answered. “I don’t know what the answer to that is. I guess you’re going to have to find out for yourself if it’s worth taking the risk.”

“He is worth it,” Emily said. “He’s worth it and so much more, but I’m not the only one risking here. Nikolas adores his uncle. Stefan is his father in every way and he has made it clear that if Nikolas goes through with this, Stefan will go back to Greece and will cut all ties. The hatred is that strong.”

“Oh, honey…”

“I’m terrified that one day, the only thing Nikolas and I will see when we look at each other is everything it cost to be together and that we’ll hate one another for it,” Emily confessed.

Spencer House: Living Room

Laura carefully took down Lucky’s Christmas ornament and smiled fondly at it before wrapping it in tissue paper and placing it back in the box. She loved her little family mementos and couldn’t wait to pass certain pieces to her future daughter-in-law, whoever she may be or even a son-in-law one day.

And of course, to Emily, when she joined the family. She had a Christmas ball for Nikolas that she had kept hidden away for many years; she had taken it on the run, brought it home to Port Charles and that first wonderful Christmas that she felt like she could put it up and not have Luke snarl, it had taken its place near Lucky and Lulu’s.

She would hate to part with it, but it should be Emily’s next year.

The door opened and closed behind her and Laura, with that uncanny sense that only mothers seemed to possess, smiled. “I’m glad you came back.” She placed a silver angel into its box and turned. “Honey, I think it’s time we sat and talked.”

Lulu nodded but stayed on the front landing. “I know. That’s why I didn’t sneak in through my window.”

Laura gestured towards the kitchen. “Do you want some hot chocolate? I’ll put marshmallows in it.”

“No,” Lulu bit her lip. “Is anyone else home?”

“No, Lucky went down to the club to do the books, Grandma is at the hospital and your father is looking after the cleanup at the Star.” Laura lowered herself onto the couch and patted the cushion next to her.

Lulu sat gingerly on the edge and kept herself closed off, her arms tightly crossed. “I’m sorry I left yesterday. I was just—you gave me that necklace and I was so…” she shook her head. “I don’t know, everything just bottled up inside me and I couldn’t think anymore.”

“Sweetheart…” Laura wished she could reach out and hug her daughter, but she knew Lulu wouldn’t accept it right now. “That necklace is very special to our family. It’s passed down three generations and it’s my dream that even a hundred years from now, a woman in our family will give it to her daughter and tell her about all the women that came before her.”

Laura took the velvet box from a drawer in the coffee table. “I don’t suppose I went about the right way of giving it to you. Family tradition dictates that on the sixteenth birthday, I come into your room, fasten it around your neck and tell you about those who came first. But that day, as I put it into the box, your father…” she sighed. “You’re his little princess, his gumdrop as he likes to say and he just…he wasn’t ready. He asked me to wait and against my better judgment, I did.”

“This is going to sound so stupid, but when I didn’t get that necklace, when we didn’t have that moment I had actually been looking forward to…” Lulu sniffled. “I thought it…Well, it’s because she knows. She looks at me and she knows.”

Laura frowned. “Know what, Lu?”

“That I’m not a real Spencer,” Lulu admitted in a tiny voice.

“What?” Laura gasped. “What are you talking about?”

“I’m not clever like Dad, I’m not slick like Lucky, I’ll never be as sweet as

Grandma and I’m nothing like you. I’m not graceful, I’m not compassionate, I’m not—”

“Baby…” Laura reached across the gap between them and pulled her daughter into her arms. “How can you say such things? Is this what has been going through your head this last year?”

“I just knew that I didn’t fit, that I didn’t belong and you guys seemed to believe that because you didn’t even give me the family heirloom—”

“You are a Spencer, in every way that counts.” Laura pulled away and smoothed the hair from her daughter’s face. “I pray to God you never have to prove it by having the kind of lives your father and I led and I’m so grateful your childhood wasn’t like Lucky’s, but darling, you are everything that’s good about your father and I. If we had planned our daughter, we couldn’t have planned anything more perfect.”

“You have to say that, you’re my mother,” Lulu mumbled.

“Even after I had Lucky, I knew I wanted one more,” Laura told her. “I wanted a little girl to love and I couldn’t have asked for a better daughter.” She wiped her eyes and sat back. “This pearl necklace was given to my mother on her birthday by my grandmother, your great grandmother. Have I ever told you about her?”

Lulu shook her head. “No. Not really.”

“I didn’t know her, she had passed by the time my mother found me, but her name was Lillian. Her husband gave this to her on their wedding day and it was his idea to pass it down to their daughter, which she did. My mother gave it to me when I turned sixteen even though we were barely on speaking terms, as we so rarely were. She still sat me down and we had this moment.” Laura gestured for Lulu to turn so she could fasten the necklace.

As she did so, Laura continued, “My mother told me that my grandmother was the strongest woman that she’d ever known. She’d grown up during the Great Depression and had left her family to find work so they wouldn’t have to worry about having another mouth to feed. She ended up in Texas, picking fruit for the local orchard and one day, the owner’s son was there to check on the work. According to family legend, he looked at Lillian and she looked back and they never looked at anyone else for as long as they lived.”

Lulu smiled. “That’s very romantic.”

“Mmm…well then my mother told me about my father and how they met. He was her college professor, the man that encouraged her to go into medicine. They did not end up together, of course, but she told me that he had given her the two greatest gifts—her daughter and her path in life.”

“Trust Grandma to find a spin to put on that story,” Lulu laughed.

“So now it’s my turn to tell you about your father and I. I don’t suppose there’s much you don’t already know. We have had an interesting marriage, with all the excitement I think I can stand for one lifetime, but I know that I will never find a man who will cherish me or love me more. I wish that for you, baby.”

“I hope I get half of the love you and Dad have had,” Lulu swallowed hard.

“One day, when I give this necklace to my daughter, I’m going to tell her that my mother was the best woman I’ve ever known and that the only thing I’ve I ever wanted is was for her to be proud of me.”

“Of course I’m proud of you,” Laura began.

“I wish I had a pretty story to tell her or a way to put a spin on how she came into existence, but I don’t.” Lulu fingered her pearls for a long moment. “Because all I’ll be able to say is that I was dating her father to make my parents mad and how I was too scared to tell him I was pretty sure he was going to end up being an alcoholic like all the other men in his family.”

Laura stared at her for a long moment before finding the words. “Are you telling me that you’re pregnant and that Will Drake is the father?”

Lulu nodded miserably. “Still proud of me?”

April 11, 2014

daughtersI’ve completed the editing and revision process for Daughters, beyond typos, so I’ll be posting a chapter here once a day. I might not update the main page about it, except to couple it with another update.

Chapters Six & Seven for Daughters are now online.

I set up a page for the Lost Stories, and put up more explanation how they became lost, and what is still lost, as far I know. I think I still have three or four short stories to post in addition to the ones on this page.

This entry is part 7 of 19 in the Daughters

I still believe in Santa Claus
Maybe that’s just because I’m still
A child at heart
And I still believe in old St. Nick
But then again maybe that’s the trick we need
We need to retreat to a world of make believe
I Still Believe in Santa Claus, New Kids on the Block

December 25, 2005

Spencer House: Upstairs Hallway

Laura Spencer had always thought that raising a daughter would somehow be simpler than raising her sons—or more specifically, raising her son as she hadn’t had much of an input in Nikolas’s upbringing. She’d imagined being able to understand her more than her boys because she’d been a rebellious teen herself.

But Lulu was in a class all her own. She’d been sweet and loving for the first sixteen years but one morning, she’d woken up and her daughter had been replaced by a sullen, angry and disobedient young woman and Laura couldn’t understand where the hostility had come from. She’d plodded along, battling each crisis as it came up but for Lulu to reject a gift that was meant to be a legacy in their family—Laura just couldn’t fathom it.

She knocked once more at Lulu’s door but knew it was a fruitless effort. If Lulu were in the room, she would never answer and it was more likely that she’d crawled out the window. Laura reached into her pocket, withdrew the trusty hair pin that she no longer traveled without and with a few careful flicks of her wrist, unlocked her daughter’s bedroom door.

When Laura had found out she was pregnant, she’d been stunned. And thrilled. She loved her son Lucky and she broke for the loss of her son Nikolas. She craved a daughter and she’d been so sure that her third child would be a female that she’d immediately painted this room a soft pink in preparation. She’d decorated it with white wicker furniture, stuffed animals and a gorgeous oak rocking chair that she used every night for the first year or so of Lu’s life.

Lulu had long ago repainted the walls from the original pink to a loud purple and the carefully selected baby furniture was now gathering dust in the attic. Lu had replaced it with a large brass double bed, a beaten down dresser that she’d painted ebony black and posters of bands that Laura had never heard of covered the walls. Lu’s clothes were strewn over the carpet, still the same cream color and the ancient computer that they’d bought three years ago sat on the second hand desk Laura had refinished for Lu’s fourteenth birthday. Lu had painted it black shortly after she’d turned sixteen.

The window was cracked open and a piece of notebook paper was tucked under one of the pillows on the window seat. Laura sighed, resigned and plucked it free. She unfolded it and read Lulu’s loopy handwriting. I’m sorry, Mom. I had to get away for a little while. I’m at Dillon’s. I’ll call you.

She folded the paper and tucked it underneath one of Lulu’s notebooks on the desk. Some mothers—her own included—would have gone over to the Quartermaine estate and dragged her daughter back if it meant tugging her by the hair. But Laura liked to think that she had learned from her childhood, and from her time raising Lucky on the run. She and Luke had raised a level-headed young woman and no amount of dragging Lulu home would solve this. She would wait until Lulu called (she always did) and then they would take it from there.

She closed Lulu’s door and rejoined her family in the living room. “Lulu’s not feeling well,” Laura lied without guilt. “She needs some time to herself.”

“I don’t think so.” Luke started to rise but stilled with one touch from his wife. “She can’t just sulk whenever she wants—”

“She’s having some boy trouble,” Laura remarked. “She’s not feeling herself and doesn’t want to ruin everyone’s holiday. Sometimes girls just need some time on their own.” She flicked her eyes to her mother. “Right, Mom?”

Lesley Webber hesitated but then smiled at her son-in-law. “She’s right, Luke. Teenage girls will rebel whether you like it or not. You might as well give her some space or else she’ll run off with the first reprobate she finds and before you know it, she’ll spend the whole summer on the run.”

“Ah, hell,” Luke muttered, chastised properly at the reminder that he’d once spirited his beloved angel away from her family and friends simply because he’d wanted her at his side. “The kids were always your area, Laura,” he admitted. “You know better than I do.”

If only Laura could believe that as firmly as Luke seemed to. She smiled and handed a gift to her son, hoping the observant young man had taken her explanation at face value. “Your turn, honey.”

Lucky hesitated before taking the brightly wrapped present, studying his mother’s face. Whether he believed her or decided to support her, Laura wasn’t sure, but Lucky took the gift and started to rip it open.

Quartermaine Estate: Dillon’s Room

Dillon closed the door, coming perilously close to shutting it in his grandfather’s face. For some reason, Edward had decided to pay attention to his youngest grandson and bombard with questions about his future. The words future and Edward never went together in the same sentence without a healthy dose of fear so he’d done his best to escape. Dillon had plans that did not include ELQ.

A thump from his window jarred him from his thoughts and Dillon glanced over in time to see his window slide open and a duffle bag plop to the floor. “Lu?”

His best friend’s blonde head popped in through the opening and in another moment, her body followed. “Hey. Ah, I need a place to crash for a while.”

“You should not be climbing the trellis,” Dillon said, crossing the room and closing the window. “You’re in a delicate—” he gestured with his hands, “you know, condition.”

“Gee, I didn’t know,” Lulu retorted. “Because it’s so easy to forget I’m knocked up.” She huffed. “Relax, I can climb that thing in my sleep.” She sat on his bed and pulled off her boots. “How’d your day go?”

“Edward realized I existed,” Dillon kicked his shoes off and flopped on the bed. He laid back and rested his head on the pillow. A moment later, Lulu’s head appeared on the adjacent side. “My mother and Grandfather had their yearly go around about my brother Ned and his running of the company. Alan and Monica had the house argument about eight times.” He frowned. “The only thing that didn’t go as usual was the Nikolas argument.”

“What, they actually saw Em’s point?” Lulu asked.

“No…Emily never mentioned him so it never came up.” He folded his hands behind his head. “Maybe she’s finally realizing that she’s been wasting her breath. They’re never going to accept him as part of the family.”

“That must be so hard on her,” Lulu sighed. “I mean, my parents never approved of Will, but at least I wasn’t planning on marrying him. And you know, Em like totally lives for this family. It must be really hard knowing they don’t approve of the man you want to marry.”

He’d never thought of it that way before and now it troubled him. Dillon didn’t really mind Nikolas Cassadine—he’d helped Emily bail him and Lulu out of that embarrassing St. Paul mess last year—but Dillon had never really given his cousin his support either. He didn’t think that she had needed it; Emily had always seemed so strong and confident but he supposed it wouldn’t hurt to know that someone was on her side.

“So, speaking of Will,” Dillon said casually. “I ran into him a few days ago.”

Lulu tensed but otherwise didn’t move. “You didn’t tell him I was pregnant,” she stated. “He would have knocked down my door otherwise.”

“Well, I didn’t mention it because it was clear he didn’t know.” Dillon turned his head to face her.  “What encouraged this sojourn from home anyway?”

She sighed and pursed her lips. “My mom gave me the pearls today,” she said quietly. “Like it was all normal and they hadn’t waited two years. She just handed them to me.”

“Lu…” He’d never understand girls. From the moment Lulu had told him about the legendary pearls and how she’d been so upset when she didn’t get them on schedule, he was kind of confused. Lulu didn’t even wear jewelry. “What’d you do?”

“Oh, you know—made a huge scene of running out of the room. I packed a bag and climbed out my window.”

Typical Lulu behavior. “What’re you going to do?” he asked and they both knew he wasn’t referring to tomorrow or even the day after.

Lulu flopped back on the pillow. “I wish I knew,” she said. “I know I’ve got options. They’re limited, you know, but they are there. I could go with adoption, I could go with the young mother routine or I could…” she tapped her fingers restlessly on the bedspread beneath them. “Whatever.”

“You know I’m here no matter what happens, right? No matter what you pick.”

“Yeah, I know.” Lulu smiled faintly. “That’s pretty much the only thing I do know but at least it’s something.” She turned her head to face him. “You think I could pull off the Molly Ringwald routine?”

“Well, that movie did have a happy ending.”

“I could probably be okay at it,” Lulu said after another moment. “I wouldn’t be spectacular I guess, but I could learn. I’ve watched a lot of Gilmore Girls. It would be cool to have a Rory.”

“Does that make me Luke?” Dillon pondered. “I think I might like to be a troubadour though. That looks like fun.”

Lulu snorted. “Please, you’re so Sookie.”

Elizabeth and Patrick’s Apartment: Living Room

Will had just discovered three months worth of Veronica Mars on Patrick and Elizabeth’s DVR when a knock interrupted his impromptu marathon. Grumbling, he paused and stood to answer the door.

In the hallway, stood Jason Morgan with a fistful of flowers and a brightly wrapped box under his arm. The two men stared at each other for a long moment before Jason coughed and shifted his eyes to the left. “I need to speak to Elizabeth,” he said roughly.

Will had spent the day with his cousins, had watched them interact with each other and with their father and he’d become aware that something was bothering Ellie, there was a shadow in her eyes. Will didn’t really like seeing her sad because she was too nice for that and she’d offered to move out without even blinking. It was his turn to look out for her.

He folded his arms across his chest and aimed best steely look at Jason Morgan. “Ellie’s sleeping.”

Jason frowned and shifted his weight from one foot to the other. “It’s six o’clock,” he argued.

“She had a long day,” Will replied. “Maybe you should have called first.” He raised his chin and tried not to think too much about the rumors of Jason Morgan working for Sonny Corinthos.

Jason looked hesitant then and Will might have actually won this round if not for the creak of Elizabeth’s bedroom door opening. “Will, who’s at the door?”

Elizabeth appeared at her cousin’s side and her mouth tightened at the corners when she saw Jason. “Hey, I wasn’t expecting you.”

Apparently deciding to ignore the annoying cousin altogether, Jason held out the flowers—daisies, Elizabeth noticed, not easily found in December. “These are for you.”

She hesitated, slid her eyes to those of her very interested cousin. “Will, you wanna go watch TV or something?”

“I’ll be right over there if you need anything.” Will sent Jason a look he liked to think warned the older man not to mess with Elizabeth and then disappeared to the couch.

“Sorry, he’s…unpredictable,” she waved her hand. Elizabeth accepted the flowers. “Ah, thanks, but you know, I don’t need flowers—”

“Brenda said to bring flowers when I apologized,” Jason interrupted. “She said it would show sincerity.”

She arched an eyebrow. “Do you always do what Brenda says?”

“No,” Jason replied, “but she’s usually right when it comes to stuff like this and I figured it couldn’t hurt to listen to her for once. I’m sorry about last night. I’m still not sure what I did wrong, but you were hurt by whatever it was and I don’t want that so—”

Elizabeth sighed and turned away to grab her jacket from the hook. “Let’s go for a ride, I could really use one.”

He opened his mouth to say that the snowfall that morning had made the roads a little too icy for a ride, but he saw the misery in her eyes and knew it was more than just him. “Sure,” he said, stepping aside so she could join him in the hall. “We just can’t go that fast.”

Quartermaine Mansion: Patio

Emily wrapped her scarf around her neck and slid her hands into the pockets of her maroon pea coat before stepping out onto the patio. She was troubled by her conversation with Dillon, by the idea that this could be her last holiday with the Quartermaines.

She could never bring Nikolas here next year and she couldn’t imagine living in Wyndemere after the wedding, constantly under the disapproving eyes of his uncle Stefan. She wondered if Nikolas was disturbed by how violently their families opposed their marriage. Emily had always assumed they would come to accept it, but she wondered now if Edward had meant his threat not to attend her wedding and if Alan would follow his father’s lead and refuse to walk her down the aisle.

She knew Monica would be there, that Ned and Dillon would show up. AJ, if he wasn’t in rehab. She knew they would be there, but she also knew that none of them really understood why she was determined to marry Nikolas, to have a family with him. To be his wife.

She hadn’t chosen the Quartermaines for her family, she probably would never have chosen them if she’d had a say in the matter, but they were hers now and she didn’t want to sacrifice that, she didn’t want to lose that.

There was a scuffling, some footsteps and Emily turned to see Nikolas stepping up from the lake. She smiled faintly—he’d taken a boat from the island and docked at their boathouse, just as he always did when he wanted to see her at her home and not deal with her family. The smile faded. He went out of his way to avoid her family and she did the same with his. How was that any way to start a life together?

“Merry Christmas,” Nikolas said. He brushed his lips over her cheek but frowned when he saw her expression. “Emily, what’s wrong—”

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. They would find a way to fix this, she was sure of it. “Nothing, just another fun family holiday with the Quartermaines.” She wrapped her arms around his neck and threaded her fingers in his dark hair. “You want to sneak up to my room and make out for a while?”

“I can’t think of a better way than to end this day.” He rested his forehead against hers. “Next year, we’ll be in our home and we won’t have to be apart.”

She wanted to ask where their home would be but kept the words back. She only smiled and kissed him. He was the love of her life and she wasn’t going to give up on this without a fight.

Vista Point

Elizabeth rubbed her hands together and blew into them. “I’m sorry for dragging you out here,” she sighed. She rested her back against the railing and tilted her head up to the sky. There were no stars out tonight. “I just couldn’t sit in that apartment anymore.”

“Your cousin said you had a long day,” Jason remarked. “Is something wrong with his family?”

“Oh, it’s just the usual Drake family sob story,” Elizabeth murmured. “Patrick and I come from a long line of alcoholics, you know, but it’s not until my dad’s generation that they even bothered to label it that way. No one saw anything wrong with a man coming home after work and drinking a few drinks.” She shifted. “My dad was a social drinker, but you know what happened after my mom died. He just…lost all control, but his brother, my uncle—he was always drinking. We always knew he was alcoholic. He drove my aunt Cheryl from a very loving and bright woman into this cold, hard shell. She finally filed for divorce last year and since then, Will’s been living with the result. She started drinking, too, which makes her a hypocrite, and he started to act out.” She pursed her lips. “But I can’t really tell you what this last year has been like for him because I stopped paying attention. He’s younger than me by eight years and I just…” she shrugged. “I lost track.”

“It’s not your fault,” Jason said when she fell silent. “You have your own life.”

“Apparently, Will has been drinking pretty heavily since Lulu Spencer broke up with him and last night, he embarrassed himself at the Haunted Star. Patrick took him home and Aunt Cheryl…” she shook her head. “She was cruel to him, she slapped him and Patrick didn’t want to leave him there, couldn’t. So he brought him to our place.” She met Jason’s eyes. “Today, we went to my father’s apartment. It’s the first Christmas since my mother died that we’ve tried it but I guess after watching what happened to Will, after I blew up at him, Patrick just couldn’t keep it inside him anymore. He blew up at my father for abandoning us when Mom died. They argued and Patrick stormed out. He still hasn’t come home.”

Jason leaned against the railing next to her. “Maybe he just needs some time to himself.”

“I guess.” Elizabeth sighed. “I’m sorry I made a scene last night. I was just—I was upset and I shouldn’t have been. We’re friends and—”

“I didn’t really spend a lot of time with you,” Jason interrupted. He paused for a moment. “You were right when you said that couriers wouldn’t take a meeting like that. Sonny’s…he thinks I’ve got potential and he thinks I can read people well so he asked me to sit in on the meeting. I was nervous last night because I didn’t want to let him down but I wanted you to know that I had already agreed to go with you when Sonny brought up the meeting.”

Elizabeth nodded. “Okay, I can deal with that.” She exhaled slowly. “So, this is what you want? Working for Sonny…like this?”

“Is that—” He shifted. “Is that going to a problem?”

It should have been, Elizabeth thought. If Sonny Corinthos thought Jason had potential, he would move up in the organization into more dangerous positions and she had grown up as the best friend of the police commissioner’s daughter. She believed in right or wrong, in justice and in the law. Nothing was ever black or white, she reminded herself and Sonny’s world was populated with gray. Jason would be a criminal, but she knew Sonny ran a clean operation and a mostly safe one. Everyone knew what kind of man Sonny was.

But more importantly, she knew what kind of man Jason was and his friendship was too important to her. “No,” she said after a long moment. “I can’t say I wish you’d chosen a more…traditional career path but I know how important this job was to you, how much you respect Sonny. Friends don’t ask each other to give up things they love.”

Jason tilted his head to the side. “But we’re not just friends, Elizabeth. I mean, Sonny’s my friend. I don’t think about him the way I think about you.”

Her eyes widened. “How do you think about me?” she asked, her voice almost a whisper.

Jason wasn’t sure how to answer that but he liked honesty, he valued straight forward answers so he just went with his instinct. “I-I think about your mouth,” he said after a moment. The tips of his ears felt a little warm and he thought he might finally know what it was to feel embarrassed. “The way it would…taste.”

Elizabeth never believed that the heart could actually stop or skip a beat like it did in all those trashy romance novels, but that was before Jason Morgan told her he wondered what it would be like to taste her mouth. Her heart more than just skipped, it started to gallop. “Oh.” She blinked and licked her lips. “Well…I can’t say that I haven’t—” she coughed. “I can’t say that I haven’t given the matter the same sort of consideration with regards to your, ah,” she gestured when words failed her.

And because she knew she’d never forgive herself if this moment passed without a little bit of courage on her part, she cleared her throat and said what any self-respecting heroine in those novels would. “I think we should find out.”

“I think…” Jason drew out the words as he straightened and gripped her under the elbows, “that is a really…good idea.” He dipped his head and Elizabeth felt almost light headed as he lifted her just a little to close the distance between them. His mouth brushed over hers, feather light before settling in for a long sip.

He drew back and Elizabeth remembered to breath and tried to remember what that heroine would say next. “So what’s the verdict?” she finally asked, not even recognizing the tone of her own voice. Surely that was someone else speaking. Her voice never shook or sounded so…unsure.

Jason licked his lips and a smile spread slowly across his lips. “A little cold,” he admitted. “I’d like to conduct further tests if you wouldn’t mind.”

“Oh, boy,” Elizabeth mumbled before he kissed her again.

This entry is part 6 of 19 in the Daughters

Memories ’round the Christmas tree
Are the sweetest ones that remain with me
It’s a comfort deep inside
Though you can’t stop the race of time
To know that Christmas will always be

At Christmas, Hanson

December 25, 2005

Elizabeth & Patrick’s Apartment: Living Room

Elizabeth yawned and stumbled out of her room, almost crashing into the Christmas tree in her trek to the kitchen for some coffee. Unfortunately, this was not a normal morning where Patrick would have risen before her and prepared it. So she clumsily set up the filter and poured the water and hoped for the best.

She peered out into the living room and frowned when she saw a tall lanky form sprawled over their couch. Why would Patrick have crashed on the couch when he had a perfectly good bed just ten feet away? She rubbed her eyes and stepped forward and finally realized that while the person was taller than she was, he didn’t have Patrick’s height. And his hair was somewhat lighter than her brother’s.

Why was her cousin Will on their couch?

Too bleary for complex thoughts this early, Elizabeth decided to wait until she’d had at least eight cups of coffee before thinking the matter over.

Patrick exited his room and joined her at the coffee machine, wincing at the strange smell coming from inside. “What did you do wrong this time?” he demanded. She scowled at him—stupid morning person. How did he think so clearly so early? She should do the world a favor and crack him over the head with something hard.

Patrick dumped her coffee attempt and restarted it before turning to his sister. “You wanna go back to sleep until it’s finished?”

She glared at him wordlessly and then sat at their kitchen table. He sat across from her and reached for a medical journal to peruse through until the coffee was finished. Restless, Elizabeth started to tap her fingers. After a few moments of trying to ignore it, Patrick reached over and grabbed her hand. “You know that annoys me.”

“It’s a sister’s prerogative to annoy her brother,” Elizabeth said dryly. Just the aroma of the coffee was perking her up a bit. “We need to look into some kind of intravenous coffee line.”

“Or you can just stay in bed until you smell the coffee,” Patrick replied, releasing her hand. “I suppose you’re wondering why we have a houseguest.”

“The thought crossed my mind,” Elizabeth stifled a yawn. “I thought you took him home last night.”

“Ellie, are you awake yet?” he asked. “Because this isn’t a conversation we should have until you are.”

Jolted by the serious tone in his voice, Elizabeth stood and crossed to the fridge. Orange juice helped in an emergency. She poured herself a glass and gulped it down. “Okay, I’m awake.”

“I took him home and his mother was drunk. She was insulting and she slapped him around.” Irritated remembering it, Patrick tossed the journal back onto the table. “And I don’t think it’s the first time she’s acted like that.”

Elizabeth sighed and set the orange juice back in the fridge. “I haven’t spent enough time with him since Uncle Liam walked out on them.” She returned to her seat. “So what do you propose we do? Arrange for Aunt Cheryl to go to rehab?”

“Sure, we can do that. But I think Will should stay with us until she’s put herself back together.” He shook his head. “I can’t change the way I treated you after Mom died. How I treated Robin and anyone else who cares about me. But I can stop myself from watching another train wreck just pass me by. He needs someone to stand up for him, Ellie.”

“Absolutely, he should stay with us,” Elizabeth agreed. “Robin rented a two bedroom apartment, maybe I can go stay with her for a while and Will can use my room—”

“You don’t have to do that, El,” Will said, appearing in the doorway. “I’m not putting you out of your home.”

“Will, honestly, I don’t care about me,” Elizabeth assured him. Patrick stood up to pour three cups of coffee. “You need a place to stay and you can’t just use the couch. For one thing, you’re too tall—”

“No, I have to go back to my house,” Will said. He took the mug of black coffee and took a long gulp. “You have any aspirin?” he asked Patrick hopefully.

“You’re not going back there-” Patrick began. Elizabeth stood to retrieve some aspirin from the medicine cabinet.

“I can’t walk out on my mom,” Will argued. “That would make me no better than my dad.” He took the pills his cousin offered. “Thanks.”

“I appreciate that you want to stick by her, dude, but c’mon. You’re practically falling down drunk most of the time, you’re getting into fights and your grades have probably taken a serious hit. You’re not an adult yet, you don’t have to act like one,” Patrick told him.

“Look, thanks, but no thanks. I don’t need you guys to fix me, okay?” He took another long gulp of his coffee. “Mom just needs time—”

“Hey, who do you think has kept you out jail?” Patrick demanded. He slapped a hand against his chest. “Me. I’m the one that gets up in the middle of the night and convinces Robert Scorpio not to toss your skinny ass in jail.”

“I only called you because you’ve got an in with the commissioner,” Will said sourly. “If I’d known you’d throw it in my face later—”

“That’s not what he’s doing, Will.” Elizabeth covered his hand with his own. “We just want to help. We know we haven’t been there the way we should have and we’re both sorry—”

“You’ve got your own lives to worry about,” Will jerked a shoulder. “It doesn’t bother me.”

“In any case, you’re staying with us,” Patrick said firmly. “Ellie, when’s Robin moving into her new apartment?”

“After the holidays, I think. She’s staying with her dad until then. I’ll give a call later and see if I can use the extra bedroom.” Elizabeth took a long sip of her coffee. “Now, why don’t we all get showered and dressed? We’ve got to hit Dad’s for breakfast.”

It was clear his cousins weren’t going to give him much of a choice. If he just left and went home, Patrick would only follow and drag him back. When the twins made up their minds about something, there was no talking them out of it. So Will sighed, sat back and finished his coffee.

Robert Scorpio’s House: Living Room

Robin sat in the window seat, staring at the falling snow as she twirled the white phone cord around her finger. “Merry Christmas, Mom.”

“Well, Happy Christmas, darling. I confess, I’m still not used to hearing your voice,” Anna Devane remarked dryly.

Robin sighed. They’d never give up on the guilt trips. “Well, that’s over now, Mom. Is it snowing where you are?”

“Raining,” Anna replied. “But that’s England for you. Has your father driven you mad yet?”

“No, not yet,” Robin smiled over her shoulder at her father who was cursing at the lights on the tree that refused to light up. It was a yearly battle that Robert lost more than he won. “But the thought that I’ll be moving into my own place in two weeks keeps the insanity at bay.” She hesitated. “I wish you were here, Mom.”

“I know, darling, and I do as well, but I just wasn’t able to get away this year. Perhaps next year.”

“Right.” Robin shifted and looked out again at the landscape that she’d grown up with. The house had been in her family for two generations now. Her grandparents—her father’s parents—had bought it when this section of Port Charles had been rural and there had been nothing but fields and trees surrounding it. By the time Robert and Mac were old enough to have their own families, the growing city had started creeping in. A house here, a house there.

Robert had married Anna and they’d always lived in this house, even when his parents had been alive. Mac had married Felicia Cummings and they’d moved to a newly built house a few streets away to raise their girls. But this house had always been in Robin’s dreams. Once, she’d dreamt of raising her own family here. Of graduating from medical school with Patrick and then in a year or two, after the first years of being interns were behind them, they’d marry or maybe they’d already be married and then they’d start talking about children.

It had always been Patrick Drake in those dreams though she felt disloyal now to Stone for feeling that way. But with Stone, there hadn’t been time for dreams and plans for the future. There had only been the precious gift of right here and now. And now the future was a concept Robin couldn’t visualize.

And now, the home she had grown up in was still there but there were more houses now, more streets and there was even some stores. It was a blinding reminder that time didn’t stand still and that things would always change.

But this house would always be here for her and Robin didn’t even have to live there to know it. “Next year, Mom. You can come here and you and Dad can pretend that you still hate each other. And we’ll have a huge Christmas party.”

After she’d slid the phone back in the receiver, Robert joined her, perching at the other end of the window seat. He handed her a mug of hot chocolate. “It’s Christmas, love, you shouldn’t look so down.”

“I’m not down,” Robin said. She sipped her drink and smiled at him. “I’m just reflecting. It’s been a whirlwind couple of weeks and I can’t believe everything that’s happened since I’ve been home.” She set the mug on a nearby table and pulled her legs up to tuck her knees under her chin. “Dad, you told me that you were glad we weren’t involved with the Drakes anymore. Is that because of his cousin?”

Robert sighed and leaned back. “Partly. And because of his father,” he admitted. “I’ve hauled Will Drake in more times than I count and it’s always for fighting, trespassing and lately, it’s public drunkenness.” He shook his head. “Patrick bails him out. Doesn’t want the mother to know. But I don’t know how much longer I can look the other way. Patrick’s a good kid, he always was. But his father’s a lush, his uncle’s worthless and his sister…” He shifted. “His sister’s taken to hanging out with the local criminal element.”

“I thought Noah stopped drinking after the accident,” Robin said, a little dismayed. “That’s what I’ve heard—”

“Well, now, that’s what I’ve heard as well. But sometimes they just get better at hiding it. In any case, it’s a good thing you and Patrick won’t be mixing the genes.”

Robin smiled faintly. “Oh…there’s no danger in that.” She took a long sip of her hot chocolate. “Patrick and I are just friends now.” She smiled at her father. “And Ellie’s not hanging with the local criminal element,” she echoed her father’s words with a teasing tone. “She’s friends with Jason Morgan. It’s hardly her fault if after they became friends, he chose to work for Sonny Corinthos. And he’s only working in the warehouse.”

“Sweetheart…” Robert shook his head, “No, it’s a holiday and we’re not going to get into this today. I’m glad to have you home.” He leveled a glare at her. “Even if you are leaving me again to stay in this lonely house all by my lonesome.”

Robin arched an eyebrow. “Dad, I’ve hardly stayed here since I started college. You’re laying it on thick now.”

“It’s a father’s prerogative,” Robert replied. He touched her nose. “I’m glad to have you home again, love. Don’t you leave again.”

“I don’t plan on it,” Robin replied softly.

Quartermaine Mansion: Living Room

Emily pressed a finger to her head. “Please, God, if you’re listening, save me.”

Dillon shook his head and reached for a scone. Biting into with great relish, he remarked, “Don’t bother. I tried that about an hour ago when Grandfather set in on my hair. God’s off today.”

Emily huffed. “He always is when I need him.” She sipped her orange juice. “Why must we do this every year? How many rounds of Ned’s Not Running ELQ The Way Grandfather Wants are we going to have to sit through?”

“As many as it takes before my mother stops rising to the bait.” Dillon cast a look back to the family gathered on the sofa and the settee. Tracy was needling Edward about the great success that her son had turned out to be, despite Edward kicking her out of the family while he’d been growing up. “You’d think they’d be happy that it’s still a family firm.”

“Careful, Dillon, you don’t want Grandfather to think you care,” Emily popped a piece of bacon into her mouth and chewed. “He’ll be grooming you to take over.”

Dillon shuddered. “Oh, God. Don’t even say those words out loud. Because now they’re out there and they’re floating and they’ll go in his ear and I won’t be able to turn around without hearing about investments and capital gains and all that other crap I could care less about.” He sighed and continued to loiter at the breakfast buffet with his cousin. “You going over to see Nikolas today?”

“We’re meeting at the Spencers.” Emily glanced at him. “You want to come along, see the mother of your child?”

Dillon opened his mouth to accept the invitation before the rest of her sentence filtered in and he flushed. “So you’ve heard.”

“I’ve heard that Lu tried to talk you into yet another brainless scheme. Just as long as it doesn’t involve Minnesota again, I figure I’ll toss my support in.” She set the tongs for the eggs down and glared at him. “Support for Lu telling Will and for you to learn to tell that girl no every once in a while. I love Lulu, you know I do. But isn’t there a point where you gotta tell her she’s on her own?”

“I could,” Dillon said after a moment. “It’s crossed my mind. But she’s family, you know? She’s…” he hesitated. “She’s my best friend. And she’s been there for me. She’d have my back if I needed her. She’s Lu, Emily. I’d like to see you tell her that she can’t count on you.”

“I understand loyalty to friends, believe me. Lucky and Nikolas, they’re my family, they’ve been my friends for years. And Ellie and Patrick and Robin. If any of us needed someone, we know we can count on each other. But, honey,” Emily hesitated. “I think that you need to think very carefully about how you and Lu deal with this situation. If you’re gonna get killed by Luke, I’d rather it be for something you actually did.”

“Thanks, Em. I did talk her out of that first plan, you know that. So I appreciate all the stuff you’ve gotten me and Lu out of. But she’s my best friend. And I’m gonna do whatever she needs me to do.” Dillon set a slice of French toast on his plate. “Just like how you do what this bunch of loons need you to do. You don’t parade Nikolas around, you don’t ask your parents or Grandfather about wedding plans. Because you know that they’re never going to accept Nikolas or his family. And they’re never going to make him feel welcome.” He shrugged. “It’s just what you do for family. You accept what you can’t change and you deal with it. Lu’s impulsive, irrational and half the time, she drives me crazy. But I can’t change her and honestly, Em, I wouldn’t if I could.”

He walked away from her and perched on the arm of the chair his beleaguered older brother sat in. Emily stood at the buffet table for a long moment and finally squared her shoulders and joined her family.

Her cousin was right after all. The Quartermaines would tolerate her marriage to Nikolas, but they would never accept him, never make him feel like part of the family. And that tore at her just a little. She loved her adopted family so much and had worked so hard to make herself one of them. A small piece of her wondered if falling in love with the scion of her family’s worst enemy was a betrayal in some ways.

The Quartermaines had a rivalry with the Cassadines that didn’t quite measure up to the Cassadines and Spencer feud, but it was felt—on both sides of the family, though all the parties excluding her grandparents had been dead for years. She thought that she and Nikolas could be happy with the knowledge that they loved each other and were happy together but family was so important to both of them. Could they really turn their backs on it forever?

“You look like someone just killed your best friend,” her mother said, sliding an arm around her shoulders. “You okay, sweetheart?”

Emily smiled faintly. “I’m fine, Mom. Just anxious to finish breakfast so we can get to the presents.”

Spencer House: Living Room

Lulu shook the box her mother handed her. “I wonder if that’s the new set of door locks for my room,” she teased.

Laura laughed and shook her head, putting a hand on her mother Lesley’s shoulder. “Open it, baby, and find out.”

“Maybe it’s a muzzle,” Lucky called out from the desk where he was putting the finishes touches on the computer he’d bought Lulu for Christmas. He’d built it himself and had been quite excited to give it to her though he knew she’d only use it for chatting and emailing and plotting her ridiculous schemes. Still, she’d be off to college next year and she’d need it.

“Maybe it’s a new brother,” Lulu said sweetly. She tore off the wrapping paper and pulled out a velvet jewelry box. Her hands started to tremble and she looked at her mother, at her grandmother with trepidation. “Mom?”

“We’re a little late giving them to you, darling,” Laura said, “but your father wasn’t ready yet.” She looked at her husband affectionately. “He still thinks you’re twelve.”

“As far as I’m concerned she is,” Luke grumbled. “Daughters should stay twelve forever.” He looked at his wife’s son, the stepson that he grudgingly accepted and to his own son. “Believe me, when you have girls of your own, you’ll understand.”

Lulu lifted the lid and found the double strand of white pearls nestled inside. Her heart pounded as she skimmed her fingertips over them. Her great-grandmother had given these to Lesley on her sixteenth birthday and Lesley had in turn continued the tradition by giving them to her daughter Laura on her sixteenth birthday. Lulu had known this and had been so excited on her birthday but instead, her parents had given her the keys to her brother’s old Chevrolet. She’d been devastated and sure that they had sensed finally what she’d known all long. She wasn’t a real Spencer—she would never be as slick and cunning as her father, as gracious and elegant as her mother, cool and confident like her brother or even sweet and loving like Lesley, her grandmother. She wasn’t a real Spencer and they’d proved they knew it by not passing the pearls down to her.

She’d cried herself to sleep that night and for two weeks afterwards. And from that moment on, she decided to prove to herself and to her family that she was a real Spencer, that she belonged in this family.

And they’d given her the pearls for Christmas now—when she was on the brink of disappointing them forever and having a baby out of teenaged wedlock. The tears swelled in her eyes and she set the box down with care and delicacy before springing to her feet and running from the room.

April 10, 2014

Using the Internet Wayback Machine, I located about elevenish short stories that I wrote in 2002/03, including some interesting stories in which Brenda tortures Jason.  I haven’t figured out how to index them on this site, so I’ll just list them in the post until I figure out a better way.

Song Fiction

It’s Meant the World
Do You Ever Think of Me
Some Say Love
Eternity

Replacing The Twit – some episode tags in which I either added Elizabeth to a scene she wasn’t in on the show or removed Courtney and inserted Elizabeth.

Lizzie Does Thanksgiving
Jealousy
Apologies

Brazen BFF Stories (Ha. I always loved these two together. GH missed the boat with them being bffs.) Basically, Brenda leads Jason back to happiness.

Coming Home
What Makes You Happy

Missing Stories from Heliconia and Clam Chowda

Violence Solves Everything (Jason/Brenda dialogue fic)
Better Late Than Never

This last story is not a Liason fic, but a Georgie POV fic that has some Elizabeth in it. It was meant to be the first part of a larger story, but, ah, it’s been lost to history.

The Sweetest Thing: Applications and Admirations

 

I still have some short stories I located at Liason Underground, but there are also several abandoned chapter fics. Would you guys be interested in some of the stories I started, but never completed for some reason?

Inspiration & Timeline

Set in December 2002 after Jason slept with Courtney. I wrote this in December 2002, using the song Come Away With Me by Norah Jones before it became LiRic’s theme song. YouTube video embedded below.


Banner



Come away with me in the night
Come away with me
And I will write you a song

Brownies. What made him think of that? What had made him tell Brenda to make brownies.

The only food Elizabeth could cook without burning them. He’d found a box of the mix in one of the cabinets after she’d walked out. He’d tried to make them, but they hadn’t tasted like hers.

He was running on autopilot now. After leaving Brenda at the penthouse, he’d just had to be by himself for a while. So many of his actions seemed strange and peculiar to him.

He’d slept with Courtney. With Sonny’s little sister. With Elizabeth’s friend. He’d slept with her.

He was no better than Lucky.

Come away with me on a bus
Come away where they can’t tempt us
With their lies

She knew she should turn around the second she saw him sitting on the bench. She remembered sitting there with him, three years ago, when he told her he was leaving. She’d cried for days and missed, but now she wished he’d never come back.

At least then she’d have their perfect friendship instead of the broken relationship.

There was something about him right now—something lost and vulnerable. Something she couldn’t turn her back on, no matter how much she wanted to.

“Hey.”

I want to walk with you
On a cloudy day
In fields where the yellow grass grows knee-high
So won’t you try to come

He looked up at the sound of her voice to find her standing a few feet from him. Her eyes were concerned, caring. He frowned, wondering why she was talking to him. Why she hadn’t walked away.

“Hey,” he replied.

“You look like you’ve got the weight of the world on your shoulders,” Elizabeth said quietly, taking a seat next to him.

He shrugged, not really knowing what to say. How could he explain to her that he had to stay married to a woman he hated, that she had to stay in the penthouse where Jason resented her presence, because as far as he was concerned, the only woman who belonged there was Elizabeth.

How was he supposed to explain that he’d made a mistake and slept with Courtney and somehow managed to lead her on, thinking they had a chance. He’d let himself believe he could be with Courtney, and be happy.

He’d been lying to himself, he could see that now. That the only person he’d ever be happy with was sitting next to him and she wanted nothing to do with him.

He sat back on the bench and looked at her. Her gaze was unwavering and strong. Like she’d finally made a decision.

And he decided to trust her. “Have you ever done something you wished you could take back as soon as it happened, but somehow you ended up making it worse?”

The question startled Elizabeth, but she nodded. “Yeah. I have…” She looked down at her hands. “When I slept with Zander.”

Come away with me and we’ll kiss
On a mountaintop
Come away with me
And I’ll never stop loving you

“I did that yesterday,” Jason told her. “And you’ll probably never forgive me for it.”

She bit her lip and looked away. She’d seen Courtney today—she already had a pretty good idea what he’d done.

She’d been hurt at first, but she’d put it into perspective. He hadn’t done anything that she hadn’t. She’d slept with Zander, let him believe he had a chance. And Jason had slept with Courtney, and she obviously believed that they had a chance.

“Try me,” she said quietly.

He looked up. “I slept with Courtney.”

And I want to wake up with the rain
Falling on a tin roof

“I know.” She shifted on the bench and stared out over water. “She told me.”

He frowned. “And you…still sat down and talked to me. I thought—”

Elizabeth looked back at him. “You never turned me away after Zander. I made a lot of mistakes, Jason. But the biggest one was walking away from our friendship.” Her eyes softened. “We were friends before we were anything else, and that friendship has always meant the world to me.”

He reached for her hand. “It’s meant the world to me, too,” he admitted.

While I’m safe there in your arms
So all I ask is for you

“I miss it,” she confessed. “I miss talking with you, and going for rides and…just being around you. I understand that you’re married to Brenda and with what’s happening with the Alcazar murder, I’m guessing that’s going to last a little longer than you thought, huh?”

“Yeah,” Jason admitted. “We have to stay married so we can’t testify against each other.”

“And what about Courtney?” Elizabeth asked quietly. She looked down at their hands, watched his thumb move in small circles across her skin.

To come away with me in the night

“I’m going to have to explain that I’m in love with the most wonderful woman in the world,” he said softly.

She looked up, her eyes shining with unshed tears. “I love you, too,” she breathed.

He stood up, using their joined hands to pull her up with him. Suddenly not caring who was watching, whether it was the PCPD or Scott Baldwin or Courtney, he pulled her to him and kissed her.

He’d waited too long to care about anyone else.

When he pulled away, she smiled up at him. “So, speaking of rides…”

Come away with me