Song in first part of chapter: Sand and Water (Beth Neilsen Chapman)

Friday, April 11, 2003

General Hospital: Nurse’s Station

All alone I didn’t like the feeling
All alone I sat and cried

Elizabeth Webber sat on the sofa by the elevators, staring straight ahead, ignoring the ball of nausea in her stomach. Fiercely trying to block out the memory of the test results Dr. Kelly Lee had delivered twenty minutes earlier.

Somehow, it was all a dream. This entire week of terror and nightmares would be a dream.

Any moment now, she would wake up and maybe if she were truly lucky, she would wake up months and months ago. God, if she could just go back to the fall, and wait five lousy seconds for Jason to talk to her, to apologize to her. It might all be different.

Or even further back. Maybe if she had thrown Jason’s cell phone into the harbor, he wouldn’t have taken the phone call that had sent him out the night the lights went out and she’d slept with Zander.

What she wouldn’t do for the power of time travel.

All alone I had to find some meaning
In the center of the pain I felt inside

But it wasn’t a horrible dream. It was her reality. She had gone from a man who was too stubborn to say anything that really mattered to a man who used words as a weapon.

In her loneliness, in her aching need to be loved and to matter, she’d allowed Ric Lansing into her life. He was everything Jason wasn’t, she’d told herself. He told her how beautiful she was, and how happy she made him, and how much he wanted to be with her. She’d lapped it up like a stupid little girl, too needy and desperate to see the truth

Ric Lansing was everything Jason Morgan wasn’t. He was a liar, who used all those words to pump her for information about Jason and Sonny, information she wouldn’t have given even if she’d known all the answers to the questions he wanted. He was a user, who’d only sought her out after finding her talking to Jason one night at Luke’s.

And she wished to God she’d known she was just a pawn in his game to get to Sonny Corinthos. His half-brother.

All alone I came into this world
All alone I will someday die

She had ignored all the warning signs, had ignored Jason’s words of caution because she told herself he might be jealous or something else stupid and inane to explain why Jason would say these things about a man he barely knew. Jason didn’t know Ric like she did. She had never listened to Taggart, Nikolas, her grandmother or anyone else who talked about Jason like that, why should she listen to these things about Ric?

It wasn’t like she could trust Jason to tell the truth. He’d let her comfort him at Sonny’s funeral. He’d told her they would try to be more, to finally capitalize on the years of feelings and emotions, and they’d be together.

She’d thought she mattered. Until Courtney. Until the lipstick on his neck, all the days he never stopped in the penthouse while she was there…and the loft he’d bought for Courtney.

So she’d told herself Ric was a good man, and that Jason hadn’t done much but lie to her for months.

Solid stone is just sand and water, baby
Sand and water, and a million years gone by

And instead she’d learned the truth the hard way. She’d learned that Ric had targeted her to bother Jason, and when that hadn’t worked, he had pretended to sleep with Carly when she was drunk.

Not that Ric had admitted these things or even felt bad, but he’d taunted Sonny and Jason one night earlier that week at Kelly’s. Sonny had learned about Carly, had tracked Ric down in the courtyard and none of them had bothered to look inside the restaurant, where Elizabeth had been closing up for the night.

And Elizabeth had learned the hard way that she couldn’t trust herself.

I will see you in the light of a thousand suns
I will hear you in the sound of the waves

And now…she was pregnant. She was pregnant with Ric Lansing’s child.

She stared down at the pamphlets Kelly had handed her, after Elizabeth had broken down in tears. Not to push her way or another, but to understand that she had options if she didn’t want the child. Adoption. Abortion.

And all Elizabeth wanted to do was crawl under the covers and stay there for the rest of her life. Anything not to make this decision.

How could she have a child? She was a waitress who lived in a broken down studio without her own bathroom, much less a kitchen. She had a degree in art, but what the hell could she do with that? Of course she couldn’t have this baby. She’d have to have an abortion. There was no other choice.

I will know you when I come, as we all will come
Through the doors beyond the grave

And yet, how could she blame an innocent life for the crimes of its parents? This child was half her, and despite her many failings, she still had time to pull her life together. She had options. She could get her teacher’s certification. She could go into the nursing program like her grandmother kept hinting.

Ric Lansing didn’t have to be a part of this child’s life.

And, maybe it was selfish, but if she had this child…if Elizabeth became a mother, there would finally be someone in this world who loved her.

Just the way she was.

Elm Street Pier

All alone I heal this heart of sorrow

Her heart heavy, her body tired and her mind racing with ways to keep this pregnancy a secret from the worst choice of her life, Elizabeth blindly walked towards Kelly’s, stopping at the top of the stairs to the Elm Street Pier when she heard voices.

Familiar voices.

Hanging back around the corner, Elizabeth waited for Ric Lansing and whoever he was with to disappear so she could head to work.

“What have I told you about seeking me out in public?” Ric demanded.

“You like it better when we’re all by ourselves in bed,” a female voice purred, and the pit in Elizabeth’s stomach grew, burning. She knew that voice.

All alone I raise this child

“Well…” God she knew that tone. That disgusting charming tone he used when he was flirting. When he was convincing her she was the only woman in his life. “That may be true,” Ric continued. “But things are tense right now, and if anyone sees us talking…”

“You mean the little twit,” Faith Roscoe purred. “I thought you were gonna cut her loose.”

Oh, she was going to be sick. She was going to lose it, and just start heaving for all the world to hear.

“I was,” Ric said. “But she’s amusing, and while it doesn’t seem to bother Morgan much I’m screwing his ex-bed buddy, I know Sonny can’t stand it, so she’s worth the trouble.”

Elizabeth sank to her knees, wishing she were anywhere else in the world. She’d known she’d been targeted to bother Jason, but to hear him…to hear him put it that way, God, she just wanted to set herself on fire.

Flesh and bone, he’s just
Bursting towards tomorrow

“You’re lucky I’m so understanding,” Faith remarked. “If I thought you gave a damn about her, I might decide to…take preventative measures.”

Tears slid down Elizabeth’s cheeks, and she just wanted to disappear. She’d been so stupid. She should have listened to Jason. She should have known better. She should have trusted him.

“Now, now. You can’t make any waves.” His voice lowered slightly and Elizabeth couldn’t really make out words other than “danger, Families, money.”

And his laughter fills my world and wears your smile

Their voices finally faded, and she heard footsteps indicating they were moving out further onto the pier. Even when she was sure they were gone, she remained on the ground, her arms wrapped around herself, tears sliding down her cheeks.

That was the father of her child, who talked about screwing her to annoy someone else. She hadn’t meant anything to him, not even a little.

If she could just curl up into a ball and fade into nothing, it might be for the best.

I will see you in the light of a thousand suns
I will hear you in the sound of the waves

She heard footsteps on the stairs, and told herself to get up, to move, but her legs were frozen, her brain sluggish. When the steps stopped in front her, she opened her eyes and saw the boots a few feet from her.

If Elizabeth possessed any energy left to be embarrassed, she might have actually burst into flames as she watched Jason Morgan crouch in front her, his eyes concerned.

She was too shattered to care.

“Elizabeth,” he said quietly. “How long have you been here?”

I will know you when I come, as we all will come
Through the doors beyond the grave

And oh, God…he must have heard. Oh, God. She opened her mouth to respond, to say something…anything to stop this torment. She could lie to him—she’d only just gotten here, she’d tripped and stumbled.

But she just couldn’t drag it out of herself. “Long enough,” she murmured.

All alone I came into this world

She heard Jason’s inhale of breath, and wondered what he thought of her being targeted because of him. He’d always said his enemies would use her to get to him, he probably hadn’t thought it be through sex and that she’d let them.

“I wish I could blame you,” she said softly, keeping her eyes on the ground, not meeting his gaze. “That Ric only came for me because I…because of you. But I can’t.” Her breath was shaky as she slowly exhaled. “Because you told me, and I ignored you.”

“I am so…” He stopped, and slid his hands under her elbows to help her stand. “Elizabeth—”

All alone I will someday die

“There’s nothing you can say.” Another tear slid down her cheek. “I heard most of it at Kelly’s earlier this week, but you know…he didn’t put it that way then.” She struggled to keep from sinking back to the ground. “He just told you he’d had to use Carly when you didn’t seem to give a damn about me.”

“I—” But Jason didn’t seem to know what say.

“It’s okay.” Elizabeth offered a shaky smile. “Really. I needed…” She took a deep breath, trying not to collapse under the weight of the devastation of her life, of her dreams. “I needed to hear him put it that way. To know that he’d been sleeping with other women, with Faith Roscoe. I hadn’t broken up with him yet, you know. I didn’t think I could be in the same room with him, I was afraid he’d explain away his words to you and Sonny the way he always seemed to explain everything else. I was afraid I might believe him because I needed…” She pressed her lips together. “But now I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that I outlived my usefulness a long time ago, and I was only kept around for amusement.”

Solid stone is just sand and water, baby

After a long moment of silence, Jason cleared his throat. “Can I—Can I give you a ride somewhere?”

No. Taking a ride from Jason Morgan when her life had shattered four years ago had been the reason she was in this mess. For her own sanity, she could not let him be her sounding board. He already thought her to be pathetic, to be desperate, if he knew she was pregnant by Ric, he’d feel sorry for her. He’d pity her.

And she really would throw herself into the harbor at that point.

“No.” When her voice was weak, she forced herself to take a deep breath. “No. Thank you for being concerned, but I think that sometimes the truth is better…” She looked at him now, for the first time, meeting those beautiful eyes that had broken her heart. “Sometimes the truth is better, even when it’s harsh. I have no illusions left.” Another tear escaped her eye, and she found her lips curving into a smile. “I never mattered at all.”

Sand and water and a million years gone by

Corinthos Penthouse: Living Room

Sonny Corinthos was going to have to start tricking his wife with healthy cookies or almond ice cream. He’d found another bag of Oreos tucked under the sofa. He was going to have ferret out who was smuggling this contraband into his home. Carly was going to have the safest pregnancy he could provide, and nutrition was the only thing under his control.

Or at least he’d thought so.

He was searching under the cushions for any other junk food, particularly candy bars because they would fit without changing the shape when Max Giambetti knocked briskly and then opened the door. “Boss, its Jason.”

Sonny got to his feet, holding the Oreos by the corner of the package. “You’re not Carly’s dealer are you?” he asked, tossing them on the coffee table. He glanced over at Jason as he entered and faltered. “What’s wrong?”

“Um…” Jason scrubbed his hands over his face. “I’m just tired, Sonny. It’s been a rough week.” He looked around the penthouse. “Where’s Carly?”

“She took Michael to see Bobbie. They’re having dinner there.” Bobbie. Could she be behind this processed sugar? He pushed Carly’s food choice aside. Jason looked tired, but more than that… Sonny cleared his throat. “Jason, what happened?”

“I…” Jason hesitated. He exhaled slowly and looked at Sonny. “I was near the Elm Street Pier, and I saw Faith Roscoe with Ric.”

Sonny scowled. “Well, we suspected he was working with her.” He walked towards the mini bar and poured himself a whiskey. “What’d you overhear?”

“Ah…” Behind him, he heard Jason’s voice falter. Sonny turned, the tumbler in his hand. Jason rubbed the back of his neck, and Sonny realized that Jason looked tired, but he looked pissed and sad as well. “It was a variation of what we heard at Kelly’s.”

Sonny closed his eyes. He’d been so angry that night Carly had finally divulged to him what had happened at her club opening. She didn’t think she’d actually slept with Ric, but she’d been afraid of Sonny’s reaction. Sonny had torn out of the house to track the son of a bitch down and Jason had followed to keep Sonny out of serious trouble.

They’d cornered Ric in the courtyard and Sonny had gone for his throat. He could still hear the mocking laughter in his voice as Ric taunted him. Sonny had demanded answers—why was Ric coming for him, for his family?

And he’d learned the disgusting truth. That Ric Lansing was his mother’s son, by an affair with her boss. He’d blamed Sonny for pushing her down the steps while she was pregnant, forcing Trevor Lansing to tell Adela to choose between her sons.

Sonny sighed, the heavy breath whooshing out from his lips as he remembered the rest of the conversation, and why Jason would be so upset. “He talked about Elizabeth again.”

“Yeah.” Jason cast his eyes away. “But it was…Sonny, she heard us that night. At Kelly’s.”

Sonny tightened his grip on his tumbler. “We never looked inside. Kelly’s was supposed to be closed.”

I didn’t have much choice but use Carly. I thought it might be amusing to pick up Morgan’s ex-girlfriend, but he didn’t seem to give a damn. It’s about leverage, Sonny, and Carly gave me more than Elizabeth Webber. But man, it sure was fun.

“Damn it,” Sonny hissed. “He’s slime, and believe me…” He pressed his free hand to his chest. “If—if he were anyone else, Jason, he’d already be gone for what he did to Elizabeth and Carly.”

“Sonny, she was there again today,” Jason continued. “Around the corner. Ric and Faith were on the docks, and Faith threatened to do something to Elizabeth if she thought Ric actually gave a damn.” His face twisted into a grimace. “And the way he talked about her…” He closed his eyes. “They walked further onto the pier, but I didn’t want to follow and press my luck. So I went up the stairs, and Sonny…”

“Elizabeth had heard them. Found out Ric had Faith on the side.” Nausea welled up in Sonny’s stomach. This was his fault. To use Elizabeth that way, a young woman who had once been raped, it made him physically ill. “I would have spared her that. I’ve been trying to think of way to talk to her about Ric all week, but you know, I, uh…” He paused. “I didn’t think she’d listen to me anymore than she did the last time I tried. Or when you did.”

“She just looked so shattered,” Jason said softly, almost to himself. “You remember that night at the garage, when she thought Lucky was dead…and she just collapsed?”

“Yeah,” Sonny replied, hoarsely. He’d been standing just behind her as Lieutenant Marcus Taggart explained that the subway token Elizabeth held in her hand had been found on the body. She had just sunk to the ground, as if she could no longer support her own weight.

“That look in her eyes,” Jason continued. “She had it again today. And you know, she told me she didn’t blame me.” He exhaled, his breath almost shaky. “But I blame myself. If it hadn’t been for me, he never would have focused on her—”

Sonny sighed and sipped the whiskey, feeling the burn slide down his throat. “I hope the Families torture him before they kill him,” he muttered. He looked at Jason. “I’ll let them know that despite my newfound relation to the man, I don’t give a damn about his life. I—” He fisted his hand. “I can’t be the one to order his death, Jason. I can’t do that, and I know you think less of me—”

“No…” Jason shook his head. “I get…I get it.” He cleared his throat. “But you’ve got no problems with the Families taking care of it?”

“Not a damned one. He made a mistake there.” Sonny threw back the rest of his whiskey. “He thought he could weaken them, sabotage their operations, embezzle money while screwing with my head, he made his bed there. Until this week, I was just gonna…” He waved his hand, dismissively. “Let them take care of it in their own time. He wasn’t much of a problem. But now?”

After seeing the tears in his wife’s eyes, trying to explain why she’d needed to order a paternity test, apologizing for a night she just couldn’t remember. After learning of the way he’d used Elizabeth…

“As far as I’m concerned, he’s a dead man.” Sonny set his tumbler down. “Did Elizabeth say whether she’d broken things off with him?”

“She said not yet,” Jason answered. “Sonny, until Ric is…dealt with…”

“Say no more.” Sonny held up a hand. “I had Francis on her that year you were in her studio and then for a couple of months after you left that first time. I’ll tell him keep an eye out.”

Under your breath I hear your soft voice break 
Can we still be friends 
I hear you talking but you’re just not making sense 
I’ve been hoping for a happy ending 
Now I know that there won’t be any 
– A Few Words Too Many (Billie Myers)

Sunday, April 13, 2003

Kelly’s: Courtyard

Emily Bowen-Quartermaine sipped her iced tea and perused her anatomy textbook, waiting out Elizabeth’s shift. Her friend had been avoiding her all week—avoiding everyone really, as far as she could tell—and today was the day Emily pinned her down about it.

She turned a page and reflected at how different their friendship seemed to be now that Emily was home. They’d called, emailed and written each other while Emily had been in rehab in Arizona, and then at UCLA last year, but Emily had abruptly cut off all contact for almost three months last year after Elizabeth had admitted to sleeping with Zander Smith.

Emily wrinkled her nose, thinking about it again. Nothing bothered her more than thinking of the two of them together, and the only way she could look Elizabeth in the eye was if she put that completely out of her head.

Finally, Elizabeth emerged from the diner, a large tote bag over her shoulder. She tucked in green apron inside and took the seat across from Emily. Smiling wanly, she set the bag on the ground. “Hey.”

“Hey.” Emily took a deep breath. She was still best friends with Elizabeth. If she just ignored how angry she was about Zander, then she could get through this. If she pretended everything was good between them, then eventually it would be. She marked her page and closed the book, leaning back in her chair. “You look like crap.”

“Thanks.” Elizabeth rubbed her eyes. “I haven’t really been sleeping.”

Emily smiled brightly. “Is Ric keeping you awake?” she teased, but was surprised when any color the other woman had possessed faded from her cheeks. “Liz?”

“I’m…” Elizabeth hesitated, twisting the napkin in front of her. “I’m not seeing him anymore.”

“Oh.” Emily frowned. “He seemed really nice, you know. And I thought you liked him.”

“Yeah…” Elizabeth sighed. “Well, I think maybe it was just too soon for me to get involved with someone seriously.” She bit down on her lower lip. “Em…I’m pregnant.”

Emily blinked. “But you just said you broke up with Ric.” She furrowed her brow. “I don’t understand, Elizabeth. I mean, maybe he’s not perfect, but he was really nice to you. And you need to move on. You know you do. You’re pregnant.” She nodded firmly. “You should give him another chance. Don’t…don’t give up too quickly.”

“I know I need to move on,” Elizabeth murmured. “It’s just not as easy as you might think.” She exhaled slowly, and Emily resisted the urge to roll her eyes. “There are reasons I can’t…I can’t be with Ric.”

“Liz.” Emily hesitated, but decided the blunt truth was for the best. “Look, I totally know what it’s like to love someone who doesn’t love you back. It really sucks, but you can’t sit around pining for Jason. My brother, even if he really was that interested, is dating Courtney now.”

Elizabeth stared at her for a moment, as if confused by her words. “If he really was that interested…?” she repeated faintly.

Nope, Emily was not going to feed into this. She’d become friendly with Courtney Matthews since coming home, and it was clear that Jason had been interested in the blonde all last fall, long before Elizabeth had moved out of the penthouse. “Liz, I know you were staying at the penthouse, but that was to protect Zander. It’s not like you were living together.”

“I…” Elizabeth twisted her fingers together. “We talked about it…”

“You know Jason’s a man of action. If he wanted to be with you, he would,” Emily assured her. “Look at everything he did for Courtney.” Guilt settled in her stomach as Elizabeth’s cheeks flushed. “I’m not trying to hurt you, but I just…I want you to live in reality.”

“I know…I know you’re right about one thing,” Elizabeth said after a long moment. “If Jason wanted to be with me, he would.” She looked away. “I ruined it, and maybe he was trying to be nice when he told me it was too dangerous.” Her lips twisted. “It’s not too dangerous for Courtney, clearly.”

“The sooner you face the truth, the better off you’ll be.” Emily nodded firmly. “So if you’re pregnant, you should tell Ric and give him the opportunity to be the man you deserve.” Pleased, she stowed her text in her bag. “I’m glad we could talk about this honestly. You know I only want you to be happy.”

“I know.” But Elizabeth wouldn’t meet her eyes. Emily thought they might need to have this conversation once or twice more before Elizabeth really understood that her brother was out of her life for good. Emily was aware just how Elizabeth ruined her chance with Jason. After screwing with him two years earlier, she’d jerked him around again last summer, and probably slept with Zander to make him jealous.

Jason was better off, and one day, Elizabeth would find someone who would remind her how nice she used to be. Emily missed the girl who’d been dating Lucky. That Elizabeth had been her best friend, and Emily wanted her back.

Elm Street Pier

Elizabeth stopped at the bottom of the steps and took a moment to sit on the bench, closing her eyes and trying to force the conversation with Emily out of her head. She knew that her friendship with Jason’s sister would suffer a little considering what had happened last summer, but somehow she thought they would be able to get it back, rebuild it.

Emily had come home without warning the month before, and though they’d tried to be close again, it had felt hollow. Elizabeth had gone to a few dinners with Emily, Lucky and Nikolas, and it just felt like the four of them felt they should be friends like they had been four years ago and if they spent enough time together, it would feel natural again.

Despite Emily’s coolness, Elizabeth knew that she couldn’t blame Emily for trying to push her back to Ric. Emily didn’t know all the information. And even if the words had hurt…she needed to be reminded that the relationship she thought she’d been building with Jason really had been in her head.

“I knew I’d finally track you down.”

Elizabeth’s eyes snapped open as she saw Ric stepping off the bottom stair, with a grin on his face. Oh, she was going to be sick right here in front of him, she just knew it.

Ric continued towards her and Elizabeth fought the urge to get up and run. “You haven’t returned my phone calls all week.” He stopped in front of the bench and slid his hands in the pockets of his light tan khakis. “What’s going on, Beautiful?”

Elizabeth squared her shoulders and stood. Time to channel her inner Lizzie Webber. That annoying smart-ass was still inside, somewhere. She was sure of it. “Can’t take a hint, Ric?” she asked coolly.

She watched his narrow, and wonder how stupid she’d been to miss the calculation in those brown eyes. “A hint?” he repeated, his tone matching hers.

Elizabeth tightened her grip on her tote bag slung over her shoulder. “Usually,” she bit out, “when someone stops returning calls and texts, they’re trying to brush you off.”

She took a step towards the other side of the docks, towards her studio, but he stepped in front of her. “Whoa, what changed, Elizabeth?” He put his hands up, preventing her from darting to the side. “I thought we were having a good time—”

“Well, you thought wrong.” Elizabeth tossed head back, her hair swinging over her shoulder. “So I’m going to leave now, Ric, and you’re going to let me.”

He took a step towards her, and Elizabeth felt it necessary to step back, feeling her ire fade and her nerves kick in. This was the man who was in league with Faith Roscoe. Maybe she should have handled this differently. “Listen, Ric—”

“You’ve been talking to Sonny or Jason.” She tried to keep her expression level, her eyes unchanged, but there must have been something, because his lips pressed together. “Jason. He told you something. Now, you know you can’t trust him—”

“It has nothing to do with Sonny or Jason. They’ve told me nothing,” Elizabeth cut in. Maybe they would have warned her again, had Jason not seen her two days earlier, almost in a fetal position, after hearing the truth. “I can make my own decisions—”

“No, no…” Ric wagged a finger at her. “They’ve poisoned you against me, Elizabeth. I can’t believe you’d trust them after everything Jason has done.” He stepped towards her, voice softening. “I know he broke your heart, Elizabeth, but I care about you—”

“I would like you to leave me alone,” Elizabeth said. She tried to step around him again, but again Ric stepped in front her. Oh, God. What was she going to do if he didn’t move? Could she run? If she turned and ran the way she came, back up the stairs…could she get away? “Ric, please let me walk away.”

“No, I want to know what they said to make you run away from me,” Ric snarled, all charm vanished from his voice. His face changed, and Elizabeth knew she was seeing the Ric Lansing now, all layers of charm stripped away. “What did they tell you, Elizabeth?” He reached for her arm, and Elizabeth stumbled back.

“Nothing,” Elizabeth repeated, struggling to keep her voice level. “Ric, I’m telling you the truth. I haven’t talked to Sonny or Jason in weeks.”

“Right,” Ric drawled. “Well, that’s certainly possible since we both know they’ve basically forgotten your existence.”

Nausea was climbing up her throat, and Elizabeth thought this was a hell of a time to be suffering that morning sickness that never seemed to happen in the morning. He could not, absolutely could not, see her getting sick.

Ric could never find out about this baby. This conversation had sealed the deal on that.

“It’s true we’re not close anymore,” Elizabeth said, slowly, “but I’m sure if I needed them, I could ask for help.” When Ric just smirked, Elizabeth took a small step back. Get close to the steps. Maybe she could kick him and then run. “But I don’t need them, because they’ve said nothing to me, okay? I just…” She licked her lips. “I just don’t want to date you anymore. Why isn’t that enough?”

“Because you’re lying to me. Sonny told you something, I know he did.” Ric reached out for her, and Elizabeth stumbled back again. She was lifting her leg to kick him in the knees, just like Jason taught her once, when boots clattered down the steps like a freight train.

Before Elizabeth could really process what was happening, Jason had passed her, grabbed Ric by the throat and sent him sprawling on the docks. She just blinked.

“You just don’t know when to quit, do you?” Jason snarled. He reached for Ric again, to do what, Elizabeth couldn’t imagine, but Ric crawled away frantically. “Sonny told you to get the hell out of town.”

“I knew it,” Ric hissed, glaring at her, rising to his feet. “I knew Jason told you everything—”

“Told me what?” Elizabeth said, feeling some of Lizzie filter back in. “That I’m amusing and it’s entertaining to screw Jason Morgan’s ex-bed buddy? To pretend to sleep with Carly because sleeping with me wasn’t giving you enough leverage?” She raised an eyebrow. “Is that what you think they told me?”

Ric stared at her, and Elizabeth was stunned at the loathing that crept into his expression. He took a step forward, but a growl from Jason stopped him. “You would believe them—”

“They didn’t have to tell me.” Elizabeth folded her arms across her chest. “No one bothered to check to see if Kelly’s was empty. I was closing when you decided to tell your half-brother all the details.”

“Elizabeth,” Jason said quietly, looking at her. “Francis is at the top of the stairs. He’ll walk you back to the studio.”

“Oh, so she can leave me here and you can deal with me?” Ric growled. “Don’t bother.” He sent Elizabeth another glare, and disappeared into the shadows.

Elizabeth released a breath, and lowered herself to sit on the bottom step of the stairs, wishing she could just disappear. “Well, go ahead and yell at me.”

She felt Jason sit next to her. “Why would I yell?”

She opened her eyes, but didn’t dare look at him. “At least an I told you so would probably suffice. I wouldn’t be in this position if I had just…” She sighed, remembering her conversation with Emily. “If I had just kept my head on straight.” Elizabeth stood and bit her lip. “Thank you for getting rid of him.”

“He might come back and harass you,” Jason warned. “He’s in trouble with…” He looked away. “He’s in trouble with people who aren’t in Sonny’s position, so it might not be a problem for too much longer.”

“Hmm…” Elizabeth nodded, understanding. Well, then maybe Ric would be out of her life before he could find out she was pregnant. “Well, let’s hope that’s true.” Her stomach rolled in protest and she wondered if she was going make it to her studio. She could not get sick in front Jason. “I’m going to get going. I, ah…” She smiled weakly. “I’m not feeling that great, so…”

“I’ll walk you back to your studio,” Jason said, taking a step towards her but Elizabeth shook her head. Because that would be a disaster.

“No, no. Um.” She licked her lips. “That’s really not necessary, okay? I don’t think…” She cast her eyes up the top of the stairs. “Maybe Francis can walk me. It’s not far.” She frowned and then looked back at him. “How did you know I was down here?”

When Jason looked away, Elizabeth felt a little of her ire at him fade. Despite everything, maybe he still thought of her as a friend. “Francis called you because he’s watching me.”

“Ah…” Jason dipped his chin to his chest. “Yeah. After Friday…I figured you’d be breaking things off with Ric, so I just…” He jerked a shoulder. “Sonny thought it was the least we could do.” He paused. “Since it’s really our fault Ric targeted you.”

Immediately, the warmth in her stomach faded. Pity. Guilt. No, that fit her life much more. “No, it’s my fault,” Elizabeth said, firmly. She was not going to let them take this on. “Maybe he sought me out because we used to be friends, but I didn’t have to date him.” She sighed. “And maybe his research should have been better. I’m sure he’s pissed he wasted all those months asking me questions.”

Jason frowned. “He asked you questions? About us?” He paused. “About me and Sonny, I mean.”

“Yeah, which should have been my first sign.” Elizabeth rubbed her forehead, forcing the bile down. “But you know, I thought the threat would come with explosives or guns, not questions from someone who said I was beautiful.” Shut up, Elizabeth. Shut up. “Anyway, you don’t have to worry. I don’t know anything, and even if I did, I wouldn’t say anything.” She straightened her shoulders. “I don’t want you feeling guilty. I got myself into this situation, and I don’t need you get me out of it.” She hesitated. “I may need you to throw Ric around again, but other than that…I can take care of myself.”

“Okay.” Jason nodded slowly. “Well, if you don’t want me to walk you home, then…I’ll get Francis.” After another moment, he walked passed her and started up the stairs.

The last thing she needed was more time in Jason’s company. She would rather jump in the harbor. She just needed Ric to get out of town, and then figure out the best way to support herself and a baby.

And figure out what to tell people about the father. No one could ever know about Ric. She had to protect her child.

Don’t know where she belongs, where she belongs
She wants to go home, but nobody’s home
It’s where she lies, broken inside
With no place to go, no place to go to dry her eyes.
Broken inside
– Nobody’s Home, Avril Lavigne

Tuesday, April 15, 2003

Kelly’s Courtyard

Lucky Spencer closed his arms around Elizabeth’s shoulders and squeezed her tight. “I’m going to miss you guys.” He drew back and reached for Emily’s hand with a broad smile. “But I’m glad Nikolas and I waited to head to London. We might have missed you otherwise, Em, and I would have hated that.”

“Well, I was excited to get the Musketeers together for a few reunions,” Emily replied, her hand on Nikolas’s shoulder. “It won’t be the same without you guys.”

Elizabeth cleared her throat and smiled at her two oldest friends, though their friendships had been difficult over the last year. “It really won’t. I was just getting used to all four of us in the same city again.”

“But it’d be selfish to ask you to stay,” Emily said, her voice almost sharp. Elizabeth frowned at her, but Emily never met her eyes. “You should be with Laura now that she’s getting better. I’m so glad you guys are taking Lesley and Lulu with you. You know she’ll recover so much faster with everyone in the same place.”

As if missing the underlying tension, Nikolas squeezed Emily’s hand. “Well, you’ll be here to take care of each other and carry on our Kelly’s traditions.”

After a few more hugs, the brothers started for the parking lot, leaving Elizabeth and Emily standing alone in the courtyard. Elizabeth looked over at Emily, who was staring after the others, wistfully.

“I’m glad Laura is showing some improvement,” Elizabeth said, breaking the silence. “It’s hard to think of her like that, locked inside her own mind.”

“I know,” Emily murmured. “She was always so wonderful to me, like a second mother.” She folded her arms across her chest and turned towards the doors. “Are you working today?”

“I had the opening shift,” Elizabeth answered. “So I’m done now.” She hesitated. “Do you…want to get some lunch?” Her throat was thick. “I could really use a friend right now.”

“I would,” Emily said, biting her lip, “but I’m meeting Courtney.” She tucked her hair behind her ears. “Do you want to join us? You guys should really start working past—”

“I’m not really in the mood to have this conversation,” Elizabeth replied. She rubbed her eyes. She still had so much to figure out, and she just…she just couldn’t find it in her to tell Emily how much she really needed her right now. She wasn’t sure Emily would hear her.

“All right,” Emily said, shrugging. “Well, I guess I’ll see you later.”

“I guess so.” Elizabeth waited another moment, but finally left the courtyard. She no longer had the patience to pretend she and Emily were as close as ever, when the truth was…Elizabeth had never felt further away from her.

Kelly’s: Dining Room

Emily set her bag down at an empty table to wait for Courtney. She wished Elizabeth had joined them for lunch. She knew Courtney and Elizabeth had been friendly before, and if Elizabeth could just see how much more suited Courtney was for Jason, she’d really start getting past her feelings.

She had no doubt what Elizabeth had wanted to talk about—Emily had thought of the pregnancy news for days, wondering what Elizabeth intended to do. Emily hoped Elizabeth would confide in Ric—he clearly had monetary resources to support a child, and Emily didn’t think her friend was being all that realistic about her options. Maybe Ric wasn’t the love of her life, but Emily thought that entire concept was a fallacy anyway.

No one fell in love forever.

She was tugging her anatomy textbook from her bag when she saw Ric emerge from the back, having come down from his room. He looked annoyed when he sat at the counter, perusing a menu she was sure he’d memorized. She didn’t know what the problem was with the man. He was handsome and charming, and while he seemed to be focused on getting a job connected to Sonny and Carly, Emily didn’t think that was too awful. It meant Ric was ambitious, that he wanted to make money.

Elizabeth could do worse, Emily decided, and to prove to herself that Elizabeth’s happiness and well-being was still a top priority, she grabbed her bag and abandoned her table for the counter. “Hey. I’m not sure we’ve been introduced,” she said.

Ric glanced at her, and she was surprised at the irritation in his eyes. “I know who you are,” he said shortly. He sipped the coffee Penny had just served him. “And I’m not in the mood for any sanctimonious lectures from Jason Morgan’s little sister or Elizabeth’s best friend.”

Elizabeth must have already broken up with him. Emily took a seat and signaled to Penny that she wanted her usual chamomile tea. “I know you and Liz are having some difficulties,” she said, and winced when Ric snorted. Elizabeth really had burned her bridges, but Emily wasn’t deterred. “She’s just…confused right now. It’s been a tough year for her, and I think you’re exactly what she needs.”

Ric set his coffee down and twisted on the stool to fully face her. “Just…what did Elizabeth tell you about us?” he asked.

“She was thinking of breaking up with you,” Emily answered, spooning some sugar into her tea. “I told her that she shouldn’t be too hasty.” She flashed a smile at her friend’s boyfriend. “I know it might not seem like it right now, but Elizabeth is usually warm and generous. She’s just…it’s been a bad year.” She leaned forward, lowering her voice. “And she really needs the support right now, Ric. No woman should have to face something like this alone.”

His dark brow furrowed and Ric tilted his head to the side. “Face what?” he asked softly.

Emily had no intention of telling him outright Elizabeth was pregnant—that was not her place, but she felt a responsibility to Elizabeth to keep her from making a major mistake, so hints were okay. She cleared her throat. “It’s not something I should be telling you, but I would ask Elizabeth.”

She saw the door swing open and Courtney walked in. Reaching down to grab her bag, and picking up her tea with the other hand, Emily smiled again at him. “I’m serious, Ric. It’s important that you don’t let Elizabeth push you away right now.”

She slid into a chair at the table Courtney had set her things on, and smiled. “Hey!”

“Hey.” Courtney eyed Ric at the counter, and her gaze turned wary as he stood and walked past her without a word. “Why were you talking to Ric Lansing?” She lowered herself into the other chair and turned her coffee cup over.

“Just giving him some encouragement.” Emily sipped her tea. “Elizabeth is pushing him away, but I can’t let her do that. She needs to move on, Courtney, you know that.”

“I know…” Courtney grimaced. “And I hope she does, because I like her, which I know she wouldn’t believe. And I get how easy it is to fall in love with Jason.” She smiled now, as if lit from inside from her happiness. “And he is a wonderful friend, so it must be hard for her to lose that, but I wouldn’t…” She shook her head, her smile dimming. “I wouldn’t wish Ric Lansing on my worst enemy, much less someone I like.”

Emily fisted her hand under the table. “What’s wrong with him?” she asked, irritated. “Elizabeth wouldn’t tell me why she was breaking up with him and now you’re saying these things….he manages Carly’s club, he helped get Jason and Brenda acquitted. What’s wrong with him?” she repeated. She was so tired of being on the outside. This was why Elizabeth was irritating now—because she only told Emily what she thought Emily ought to know, and never the full truth.

“I can’t…” Courtney looked up as Penny poured coffee into her cup. “Thanks, Penny.” When the waitress left, she sighed. “I can’t really talk about it, but if my brother told Elizabeth half of what I think he should have, then Elizabeth should have left a vapor trail in her rush to get away.”

Oh, no. “Is he really that bad?” Emily asked, feeling light-headed. What if he was an awful person who would just hurt Elizabeth and drive all those wonderful qualities she missed so much deeper under the surface? “I just…encouraged him to pursue her.”

“Em…” Courtney shook her head. “That’s just…that’s not a good idea. Jason and Sonny want him out of town, and if Elizabeth knows what they know, she’s just going to resist.” She sat back. “And that’s just going to make it worse.”

And Emily had just hinted to Ric Elizabeth was pregnant. Oh, man. Uneasy, Emily looked towards the door and felt nauseous. Maybe she hadn’t read the situation correctly.

“Maybe it’ll be okay,” Emily said softly. “Maybe she can just get rid of him again.”

“I hope so.” Courtney picked up her tea spoon and tapped it restlessly against her mug. “Because my brother and Jason are going to feel obligated to help since they blame themselves for Ric.” She pressed her lips together. “And the last thing I want is Elizabeth to get involved with Jason again in anyway.”

“Well, it’s not like it would matter,” Emily said. “You said they were never really together, that you and Jason were falling in love when Elizabeth thought they were together. Jason wasn’t really interested.” And she wanted Elizabeth to have access to protection if Ric was as awful as people seemed to think.

Courtney shifted and looked away. “I may have…glossed over a few things,” she admitted. “I know he cared for her, but I didn’t get the impression they were actually dating. He never said anything to me about it and we were together enough, I would have known. And you know, I made Jason promise I wasn’t a rebound.” She placed her hand flat on the table. “It’s just better if…Jason doesn’t think Elizabeth needs help. I don’t…want to take any chances.”

“Right.” Emily frowned, troubled by Courtney’s explanation of the facts and wondering how much of what she thought had happened last summer and last fall was actually true.

Corinthos & Morgan Warehouse: Jason’s Office

The numbers on the ledgers were beginning to blur together as Jason struggled to keep his focus. Three days since he’d warned Ric to get out of town, and the scum was still in his room at Kelly’s as if nothing had changed. He really thought being Sonny’s half-brother offered him protection. Sonny didn’t want him evicted because it was easier to keep an eye on him this way, but Jason just wanted to shove him in the harbor with weights on his feet. He wanted the disgusting son of a bitch to sink to the bottom struggling to breath for what he had done to Carly, to Elizabeth.

He wasn’t a man who could picture things that well, but he would never forget the hitch in Carly’s breath, the tears on her cheeks as she promised Sonny she hadn’t slept with Ric for revenge, that she honestly didn’t remember anything and that her skin felt dirty for just having been in bed with him. Carly was his best friend, for all her faults, and just for that scene alone, he wanted to dismember Ric Lansing.

But the look in Elizabeth’s eyes last Friday, as she sat on her knees, her arms wrapped around her torso as if that action alone could hold her together. She had refused to meet his eyes as he’d crouched in front of her, and pulled her to her feet. Not until the last moment, making him wish he could go against Sonny’s orders. She was wrecked, as if nothing could put her back together. She hadn’t looked that way since they’d first met and now he was powerless to do anything about it.

He closed the books and reached for his phone when it lit up. Francis. “Morgan,” he said, clenching his free hand into a fist. “Is Elizabeth okay?”

“Uh…” Elizabeth’s guard sounded hesitant. “You told me not to intervene with Lansing unless he put a hand on her, but he’s tracked her down on the Elm Street Pier, and Jason, you’re gonna wanna get down here.”

Jason was already on his feet, heading for the doors. “Is he threatening her? I’m at the warehouse, I can be there in just a few minutes.”

“He’s not…but it’s not good. And it’s going to get worse. Get here fast.”

“If he lays a finger on her, throw him in the harbor. Sonny’s orders be damned.”

Elm Street Pier

Jason found Francis standing at the top of the stairs, watching the scene below intently. As he stepped up, he heard Elizabeth choking something out, the tone and the words themselves making him clench his fists even more. As he prepared to step in, Francis held out an arm.

“Just wait,” he murmured. “Miss Webber might have a plan and you know how angry she gets when you help and she doesn’t want it.”

“Ric, I am not pregnant. I don’t know where—”

“You’re telling me Emily lied to me? That’s bullshit, and you know it—”

Jason pushed Francis away, so he could have his own view, to see how close Ric was to Elizabeth. If she was pregnant, this situation had become much more dangerous.

Ric had Elizabeth cornered the edge of the harbor. She had backed up so much that any further step would send her into the still icy water. Her face was contorted in apprehension and wariness…but not fear. Not yet. “Ric, I am not having your child—”

“I told myself that I would never let my children grow up without me, that after what my mother did,” Ric snarled, “I would never let myself be separated.” He reached for her arm, and Jason tensed, ready to leap over the railing if he needed. “You aren’t keeping me out of this—”

“I’m not pregnant.” Now Elizabeth sounded desperate. “Please. I don’t know what Emily told you—”

“I got your records from the hospital!”

And in that second, Jason saw Elizabeth’s expression freeze. It was the truth. She was pregnant. His heart stopped.

“How did…” Her voice faltered, and she glanced behind her, as if gauging the water’s proximity. She turned back and sighed, looking annoyed. “You’re lying.”

“You’re not as smart as you think you are.” Ric grabbed her arm. “If you think you’re keeping me from my child—”

“It’s not your child! You’re not the father!” Elizabeth cried, trying to jerk away from him, but she stumbled and almost slipped in. The time to stop watching this was over, and Jason started to move forward.

“Oh, the hell it’s not. Who else could it be?” Ric demanded.

If Jason could have had another moment to really think about his next actions, about the repercussions, then maybe he wouldn’t have done it. But there were only seconds, and so Jason made his decision.

He stormed down the steps, and grabbed Ric’s free hand, twisting it behind his back. “Who do you think?” he growled. “Let her go.”

Ric released Elizabeth and Jason sent him flying backwards. Francis placed a foot on his chest to keep Ric planted on the ground. His face impassive, he looked at Jason. “What should I do to him?”

“Hold him there a second.” Jason turned to Elizabeth, who was staring at him like she’d never seen him before. “Elizabeth. Are you all right?”

“I…” Her throat worked, but she never said anything else. She just stared at him.

“I don’t believe you,” Ric grunted. “You’re lying to protect her.”

“Let him up,” Jason told Francis. When the bastard was standing again, Jason started for him, his heart pounding. Ric had to believe this. He had to believe Elizabeth was not having his child. He needed to leave town and get the hell away from Elizabeth. He would if there was no child to hold him here. “I don’t lie. It’s my baby. Why do you think she didn’t tell you?” He glanced back at Elizabeth, meeting her eyes. Play along. They’d figure out the next step later, but in this moment, she had to play along.

“I’ve…” Elizabeth swallowed. “I’ve known for a few weeks,” she admitted. “Before what happened at Kelly’s and on the docks last week.” She forced herself to look at Ric. “And back then I thought you were a good guy, so I—I didn’t know how to tell you, and Jason and I—” She looked back at him and he nodded slightly. “We d-didn’t know how to handle it. It’s…not an easy situation.” She wrapped her arms around herself. “And I felt guilty.” Her face hardened, as if she remembered now why it had to happen this way. “And now I just feel sick I ever let you touch me.”

“You goddamn whore!” Ric started forward, but Jason had him by the throat and against the pillar of the docks.

“Keep doing this, Lansing. By all means,” he growled. He wanted Lansing to come at him, wanted to have an excuse to wipe him from the Earth. Sonny wouldn’t quibble with self-defense. “Keep coming at me, the people I love and I’ll forget I work for Sonny.”

“Jason,” Elizabeth said, her hand soft on his shoulder. “You have to let him go. Anyone could see here.” She was right, but it felt so good to have his hand around this bastard’s throat that he squeezed hard once more before releasing him.

“Get out of town, Lansing. Because I don’t know how much Sonny is going to be able to protect you if you go after Elizabeth again.”

Ric glared at them and then looked at Elizabeth with such hatred that Jason stepped in front of her. “You think this is over?” He chucked, the sound harsh and twisted. “You have no idea what I’m capable of.”

He disappeared into the shadows of the docks, his footsteps fading away. Finally, Jason squared his shoulders and looked at Elizabeth.

“Jason.” Elizabeth wrapped one hand around her waist, and then other fisted at her mouth, tears sliding down her cheeks. “What…”

“Not here.” He looked at Francis. “We’re going to the penthouse. Follow, make sure Lansing doesn’t.” He took Elizabeth’s elbow and steered her towards the steps.

“Jason,” Elizabeth said, turning to him at the top of the stairs. Her face was white, her eyes large and still full of fear. “What have we done?”

I’m finding my way back to sanity again
Though I don’t really know what
I’m going to do when I get there
Take a breath and hold on tight
Spin around one more time
– Breathing, Lifehouse

Tuesday, April 15, 2003

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

Jason pushed open the door and signaled for Elizabeth to go inside. He turned to Francis. “No one gets past you. No interruptions. I don’t care what Sonny or anyone else says.” He hesitated and glanced at Elizabeth, who was doing her best to keep her face expressionless when all she wanted to do was dissolve into a puddle of nothing. “And it goes without saying that you heard nothing on the docks that you didn’t already know to be the truth. That’s why you were assigned last week, got it?”

“Message received.” Francis nodded and took up his station at the door.

As soon as Jason closed the door, Elizabeth felt her composure leave her. She sank onto the sofa, his words were ringing in her head. I don’t lie. It’s my baby.

“Elizabeth,” Jason began, putting his hands at his waist, but he said nothing else, and she knew exactly how he felt. How the hell had they gotten into this mess and how were they going to get out?

“It’s not that I don’t…” Elizabeth twisted her fingers together. God, she couldn’t look at him. “I appreciate you stepping in because I wasn’t sure…” Restless, she got to her feet and started to pace.

“I know this…this is a mess,” Jason said. She turned and just stared at him.

“You don’t think that’s a bit of an understatement?” Her arms wrapped around her torso, her fingers tapping her on arm. She wanted to jump out of her skin. “Let’s…let’s go back here a minute. You told Sonny’s half-brother that you…” She couldn’t even say the words. “Oh my God, Jason. What are we going to do?” Her eyes widened. “You have to get Sonny and Carly…and Courtney right now and tell them the truth. He’s going to head straight for Courtney or Carly, you just know it.”

“No.” Jason shook his head, pained. “No, we can’t tell them.”

“I…” Her hands slid to her sides, as if boneless. “What do you mean we can’t tell them?” Her voice had climbed almost to a squeak, and she struggled to take a deep breath. “Of course we have to tell them. Ric is going to tell everyone he sees what just happened!”

“Maybe…maybe not.” But Elizabeth could see Jason didn’t believe a word of that. “Maybe he’ll get out of town. I made it clear that he goes after you again, I’m not gonna care what Sonny said.”

“And if he were a normal and logical person, that might have worked,” Elizabeth retorted. She dragged her hands her hair and turned towards the windows. “We can tell them it’s a lie, that it’s not…that you’re not…” She swallowed hard and turned back. “I’ll tell them it’s Lucky’s. I can call him, he’s on his way to London, but I bet he’d help—”

“We can’t bring anyone else into this.” Jason strode forward and took her by the shoulders. “Elizabeth, I know you’re upset and you’re scared, but we need…” He paused and slid his hands down her shoulders to take her hands. “We need to focus. No one but the two of us can know the truth. Even Francis doesn’t really know what he heard isn’t the truth.”

“Jason, we cannot lie to our family, to the people who love us.” She hated how shaky her voice was and the tears were sliding down her cheeks. “We can’t. Do you know what people will think?”

“I…” He nodded. “Yeah. They’re going to think we cheated on the people we were seeing.” He squeezed her hands. “But we need to keep you and your child safe.”

Right. That was paramount, and Elizabeth could understand that somewhere inside, but in this moment, she could only see the problems. The damage. “Jason, you cannot let Courtney believe you did this to her.” She closed her eyes. “You have to tell her the truth, she’s going to be so hurt—”

“I know she is.” His hands fell from hers, and already she was aching the loss of his strength. “But I learned the hard way that things like this…they work when no one else knows.” His eyes darkened and Jason looked away, clearing his throat. “I told Robin about Michael being AJ’s son because I didn’t want her to think I had slept with Carly while we were together. I didn’t want to hurt her.”

“And she told AJ,” Elizabeth said. She sighed and rubbed her eyebrow. “Okay. Okay. But that was different, right? Courtney hates Ric, too. For what he did to Carly. She’ll understand that no one can know. We’ll just…” She stopped when he shook his head.

“We can’t take that chance.” He leaned against the pool table. “I know I’m asking you for a lot—”

“Are you insane?” Elizabeth cut in. “You’re the one who stands to lose in this, Jason.” Her heart was racing, and her skin was clammy. “I get why this works for me, but you’re the one who’s going to lie to his family. Jason, I can’t ask you to do this. It’s insanity. There has to be another way—”

“You heard Ric on those docks.” Jason shook his head and looked at her. God, he was so upset, and she knew it was because she wasn’t agreeing to this plan. There was no way she could, because he wasn’t seeing how it was going to end. How it was going to kill them both. “He has to believe this isn’t his child, or he’ll come back for it or you. And when he doesn’t need you anymore…” He pressed his lips together and clenched his fists. “You can’t ask me not to do whatever I can to keep you safe.”

She had a troubling premonition that he wasn’t going to let her talk him out of this. “Jason, what if Ric doesn’t go away?” she asked softly. “I know you can’t really talk about it, but I know he’s in trouble with the other Families, that they’re looking for him.” Elizabeth tilted her head. “You’re counting on this not being a long-term solution, and it might just be for a little while.”

“If the Families know what’s good for them,” Jason began, but stopped. He wouldn’t say it to her, she knew it. “Ric shouldn’t be a problem for long. And after that, we can tell the truth.”

“So how long are we supposed to let the world think we’re having a child together?” Elizabeth pressed. “Weeks? You think that’s going to make it any better?” Her eyes burned. “You think Courtney’s going to forgive you for not trusting her with something like this? That’s what you’re doing. You’re telling her you don’t trust her to keep a short-term secret. You think that’s not going to hurt her? That Carly is just going to let it go? And Sonny…” Fresh tears burned as they slid down her face. “He’s your best friend, but he’s Courtney’s brother. Jason—”

“I wanted to tell you about Sonny,” Jason said, almost muttering the words, and she blinked.

“W-What?”

“That’s what you’re talking about.” Jason looked towards the doorway, as if remembering the night he’d come in and stumbled over her suitcase. “Me not trusting you with a short-term secret. You were so angry that I didn’t tell you—”

“It’s not about that, Jason.” She could not have this conversation now, not six months after it would have made a difference. If he’d just said those words that night instead of telling her it had nothing to do with her, oh God…

“I asked Sonny to tell you, I told him we could trust you, that you were…” He shook his head. “But he just wanted Carly to know. He said it was safer that way.”

Her hands were shaking, so she hid them behind her back. Why was he telling her this now? “Okay. Okay. But that’s…that’s not what this is about right now, okay. We’ve just…” She gestured out the window, as if the docks were just in the next room. “We just told a ticking time bomb that we had, at the very least, a one night stand, and created a child. What do we do if Ric disappears and goes underground?”

“We’ll find him,” Jason said. “He’s not going to hurt you again.”

She pressed her hand to her stomach, fighting the nausea. “Jason…”

“I know this isn’t a perfect solution,” Jason said. He straightened and crossed to her, stopping short of touching her, which she did not think she could handle right now. “We don’t have all the answers right now, but trust me…” He tilted her chin up so their eyes met. “You know I’m right, that no one can know. No one else matters but your child, and it’s safer if it’s just us.”

God, she couldn’t ignore that argument. She just couldn’t. He had trusted Robin once, and she’d blown his world apart. He’d known Robin as long as he could remember anything, and if Robin had done that to him…why wouldn’t Jason wonder if Courtney might as well. If he was willing to do this for her child, then how could she really argue?

“Okay,” she said softly, finding it difficult to look away from him. “I trust you. We won’t tell anyone.”

Relieved, he leaned down so his forehead brushed hers and if she weren’t already exhausted from tears, she would have wept for this moment. This one beautiful moment where they were totally in sync. Like they had been once.

He stepped away from her after a moment. “I want Francis to stay on you during the day, and I’ll put a guard on your studio door for the evening. I don’t want Ric to think for a moment you’re not being protected.” Jason took a deep breath. “We’ll just take everything else one day at time.”

“Okay.” She licked her lips. “Okay.” They stood there in awkward silence before she stepped forward. “I’m tired. Is it all right if I go home and rest now?”

“Yeah, yeah.” Jason scrubbed hand down his face. “You…you’ve been to a doctor? You’re okay, I mean?”

“Yeah.” Elizabeth hesitated. “I’m about five weeks along,” she said. “In case…in case we need to figure out…a story.”

“Okay.” Jason started for the door and turned back. “I promise you, Elizabeth, he’s not going to hurt you again,” he told her.

He sounded so determined, so convinced, that she could almost believe him.

Kelly’s Diner: Dining Room

“Hey.” Carly Corinthos smiled, spying her sister-in-law seated a table, picking at some fries. “I didn’t think you’d be here today.” She sat across from her.

“I had lunch with Emily.” Courtney shrugged. “But she had to run. She’s worried about Elizabeth.”

Carly frowned. “Why?” She hesitated. “Did Sonny tell her about Ric yet? Because I told him he should tell her, and repeat it several times so she listens this time.” Irritated, she snatched one of Courtney’s fries. “She can be thick-headed when she wants to be—”

“I don’t know but Elizabeth told Emily she was going to break up with him, and I guess Emily doesn’t know what a psycho he is.” Courtney shuddered. “So she encouraged Ric not to take no for an answer.”

Carly rolled her eyes. “And people say I butt in when I should stay out. What a sanctimonious little brat. I wish Elizabeth could have overheard exactly what Ric said at Kelly’s. I’m sure Sonny paraphrased to me to make it less…disgusting, but even his glossing over would make her nauseous. But if she doesn’t know, and was just breaking up with him…” Carly sighed. “I hope she doesn’t let his oily charm change her mind.”

“Well I just hope she doesn’t go back to Jason for help,” Courtney muttered. “He loves me now, but I don’t…he has a super hero complex, you know that.”

“Which is how you snagged him,” Carly reminded her, cross at the criticism of her best friend. Jason was a good guy who liked to help when he could. It didn’t mean he only fell in love when he was rescuing someone.

“I know she doesn’t mean anything to him anymore,” Courtney continued. “She drove him crazy when she wouldn’t listen to him about Ric—”

Carly sighed. “I think you should just let it go. I mean, Jason is not the type to cheat on anyone—”

Courtney bit her lip. “Well, I don’t know about that.” She glanced away. “I know we were attracted to each other while he was helping me last fall, when he stayed with me at my apartment, and you know Elizabeth was staying with him at that point. I think they were technically dating, but it didn’t…feel like they were.” She shrugged. “I know Jason told me he never loved her—”

At that Carly, raised her eyebrows. Not in love with her? Carly couldn’t stand Elizabeth Webber, but she remembered how frantic Jason had been to find her last summer, even going to Taggart, Edward and AJ. She’d seen Jason under pressure, looking for other people, but there’d been something in his demeanor, in the look in his eyes that told the world that if anything happened to Elizabeth on his account…

“Courtney, I—” She opened her mouth to defend Jason, because of course he hadn’t let himself be attracted to Courtney before things were over with Elizabeth. He wasn’t that kind of man. Except, how else to explain how quickly he’d moved on? Troubled, she closed her mouth.

The door to the restaurant flew open, and Ric stalked in. He drew up when he saw them, and Carly saw him narrow his eyes in malicious glee. “Oh, crap.” Carly reached for her purse, intent on making a hasty getaway.

“I am so relieved to find the two of you here.” Ric stood in front of them, his arms folded across his chest, bouncing on his heels like a five-year-old who just couldn’t want to tell his sister he’d hidden a frog in her bed. Carly saw Rocco in the courtyard, peeking in the window, but she didn’t give him the sign to come in. It was a public place, what could Ric do?

“Ric, why don’t you just…” Carly shrugged. “I don’t care what you do, as long as you don’t do it in my face—”

“Don’t worry,” Ric snarled. “I’m out of here, but I thought you ladies might like to be the first to know the reason why.”

“I cannot imagine why I’d be interested,” Courtney retorted. “Where’s Rocco?” She twisted in her seat towards the door.

“You should be asking…where’s Jason?” At the hiss in Ric’s voice, Carly felt the skin on her arms begin to rise, a chill down her spine. “Or even better, who’s he with?”

Courtney hesitated and glanced at Carly. Should she give in? Carly rolled her eyes. “All right, Ricky, we’ll play it your way.” She smirked. “Where’s Jason? Who’s he with?”

“Oh, the mother of his child,” Ric declared, his voice loud, and carrying. Even those who’d been trying to pretend not to be listening to the spectacle abandoned the pretense. Carly felt all eyes on them, and watched the blood drain from Courtney’s face. “That’s right,” Ric continued, enjoying himself. “I found out Elizabeth was pregnant, went to go see her, to figure out what to do next, and guess who came across us?”

“This isn’t…” Courtney’s voice faltered and she looked at Carly, fear and revulsion in her expression. She licked her lips. “This isn’t true.”

“Yeah, I wouldn’t have thought so if I hadn’t been there to hear it. Oh, you would have loved it, Carly. All the drama you so enjoy. Jason couldn’t wait to have me out of the picture. Elizabeth didn’t even have the decency to tell me herself—I had to hear it from him.”

Carly opened her mouth and closed it again. This didn’t…this didn’t make sense. She didn’t understand what was happening. Why would…why would Ric tell them—the whole world—something so easily disproved?

“Jason wouldn’t do that to me,” Courtney said, finding her voice finally. “He—”

“Oh, save it, sister. You know better.” Ric shrugged. “So I’ll just go upstairs and pack. I’m sure you have somewhere else to be.” He sent them one last malicious smile before disappearing into the back.

Carly looked at her sister-in-law, and then around the diner. “We should…” She cleared her throat. “We should go.” She felt disengaged from the moment, like an out of body situation, as if she was floating overhead and watching Ric spew these lies. Surely that would explain why she couldn’t scream back a denial, go after this piece of scum for lying about her best friend, for putting Courtney through it.

But somehow, she just couldn’t find a source of denial. She had no doubt Jason had claimed to be the father of Elizabeth’s child. The only question for Carly…

Was it true?

Jason’s Penthouse: Living Room

Something inside Jason knew, the moment Elizabeth walked out of the penthouse, that she was right. That this was a disaster that was completely out of their hands now, and maybe he’d been hasty, claiming paternity.

But watching Ric tower over her, the tension in Elizabeth’s posture, the fear in her eyes—he just wanted Ric out of her life and he was under orders from Sonny not do anything against him for the sake of their mother.

The words had just tumbled from his lips without thinking, and Jason wasn’t sure he’d take them back. If it got Ric out of Port Charles and away from the people he loved…it would be worth it.

When Courtney shoved his door open, her face ravaged by tears and anger, he knew…he knew he was about to pay the price he had told Elizabeth he was prepared to.

He set his pool cue on the table and started towards her. “What happened—”

“What happened?” Courtney cried. “That’s what you say to me?”

Behind her, Carly entered, and he was surprised to see that while Courtney was acting the way he thought she might…Carly looked subdued, sad even. She quietly set her bag on his desk, and turned to him, bracing a hand on her back. “Jase…Ric came by our table at Kelly’s.”

Jason closed his eyes, and he supposed Courtney took that action as an admission of guilt. He felt her purse slap against his chest and opened his eyes to see Carly holding Courtney’s arm, to keep the blonde from rushing across the room.

“Courtney,” Carly said. “Why don’t you let him explain—”

“Explain?” Courtney cried, her voice rising to almost a shrill shriek. “What is there to explain?” She yanked her arm away from Carly and stalked towards him. “I told you,” she growled, “I told you that if you loved Elizabeth, then you should go be with her. Didn’t I?”

His chest felt tight, but he realized it was sorrow at hurting her, not necessarily for what was coming next. What should have come months ago.

The end of something that never should have started.

“I’m sorry,” he said quietly. Because he was. Elizabeth had been right about Ric intent on causing damage—and he felt stupid, because he should have found a way to mitigate the fallout. “I didn’t mean to hurt—”

“Go to hell.” Courtney pressed her hands flat against his chest and pushed. “I told you I didn’t want to be your goddamned rebound, and you made me it anyway. If you wanted her all along, you son of a bitch, then why did you ever come to me?” Her chest heaving, her voice thick with tears. “Why did you leave her all alone here and come to me, and make me think I mattered?”

“I…” Jason’s voice faltered. Because that’s not the way it had happened. He frowned. Was it?

“As if it’s not abundantly clear,” Courtney snarled. “We are done. I hope you, your whore and your bastard are happy—”

“Don’t…” Jason bit off the automatic defense, but Courtney’s eyes bulged, because everyone in the room knew what he’d been about to say and Carly rolled her eyes. “Maybe you should…”

“And you have the nerve to tell me to leave when I’m breaking up with you.” Courtney’s laugh was rusty and bitter. “I don’t know what the hell I saw in you in the first place. You always want what you can’t have. I hope Elizabeth’s happy knowing she’s with a man who can’t ever be satisfied with what he has.” She raised her fist, as if to shove him again, but lowered it to her side. “I hope you both rot in hell.”

She stalked past Carly and slammed the door. Jason sighed, and sat on the arm of the sofa, waiting for Carly to unleash her own fury.

Instead, he heard her footsteps come closer and her fingers on his shoulder. He opened his eyes confused. “Carly…”

“I’m disappointed that you hurt Courtney like this,” Carly said after a moment. “That you didn’t have the decency to warn her, and let Ric stomp around with…this.” She pursed her lips. “After you told Ric the baby was yours, you should have made a beeline for the people in your life that would take this badly, especially Courtney.” She paused. “But maybe you thought Ric would just leave town, and it wouldn’t need to go further than that.”

“Carly,” Jason said slowly, because he could not have Carly a part of this lie. Carly was Courtney’s friend, and she might promise to keep the secret, but she also might eventually tell Courtney to spare her feelings. “I did not lie to Ric.”

“No, I know.” Carly patted his shoulder again. “It’s good…” She paused, as if trying to find the words. “It’s good that he’s not going to think he’s a father. You know…he’s obsessive about family, and if he thought Elizabeth was trying to keep him from his child, there’s no telling what he might to do to her.” She swallowed hard. “So you know, it’s good he doesn’t think he’s going to be a father.”

Jason stared at her, but Carly just stared back, almost blandly as if she didn’t mean anything except exactly what she said. “That’s right,” he agreed. “Ric is dangerous, and I’m glad he’s going to be out of Elizabeth’s life. Out of all our lives.”

“I am, too.” She paused. “You should tell Sonny if Courtney doesn’t get to him first. He’ll be happy to know he has a niece or nephew on the way.” At Jason’s sharp look, she continued, “Because you’re a part of our family, so any child of yours is part of ours.” She hesitated. “But maybe you should warn Elizabeth that Ric announced her happy news in a crowded diner, with Courtney in tow.”

Jason closed his eyes, and felt dread in the pit of his stomach. Elizabeth hadn’t had much choice in this debacle—she’d been forced to follow his lead in front of Ric, because what choice had he left her? And now, people would look at her and think… He nodded. “I will.”

I’m broken in two
And I know you’re on to me
That I only come home
When I’m so all alone
But I do believe
– I Shall Believe, Sheryl Crow

Tuesday, April 15, 2003

Elizabeth Webber’s Studio

The light knock on her door jerked Elizabeth out of a fitful nap. She scrubbed her eyes and tossed the light blanket to the bottom of her sofa. She blinked at the door, wondering if she’d heard anything at all. When it didn’t come again, she glanced at the digital clock on her table across the room. Six o’clock.

It felt like days since she’d left Emily at Kelly’s, heading for the docks to sit and stare out over the water. Instead, Ric had cornered her, Jason had claimed to be her child’s father and somehow, managed to make Elizabeth feel like they were making a reasonable decision.

Her stomach rolled, reminding her that she hadn’t eaten since breakfast and apparently, her unborn child wanted food.

Her unborn child. Oh, good God. These last few days had been such a nightmare that she’d barely come to terms with the idea of being someone’s mother, and now she had to deal with being Jason Morgan’s pretend baby mama.

“I want to set myself on fire,” she muttered, swinging her feet to the ground to slide them into her flats.

The knock came again and she frowned. “Who is it?” she called, hoping her voice would carry through the steel door so she wouldn’t have to stand just yet. She was so tired.

“Jason.”

She stifled a groan. Months of no contact and now she couldn’t get rid of him. The irony would be delicious, except this was her life. She thought about telling him to come in, but the door was locked and she didn’t think he would have kept the key.

Elizabeth stood and crossed the short distance to her door. She opened it to find Jason standing there, and Francis next to him. Right, Francis was her new companion until Ric was no longer a danger. “Um. Hey.” She rubbed the back of her neck. “I didn’t…what’s going on?”

“Let’s go inside.” Jason pushed her slightly inside and looked at Francis. “No interruptions.” He closed the door and took a deep breath.

“Oh, God. What’s happened?” Elizabeth asked. “Have you changed your mind? Because if you have, that’s okay, because this is insane, Jason. I tried to tell you—”

“Ric saw Courtney and Carly in Kelly’s.”

Elizabeth snapped her mouth shut, and her hunger pangs shifted into straight out nausea. “Oh. Oh. Oh. God.” She pressed a hand to her mouth. “He announced it to the whole room, didn’t he? Oh, my God.”

“Yeah.” Jason rubbed his forehead. “I’m sorry, Elizabeth. You told me he’d do something like that and I just…” He exhaled shortly. “I don’t know what I could have changed, but I could have done something.”

Elizabeth turned away from him and stumbled back to her sofa, collapsing. “This is the day that never ends. Any minute now, Emily is going to be coming to that door, followed my grandmother and they’re going to be asking how I could dump a Harvard lawyer for you and of course, I can’t tell them I wanted to throw myself in the harbor when I found out exactly what Ric Lansing is, and they’re just…” She squeezed her eyes shut. “Oh, God, and you had to deal with Carly and Courtney.” She sprang to her feet and looked at him, her heart aching. “And you didn’t change your mind, so they think…”

“Yeah.” Jason just stared at the ground. “I guess the good news is that Ric believed us.”

Elizabeth laughed, almost hysterically, until the tears she’d thought she exhausted fell again. “Oh, yeah, that would be the good news.” She covered her face with her hands. “Oh, God, Jason. Did you talk to Sonny? Is he angry?”

“Not yet.” Jason sat next to her on the couch. “Courtney left, and Carly suggested I come tell you what Ric did. So you’re not blindsided by someone showing up here.”

Elizabeth lowered her hands and just blinked at him. “What do you mean Carly suggested? She didn’t want to throw me out a window?”

“I’m not sure…” Jason hesitated. “I don’t know if Carly believed it. I told her it was the truth, but she just looked at me like…” He shook his head. “I don’t know. But if she does suspect I was lying, she doesn’t know for sure, and she’s not going to betray me on a suspicion and possibly put my child at risk.”

“This has gotten out of hand so fast, Jason.” Her hands were shaking as she lowered them to her lap. “I just found out on Friday that I’m pregnant and I had barely decided to keep the baby before finding out Ric was sleeping with Faith and then he threatened me…” Her voice faltered. “Because that’s what he meant when he said he wouldn’t be separated from his child. I was so stupid, Jason. How could I believe him? How could I ignore all the signs?”

Her shoulders shaking, she struggled to take deep breaths and get herself under control. Jason didn’t need her falling apart. He was the one whose girlfriend had obviously broken up with him over his lie.

Before she could regain her composure, she felt Jason’s arm hesitantly around her shoulders, tucking her into his side. She wanted to lean on him, she wanted to use his strength to bolster her own, but how could she justify it?

“I’m so sorry, Jason,” she murmured, swiping at her eyes. “This is all my fault—”

“You had a right to care for someone,” he replied quietly. “And to believe him when he told you he cared. I—I understand why you didn’t take me or Sonny seriously. We had no proof. We just…we had a feeling about him, but I didn’t know if I disliked him because I didn’t trust him or if…” He hesitated and she looked up at him. “I don’t think I would have liked anyone you dated.”

Elizabeth sighed and straightened, sliding away from him on the sofa a little. She was not going to go down this road with him. “I should have known better,” she said. “I should have known if you or Sonny were going to bother warning me, it wouldn’t be without a good reason. I just kept…” She bit her lip. “I just kept seeing Taggart calling you names right in front of me, like you couldn’t hear him. He was so good to me, Jason, after I reported…my rape, and when we thought Lucky was dead. He was only trying to protect me when he said those things.” She pushed her hair behind her shoulders. “I thought it was like that, but I should have been smarter—”

“Elizabeth,” Jason cut in, “is it going to change anything to keep going back over what you could have done differently? Or are you just going to make yourself sick thinking about it?” He reached for her hand. “Ric is slime, but even Carly trusted him for a long time. We hired him as a lawyer for a little while. How can you blame yourself for trusting him like we did? Elizabeth, you can’t keep going back to that. You have to think about what happens next.”

She closed her eyes. “You’re right. I know you’re right.” She looked back at him. “What does happen next?”

“Well…” Jason said. He looked hesitant, as if he hadn’t been expecting that question. “Are you feeling okay? Do—do you have everything you need?”

“For now,” Elizabeth said. She glanced around her small studio. “I’m going to work overtime while I can and put some money away so I can afford a better apartment. Maybe one with a kitchen or an actual bathroom.” She sighed. “Jason, you should go see Sonny. I’m sure Courtney or Carly have already talked to him, and you don’t want to make things more difficult with him than they have to be.”

“All right.” Jason stood and tugged on his ear. “Listen. Francis is on duty for another hour, then Cody is going to be on the door until about six tomorrow morning. I want you to have someone twenty-four hours a day, so they’re going to be in eight hour shifts. I’m not sure who the third guard is going to be. I don’t…” He hesitated. “Do you remember who you had last September? While you were…at the penthouse?”

Elizabeth tucked her legs underneath her and nodded. “Yeah. I didn’t go out much, so I shared Max with Carly on the door, and then I went out, depending on what time it was I had Cody or Marco.” She smiled hesitantly. “They were really nice, so I’m glad Cody will be familiar.” She tilted her head. “And Francis was really patient with me the first time I had a guard. I forgot a few times he was supposed to be with me, but he never got angry.”

“Good.” Jason looked a bit bewildered, as if he’d forgotten how much experience she had now with being guarded. “I think I can put Marco on you then. I want…you to be comfortable with them, but I know it can be restrictive—”

“Not really.” Elizabeth shrugged. “They’re there to keep me safe, so I can’t really complain. I worry for them because I don’t want anyone to get hurt because of me, but…” She sighed. “It’s better than the alternative, so there’s no use in complaining.”

“I’m going to go talk to Sonny, now, but I want you to call me if you need anything.” He paused. “We have to talk about money eventually.”

“Jason—”

“I have it and if people are going to believe this…is my child,” Jason said, trying not to look pained, “then you have to let me…you have to let me help. Maybe just medical expenses if you’re uncomfortable with anything more.”

Conscious that Jason was making so many sacrifices to keep her safe, she just didn’t have the heart or energy to argue with him. “All right. When you’re right, you’re right.”

He eyed her, almost in disbelief. “All right.” He stepped back to the sofa and crouched in front of her, taking her hand in one of his. “I know that this seems like too much all at once, and I don’t really know what we’re going to do next. But we’re going to get through this, and I’m going to make sure you and your child are safe.”

She saw the resolution and determination in his eyes and sighed. “I believe that, Jason, and I know this is difficult for everyone involved, so thank you for everything you’re doing. I just hope…you don’t hate me one day for this.”

“That,” Jason said, looking at her like he used to before she set fire to everything they had shared, “will never happen.”

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

Sonny Corinthos, to the shock of no one, was not always a good friend. Most of the time he was barely decent. He knew that he had overreacted when he’d discovered Jason’s relationship with Courtney, but he was entitled to some reservations when the little sister he barely knew was dating his best friend. Sonny didn’t think Courtney was cut out for Jason’s life long-term—women always thought they could handle it, but most couldn’t. Carly liked the lifestyle too much to quibble about the drawbacks. Not his sister. Courtney always wanted to help, always wanted to know what was going on.

It made Sonny miss the hell out of Elizabeth Webber, who had hidden Jason in her studio all those years ago with no questions asked. She’d kept him fed and safe and left the room when asked. And had Sonny had remembered that last fall and agreed to let Elizabeth know he wasn’t really dead when Jason had requested it, well…then things might have been different.

So Sonny knew when Elizabeth had walked out, it wasn’t about the life, it was about Jason. He’d figured they’d get over it eventually—they always did. Until Courtney and Ric complicated things.

Standing in Jason’s living room, watching as Jason, with a pained expression, attempted to explain that Elizabeth Webber was now pregnant and that it was Jason’s baby, he knew it was a lie. Courtney had rushed to Sonny earlier that day, angry and hurt, babbling this nonsense, so he’d come to find out what was going on.

Jason looked uncomfortable. He looked irritated. He did not look like a man who had accidentally impregnated a woman he’d been in love with for years.

Sonny exhaled slowly and put his hands at his waist, waiting for Jason to awkwardly finish apologizing for hurting Courtney, but that he was going to stand by Elizabeth. “You done?” he asked.

Jason winced and Sonny knew what he was expecting. Anger. Promises of retribution. The usual Sonny Corinthos MO and maybe…if Sonny believed that it had actually happened the way Jason had described, there might have been some.

But clearly, Elizabeth was pregnant by his psychotic half-brother. Which meant she was family.

“Sonny, I—” Jason started, as if to begin the nonsense all over again.

Sonny held up a hand. “Let’s recap. You and Elizabeth break up last fall. We both know it’s partially my fault—”

“Sonny—”

“You start dating my sister and Elizabeth starts dating Ric.” At Jason’s scowl, Sonny nodded. “Yeah, but she doesn’t listen to our warnings, because you know, she likes to make up her own mind. How many people told her you were a dangerous, brain-damaged thug?” Sonny chuckled fondly. “I liked seeing her go after Taggart. He never knew how to deal with it.”

“Sonny—”

“And somehow, in all that mess, you sleep with Elizabeth and now she’s pregnant.”

Jason pinched the bridge of his nose. “I never meant to hurt Courtney—”

“Didn’t think you did.” Jason narrowed his eyes and Sonny made an attempt to inject some annoyance into his relaxed tone, but he just couldn’t muster the anger Jason wanted to see. “So, how’d this happen?”

“I—” Jason blinked and actually stepped back. “Are you—” He blinked again. “Are you asking for details?”

“Absolutely,” Sonny nodded. He raised an eyebrow. “Did she throw herself at you? Were you drunk? Was it more than once—”

“I’m not…” At a loss clearly, Jason shook his head. “I’m not going to discuss that with you.”

“Ah, ah,” Sonny wagged his finger, enjoying the crap out of this. He so rarely caught Jason off guard, he was going to milk this for all it was worth. “You have to think of these details, Jason. You have to not look so shocked when someone asks about this fictitious affair.”

“I think I need to sit down,” Jason muttered. He sat on the sofa and put his head in his hands. “Sonny, I’m serious. I…” He cleared his throat. “Elizabeth and I…” He closed his eyes. “God.”

Sonny shrugged and lowered himself into the armchair adjacent to the sofa. “I would be relieved that you find it so difficult to lie to me if this situation weren’t so serious.” He leaned forward. “Jason, we don’t have to say the words because we both know these things only work when very few people know the truth, but if Elizabeth needs a certain kind of protection, I’m going to give it to her. You don’t have to lie to me or anyone else. Her baby is my family.”

“We have to,” Jason said quietly. “Because if…certain people know the truth, she’ll be in even more danger.” He looked at Sonny. “People have to think this is my child, because it’s the only way she’ll be safe. From…” He hesitated. “From people.”

“Okay, so the world has to think that, and I think…” Sonny hesitated. “I know that Robin told the truth about Michael, so you think you can’t trust anyone else other than Elizabeth. I get that. But you know I’ll protect Elizabeth with my life. Even if I didn’t feel like an ass because I refused to tell her about my death, but to be honest…” Sonny paused and leaned even closer. “If you had told me she was not just the woman you wanted to be with, but someone you were actually with, we could have discussed it. You never told me things had changed.”

“Would it have mattered?” Jason asked quietly. “Should it have mattered? This was Elizabeth, who’d never let either of us down when it mattered and you knew it.” He shook his head. “We’re not…Sonny, for all the times she’s protected me and kept me alive, going back to that December, I owe it to her to keep her and her child safe.”

“I certainly owe her for keeping you alive,” Sonny agreed. “But that’s not why you’re doing it.” When Jason looked at him, his mouth set in a mutinous line, he held up a hand. “We won’t talk about motives. I think you and I understand each other, but you’re right. Carly and Courtney, God love them, are liabilities. And it’s not like people don’t know your history with Elizabeth. Even the Families will swallow this after Elizabeth was kidnapped last summer, so we can pull this off.”

“I wanted Ric to leave town,” Jason admitted, “I thought if he didn’t feel like had anything to stay for, particularly a child, he’d run before the Families caught up to him. Elizabeth never asked me to do this. I volunteered.”

Well, naturally, but Sonny wasn’t going to antagonize the already irritated younger man with that smart remark. “And maybe it would have enough to send him out of town had it been anyone other than you, but Ric hates you. He may come after Elizabeth even if he believed you, because now he’ll think he has leverage.”

“I should have thought about that.” Jason shoved himself to his feet. “He was…he had her cornered on the docks, and I could tell she was scared.” He closed his eyes and shook his head. “I could hear him badgering her about the baby, and she tried to deny she was even pregnant, but he tricked her, told her he had her records from the hospital, and she gave it away. So she tried to tell him it wasn’t his but she wouldn’t tell him who.”

“And you jumped in.” Sonny nodded. “I get it, Jason. Heat of the moment. She’s in danger either way, but claiming the kid as yours works for us. I can call in other protection. The Families want Ric’s head on a platter, especially Tagliatti. We tell them the situation and hopefully, they’ll go after him full-throated.” He nodded and rubbed his jaw. “Maybe we downplay the odds Ric is the father. You and Elizabeth were dating, some problems occurred, you both rebounded with others, but worked things out—”

“Sonny, that’s—” Jason shook his head. “It’s not going to work.”

“You leave the particulars to me.” Sonny stepped towards him. “You made the decision to claim the baby, Jason. To break my sister’s heart, which I find doesn’t bother me as much as it should since I never thought she was right for you, anyway. And if you had come to me with this before you did it, I would have said the same thing. Your first instinct was to protect Elizabeth. Let me help.” He pressed a hand to his chest. “I know it’s going to be rough on you both, but let me make up for the problems I caused last year. Let me protect Elizabeth and my niece or nephew the way my family should be protected.” When Jason finally nodded, Sonny continued, “I’ll set up a meeting with Families.”

He started for the door but Jason held up a hand. “How did you know I was lying?” he asked.

Sonny turned back and looked at his best friend, sorrow in his chest. “Because if it were true, you’d be upset that you’d hurt Courtney, a little worried about my reaction, but, Jason, if Elizabeth Webber was pregnant with your child, you’d look a lot less miserable and pained. You wouldn’t have to choke out the words.” He hesitated. “You’re going to have to sell this, you know. Can you pretend that Ric Lansing’s child is yours?”

Uncomfortable, Jason looked away. “I figure it won’t take long to deal with Ric,” he muttered. “He’s impatient. He’ll strike and we’ll get him. He’s isolated and desperate.”

“Ah.” Sonny dipped his chin into his chest. “You’re banking on this being a short-term solution. Well, that’s moronic.” When Jason glared at him, he just shrugged. “Ric could go under for months. He could wait until the kid is born to try to snatch it. Until Ric is dealt with, the world is going to think Elizabeth is carrying your child, despite both of you having been dating other people. You think it’s going to be a walk in the park for her to deal with this?”

“No.” Jason cleared his throat. “I know that the Quartermaines are going to have a field day with this, but still—”

“And if Ric goes underground for years, if we don’t find him, what…” Sonny arched his eyebrows. “You gonna pull the protection and claim after a while? You gonna say, well, it’s been an entire year. Doesn’t matter that the world thinks this kid is mine, it’s not and I’m not gonna pretend anymore?”

Swallowing hard, Jason looked down. “Yeah, I know this is complicated, and I don’t have all the answers today, Sonny. I just know…I just know I can’t let anything happen to her.”

“Well, start working on those answers.” Sonny pointed at him. “Because no matter what happens with Ric, there are going to be people who keep believing this. Elizabeth may end up raising a child that is yours legally as well as in the eyes of everyone we know. So I’d think about the consequences of that.”

Wednesday, April 16, 2003

Kelly’s: Courtyard

Elizabeth put a few dishes into her bin and glanced over at the entrance of the courtyard where Francis was standing. “You sure you don’t want coffee?” she asked.

“No, thank you, Miss Webber,” he answered as he had the other three times she’d asked in the six hours she’d been working so far. She knew the guards were a necessary evil, but she felt so guilty having these men follow her around, as if her life was worth more than theirs.

Her first day at work since the tumultuous events of the day before had gone relatively well. Her grandmother had called her that morning, and had merely said they would talk about this in person. Elizabeth knew what that tone had meant, but she was relieved not to have to deal with it right at that moment. A reprieve was welcome. There had been looks and some whispers, and Bobbie had gently asked how she was doing, but no one had said anything awful to her face.

But as Emily stalked into the courtyard, Elizabeth should have known the other shoe would drop. She perched the plastic bin full of dishes on her hip, and squared her shoulders. She had not called her friend, understanding that it would not be a pleasant conversation and she really just wanted a break from that.

Emily stopped in front of her and arched an eyebrow. “I received a phone call yesterday,” she said. “Courtney was crying.”

Elizabeth bit her lip and sighed. “Em, I would have called, but I just—”

“Save it.” Emily shook her head. “I cannot believe this, Elizabeth. You’re supposed to be my friend and you let me think Ric was the father. You should have told me.” She stepped towards her. “You know, I thought you’d grown up. I thought you were better than the annoying, manipulative shrew that tortured Sarah when you first moved to town, but maybe that was just an act to keep Lucky around.”

Elizabeth blinked. She slowly set the bin down, and for the first time since nightmare had begun, it wasn’t nausea that rolled in her stomach or sorrow, but anger. “Excuse me?” she asked coolly. “You think I should have told you that I was pregnant with Jason’s baby?” She fisted her hand on her hip, and slightly cocked it out a bit, channeling Lizzie Webber. “When would I have done that exactly? After you called me selfish for missing Lucky and Nikolas yesterday? Maybe I should have told you last week when you were telling me that Jason wasn’t all that interested in me anyway. Maybe it should have been when you were calling me everything short of delusional about my feelings.” She stepped closer, feeling the anger spread in her veins. “So tell, Emily, when the hell do you think I should have told you something so difficult?”

Emily glared at her. “Oh, you’re going to play the victim. Well, that’s no surprise. You’ve always been a martyr. Oh, woes me, I’m the only one who lost Lucky. Woes me, I’m so confused because I’m a tramp who can’t stop playing two men off each other. Woes me, Lucky doesn’t love me anymore.” She pointed her finger at Elizabeth. “I watched you chase Jason out of town two years ago, and I know you screwed around on him last summer with Zander. I thought we could still be friends, but it’s clear that you’re the same bitch that rolled into town to make everyone’s lives miserable.”

Elizabeth took a step back and just stared at the stranger in front of her. “Are…are you serious right now, Emily?” she asked. “You’re angry with me about Zander, even though you broke up with him. I told you I was sorry, that it was a mistake, and believe me, I paid for that a hundred times over every time Jason looked right through me like I didn’t exist.”

“Sorry doesn’t change what you did,” Emily hissed. “Sorry doesn’t change that you’re not some little angel. You screwed around on my brother last summer, and then you screwed around on Ric. You wanted Jason when you had Lucky. You’re just never satisfied with what’s in front of you.”

“I don’t even…” Elizabeth shook her head. “I don’t even know you right now. I think we’re…I think we’re done talking.”

“We’re done when I say we’re done,” Emily snarled. “I’m going to tell my brother he should demand a paternity test, because God knows who else you slept with.” She tossed a glance at the guard at the courtyard entrance and smirked. “But maybe you just want my brother’s money. I see he’s already got a guard on you.” She folded her arms under her breasts. “Sure didn’t take you long. And here, I was worried about you since Courtney told me Ric was awful—”

“Yeah, let’s talk about that, Emily, you being the one that told Ric I was pregnant.” And here was the root of all her anger. This…person standing in front of her, as if they were actually friends, had put this entire disaster into motion. “What the hell gave you the right to tell him anything?”

“He deserved to know the truth,” Emily retorted. “Because you never bothered to tell me who the hell knocked you up. How was I supposed to know it wasn’t his?”

“You were supposed to keep your mouth shut!” Elizabeth cried. “You were supposed to be my friend. I trusted you. I didn’t tell anyone else I was pregnant, so as soon as Ric came and found me and demanded to know why I hadn’t told him, I knew you said something and I just…I died inside Emily, because I was terrified of him finding out.” She clenched her fists at her sides. “Do you know why I was breaking up with him? Because he only dated me to annoy Jason. He laughed at the idea of caring about me. I was just leverage to him, but I couldn’t tell you those things because I just knew that you wouldn’t believe me. You’d think I was overreacting or that I was using it as an excuse to go back to Jason.”

Emily narrowed her eyes. “If you’re so sure this baby is Jason’s, why were you terrified of Ric finding out?” She gasped. “You’re lying to my brother, aren’t you? I cannot believe—”

“I was terrified that Ric would find out I was pregnant and assume the baby was his,” Elizabeth lied. “I was terrified that he wouldn’t believe that he wasn’t, and that he would use my child as another reason to go after Jason. But you don’t think about things like that, do you? You’re such a self-righteous little bitch. You think you know what’s best for Jason, what’s best for me? You’ve spent the last month trying to convince me that your brother never gave a damn about me, and I almost believed you.”

“He didn’t,” Emily argued. “If he had, he would have come after you. He wouldn’t have spent all that time with Courtney. Because when my brother wants something, he goes after it—”

“You weren’t even here!” Elizabeth stamped her foot in frustration. “You have no idea what was going through our minds.”

“And what since you’re knocked up, it’s all good again?” Emily bit out. “You’re going to move in together and live happily ever after?”

“Not that it’s any of your business,” Elizabeth snarled, “but no. I’m not the slut you seem to think I am.” Her ire faded, and she suddenly blinked back tears. “You know…better than most, what I went through after my rape. How difficult it was for me to develop a physical relationship with someone again, even Lucky. I made mistakes last summer, Emily, and I am truly sorry that it hurt you. Believe me, I know the damage I caused, but for you to stand there, and insinuate that I sleep around when you damn well should know me better than that…” Her throat burned. “Well, then I guess I don’t know you after all.”

Emily pressed her lips together. “I guess the feeling is mutual.” She spun her heel and left the courtyard.

Elizabeth pressed her hands to her burning cheeks and turned to find Francis still at his post, his face as impassive as ever. “You guys…you don’t report to Jason everything do you?” she asked softly.

He cleared his throat, and looked at her, uncomfortable. “No, Miss Webber. Our only instructions are to keep you safe. The only thing I tell Mr. Morgan is that you got to work without incident or home that way.”

“Good.” Elizabeth turned back and sighed, resigned, as Carly walked towards her, her own guard behind her. “And the hits just keep coming.” She sank into a chair, and looked at Jason and Courtney’s best friend with apprehension. “Carly.”

“Elizabeth.” Carly stopped in front of her. “So you know I know.”

“I do,” Elizabeth nodded. “Can I ask you to yell at me tomorrow? Because I’m just…I’m not sure I can handle it right now.”

“Hmm…” Carly tapped her fingers on the purse at her side. “No, I don’t think I’m going to yell at you at all.”

Elizabeth’s head snapped up and she narrowed her eyes, remembering Jason’s worries from the day before. “Why?”

Carly shrugged. “I don’t like being predictable. Takes the spice out of life.” She cleared her throat. “I don’t like that Courtney’s hurting,” she admitted. “But this is…Jason’s life. His decisions, his choices. I’ve spent a lot of our friendship not respecting those things. And judging by the shouting I heard as I walked up, you don’t have a lot of people who aren’t going to yell at you about this.”

“My head hurts,” Elizabeth said, blankly.

“Like I said. I hate predictability. I’m going to have lunch. If you’re still on the clock, maybe you want to come serve me.” She pushed the door open, and disappeared in side, her guard Rocco taking up position with Francis at the entrance.

“I’m living in the twilight zone,” she murmured before she stood and got back to work.

And I claw for solid ground
I’m pulled down by the undertow
I never thought I could feel so low
Oh darkness I feel like letting go
If all of the strength and all of the courage
Come and lift me from this place
I know I could love you much better than this
– Full of Grace, Sarah McLachlan

Monday, May 19, 2003

 General Hospital: Kelly Lee’s Office

After a month of pretending to be carrying Jason Morgan’s child, Elizabeth wished that she could have some of the benefits that title ought to bring. Like having Jason at a doctor’s appointments. She’d had one shortly after starting this debacle, but she’d gone alone and had had to struggle to fill out forms with the father’s medical history.

She’d had to deal with Monica and Alan cornering her outside the appointment, and asking questions about her child, wondering if Jason would allow them to be part of his child’s life. She’d had to deal with Emily’s angry stares as the medical student passed her during her rounds.

She’d had to deal with the whispers of people wondering if she’d tricked Jason Morgan into believing this was his child because he had more money than Ric Lansing, who had slunk out of town and disappeared. He was off the radar, and tension was building in Elizabeth’s world, because this was exactly what she was afraid of. Ric was gone, and the world believed she was having Jason’s baby. This ridiculous plan had no exit strategy.

And here she was again. For her first ultrasound, now that she had money to pay for such things. She was nervous about seeing her child on the screen for the first time, hoping that she could actually understand what she was looking at, and praying she would feel connected to this child that had changed her life, and caused her jeans feel slightly more snug than they had just two weeks ago.

She was doing this alone, and knew the world would pity her. Jason may have claimed her baby, and people might believe it, but other than checking in with her guards and having someone set up an account so that she could pay her hospital bills, she had barely seen the alleged father. He told her he was chasing down leads on Ric, but Elizabeth thought he might be regretting even getting involved.

“It’s you and me, kid, against the world,” she murmured, her hand on her abdomen. “I won’t promise to be an amazing mother, but I’ll do my best.”

The door popped open and a perky blonde entered, wearing some sort of stuffed animals fastened at her wrist. “Hello! I’m Nadine Crowell.” She thrust her hand out. “Kelly’s running late, and she asked me to get you set up.”

“Okay.” Elizabeth leaned back on the table and sighed. “Are you new? You weren’t here last time.”

“I just started two weeks ago. I moved here from Manhattan.” Nadine smiled and reached for the blood pressure cup. “I was glancing at your chart before I came in. Your first baby, you must be so excited!”

Elizabeth looked at this friendly woman, with her bright smiles and enthusiastic eyes and she felt tears burning in her eyes. “I guess you haven’t lived here long enough yet to know the answer to that.”

Nadine frowned and fitted the cup on her arm. “Oh, you mean the hospital gossip about you being knocked up by the local alleged mob enforcer while you were dating other people.” When Elizabeth just blinked at her, Nadine shrugged. “I don’t see what that has to do with being excited. Sure it’s a crazy situation, but does that mean you can’t be happy about your baby? My Aunt Rayleen always said that a baby is sunshine and moonbeams and bits of stardust blown by the hand of God.” When Elizabeth said nothing, Nadine bit her lip, looking embarrassed. “I’m probably overstepping—”

“No, no.” Elizabeth exhaled slowly and winced as the pressure began to build on her arm. “You’re absolutely right, Nadine. Just because I managed to get myself into a massive disaster, I get to feel how I want about becoming a mother.”

“Oh, good. You’re not mad.” Nadine smiled, but it dimmed when she read the print out. “Hmm…140/90.” She frowned, letting the cup deflate.

“Is that bad?” Elizabeth asked. “Is too high?”

“It’s not good.” Nadine made a note in the chart. “But I guess you’ve been more stressed since your last visit. It was slightly elevated then, but it’s even higher now.” She bit her lip. “We’ll let Kelly know.”

After Nadine took Elizabeth’s blood, and reluctantly convinced her to step on a scale, Kelly Lee bustled in. She was a pretty Asian woman who had immediately put Elizabeth at ease the month before with her brisk and friendly manner. These were the only two women in the world who didn’t look at Elizabeth like she was gum on their shoe.

She wanted to hug them.

“Good morning, Elizabeth.” Kelly sat on the stool next the ultrasound machine and took the chart from Nadine. “How are you feeling? You’re not as nauseous as you were last month, I hope?”

“No.” Elizabeth sat up a little. “I’m tired still, but not as much as I was a few weeks ago. I’m only throwing up like twice a week and not twice an hour.”

“Good, good.” Kelly clucked her tongue. “Your blood pressure is still up. I need you to relax more, honey, before it becomes a serious issue. If I see these numbers again at your next appointment, I may have to suggest bed rest.”

Great. Bed rest. Just what she needed working to save money for a new apartment and for the essentials. “I’ll try, Dr. Lee, but you know…my situation hasn’t been ideal.”

“I know.” Kelly reached over and squeezed her hand. “But hopefully, all the people who want to yell and scream at you have finished and they’ll let you get back to your most important job for the next six and a half months—growing your beautiful baby.” She hesitated. “I see you turned in a more complete medical report from Mr. Morgan. That’s good. I don’t expect any complications, but it’s always good to have a full picture.”

It had been the most mortifying experience of her life taking those papers to Jason’s penthouse and being forced to leave them with Sonny because Jason hadn’t returned her phone calls, but it was a necessary fiction. Jason’s parents worked at this hospital and they were Quartermaines, so they were likely checking records.

Kelly glanced around. “And I see we’re on our own again.” Sympathy shone in her dark eyes for a moment before she turned to switch on the machines. “Well, maybe when we do the ultrasound and find out gender next month. That sometimes kicks fathers into gear.” She smiled at Nadine. “Sometimes it’s not real to them otherwise.”

“Maybe,” Elizabeth murmured. But she knew better. Jason might have promised her he wouldn’t resent her for putting him in this situation, but a lousy four weeks into this ruse and she felt as alone as she had in that penthouse last fall.

She was never going to learn.

“We’ll how about we look at this kid and see a heartbeat,” Kelly said. “You up for it, Elizabeth?”

“Absolutely.” Elizabeth wanted to feel connected to her child, to see it on screen and make it real in her head, because it was clear that they were going to be on their own.

Corinthos Penthouse: Master Bedroom

Carly hummed as she flipped through her brand-new maternity clothing. She rarely needed an excuse to go shopping, but pregnancy was proving to be a great excuse to keep Sonny from snarking at her when she made Rocco carry bags inside.

Sonny was downstairs even now, planning a nutritious dinner that made Carly’s stomach revolt. No sugar. No chocolate. Nothing sweet. Nothing fun.

“Hey, Carly.” Courtney entered and flopped down on the bed. “You’re going to have to turn the other guest room into a closet pretty soon.”

Carly smirked and hung another summer dress. “I’m saving that for the middle of the summer when I’m driving Sonny crazy.” She looked at sister-in-law. “How are you doing? You haven’t been over here for a while.”

“I called Sonny before I came,” Courtney replied, reaching for one of Carly’s bags. “To make sure Jason was out for the day and Elizabeth wasn’t around.” She grimaced. “I’m trying really hard to be okay with this, Carly, but it’s so hard. I have to work with her twice a week, sometimes three. Bobbie could only do so much with our schedules.”

“Must be tense.” Carly reached for an old dress to toss it on the giveaway pile. It was on the tip of her tongue to tell Courtney that she needn’t have worried about seeing Elizabeth. Carly hadn’t seen her at the penthouse once. In fact, she wasn’t aware that Jason had even seen the mother of his child all that often. “Have you two talked about what’s going on?”

“No.” Courtney sighed. “I mean, maybe we should but I can’t really think of what I’d say.” She pulled out a tank top from the bag and stacked it on the bed with some others. “I’ve been trying to figure out how it happened, and I guess I initially assumed it meant they still loved one another.”

Carly turned and looked at her. “Why?”

“Well…” Courtney hesitated and blinked at her. “Jason won’t tell me how it happened. I ran into him on the docks last week, and I didn’t mean to, but I started yelling at him. And then I begged him to tell me it was a mistake, that it was never going to happen again, but he refused. And you know, he almost defended her the day we found out.” She jerked a shoulder. “I thought that meant that Elizabeth was going to be in his life, but you know…I only see her with guards. He never drops her off at work or picks her up. I thought he was trying to avoid shoving my face in it, which I appreciated, but Penny told me he never shows up on her shifts either.” She bit her lip. “Carly, you know people are talking about Ric.”

“What about Ric?” Carly’s hands tightened on the sweater she was going to donate.

“Well…” Courtney paused. “That maybe Elizabeth doesn’t know who the father is and she told Jason it was his because she wanted it to be—”

“No.” Carly spun around, her heart racing. “No. I know that would make everything easier, and I am so sorry, Courtney. But it’s not true. Jason is the father.”

Courtney stared at her. “You sound…” She swallowed hard. “You sound really convinced.”

Carly cleared her throat. “Yeah…well… I had my suspicions, and I badgered Jason quite relentlessly until he told me that he had no doubts. He wouldn’t give me details, but I gathered from that and some…arguments I may have had with Elizabeth that she and Ric were only together once or twice and it was not in the right time frame.” She smoothed out the wrinkles in the sweater she had twisted in her hands. This rumor had be squelched. It simply had to be. “I’m sorry, Courtney, I really am.”

“Well, I guess it make sense.” Courtney sighed. “I mean, once Elizabeth thought she had a chance with Jason again, she probably wouldn’t have screwed it up by sleeping with Ric again.”

“Exactly.” Carly nodded and took the stack of tank tops from the bed and shoved them into a drawer. “If Jason had any doubts, that’d be different. But he’s convinced.”

“Okay,” Courtney drawled. She stood and folded her arms across her chest. “Then why doesn’t he at least act like he’s going to be a father?”

Carly frowned and looked at her. “What do you mean? She has guards on her. Jason’s paying for her medical bills. I think she’s being stubborn about anything else.”

“I guess.” Courtney pursed her lips. “Though if I were pregnant, I guess I might want the father of my child to pay some attention to me.” She sighed. “I think I just want to believe that he did this because he loved her and wanted to be with her. He hasn’t even asked me to forgive him, so it means that he’s sorry he hurt me, but he’s not interested in getting back together. Why not if he’s not going to be with her?” A tear slid down her cheek. “If he didn’t want me anymore, why didn’t he break up with me before he slept with her?”

“I’m sorry,” Carly said. “I just… I don’t know the answer to that.”

General Hospital: Cafeteria

Nadine sipped her iced tea and smiled across the table at Elizabeth. “Thanks for asking me to coffee.” She wrinkled her nose. “Though neither of us seem to be drinking that.”

Elizabeth laughed and stirred her hot chocolate. “I just had a craving for hot chocolate. I know it’s getting warm out, but I just…” She shrugged. “I love my chocolate.”

“I hear ya.” Nadine set her tea down. “I haven’t had a chance to meet a lot of people yet with my work schedule. I decided to move up here on a whim, really, a few months ago and had to wait for an opening.” She played with the wrapper of her straw.

“You may have noticed from my appointment,” Elizabeth began, “that I don’t have a strong support system right now.” She tucked her hair behind her ear. “I burned a lot of bridges getting pregnant with…” She hesitated, still finding it difficult to say. “With my ex-boyfriend’s baby, and most of the people I might have confided in are out of town or are angry with me. So I hope you don’t mind that I saw a friendly face and hoped to have someone talk to.”

“Oh, absolutely.” Nadine wiggled in her chair. “It totally sucks to be basically alone in the world. My dad took off ages ago, my mom died and my Aunt Rayleen raised me and my sister until Jolene—that’s my sister—killed a patient in a mercy killing and then injected herself with a drug that left her in a vegetative state. Then Aunt Rayleen died, and my ex-boyfriend turned out to be total jerk I wanted to throw out the window, so I decided I need to get the hell out of New York.” She finished this dialogue with a sip of iced tea.

Elizabeth blinked and couldn’t fight a smile. “It’s brave to pick up leave. To start a new life.” She twisted her fingers together. “I thought about it when I found out I was pregnant. I thought maybe everyone would be better off if I never told anyone and just headed out.” She pursed her lips. “But as you can see, that didn’t work out for me.”

“Well, maybe the father of your kid will get more involved after the next visit.” Nadine hesitated. “Is there a chance he might come to this one?”

“Unlikely,” Elizabeth admitted. She looked across the cafeteria where Monica and Alan were sipping coffee and studiously trying not to look at her. “I think he’s regretting his decision to get involved.”

“Oh.” Nadine frowned. “Well, that sucks large.” She squared her shoulders. “Well, then you know what? I’ll be your other person in the room. You should have someone with you when you find out the gender. Someone who will smile and be happy with you.”

Elizabeth looked down, her throat tight. “That would be…” She swallowed. “I would really like that, Nadine. Thank you.” She hesitated. “You know…until you asked me if I was excited about the baby, no one else had. It was just…everyone looking at this baby like she was a disaster that just needed to fixed or taken care of.” She swallowed again. “No one…no one’s asked me about being a mother, or if I was happy.”

Nadine reached across the table. “I’ve known you all of an hour, Elizabeth Webber, but I promise you, I will be your person. I think we’re both in need of a friend, and I’m taking applications if you are.”

Elizabeth squeezed it, and felt the tears sliding down her cheeks. “I’m not only taking them, I’m accepting them on the spot. And to celebrate our new friendship, I want you to be the first to know that although the circumstances are less than ideal, I am ridiculously excited about my child.” She took the sonogram photo out of her pocket and smiled down at it, feeling like a mother for the first time. “And I cannot wait to hold her for the first time.”

Nadine grinned. “You’re having your mommy senses tingle. You think she’ll be a girl?”

“I do.” Elizabeth’s breath hitched, but she continued to smile, feeling lighter than she had in months. “I do. I’m going to have a little girl, and you’re going to be my person.”

“Fantastic.” Nadine sipped her iced tea. “Does your person get to go shopping for baby stuff? Because I love shopping for baby stuff.”

Corinthos Penthouse: Living Room

Sonny looked up as Jason entered. “Hey…thanks for waiting until Courtney left.” He rubbed the back of his neck, as if exhausted from the worry of the last month.

Jason nodded. “It’s just easier if we avoid each other,” he said. “We had a fight on the docks last week and I just…” He rubbed a hand over his face. “I’m not in a hurry to hurt her again.”

“Yeah, I hear that.” Sonny reached for a file. “I heard from Stan and Benny. Ric’s still in the wind. He and Faith are just…gone.”

Jason scowled. “Any chance the Families took care of things and are just keeping it quiet?” He shifted. “I want him out of our lives, Sonny. I’ve spent almost every waking hour tracking him this last month, but I’m coming up as empty as Stan and Benny.” He shook his head. “He shouldn’t be able to disappear like this.”

“I know, I know.” Sonny sighed and poured himself a whiskey. “I have a meeting with the Families in a few days to confirm the rumors about your kid and ask to them to step up their search.” He sipped his drink and Jason became wary, as a familiar light entered his eyes. “Jason, we gotta talk.”

“We’re not having this conversation again—” Jason stopped when Sonny held up his hand.

“I have Francis, Cody and Marco reporting to me as well,” Sonny told him and Jason frowned at this, wondering why Sonny would force Elizabeth’s security detail to report to both of them. “Because I’m concerned…” He hesitated. “I’m concerned that you’re not doing your part.”

He knew he wasn’t, and he was painfully aware of it the few times Elizabeth had contacted him and he’d responded through her guards. He didn’t need Sonny lecturing him. “I’m tracking Ric to keep her safe—”

“I get that, and it’s important.” Sonny nodded, and pressed his hand to his chest. “But we gotta keep up appearances. You know that. You don’t ask the guards for anything other than to confirm she’s still breathing.”

Jason frowned. “They’re not there to spy—”

“I’m not…” Sonny rolled his eyes. “You’re not talking to her about her condition, and her guards are painfully aware of this since they’re herding her to work and the hospital without you being there. Jason, we’re asking them to protect Elizabeth with their lives because she’s carrying your child, but the guards just see you not giving a damn.”

His hand fisted at his side. “Are they not paying attention?” Jason demanded. “Because if they’re screwing around with her protection because they don’t think I’m involved—”

“No,” Sonny cut in swiftly. “But you’re not earning any points with these men, and they need to believe they can respect you. They see this woman going through a tough pregnancy alone, coming close to being the town pariah and…” He shrugged. “You know. It’s not helping. They don’t say anything to me, but I can see it in their faces. Cody’s with her when she’s working most of the time, and it’s painful when he tells me the things people are saying. He’s not spying, he just wants me to be aware of the trouble Elizabeth is having, and he tells me because you don’t ask.”

His chest tight, Jason swallowed. “What…what trouble is she having?”

Sonny sipped his whiskey. “Alan and Monica always know when she’s at the hospital. She had an appointment earlier today and they cornered her outside, according to Francis. He came by after the shift change. They want to know if Lila will be able to see the baby, if maybe Elizabeth will come by once in a while, so they can get to know her as the mother of their grandchild. Emily gives her hard time, always sits in her section at Kelly’s and then has some rude comments. Cody used to stand outside, but the first time Elizabeth came out in tears, he asked Bobbie if he could set up shop inside while she was working.”

Jason exhaled. “I’m sure there’s more,” he said. “What else aren’t you telling me?”

“You may not listen to rumors, but Carly told me that Courtney is wondering if what people saying is true. That Elizabeth didn’t know which one was the father, and picked you because you have more money. There are too many people speculating about this baby, and you’re not around to cement this notion in people’s heads.”

“Courtney told Carly…” Jason repeated. “What did Carly tell her?”

“I told her that you and I had argued about it.” Carly stepped off the stairs. “That I hadn’t gotten much from you, but during one of my arguments with Elizabeth that I’ve never had, she led me to believe the time frame doesn’t work. I assured her that you had not a single doubt.”

Sonny and Jason stared at her. She raised an eyebrow. “What, I should tell her the truth?”

“Carly,” Jason growled. “You know the truth. I told you the truth.”

“Yeah…” Carly planted one hand on her hip. “Yeah, you did. Which is why I told Courtney no doubts exist.” She flicked her eyes to Sonny. “I thought about talking to Mama where I know Amy Vining would overhear, so my convictions would be on record with the rest of the town.”

“Carly,” Jason began, pinching the bridge of his nose. Christ, if Carly knew the truth, this plan was doomed.

“Relax, Jase.” Carly patted his shoulder. “I’m not plotting, I’m not planning. I don’t even want you guys to tell me the truth, because then I can honestly say I only know what I’m told.” She shrugged. “You’re the father. Message received. I’m just saying that we need to take measures to make sure everyone else knows that.” She eyed him with annoyance. “Especially if you’re going to continue ignoring her and making Sonny chase you down with medical forms.”

“I didn’t know she needed me to fill out anything,” Jason retorted, wondering why he was letting Carly bait him like this. God, she was so frustrating sometimes.

“Well, no doubt since you always pawn her off on guards,” Carly said, her eyes wide. “You think I don’t notice? Elizabeth was upset and embarrassed when she came to the penthouse because you weren’t home. Again. And she told Sonny that she’d tried to call you, and that you told Francis you were going to be unavailable all week.”

“You weren’t in the room when Elizabeth was here,” Sonny remarked, putting his whiskey down. “What have I told you about eavesdropping?”

Carly dismissed him with a wave. “Unimportant. I’m not telling you what to do, Jase, because you won’t listen to me anyway, but I am the only person in this room who’s ever been pregnant, so let me give you the inside information she won’t.” She glared at Jason.

“Pregnancy is god damned stressful enough without being treated like the town whore. There is a person growing inside and it’s our responsibility to give the kid nourishment and a safe environment. Having to be looked like nothing better than dirt every time you leave your home is not conducive to safe pregnancy.” She folded her arms under breasts. “I went through that with Michael. I dealt with that before I lost our first child, Sonny. And now every time I go to Kelly’s, Elizabeth is fielding whispers and looks from everyone, including your annoying twit of a sister, Jase.”

“What’s your point?” Jason said spreading his hands out. “What do you want me to do? I can’t change what people say or do.”

“You could yell at your holier-than-thou sister,” Carly retorted. “You could maybe drop in Kelly’s once in a while and pretend you don’t see the mother of your child as an obligation, a burden, or worse, a horrible mistake. You could go to a damned doctor’s appointment. You’re the one who keeps telling me this is your kid, Jason Morgan.” She narrowed her eyes. “So act like it.”

It’s down to this
I’ve got to make this life make sense
Can anyone tell what I’ve done
I miss the life
I miss the colors of the world
Can anyone tell where I am?
– Away From The Sun, 3 Doors Down

Saturday, May 24, 2003

Kelly’s: Dining Room

It was one of those unlucky days of the week when Penny’s school schedule forced Bobbie to schedule Courtney and Elizabeth on the quiet morning shift. Elizabeth was surprised by how the two of them had managed to co-exist for the last month. Of all the people who had raged and insulted her this last month, Courtney had been the only not to say anything to her face. Elizabeth would have preferred her anger—the quiet desperation the blonde utilized to pretend that nothing had changed made her guilt so much sharper.

But there were moments when Elizabeth felt completely in sync with Courtney, and it was standing behind the counter as a new pot of coffee brewed while Courtney organized a few receipts that they felt…almost united. The stares and whispers of their patrons were impossible to ignore, and Elizabeth could feel the heat of those eyes on her eye as she kept her eyes down.

“I hate them all,” Courtney hissed. “Look at them, watching us, hoping like hell I’ll go for your hair or something. It’s disgusting. They have nothing better to do than comment on our lives.” She flicked her blue eyes to Elizabeth, and Elizabeth was unsurprised at the anger burning there. “I hate you and I hate Jason for what you did to me. If he wanted to be with you, he should have just left me instead of cheating, and maybe you think I deserved having it done to me because I know you think I went after him last fall—”

“Courtney, no,” Elizabeth said softly. “No, it’s not—”

“But I’ll be damned if my private life is going to be on display,” Courtney cut in. “So this…” She gestured at the space between them. “This is a neutral zone. We’re going to do our jobs and confuse the shit out of everyone else. But outside this restaurant, Elizabeth, I want you to cross the street when you see me and I hope like I hell I’ve found a better job once your bastard begins to show.”

She grabbed a pot of the now finished coffee and went onto the floor to serve. Elizabeth sighed and rubbed her eyes. When the front door of Kelly’s opened to reveal Nadine coming in with a smile for her, she felt her own mouth curving into a matching one. Since meeting her a few days earlier, she and Nadine had gone out to lunch twice. Francis had been nervous about escorting Elizabeth to Eli’s both times because it was inherently insecure, but Elizabeth had craved the normalcy.

“Good morning,” Nadine all but sang out as she sat down. “Green tea if it’s available.” Elizabeth flipped her mug over and poured it, setting a tea bag next to it. “Do you have a break coming soon? I have to head to work in a half hour.”

“I’m due for fifteen minutes soon, but…” Elizabeth hesitated. “It’s just me and Courtney today, and I always hate asking her. It’s…hard enough.”

“Oh, the other woman,” Nadine murmured. She flicked her eyes to the doors where the blonde had disappeared into the kitchen. “Well, yeah, I figure.”

“But I’m entitled to one and she literally just declared this restaurant a neutral zone.” Elizabeth glanced over as Courtney reappeared and joined them behind the counter. “It’s slow. So I’m going to take my fifteen.”

“Sure. Whatever.”

Elizabeth poured herself a cup of tea and gestured towards the courtyard. “Let’s go outside. It’s gorgeous out.”

“Sure thing.” As they walked out of the restaurant, Elizabeth saw Francis out of the corner of her eye, standing up and following them.

As they sat down at one of the empty tables, Nadine watched Francis head to the courtyard entrance to take his position. “You know, you don’t have to worry about me being uncomfortable with your guards.”

Elizabeth sighed and stirred sugar into her tea. “I’m lucky that Jason assigned me familiar faces, and it’s not so bad. But I know people look at me weird—”

“No, seriously.” Nadine hesitated. “Look, the reason I stopped by this morning is because I heard from my jerk ex-boyfriend, and I realized this might be something we can totally bond over.” She met Elizabeth’s eyes. “Have you ever heard of Anthony Zacchara?”

Elizabeth blinked and tilted her head. She tried to keep up on the people in Jason’s world, always worried for his safety, but the name was only vaguely familiar. “Somewhat, but not really.”

“Well, he lives and works out of Crimson Pointe,” Nadine explained, referring to a small town outside of New York City. “But his son Johnny lives in Manhattan.” She bit her lip. “We dated for almost a year.”

Elizabeth raised her eyebrows in surprise. “I wouldn’t have guessed.”

“I’m not proud of it, but Johnny was never involved in his father’s business. At least, not when we met.” Nadine flushed and looked away. “He was an investor in a medical clinic I was working at, and he flirted with me. He has a great smile, and he’s wickedly charming.” She closed her eyes. “And things were amazing for six months.”

“And then?” Elizabeth prompted.

“And then, his father had a stroke,” Nadine continued. “And Johnny’s sister and his dad’s lawyer kept trying to get him involved. Johnny was torn because he thought he had a duty to keep his sister out of things, but he still didn’t really want to do anything.”

“But he did,” Elizabeth guessed and Nadine nodded. “Is that why you broke up?”

“I wish, because at least I could have walked away with some good memories, but Johnny never does anything in half-measures.” She blew out an exasperated breath. “I guess he figured I wasn’t going to stick around, or maybe he was tired of me. It’s hard to know why because the lousy bastard never says anything. He just…he wouldn’t call for days at a time, and he stopped talking to me about a future. I hadn’t even really broached anything, but we’d…discussed moving in together.” Nadine sipped her tea. “And that all just stopped. He stopped being this amazing man and turned into this complete asshole who didn’t call, didn’t come over, but got angry every time I asked him why he was pulling away. I couldn’t deal with it anymore, so I broke up with him and found a new job.”

“Nadine, I’m so sorry.” Elizabeth reached over and squeezed her hand. “That must have been so difficult. I know what it’s like to be with someone who is absolutely incredible one day, and the next, it’s like you never knew him at all.”

“Anyway, he called me which pissed me off because I really didn’t want him to know where I was.” She huffed. “He told me I left some CDs at his place and did I want them. I told him he could throw them out a window, himself along with them.” She shook her head. “I was just so annoyed, and then I realized that I hadn’t mentioned I was connected to the Zaccharas, even a little, which I know enough about this world to understand that if I’m not upfront with it, it may come up later and you’ll wonder why I never said anything.”

“I appreciate it, Nadine, I really do.” Elizabeth smiled. “Honesty is great, and you’re right, if I didn’t know it now, I might have been upset later simply because…” She stared down at her hands. “I’ve learned the hard way to wonder about people and their motives.”

“You know, Elizabeth, I get we’ve known each other for five minutes,” Nadine said hesitantly, “but you really can talk to me.”

“I would if I thought it make a difference to talk about it, but trust me, Nadine,” Elizabeth leaned back in her chair and sighed, “verbalizing the crappy choices I’ve made only makes me feel worse about them, so it’s better if I just…don’t. For now.”

“No problem.” Nadine checked her watch. “I better get to the hospital and you better get in before the other woman comes out here.”

“Technically, I think I’m supposed to be other woman,” Elizabeth said, with a smile she wouldn’t have expected. Nadine shrugged.

“Yeah, but who cares about technicalities?” Her breezy smile and light hug before she left gave Elizabeth the strength to head back and complete the last four hours of her shift.

General Hospital: Monica Quartermaine’s Office

Monica smiled brightly when she opened her door and let Jason enter. “I didn’t believe Margo when she told me you were out here, but here you are.” She gestured to the sofa. “Sit, sit. Tell me what brings you around the hospital.”

Jason sighed, but did so because this visit was going to be difficult enough without making it more complicated. “I wanted to talk to you and hope that you could talk to the family for me.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I know you and Alan have…” He didn’t want to say harassed or bothered, but he was sure the characterization wasn’t too far off. “I guess you heard that Elizabeth and I are…that is, we’re…” He exhaled shortly, hoping she would take his difficulty as not liking to speak to the Quartermaines about his personal life rather the difficulty in saying these words out loud. “That she’s pregnant.”

Monica smiled, almost sheepishly. “We have. And I know that we might have come on too strong with Elizabeth. We just…” She spread her hands out. “We like her so much, Jason, and I was so sorry when things didn’t work out for you two last summer.”

He closed his eyes and hoped for the strength to get through this, to say words that weren’t true and some that he wouldn’t mind if they were, and not have it all seem like a jumbled mess. “I know….but…it’s not…” He paused. “We’re not really together right now. I mean, we’re not…”

“Jason, it’s okay, you don’t have to explain yourself to me.” Monica hesitantly reached out and covered one of his hands with hers. “You and Elizabeth will figure this out for yourselves.”

“I…it just came at a difficult time and it’s not the way I would have wanted to do it,” he said, knowing those words, at least, were the honest truth. “I hurt Courtney when I didn’t want to, and I haven’t been as supportive to Elizabeth as I should have been.”

He knew she was wondering why he was telling her these things, but Jason knew that his mother would immediately tell Alan, and somehow it would travel the hospital grapevine that Elizabeth had his support and that he knew her child to be his. “And maybe you heard some rumors—”

“I don’t pay attention to rumors like that,” Monica shook her head firmly. “The ones accusing Elizabeth of picking the richer man. I know her better than that, and I know you better than that. So don’t you worry about that. I told Amy Vining so myself, and I saw Carly complaining about how people were badmouthing you to Bobbie.”

Jason closed his eyes, annoyed Carly had helped despite his best efforts. She was right, he was going to have to do more to act like the father of this child, but he just…

He knew that he was going to find Ric and deal with him. And when Elizabeth was safe, she could take her baby and herself and walk out of his life again. He couldn’t imagine why she’d stay now when she never had before.

“Thank you.” Jason hesitated. “And if you could talk to Emily. She’s been very angry at Elizabeth, and it upsets her that her best friend is treating her that way.”

“I can try, Jason, but…” Monica sighed. “Emily’s stubborn and she may not listen.” She took a chance and rested her hand on his shoulder. “I’m sure Courtney is very nice, but can I say again how much I really do like Elizabeth. I know it’s wrong, but I like that she’s separate from Sonny.”

Jason blinked at her and shook his head. “I don’t—”

“Robin was close to Stone and Sonny,” Monica said slowly, “and Carly ended up with Sonny. Courtney is Sonny’s sister, so the women you’ve been involved with seriously up until now have always been…connected to Sonny.” Jason tensed, but Monica continued. “I just…I like that Elizabeth is something—someone—separate. That you met her away from Sonny, and she’s yours in a way that no one else has been.”

Jason exhaled slowly and looked away. Monica was right of course—Elizabeth was only connected to Sonny now because of him. Because he had cared for her, and Ric Lansing had utilized those emotions to gain leverage against his half-brother. Was that why he and Elizabeth had never worked outside the studio, outside their own world? Because she was so separate from everyone else in his life that he’d been unable to find a balance?

“I’m sorry, Jason, I don’t always know when to shut up and stop pushing,” Monica said, her face stricken. “I just want you to be happy.”

“I know.” Jason squeezed her hand on top of his. “I’m trying to be. I just wanted you to know what was going on.”

“Thank you.” Monica smiled but wagged a finger at him. “Now you take care of Elizabeth and see that her blood pressure stays down.” When he only looked at her blankly, her cheeks flushed. “I may have…asked your father to keep track of Elizabeth’s charts. Just to…” She cleared her throat. “Her blood pressure was elevated at the last two visits. If Dr. Lee sees it again next month, she may put Elizabeth on bed rest.”

“I’ll make sure she takes care of herself,” Jason said, worried and filled with guilt that he had avoided Elizabeth for so long. He stood. “But if you could stop looking up Elizabeth’s chart, I’d appreciate it.”

“Right, of course.” Monica stood, embarrassed. “I just…I’m concerned. I have one grandchild I’m unlikely to know, I suppose I just…wanted…” She trailed off.

“I’ll ask Elizabeth to keep you informed of any changes,” Jason said, because he didn’t know what else to say. There was little chance Sonny or Carly would ever allow Michael to know the Quartermaines Jason actually liked, and this child…

This child was unlikely to be in his life long enough to matter.

No Name Restaurant: Back Room

Sonny leaned back in his chair, knowing that Johnny and Milo were behind him. He hated meeting the representatives from the other Families on the East Coast, but he’d promised Jason that he’d do whatever it took to keep Elizabeth safe.

He glanced at Sammy Tagliatti, from Philadelphia, whom he loathed for his lack of respect to Carly the previous fall and to the other men, whom he rarely saw. Anthony Zacchara, who controlled most of lower New York, Hector Ruiz from Miami and Daniel Vega from Boston. In fact, now that Sonny reflected upon it—he hated all these men. Ruthless bastards willing to do anything to survive with little consideration for collateral damage.

“Well, Corinthos, I suppose you’re finally deigning to confirm the rumors we’ve been hearing for almost a month,” Daniel Vega remarked, sipping from a tumbler of Scotch.

“I am,” Sonny nodded. He looked to Anthony Zacchara, and the man standing behind him. “But since this is the first time we’ve met since last fall, we should congratulate Zacchara on his recovery.”

Anthony Zacchara scowled. “Like you give a damn—”

“And ask why his lawyer’s son slithered into my town without mentioning his connection you or to my mother.” Sonny looked at Trevor Lansing, who blanched slightly. “Or were we going to pretend that the man who embezzled from Vega and Ruiz wasn’t connected to you?”

Both men eyed the older man with mixtures of suspicion and loathing. “Were you behind this attack?” Ruiz snarled. Sonny smirked, knowing that Ruiz had two of the most lethal and dangerous sons in the business.

“No,” Trevor said immediately and Anthony glared at him, as if for daring to speak. “I’m sorry, Anthony, but I gotta tell them Richard and I don’t speak. We’ve had no contact since he graduated law school.” He smoothed a hand down his tie and met Sonny’s eyes. “And I know what we’re here to discuss. I have no objections.”

“We’ll be keeping our eye on you,” Tagliatti murmured. “But, Corinthos, where is Jason Morgan? Should he not be here to relate the happy news?”

“Jason’s busy protecting his family,” Sonny said carelessly. “Ric Lansing came after his ex-girlfriend because of the connection, he came after my wife to gain leverage. We’re just lucky Elizabeth saw through his act.”

“Did she?” Ruiz murmured, raising an eyebrow. “I have heard stories to the contrary.”

“It’s true that like the rest of us,” Sonny stressed, “Elizabeth was initially taken in by Lansing. But she was upset and hurt. She and Jason had broken up. They both made mistakes, but they have worked out their differences, mostly because Jason learned Ric was targeting the woman he loves and put aside what broke them apart.” He raised an eyebrow. “They’re having a child and Ric has threatened that child because he’s angry Elizabeth threw him over and went back to Jason.”

“Does that sound like the son you raised?” Tagliatti demanded of Trevor. “Would he go after a woman just because she left him?”

Trevor arched an eyebrow. “Richard isn’t known for subtlety. He hates Corinthos because his mother chose him rather than my son to raise. He blames him for her death.” His eyes hardened. “As do I.”

“But why should we waste our resources looking for this man?” Vega cut in. “It’s over a woman. A paltry thing, really. If she was reckless enough to get involved with him, shouldn’t she deserve everything she gets—”

He was glad he’d told Jason he would handle this alone because it was likely Jason would have found it difficult not to react to such a response. “This woman,” Sonny repeated, “has been nothing but loyal to me and Jason for years. When Moreno’s men shot Jason, she kept him alive. When Sorel put a bomb in her apartment, she did not go to the police with what she knew. When I needed Jason in town to investigate a traitor that was disrupting our profits,” he said to Tagliatti and Zacchara, whose territories were often intertwined with his own, “Elizabeth hid him in her apartment without a word to anyone. She has been kidnapped by Roscoe’s men, shot at by Alcazar’s goons and now, because she made the mistake of trusting a man that the rest of you trusted as well, you think I should leave her to the dogs?”

Ruiz sat back in his chair and nodded. “Loyal women are hard to find,” he admitted. He glanced at Zacchara, who had notoriously shot his own wife during one his rages. “And sometimes, harder to keep since they expect so much of you.” He cleared his throat. “Ric Lansing stole much money from me, and for this, I would like to see him roasted over a pit of coals, but I also do not like what I hear about threatening a pregnant woman. It’s…uncouth. I’ve had to reprimand my own sons when they’ve strayed from honorable actions.”

“I hate Ric Lansing as much as the rest of you,” Vega said. “I don’t care much for this woman and looking for him in order to protect her doesn’t appeal much to me. Her protection is not my concern. However, I find Faith Roscoe to be a boil on humanity. If she is working with him, then I think it’s for the good of the business that we exterminate them both.”

“I don’t much enjoy things that cut into my profits,” Tagliatti said. “And there’s no doubt Lansing and Roscoe did so.” He flicked his dark eyes to Zacchara, the last of the four men. “But will Zacchara agree to hunt down his lawyer’s son?”

“I got no problem with hunting down scum, but Ric Lansing ain’t come for me and mine,” Anthony snarled. “He didn’t take money from me and I got no sympathy for women who curl up to dangerous men and then cry about it later.”

Sonny tensed, but he knew Anthony Zacchara well enough to know what to say. “But, perhaps, as a sign of good faith that you weren’t involved in his plans,” he said softly. “You might consider offering your help. Your resources.”

Anthony narrowed his eyes. “I’m always one to preserve the peace,” he replied with a malicious smile. “Sure. You got my vote.”

“Well, that settles it.” Vega tossed back the rest of his Scotch. “Ric Lansing and Faith Roscoe are to be executed upon sight.”

Elizabeth Webber’s Studio

 

There was a knock on her door before Cody opened it. “Jason’s here to see you, Miss Webber.” Elizabeth frowned and looked at him oddly. She hadn’t had many visitors since this debacle began, but none of the guards had ever announced anyone. “Do you want him to come in?” His face was impassive, but there was a slight clenching in his jaw and suddenly she realized what was going on.

Jason had been by exactly twice since putting twenty-four protection on her, and the guards had had to take her to the doctor’s appointments and everywhere else. Elizabeth had embarrassed Cody last week by crying on the way home, showing off the sonogram of her child that was now framed on the table. Francis looked annoyed every time someone said something to her, and she knew he’d started the routine of coming into Kelly’s during her shift rather than being in the courtyard.

They were protecting her from being hurt, and clearly, they perceived Jason as a threat. Touched, but disturbed at the same time, Elizabeth set down the sketchbooks she had been stowing in a carton and shoved a stand of hair behind her ear. “Cody, Jason can come in any time he wants.” A smile tugged at her lips. “But thanks for checking.”

Jason was scowling slightly as Cody finally moved from the doorway and let him in. “I have had enough of this,” he muttered.

“Sorry…” Elizabeth dipped her chin, embarrassed. “Cody…he saw me crying last week after my appointment and I guess…” She shrugged. “You know, they don’t understand…” She bit her lip. “I had my first ultrasound and I had no one to show it to except my doctor and my nurse, so when Cody asked how my appointment went, I was just…” She stopped, realizing he looked irritated. “I’m sorry, that’s not why you’re here. Did something happen? I don’t…I don’t want to keep you.”

“I came to apologize,” Jason said, but her heart sank. She suspected that Sonny had said something after the medical history fiasco or maybe one of her guards had let their own annoyance slip.

“No, Jason…” Elizabeth stepped forward. “Please. I-I know that there are some people who might…I’m sure Sonny said something about you not…” Feeling awkward, she wrapped her arms around herself. “I never told anyone I expected you to be involved, and I am so sorry if anyone—”

“That’s not…” Jason rested his hands at his waist, looked down and took a deep breath. “Yeah, Sonny and Carly don’t think I’m doing enough, and I can’t get a read on whether Carly actually knows or just suspects, but she read me the riot act.”

Elizabeth sighed and started to rake her hands through hair, tugging out the messy ponytail. “This is a disaster.” For want of something to do so she didn’t have to look at him, she continued to pack up her sketchbooks, books and other miscellaneous papers. “I don’t know what we’re supposed to do about other people, how to manage their expectations.”

“You told me when we started this that I wasn’t thinking this through, and I…you were right.” Elizabeth blinked and turned to look at him. He scratched the back of his neck. “I didn’t think any further than protecting you, and I thought this would be the best way—”

“We can still change our minds,” she said softly. She stared down at the magazine in her hands, wondering why she wasn’t just tossing it away. “Maybe Ric and Faith are cutting their losses. You can—”

“Elizabeth, we just have…” He was quiet for a long moment. “We have to figure out how to do this without…complicating things.”

Logically she understood that the heart was a muscle, and that emotions came from the brain, but Elizabeth could feel the weight settle on her chest, could literally feel the ache spreading to her limbs. “You mean how to make people think you’re the father of my child without actually having to be the father of my child.” She closed her eyes and willed the tears to stay away. How could she not be out of tears? Why couldn’t she be one of those women who had problems with tear production?

“I…” When Jason’s voice faltered, she looked up and sighed. He looked helpless, as if he hadn’t wanted to say that but that it had been exactly what he meant.

“Jason,” Elizabeth said, turning back towards him. “The only way this is going to work is if we’re honest with each other. We have to lie to the rest of the world, we shouldn’t lie to each other. I can’t…” She paused, swallowing hard. “I can’t blame you if you don’t actually want to be involved, but if we were still friends, you’d be…” Elizabeth shrugged. “I don’t know, friends ask about health and how doctor’s appointments went and sometimes they go. For support.” When he said nothing to that, she bit her lip. “Or you just ask if I’m alive and once a year, we have lunch. I can’t help you with this, Jason, if you don’t talk to me.”

“I’m sorry, you’re right.” Jason lowered himself to the sofa. “I just…I don’t know how to do this. I know that Monica and Alan have been…overly interested in your case, so I talked to Monica about backing off.”

“Jason…” Elizabeth sighed. Trust Jason to warn away the only people remotely interested in her pregnancy, even if it was for the wrong reasons. “They weren’t really bothering me. They just…want to be connected to you.” She hesitated. “But I understand that you don’t want them to led on about a possible grandchild, so—”

“I told Monica that if they left you alone and stopped looking up your records, you’d be more likely to tell her what’s going on,” Jason interrupted.

“Oh my God.” Elizabeth sat next to him on the couch. “Jason, are you listening to yourself? You just promised your mother that I would keep her informed about a child you’re not raising!” She covered her face with her hands. “This is insane, Jason. It’s always been insane. And we cannot keep this up. We can’t.”

“We have to—”

She snapped her head up. “No, then I can’t. Do you understand this is so much worse than it was that December people thought we were sleeping together?” She dug the heels of her hands into her eyes. “We are lying to everyone, and it’s just not going to work, because we don’t know how this is going to play out. Jason, what if we never find Ric?”

“That’s…” Jason shook his head. “We can’t think like that—”

“I have to think like that.” Elizabeth felt like wrapping her hands around his throat because he just wasn’t getting it. “Jason, I need you to listen to me. I am pregnant. No matter who people think the father of this child is, I am having one. She is going to be here in six months. Do you get that? I am dodging your ex-girlfriend, your sister, your parents, and your best friends who are all judging me, all making my life a living hell in their own special ways. I am trying like hell to keep my head on straight, and you are making this impossible.”

Jason got to his feet and if she thought he was irritated before, now he was simply angry. “I’m making this impossible? Are you serious, Elizabeth? I have done nothing but look for Ric for the last month. I’ve barely slept!” He jabbed a finger at her. “I didn’t get us in this situation—”

“The hell you didn’t!” Elizabeth launched up, her ears ringing. “You decided I needed rescuing and told him I was having your child. This was your goddamned idea. I begged you to tell people the truth! I told you this wouldn’t work and you kept telling me you wouldn’t end up hating me!” Her voice broke on the last word, but she struggled to continue. “And you’re so angry at me because I got myself pregnant by a psychotic freak that you can barely stand to look at me!”

“That’s not…” Frustrated, he groaned and slid his hands into his hair, actually pulling at it. “Damn it, Elizabeth.”

“Well, I’m sorry, but I am drowning here. Everyone is angry at me, I get it. Everyone blames me. Well, I can’t change what happened. I don’t know what you want me to do. You won’t tell anyone the truth, and then you’re angry that people don’t think you’re stepping up.” She clenched her fists in front him. “And I am begging you to tell me what you want to do, because you’re not listening to me. Do you want to tell people the truth or do you just want to tell them that the baby is a mistake?” Tears slid down her cheeks. “You wouldn’t even be lying, because you do think that. You think my baby is a mistake, that maybe I’m too stupid to be a mother, that I don’t deserve to have a child—”

She stopped when he reached out and covered her clenched hands with his. “Just…just stop.” Jason lowered his head and took a deep breath. “You’re right. This isn’t going to work if we’re not honest with each other.”

“Okay.” Elizabeth nodded, taking a shaky breath.

“And Monica told me that your blood pressure has been high, that your doctor will want to put you on bed rest if it doesn’t come down, so let’s just…” He gently pushed her to sit down. “Let’s just stop arguing.”

“Okay.” Everything inside her ached, because she knew he was only being nice now because she’d been crying, because he was worried about her health. “Please, Jason, let’s just tell the truth, and try—”

“If Ric thinks this is my child, he may want to come after you as revenge, but he won’t be ruthless about it, not the way he would if he thought it was his own.” Jason hesitated. “He’d be relentless if he knew the truth, and that’s not a risk I’m willing to take. Are you?”

“No,” Elizabeth admitted.

“Okay. So we have to…we have to figure a way forward.” He stared at their joined hands. “I do not think your child is a mistake, Elizabeth, and I am so sorry if for one minute, you think I am blaming you in this situation, okay?” He tilted her chin up to look at him. “We have been so worried about protecting you and keeping this lie that we haven’t…you haven’t even been allowed to be happy. To think about becoming a mother.”

“My nurse asked me if I was excited last week and I started to cry,” she confessed. “Because it was the first time anyone had asked, and I hadn’t…I hadn’t thought about it until then.” She took a deep breath. “I wish that this were happening any other way, but I want…I want my child.” She felt her lips curve and looked away. “I want this baby so much, so if you tell me that this is the best way to keep her safe, I’ll agree.”

Jason let their hands fall away and he was quiet for a moment. “Sonny has already told the Families that this is my child, and gained their cooperation in hunting Ric and Faith down, so at this point…”

“We can’t change our minds,” Elizabeth murmured. “Because he lied to them.” She sighed. “Okay, well, there’s an argument I can’t dismiss. Sonny went to bat for me, we’ll have to make this work.”

“Let’s just…” Jason hesitated. “Let’s just take it one day at a time. I’ll go to some doctor’s appointments, and we’ll have lunch together in public a couple of times. You can tell Monica what’s going on, and I’ll try to keep Emily from arguing with you in public. Can that….can that be enough for now?”

The weight on her chest only grew heavier. If they had still been friends, truly friends, she would not have had to convince Jason to offer this type of support. He would have seen her struggling alone and done what he could to alleviate the stress. If he’d known being alone at the appointments would be difficult, he would have volunteered. He would met her for coffee without looking as though his arm was twisted.

She didn’t think he was going through all this trouble due to a sense of obligation or pity, but she also knew that they were never going to truly be friends again, and somehow, the loss of that was so much more difficult than accepting that they were never going to be together romantically.

But he looked so tired that Elizabeth finally nodded. “I think that will help the rumors,” she replied quietly. “One day at a time.”

I know I let you down
Again and again
I know I never really treated you right
I’ve paid the price
I’m still paying for it every day
– I Don’t Know You Anymore, Savage Garden

Friday, June 6, 2003

Kelly’s: Dining Room

Another tense dinner shift with Courtney. Elizabeth wished she could find another job—she wished Courtney would find another job. Something to keep her from having to see Jason’s ex-girlfriend three times a week for hours on end. Courtney’s earlier apathy towards the entire situation had begun to wane this week, since Elizabeth had tied her apron and they had both realized that her waist had thickened. Just a little—but enough so Courtney realized that this wasn’t some sort of lie. Elizabeth really was pregnant.

In the two weeks since she and Jason had come their sort of agreement as to how to go on in this situation, he’d been true to his word. He had come by Kelly’s twice for lunch, and once for breakfast, letting the people see them together. He asked after her health in general, but he’d never asked about the baby again.

She was going to take what she could get. There was still no sign of Ric or Faith, or least none that Sonny or Jason were reporting to her, so Elizabeth was keeping her head down and trying to do this one day at a time, but she knew that she had decisions to make. She was in her fourth month—only five left before she was going to be a mother.

The only bright spot had been her burgeoning friendship with Nadine Crowell. The vivacious nurse had invited her out for dinners at Eli’s that still drove Cody and Marco, her evening guards, insane, but Elizabeth loved bonding with someone who was completely unconnected to Jason Morgan, since it appeared that her friendship with Emily was on permanent hiatus.

“I think Table Six wants their check,” Courtney said shortly, setting the coffee pot back on the burner. “They’ve been making those faces.”

“I’ve got it.” Elizabeth reached into her apron pocket to withdraw the check from her final table of the night. “Thanks.”

“Quicker you get them out of here, the quicker I can go home.”

“No argument here,” Elizabeth murmured. She smiled brightly at the couple seated just inside the doors. “Can I get you anything else?”

After dispatching the table and collecting their payment and her tip, she returned to the counter. “I think we can close up.”

“Great.” Courtney untied her apron and shoved it in her purse. “If you don’t mind, I’m going to go. You can get Cody to help you clean up, can’t you?”

“I…” Elizabeth blinked. “It’s not really his job—”

“Like I give a crap.” Courtney swung her purse over her shoulders. “Or maybe you want to be alone with me so I can be reminded some more of how much I hate you.”

Elizabeth could see her future at Kelly’s spread out in front of her—Courtney using this terrible situation to duck out of any work possible, and Elizabeth’s guilt at the lie preventing her from arguing the point.

“Fine.” Elizabeth glanced at Cody, who was seated silently at the counter, nursing a glass of iced tea. “Do you mind, Cody?”

“No problem, Miss Webber.” Cody straightened. “Good night, Miss Matthews.”

“Go to hell,” Courtney tossed over her shoulder as she left through the back door.

Elizabeth’s shoulders slumped and she took a brief moment to collect herself. “I’m sorry, Cody. I know it’s not your job description, but honestly, it’s just easier—”

“No problem, Miss Webber,” Cody repeated. He stood and came around the counter to retrieve a plastic bin and wet a washcloth for the tables. “I’ve sat here enough nights to know how it’s done.”

Elizabeth smiled and called into the back to let the cook know he could switch off and clean up the back. She began to organize receipts and the deposit to put in the safe for Bobbie in the morning. “Are you ever going to call me Elizabeth?” she asked.

“It’s unlikely, Miss Webber.” But Elizabeth heard the humor in his voice and decided that it wasn’t worth arguing at the moment. Her guards were sweet teddy bears who still bristled when Jason was around, and she knew Jason hated the dirty looks from the three men entrusted with her safety.

“I’m sure Courtney will calm down eventually,” Elizabeth said, “and she’ll stop forcing the extra work on me, so I hope this…that this doesn’t go in any report to Sonny or Jason.”

Cody remained silent as he washed down another table. She narrowed her eyes. “Cody, I’m serious. Courtney has a right be upset—”

“With all due respect, Miss Webber,” Cody said, stacking a chair on a table. “She had a right two months ago. It’s not as though she and Jason were engaged. She’s only holding on to the anger because she knows how guilty you feel.” His cheeks flushed slightly and he moved on to clear, clean and stack another table.

Elizabeth rubbed her eyes. “She’s just…upset this week. I knew when I began to show…it would make things worse.” She dumped the last of the coffee pots. “But you’re right, Cody. I can’t let her get to me. It’s not like Jason and I are dating now. I didn’t steal her boyfriend.” She hesitated. “I guess I merely…borrowed him.”

Cody snorted. “You’re not kidding,” he muttered.

“What was that?” Elizabeth arched an eyebrow. “Cody, you, Marco, and Francis have got to stop irritating Jason. He’s doing the best he can—”

“Again, with respect, Miss Webber, Jason Morgan is a good man. I am extremely loyal to him,” Cody said, stacking up the last table. “And I would give my life for him. That being said, he’s goddamn moron who doesn’t understand how lucky he is.” He coughed. “Such as it is.”

“Still.” Elizabeth couldn’t fight the small smile. At least there were people still on her side—even if they were paid to be.

Kelly’s: Courtyard

Elizabeth waited for Cody to do a sweep of the courtyard before she followed him outside. “Just let me lock the door,” she said, turning with her keys in hand.

Just as she slipped the key into the tumbler, she heard a muffled swear and a gloved hand slid over her mouth, an arm around her waist. She tried to force out a scream as she was lifted into the air. As her captor swung her around—probably trying to make a quick escape to the parking lot—she saw Cody struggling with another man.

Get away. Get away. Have to get away. Can’t let Ric get my baby. With all her strength and visualizing the courtyard in her mind, she launched her weight against the man holding he, cracking the top of her head against his jaw, and kicking back w  ith her legs. They went sprawling into the tables, his grip released enough that Elizabeth could scramble away. She started for the door, but somehow…

She knew she would never make it in time. Kneecaps. Kneecaps. She whirled around, stunned by how close the hulking shape was to her, but she couldn’t let the fear freeze her. She kicked out with her leg toward his knees and with a grunt, the man crumpled to the ground. He started to rise, but Elizabeth grabbed one of the nearby chairs and swung it over his heard, crashing it over his head.

“Elizabeth, run!” She heard Cody grunt, but Elizabeth just…couldn’t. A piece of the chair was still in her hand, so she just started hitting her would-be kidnapper. She kept swinging and swinging, as pieces of it continued to break off, until the man stopped moving.

“Miss Webber…” Cody was breathing heavily. “I got this.” He put his hand on her shoulder and Elizabeth stumbled back towards Kelly’s, her eyes wide, her breaths shallow. “It’s all right.” He gestured towards the end of the courtyard. “My guy is out, too. I gotta get them tied up and inside the restaurant, out of sight. Can you call Sonny and Jason? We need a cleanup crew. I gotta get this done.” He held out his cell phone.

Elizabeth closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “Yes. Yes.” She took the phone from him, and then looked up. “I didn’t…I’m sorry I didn’t run.”

“Well…” Cody looked down at the incapacitated man at their feet. “I guess it worked out this time. Call Jason, Elizabeth. It’ll be okay.”

She nodded and punched in the number. Jason’s voice came over the line, sounding worried. “Cody, what’s up? Is Elizabeth all right?”

“J-Jason, it’s me. Cody and I were…attacked outside of Kelly’s.” She took a deep breath.

“Elizabeth—”

“We’re, um, okay, but he’s dragging the guys inside and he says he needs a clean-up crew.” She dragged her free hand through her hair. “I went for the knees, just like you told me.”

“I’ll be right there. Sonny and I will be right there.” The line went dead, and Elizabeth hurried to hold the door open for Cody as he started to drag the first man in.

Harborview Towers: Penthouse Level

Jason had been home when Elizabeth’s harried phone call had reached him. He’d taken only a second to tell Max outside Sonny’s door that they were needed at Kelly’s before jabbing at the elevator. He wanted to take the steps, but he knew the elevator was quicker. All he could hear was Elizabeth.

I went for the knees, just like you told me.

That meant the bastard had been close enough to grab her. He swore and jabbed the button again. Sonny’s door was yanked open and he was soon joined by Max and Sonny, Rocco stepping out and taking up Max’s post.

“What happened?” Sonny demanded as the elevator finally arrived and the trio were able to get inside for the parking garage.

“Elizabeth called me from Cody’s line. They were attacked at Kelly’s.” Jason wished he’d taken the steps just to have something to do. “She says they’re fine but they need a crew. I already called Johnny. He’ll meet us there, but damn it.” He punched the side of the car. “I should have doubled her guards. One wasn’t enough—”

“One is all I send with my own wife, Jason,” Sonny said, his voice level. “Unless we’re positive of a heightened threat, we don’t raise the security. The cops will get involved when they see that many men following one of us around. No way to know for sure Ric or Faith would come after her.”

“She told me she went for the knees,” Jason muttered. “Like I taught her. You know what means, Sonny. If she had to go for the knees, the piece of scum had his hands on her.”

The doors opened and Jason was about to go for his bike, but Sonny tugged him towards a waiting limo. “We’ll need to bring Elizabeth back here. We’ll call Harry to take a look at her, and if she’s cut up or hurt, you can’t bring her back on the bike.”

Hating that Sonny was right, he followed the other men into the limo.

“Did she say anything else?” Sonny asked, as the car pulled out of the garage and started the five minute ride to the docks and Kelly’s.

“No.” Jason squeezed his eyes shut and searched inside for the focus he was going to need to see this through. “She sounded shaken up.”

“Jase…” Sonny hesitated. “I’m sure it’s all right. We didn’t know what the threat level was. Now we know and can take precautions.”

“I promised to protect her,” Jason murmured. “How is letting her almost be grabbed protecting her?”

Kelly’s: Dining Room

By the time Jason and Sonny arrived at Kelly’s, the cleanup crew had arrived. Sonny swore when he saw the broken tables and chairs outside. He was going to have to get them replaced before morning or Bobbie was going to know exactly what happened here.

Cody and Johnny were inside, standing by the table where Francis was examining Elizabeth’s hands. Jason ignored everyone and went for her, crouching in front of her. “Are you okay? What happened?”

“We were leaving,” Elizabeth said. She straightened and took a deep breath. “I turned to lock the door and I’m not really sure how it happened—”

“One guy grabbed me from behind,” Cody growled. “I swept the parking lot and the courtyard before I brought her into the open, Jason, I swear, but they must have been waiting somewhere—” When Sonny just gestured for him to get on with the events and skip the excuses, Cody huffed. “The guy got me from behind and I was struggling to get rid of him, but the other one grabbed Eliz—Miss Webber.”

“I remembered my self-defense lessons,” Elizabeth said softly. She looked at Jason and tried to smile. “I threw my weight against him to get him off balance, hoping he’d stumble into the tables. When we fell, I started to run, but I knew I wouldn’t be able to get the door unlocked in time and I wasn’t sure I could get past him to the parking lot. And you…last summer, you told me not go for the head because I’m too short, so I kicked him in the knees.”

“And then you ran,” Jason prompted, but scowled as she looked away. “Elizabeth, I told you that you need to get him on the ground and run—”

“I grabbed a chair and swung it at him,” she said softly. “And I kept hitting him with pieces of the chair until he was passed out and Cody stopped me.”

Jason closed his eyes, torn between relief that she’d had the presence of mind to not only fight her captor but use his advice and anger that she hadn’t acted with a sense of self-preservation. “Elizabeth—”

“I’m sorry. I should have run, I know…b-but I was afraid I might not get away or that Cody would be hurt a-and I d-didn’t know if I could get inside—”

“Jase…” Sonny touched his shoulder. “We gotta clear out of here.”

“Right.” He took Elizabeth’s hands in his own, and flinched at the nicks and cuts from the chair she’d wielded. “We have a doctor coming to the penthouse. Are you okay? Do you feel any cramping?”

“Just sore.” He stood and drew her to her feet, wrapping an arm around her shoulders.

Sonny looked at Cody. “All right, where are the sons of bitches?”

“I locked them in the pantry closet until Johnny got here with the cuffs. They’re in the van on their way to the warehouse,” Cody answered. “I’m sorry, Jason. Miss Webber. This is my fault—”

“No,” Jason said, roughly. “No. I asked you to protect Elizabeth a-and you did that. It’s my fault. I should have put more men on the building.” He looked at Sonny. “I know I should go to the warehouse and wait for them to wake up, but—”

“No, no, you’re right.” Sonny shook his head. “I’ll go with Cody and Johnny to the warehouse. Max,” he looked at his bodyguard. “Give Marco a call. He’s supposed to be at Elizabeth’s studio waiting for the switch off. You go back to the penthouse with Jason and Elizabeth, and tell Marco to go on the door there. Rocco will stay on my door and you make sure the rest of the building is secure.”

“All right.” Jason steered Elizabeth toward the front doors and then to the waiting limo.

After they were gone, Sonny turned and looked at Cody. “Tell me, how close did they come to getting her out of here?”

Cody closed his eyes in disgust. “Too goddamn close, Boss. If she hadn’t known how to take him down, he could have had her out of here before I got loose. Lucky for us, Miss Webber’s a fighter. She knocked the bastard out cold.” He rubbed his forehead. “I hate that she had to do that—”

“Better than the alternative.” Sonny heaved a sigh. “All right. Get in a call in to replace the furniture in the courtyard.” He looked to Johnny. “Make sure this place looks like it did before this incident.” He looked at Cody. “You ready to go get some answers?”

“Looking forward to it.”

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

Jason opened the door and stepped to the side to allow Elizabeth to enter. She looked like she was in one piece, but he didn’t know if the fall to the ground had injured her. “Our doctor will be here soon to check on you. Are you sure you don’t feel any cramping or—”

“I don’t.” Elizabeth turned to him and bit her lip. “Are you mad I didn’t run? You told me to run, but I just—”

“Hey.” Jason stepped forward and brushed her hair back from her face, letting his thumbs drift down her cheeks until they fanned over her jaw line. “I wasn’t there. I know that you’re standing in front of me and not missing, so at the end of the day, I don’t care.”

“I just…” Elizabeth leaned forward until her head rested against his chest. “I just kept thinking that I couldn’t let them take me, because they’d take me to Ric and my baby would be in danger. I had to protect her, Jason. I couldn’t let him near her.”

“I know. Instinct takes over in moments like that.” He drew her over to the sofa where they sat down and he examined her hands. “I’m just…I’m sorry you had to go through this. I promised you I’d keep you safe—”

“What did you just say to me five seconds ago?” she cut in with a wan smile. “I’m sitting here. I’m not missing. So I don’t care. Jason, if Ric had sent two men to grab me, and Cody hadn’t been there, I’d be gone. I just…I got lucky we were in the courtyard and I know it like the back of my hand. If we hadn’t been so close to the tables, I’m not sure it would have worked.”

“You’re right.” He couldn’t let go of her hands, couldn’t stop looking at her, as if to reassure himself that she’d come through this experience unscathed. If Ric had succeeded tonight, they may never have found her. He might never have seen her again. “We got lucky.”

There was a knock on the door. When Jason opened it, Marco nodded. “I just wanted to let you know I’m here, on duty for the night and that Harry’s here for Miss Webber.” Marco edged around Jason just slightly, as if trying to look inside the room. “Is she all right?”

“Marco?” Elizabeth leaned forward as Jason stepped to the side to allow their doctor through. “I’m glad you’re here. And I’m fine.”

“We’ll let the doctor be the judge of that,” Jason told her. He looked back at Marco. “Thanks. Let Sonny and whoever he brings to the door get through, but no one else. Elizabeth needs rest.”

“Understood.” Jason closed the door and turned to see Harry Lowenstein taking Elizabeth’s blood pressure.

“So how far along are you, Miss Webber?” Harry asked. “You said you’re not feeling any cramps?”

“I’m fourteen weeks,” Elizabeth said, casting an uneasy glance at Jason. “And so far, I’m not. That’s good, right?”

“Well, based on the details Max gave me over the phone, it should be. You said you fell backwards but got up right away? Did you fall on your stomach? On anything hard?” Harry asked.

“No.” Elizabeth winced as the pressure increased on her arm. “No. I think I was maybe three feet in the air, but I fell on the man I was trying to get away from. After that I just kicked him and hit him with a chair. I never hit the ground again.”

“Hmmm…” Harry hesitated. “Your blood pressure’s pretty high, Miss Webber.”

“Well, that’s not news,” Elizabeth sighed. “It’s been high at my last two appointments. Dr. Lee said if I came in again that way, she’d prescribe bed rest to prevent hypertension.”

“Well, she’d be right.” Harry looked at Jason. “Other than some bumps and possible bruising, I’d say she’s in pretty good shape, all things considered. I’d recommend getting an ultrasound as soon as possible to be sure, but I’m more concerned about her blood pressure.”

“But after what happened tonight, it should be high,” Elizabeth said. She looked at Jason. “That just makes sense, doesn’t it?”

“It does, but you just told me that it’s been elevated for most of your pregnancy.” Harry started to pack up his instruments. “That’s a bit disconcerting.”

“I’ll make sure she rests,” Jason said. Elizabeth scowled at him. “At least until she can go see Dr. Lee. If it’s just high because of tonight, Elizabeth, then it’ll go down. Your next appointment is in what, a week, two?”

“Two.” Elizabeth leaned back, her face pale. “All right.”

There was a knock, then Marco pushed open the door. “Mr. Corinthos to see you.”

Sonny strode in, Max, Johnny and Cody on his heels. “Hey, Harry. What’s the prognosis?”

“Bed rest.” Harry stood. “At least a week of light bed rest, and then just taking it easy. She’ll see her regular OB by then who will have more specific instructions. Keep an eye on yourself, Miss Webber. If you feel any stomach cramps or pain, get to the hospital. Don’t bother with me.”

Jason watched as Elizabeth clutched her abdomen. “Is it likely?” she asked.

“No, no. Just as a precaution.” He smiled at them, said his goodbyes and headed for the elevator. Marco closed the door behind him.

Elizabeth eyed the men gathered by the door. “Should I go upstairs?”

Jason immediately went back to her side, worried that she might overdo it. “Do you want water or anything?”

“You can stay down here a moment, Elizabeth,” Sonny told her. “It didn’t take more than a few minutes to learn that the men who went after you tonight were Faith Roscoe’s soldiers, which likely means it was Ric. We assumed that, but it was good to get confirmation. Ric is apparently pissed that you left him for Jason.”

Elizabeth flushed, and Jason squeezed her hand, knowing that she hated to perpetuate the lie in front of men who were protecting her. “It’s because he hates me,” he told her. “You know that.”

“Yeah.” Elizabeth looked back at Sonny. “So what now?”

“Doubling your guards,” Sonny responded. “You can’t go back to Kelly’s. It was one thing when we weren’t sure you were in danger, but it’s a nightmare to secure it hour after hour, so you’re going to have to stop working.”

Jason could see the tension in Elizabeth’s shoulders, and he knew she hated the loss of her independence, of her ability to provide for herself. She raised an eyebrow. “And what else?”

“You’ll have to stay here,” Sonny said. “It’s more secure than anywhere else we could house you, and we can control access to it.”

Elizabeth looked at him, and Jason tried to keep his expression neutral. It was difficult enough to keep himself detached from her pregnancy when she lived apart from him. To know that she would be living here again, for an indeterminate length of time, as her body changed and her pregnancy advanced…

Jason finally nodded. “It makes the most sense,” he told her. And only half for the benefit of the men watching, “And I want you close anyway. With the baby…” He rubbed the back of his neck, uncomfortable. “It…works, Elizabeth.”

She bit her lip and then looked back at Sonny. “You’re right. At the end of the day, I should do whatever you guys think will keep my…our child safe.” She flicked her eyes back him, full of nerves. “So…I’ll move in.”

“Good.” Sonny nodded. “Jason, why don’t you get Elizabeth settled upstairs, and then we’ll…” He coughed and shrugged. “Talk.”

Jason stood and helped Elizabeth to her feet. “I’ll be back down in a little while,” he told Sonny as he led her to the stairs.

“Take your time,” Sonny called.

Once they were upstairs, Jason left her in one of the guest rooms while he went for a shirt for her to wear that night. While she changed, he grabbed a bottle of water from the mini-fridge in his makeshift gym and returned to the guest room to find her sitting up in bed, her legs covered by a sheet and his light blue shirt listing to one side, baring one of her shoulders. “Here,” he said gruffly, holding out the water.

“Thanks.” Elizabeth hesitated. “Jason, I know this isn’t an ideal situation—”

“It’s the best solution,” Jason interrupted. He had to get out of this room and not dwell on the fact that she was only wearing his shirt. He sighed and sat on the edge of the bed. “Elizabeth, I told you. Nothing matters to me more than keeping you and the baby safe. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do to make that happen.”

The corner of her lip curved up as she held the plastic water bottle in her hands. “Yeah, I’m getting that, considering you lied to everyone you love and you’re letting me stay with you until this over. I know you hate when I thank you but…” She looked up, her eyes filled with something he couldn’t quite define. “The fact that I can look forward to raising my child with any sense of…safety and freedom from my horrible choices…it’s because of you. So, thank you.”

He nodded, because he didn’t know what else to say. “I should…I should get back downstairs. If you need anything—food or…anything, just let me know.”

“Okay.”

Jason left the room, and headed down the stairs. Johnny, Max and Cody had left, leaving Sonny seated in the armchair adjacent to his sofa. “So what do we know?”

“Not much more than I came in with,” Sonny sighed. “The men are pissed. Cody was ready to hand me his gun and tell me to do away with him. He’s sick over this.”

“I-I don’t blame him for this happening.” Jason sat on the sofa. “You were right, earlier. We didn’t even know if there’d be a threat to Elizabeth, if Ric hated me enough to come after me when his life was at stake.” He hesitated. “Do we know why they came for Elizabeth? Does Ric believe the child is his?”

“They weren’t forthcoming,” Sonny replied. “But the men assume it’s due to Ric’s hatred of the situation, of you. I’ve let it circulate that my mother picked me over him, and that now he thinks I picked you over him as my brother, and Elizabeth picking you is just another stack in his crazy pile of shit. They buy it.”

“Good.” Jason clasped his hands together. “We don’t know where they were taking her?”

“To a van that was a long gone by the time we went looking for it.” Sonny leaned his head back, looking weary. “She all right? I know she must have been scared.”

“She’s holding together.” Jason shook his head. “After last summer, I never wanted her to go through that again, to feel that fear.”

“The one whose head she bashed?” Sonny said. “She knocked him out good. Would have had a nasty concussion if we’d let him live long enough. Word’s gonna spread to anyone else Faith Roscoe might send. If you mess with Elizabeth Webber, your life isn’t worth much.” He sat up. “You taught her well, Jase. She went for the kneecaps, and kept herself safe. I hate that she went through it, but she did and she’s going to be all right.”

“Sonny…I—I know you wouldn’t give the order, but…” Jason paused. “If I see Ric, I’m not gonna care he’s your brother.”

“After this?” Sonny grimaced and shook his head. “I don’t care much either. You see him, you do what you gotta do. He signed his death warrant the moment he came after Elizabeth. I was willing to keep her safe, look for him so I could deliver him to the Families, but after tonight? I hope I can personally remove that psychotic son of a bitch from her life. No one is going to get that close to her again, Jason.” He pressed a hand to his heart. “And not because that’s my niece or nephew she’s carrying, but because I can’t see her go through it again.”

“Good.” Jason got to his feet. “Then you go to tell the Families to get off their asses, stop pretending to help, and hunt this son of a bitch down. We can only do so much if they’re not fully cooperating. Tell them to get the word out to anyone who matters, Ric Lansing went after my family. He’s a dead man walking.”

More than angry words I hate this silence
It’s getting so loud
Well I want to scream
But bitterness has silenced these emotions
It’s getting hard to breathe
– Hold Me, Savage Garden

Saturday, June 7, 2003

Corinthos Penthouse: Living Room

If Carly hadn’t decided to keep her mouth shut and cooperate with this situation because it was simply the right thing to do, the added benefit of confusing the crap out of her husband and best friend might have been reason enough. Not flipping out when Jason broke Courtney’s heart, or screaming like a shrew at Elizabeth at every opportunity, pretending not to know the truth…Carly was enjoying this far more than she ought to have.

But that had been before. When Jason had been lying to make Ric leave town thinking he had nothing to stay for, not when this lie was keeping Elizabeth and her child alive. Now, as Sonny explained to Carly that Jason had decided he needed to support Elizabeth more so they were moving in together, she knew something terrible had happened.

It was time to stop playing around.

Carly stood in front of the fireplace, her hand braced on the small of her back. “Does Ric know the truth, Sonny? Do we know how much danger Elizabeth is in?”

Sonny blinked at her, and she wanted to roll her eyes. “Yes, yes, I knew all along. I’m not an idiot. I also know I’m the last person Jason would have trusted with this, considering my track record with trying to help him and then making everything worse.” She pressed her lips together. “Plus, I’m supposed to be Courtney’s best friend, so if he couldn’t trust prissy Robin Scorpio to protect the truth about Michael when she loved Jason, why should he expect me to do the same when I don’t even like Elizabeth much? So, let’s not focus on the reasons I wasn’t told outright because I’m not angry, Sonny.”

“I…” Sonny hesitated. “We thought you might know, you hinted at it, but we weren’t sure. Carly—”

“Paternity secrets work better when no one knows them. I know Jason tried to lie to you, but you never bought it either, and if this were Jason’s child, he’d be doing a better damn job of protecting Elizabeth. She would have been moved into the penthouse weeks ago, but instead, Jason let her out into the world, working and living in buildings that are far from secure,” Carly said. “He didn’t go to her doctor’s appointments and he couldn’t be bothered to fill out a simple medical form to keep the Quartermaines from sniffing around, wondering why the histories didn’t match. Sonny, I don’t know about the search for Ric, but I’m out there, and this story is falling apart.”

“It’s not the story we’re worried about so much right now.” Sonny rubbed his face. “He’s working with Faith Roscoe, and she sent two men to grab Elizabeth last night after she closed. One guy jumped Cody, and if Elizabeth hadn’t had the presence of mind to send her attacker crashing into the courtyard tables, she’d be gone right now. So I’m even less concerned with the lie at the moment.”

“We need to be concerned about it,” Carly said briskly. “I know you don’t want me to know about business, but I think a woman who’s ignorant in this world, who ignores details because it’s better to have plausible deniability is an idiot. You told the Families to go after Ric because he’s threatening Jason’s family. If they found out you lied, we’d have worse problems on our hands than Ric and Faith.”

The hands slid from Sonny’s face and he looked at her, apparently for the first time. “I told you, Sonny. I accept your life. So we keep Elizabeth safe from that psychotic twisted piece of shit, but we have to make sure this lie stays credible.”

Looking exhausted, Sonny lowered himself into the armchair in front of her. “Sometimes, Carly, you drive me insane. And then others, you remind me exactly why I married you. You’re a schemer, which means you always have to stay one step ahead of the person you’re manipulating. I should have…I should have thought of it, of what would happen if the Families knew…”

“That’s fine. Most of the time, Sonny, I could give two damns what you’re doing in your business beyond what it means for me and my children. But right now, this is personal. Ric Lansing came after you for personal reasons. He targeted Elizabeth because Jason’s stupid for her, so do not shut me out of this. I can help.”

“Yeah.” Sonny looked at her. “Yeah. So, her guards are doubled, she’s not going back to work, and the doctor told her bed rest because her blood pressure is too high anyway. She’s moving in with Jason because she can be protected better. I cannot think of a single thing to protect her more than that.”

“Me either, and I leave that stuff for you anyway.” Carly sat on the adjacent couch. “Sonny, I’ve spent the last two months thinking about this, trying to understand why Jason would agree to claim Elizabeth’s child to the entire world and then ignore her. Because if I could figure that out, I could figure out a way to tell him to knock it off. I could figure out how to fix any problems he was having, but Sonny…I think I know what the problem is…and I can’t fix it.”

Sonny looked at her, his eyes dark and pained. “I think I know too. He loves her, and he’s afraid she’ll walk out the door again.”

“And take her child with her,” Carly concluded. “And the last thing he wants is to watch another child walk out of his life. He knows the truth, and he knows what could happen when this ends. So I guess…he’s trying to protect himself. So how do we stop him from doing that?”

“I’m not sure we can any more than I think he can stop himself from getting hurt.” Sonny sighed. “Because the longer he tries to be detached, the more Elizabeth is going to think it’s because this baby is Ric’s. And she’ll walk out anyway.”

Her throat burning. “I can’t fix that, Sonny. I can’t take back what I did with Michael, what we did together. I can’t talk to Elizabeth about it, because I know better than to get involved in Jason’s life. I’ll probably mess it up even more. I can’t make Jason trust Elizabeth to stay because I don’t know if she will. How do I fix this, Sonny?”

Sonny closed his eyes. “We can’t. Talking to them isn’t going to make it better. They’ll never believe it coming from us. And, going by the last two months…they’re not going to talk to each other long enough to fix it themselves, which is the only way this gets better.”

“If they don’t fix this,” Carly said softly, “And Jason keeps avoiding this pregnancy, the seeds of doubt are going to be there. The Families probably don’t want to help as it is. It won’t take them much to want to turn on you, so you at least…have to tell Jason that.”

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

Jason came down the stairs, and stopped in front of the sofa where he had carried her that morning. Apparently, Jason Morgan took light bed rest very seriously. No stairs for her. No further than the bathroom or kitchen.

“I swear I haven’t moved,” Elizabeth said, forcing a smile and holding up her hands. “Not even a single inch.”

“I know.” Jason sat in the armchair adjacent to her, his legs spread out and his hands clasped between them. “I…we should talk…about how this is going to work. I—I know you stayed here before, but things…things are…” He exhaled. “Well, it’s not the same and—”

He looked so uncomfortable, so pained and suddenly, she just couldn’t do it anymore. She drew her knees up to her chest and rested her chin on top, looking at him. “Jason, do you remember the night we met at Jake’s?”

Jason broke off his protracted and distressed speech to look at her, bewildered. “Yeah. Why?”

“From the moment I met you,” Elizabeth began, “you were so different from everyone else. You made me feel comfortable in my own skin because you just…let me ramble and then you would just talk to me. And we were so good at that, Jason. Even when things were difficult between us. When you pushed me away that first time, after the bomb in my studio, you listened to my argument and you acknowledged it. I knew you left Port Charles for your own reasons, and not just because geographical distance kept me safer. And every time you came back…it was like you’d never left.” She smiled at him, remembering the way she’d run to him that first time, on the docks.

“I…remember.” And he must have thought of those times as fondly as she did, because he was smiling now.

“I know…things started to get complicated between us that second time you were home, but, still, you were always honest with me.” She tucked her hair behind her ears. “Even when I wasn’t honest with myself. I always felt like you weren’t even angry with me, though you should have been. You were annoyed and irritated that I was lying to myself. I miss that, Jason. I really do. I miss having one person in my life that I could be completely honest with.”

“I miss…I miss it, too,” he admitted. And she watched as his shoulders slackened, as if the words themselves lifted weight and tension. “Elizabeth, I know things haven’t been right between us for months.”

“I know. I know I messed everything up,” she sighed. She stared down at her toes, wiggling them. “I thought…when you came home last year, that this…this was finally going to our chance. We were finally going to get our timing right. I wasn’t mourning Lucky or trying to make things work with him, and you weren’t…” She looked up and wrinkled her nose with a wry smile. “I don’t know, I never knew why you didn’t think it was the right time, but I could tell…even back in the studio that December, that you felt the same way I did.”

He looked away, but his mouth had curved into a slight smile and his eyes were soft. “I thought I did a good job at hiding it. You were…just getting past Lucky, and I know…we don’t have a huge age difference between us, but—”

“But it was a lot at the time,” Elizabeth acknowledged, and just sitting here, honestly discussing the fact they’d been attracted to one another even then made her feel as though they really could have this conversation. “So, I guess I understand it. And though sometimes I wished you had pressured me more two years ago, when I was clearly torn because I didn’t know how to explain to Lucky, the world, myself that I wasn’t in love with him anymore, that I wasn’t same the girl who’d buried him…I was glad that I eventually figured it out for myself. When Lucky slept with Sarah, I wasn’t angry because I was jealous. I was angry because they lied to me.” She sighed, remembering the pain and the hurt and thinking it all seemed so small now. “Because I had asked them and asked them, and they had denied it. But you were back, so it didn’t…hurt for long.”

“I hated to see you so upset,” Jason said. He stood and joined her on the couch. “But I…I was glad you were finally going to be away from Lucky.” He hesitated. “And I thought it going to be our chance, too.” His eyes darkened and he looked away. “But you were kidnapped.”

“I never…” Elizabeth crawled forward slightly, tucking her knees underneath her. “I never blamed you, Jason. Not once. In all those hours I was scared…I knew you were going to come for me. Somehow. I knew it.”

“Not fast enough,” Jason shook his head. “I wasted time because I thought it was about ELQ and Edward and AJ couldn’t help me—” He hesitated.

Elizabeth drew back and just blinked at him. “Edward…AJ?” she repeated. “You…You went to them?”

“I asked Taggart, too,” Jason admitted. “Because he always cared about you, and he…they all tried, but I wasted time going to dinner at the Quartermaine’s because it was the only way Edward would help—”

Her heart was going to leap out of her chest. “Jason, you went to dinner at the Quartermaines and you asked Taggart.” Was this reality? Was she dreaming this? “Why…”

“I would have done anything,” he said, fiercely. “Anything to bring you home safely. I would have asked anyone…” He turned on the sofa and surprised her by feathering the back of his hand down her cheek and tucking a piece of hair behind her ear. “Elizabeth, if I hadn’t found you…”

She was hallucinating. Pregnancy could create delusions, because he was looking at her the way he always had. “But you did find me,” she said softly. “Like I knew you would.” Elizabeth took a deep breath. “But I know…that I messed everything up after that. Like I always do. I know…I ruined things long before I said that you did.”

Jason frowned. “You didn’t…Elizabeth—”

“Don’t…we’re being honest now, aren’t we?” Elizabeth said, her breath hitching, because here was the difficult part. If they were ever going to get that friendship back, they had to discuss how she’d torched everything they’d had. “The night of the storm, when you got a phone call and you had to go. I should have told you…I should have told you how terrified I was to be alone right then. I know you had something important to do, so maybe you couldn’t have done anything, but I was so scared….” She closed her eyes when he brushed a tear away. “And then the lights went out, and I was in the stairwell, and I was back in that moment. I was praying that you’d find me…” Her eyes flew open. “I’m not…I’m not blaming you for Zander. I—I’m not because I made…well, up until this last spring, it was the worst mistake I’d ever made in my entire life.”

“Elizabeth—”

“But I was so terrified,” she rushed to explain. “I wanted…to feel something. And Zander kissed me, so I just…I let him. And I…” She shook her head. “I don’t know what I was thinking. I still can’t really explain it to myself. I don’t know if I would have told you if you hadn’t…seen…or if you hadn’t been there the next day…I like to think I would have been honest, but I felt so dirty and disgusting…” The tears were falling in earnest now, burning hot trails down her cheeks. “And you…you looked right through me. I thought…”

“Elizabeth, you and I…” He cradled her head in his hands, using his thumbs to brush away her tears. “We hadn’t said anything to each other—”

“Does that change anything?” Elizabeth asked. “Does the fact you and I hadn’t sat down and made promises change what we were? What we could have been? I thought I had lost my chance with you, so I clung to Zander so I wouldn’t be alone, but I just…I couldn’t do it. I didn’t care about him that way. I didn’t…” She hesitated. “But that day I was shot, and you looked at me that way…” The way he was looking at her now. God, if she could paint that look, she could keep it forever. “I thought maybe…maybe you didn’t hate me anymore, but you still didn’t want me. You kept telling me it was too dangerous, but I wish…you should have been honest with me.” She licked her lips. “I know I hurt you, but you wouldn’t just tell me that it was over, and I hated you for months for making me feel like I still mattered…”

“You mattered,” Jason said. “You…you always mattered. You still…” He frowned. “I was honest with you, Elizabeth. After you were…grazed by that bullet, I didn’t want you to be hurt because of me. Not again. It was too dangerous—”

“No, no,” Elizabeth pulled back, her breath hitching as sobs slipped out. “No, we’re supposed to be honest, Jason. You told me it was too dangerous and I wanted to meet in secret, but you said it wouldn’t work, but you…” She forced the words out. “You did all of that with Courtney, a—and you were with her during the trial even though you could have gone to jail, so I know you were lying to me. Because you didn’t want tell me how I ruined everything, how I was always ruining things, so you just…you told me that so I’d go away.”

“No, I didn’t.” Jason reached for her, but she shook her head again.

“No, because it wasn’t too dangerous to Courtney, so I don’t…I don’t understand it. You had to be lying, because you were with her all the time, you even walked her home before you came back to the penthouse the night I found out about Sonny. You went to the hospital to see Alexis, you went to the police station, you went to Courtney’s….and I kept sitting on the couch, waiting for you to call, to explain, but it was hours and hours and you let me sit there, thinking about how stupid I was, and how—” She closed her eyes, and forced herself to calm down. It did no good to get so upset. It was over…things had changed. “I ruined everything, Jason, and I know that, but you should have told me you had feelings for Courtney by then. You never should have sat on this sofa and promised me we could try.”

She turned away, and maybe would have stood to leave the room, but Jason gently took her elbow and forced her to look at him. “Elizabeth, I am not lying to you,” he said. “I didn’t lie then, either. Listen to me…” He took her by the shoulders, and Elizabeth forced herself to look at him. He’d sat there and let her pour her heart out, it was only fair he’d be granted the same courtesy.

“Okay.” She took a deep breath. “Okay.”

“When I said those things to you last summer, when I said it was too dangerous…” He hesitated. “It was. Because even though we didn’t know much about Alcazar at that point, we knew he was out there. He was a threat, and he’d already ordered you to be kidnapped. I don’t know…if maybe I thought after it was over, we could…try again. It didn’t work out that way. Elizabeth, nothing ever happened with Courtney while you were in my life.”

Her eyes flew to his, because how could that be anything but a lie, but he didn’t look like he was lying. He didn’t look as though the words were false. “M-maybe not physically, but—”

“I wanted to tell you about Sonny,” Jason told her. “But he…he gets these moods, and he snaps, and you can’t get through to him. He was questioning me a lot, especially after you were kidnapped. So when he told me you couldn’t know, I didn’t feel like I could argue, and if I went against him to tell you anyway…” He shook his head. “I should have. I should have handled everything better. You thought Sonny was dead, and you just…wanted to be there for me, but I could not accept your comfort, your worry because it was a lie, and I was trying so hard not to lie to you. It went on for much longer than I thought it would. And…when it came out the way it did, I knew it was on the news, I knew you knew the truth, so I delayed coming back here. Because I didn’t want to see how much I hurt you.”

She licked her lips, because all of that made so much sense. “Why…why didn’t you say that when you came in?” she asked. “If you…if you’d said that…”

“You told me I ruined everything,” Jason reminded her. “And you had that look in your eyes. You were already packed and ready to go, and you…” He swallowed. “You told me I was Sonny’s enforcer, that’s all I was—”

“Because that’s all you were acting like,” Elizabeth cut in. “It was like I wasn’t there, like I hadn’t been kidnapped or shot at, like I wasn’t living in this penthouse for my protection. After all those months of being lied to by Lucky about being in love with me, and then not being attracted to Sarah, I just…I couldn’t do it again. I couldn’t be ignored, placated, patronized. You told me it was none of my business.” She pressed a hand to her chest, her heart still breaking from those words. “Like I don’t get your life. I found you, bleeding in the snow and hauled you home where I proceeded to let everyone think you and I were lovers so the police wouldn’t suspect.” She laughed ruefully. “I’m not sure people don’t still assume that, now that I think about it. Because I never told anyone any differently. I lied to everyone in my life to hide you in my studio two years ago, and every time Sonny asked me to leave my own home, I walked out without another word.”

“I—I know all of that,” Jason said, his voice hoarse. “And you’re right. I can’t argue with any of that. Elizabeth, I can’t go back and make it different—”

“I know. That’s—that’s not why I wanted to talk about this.” She exhaled slowly and closed her eyes. “Jason, I want us to be honest with each other, so we can move forward and handle this situation. We have all this baggage between us, and I don’t…” Frustrated, her voice breaking, “I don’t want to look at you and regret not having you in my life anymore. I know I ruined any chance for us ever to be together, if not then, then certainly now, but to not even have you as a friend…” She hesitated. “I don’t know if it even bothered you that we weren’t friends anymore, but—”

“Every time I saw you,” Jason interrupted. “I thought about just talking to you, trying to…get back to that place, but I never could. I didn’t know how to start, how to handle it if…” He trailed off.

“If what?”

“If you didn’t want me around.” Jason exhaled slowly. “Because I knew you were hurt about Brenda, after that night at Luke’s. I should have tried harder to make you understand what had happened, but I kept…I kept leaving it up to you, because I was afraid if I told you what I wanted…you wouldn’t want the same thing, and I didn’t…I didn’t want to face that.”

“So, that night at Luke’s…” Elizabeth said slowly, “if I had just told you that we still had a chance…you would have still wanted one?” She frowned, and shook her head. “No, no, I don’t believe that. Because something was going on with Courtney by that point, I know. She’s told me that you guys…that it started while you were guarding her, and that you were guarding her while I was still living here—”

“No,” Jason said, firmly and with a slight irritation. “I don’t…maybe Courtney was having feelings, I’m not sure. I—I never asked. But I felt nothing for her when I was with you. I was thinking about you, even when I should have been concentrating on work, but—”

“I don’t…I don’t understand.” This didn’t work, this didn’t line up. “Courtney moved to that loft in December. You still wanted a chance with me at Thanksgiving, Jason, and you’re telling me two weeks later you rented that loft for her, for the two of you—”

“You tell me you can’t explain what happened with Zander?” Jason said. “Well, I know exactly what you mean because I don’t…Courtney was just there, and I…you wouldn’t talk to me.” He rubbed his forehead.

She just stared at him. How could she have been so wrong? She couldn’t have been. “Jason, I’m not trying to trap you or make you feel bad. I know…I know that it’s possible to be with someone you care about and develop feelings for someone else. I may not have loved Lucky the way I once had, but I still cared about him, but…you were there, too and I knew how I felt about you. So…I get it. I’m not asking you to make me feel better, but I know things with Courtney started earlier than that, okay? Courtney…and E-Emily have both told me over and over again—”

“Elizabeth, I don’t care what anyone else—” He stopped and frowned. “Courtney and Emily have told you what exactly? I don’t…I haven’t talked to my sister about what happened between us. I wouldn’t.”

“Maybe we should…just stop here—” Elizabeth started to unfold her legs, but he reached out and held her shoulders still. “Jason—”

“If the reason you’re so upset, that you think I lied to you about it being too dangerous, is because people are telling you things, I think I should know what they are,” he told her. “Until I know what you’re thinking, I can’t respond to it. You wanted to be honest, well I’m trying.”

“It’s…” Hoisted on my own petard, she thought bitterly. “Fine. Emily said…and I don’t know if she said this because you’d said anything or she just …knows you pretty well, but she said that if you had been that interested in me, it would been different, because…if you wanted to be with me, you would be.” Under his scrutinizing gaze, she lowered her eyes. “And I know that’s true. And C-Courtney told me I made up my relationship with you in my head…which made sense since you kept…you wouldn’t tell me how you felt. You…kept walking away, and…” She couldn’t keep going on, explaining. “Jason—”

The hand on her shoulder slide up her neck to cup the back of her neck and then she felt him drawing her forward. This was like an out of body of experience—she had the sensation of floating overhead and watching Jason kiss her.

God, she never thought this would happen to her again. She’d thought, for her mistakes, that two incredible moments with his arms around her and his lips hers would be it, but maybe…

Maybe it would be at least three, so she was going to make the most of it. She slid her hands in his hair, and rose up on her knees. His arms slid down her torso, wrapping around her back, and pressing her against him. If she could stay like this forever, if he never stopped kissing her…

The knock on the door roused her faintly, but she decided to ignore it, because damn it, this was her chance.

“Miss Webber?” Francis called. “Jason?”

Jason drew back, and she actually whimpered at the loss. He rested his forehead against hers. “They…” He cleared his throat. “They were packing up your studio and bringing things over.”

“Oh…” Elizabeth blinked, and drew back, her hand sliding from his neck down to his shoulder. “Oh. Okay.”

“Give us a second, Francis,” Jason called, not looking away. “There has never been a single moment since the day I met you that you didn’t matter to me. Tell me, at least, you believe me about that.”

“I do,” she murmured. Feeling brave, she leaned forward and kissed him briefly. “I do believe that.”

Port Charles Hotel: Grille

Carly glanced over the top of the menu to her sister-in-law and her friend. For two months, she had sat across from her and pretended she believed Jason had cheated on her, impregnated his ex-girlfriend, but she had never acknowledged the lie to her husband, so it had felt…not quite like a game, but not as serious as it did right now.

She felt guilty to be keeping the secret, but after what Elizabeth had gone through the night before, she understood better than ever why this secret had to be contained. As much as Carly enjoyed Courtney’s companionship, she simply couldn’t see trusting her.

She set the menu aside and sighed. “Courtney, there’s something I need to tell you and I wanted you to hear it from me.”

The other blonde’s fingers tightened on the menu, bending and wrinkling the paper. “They’re together, aren’t they?” Courtney asked, her voice tight.

“No…I…” Carly sat back. “Well, I don’t really know about that. Maybe.” She had to find her inner Carly Roberts, the woman who had sauntered into Port Charles and lied every time her mouth opened. “It’s…Elizabeth is moving into the penthouse.”

Courtney straightened and she narrowed her eyes. “And you’re telling me that doesn’t mean they’re together? I don’t believe you, Carly. Don’t lie to spare my feelings. I need to be prepared for this—”

“All I know is that Elizabeth has been required to go on bed rest,” Carly said, holding up her hands in protest. “She saw her doctor and her blood pressure has been too high for weeks. She’s leaving Kelly’s, and she’s staying with Jason, at least until her health has cleared up.”

“She won’t be back at work.” Some of the tension bled from her sister-in-law’s shoulders. “So I won’t…I won’t see her in there anymore. We don’t have to work together.”

“No, so at least there’s that.” Carly hesitated. “But Courtney, you might want to start preparing yourself because…they’re having a child together. That…might lead…it might not be long before you hear they are together again.”

“No, no…” Courtney shook her head. “The last time she lived there, he was never there. Maybe…” She squared her shoulders. “He didn’t like living with her before, so maybe he’ll remember why he left her the first time.”

“The first time?” Carly frowned. “Courtney, Sonny was faking his death, and Jason was running around trying to track down Alcazar and protect Brenda. He was with you very rarely. I know…I know you think what you guys had started then, but I just…I just don’t think so—”

“You weren’t there,” Courtney shot back, a smug smile on her face. “Jason and I kissed for the first time two weeks after she walked out on him, so obviously she didn’t mean that much.”

“Let’s…let’s just order.” Carly signaled for the waiter. She hadn’t realized how quickly Jason had started looking at Courtney that way, and while that information told Courtney that Jason hadn’t cared for Elizabeth all that much…Carly knew her friend better than that. Jason had a habit of going through a bad time and turning to something else to drown it out. He’d gone back to Jake’s after Michael was gone and Robin had betrayed him, staying there most nights and getting into bar fights and drinking a bit too much.

And she wondered if Courtney had been anyone other than Sonny’s sister…if she would have stayed a rebound relationship.

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

Cody pushed the door open. “Miss Webber, Nadine Crowell is here.”

Elizabeth sat up on the sofa, setting her book on the coffee table and smiled at her friend. “Hey. I was hoping you’d stop by when I left you the message.”

“Seriously?” Nadine crossed the room and sat on the end of the couch. “I could not wait for my shift to end before I could get over here.” She hesitated and glanced around. “Um, is anyone else here?”

“No, Jason had to go to the warehouse.” Elizabeth’s cheeks flushed and she looked down. After Francis had interrupted them earlier, Jason had busied himself directing the guards who had packed her studio to put her art supplies in one of the guest rooms and then her suitcases and personal belongings in her room. After that, Sonny had called for him and there’d been no opportunity to continue their conversation.

“Oh, good.” Nadine grinned. “So, you’re moving in with your babydaddy. This is fantastic, right? And you thought he was regretting even being involved—”

“Well, it’s not exactly that simple.” Elizabeth sat cross-legged next to her. “Without going into details because I really can’t…there was an incident last night, so Jason had someone take my blood pressure.” She sighed. “And it was pretty high. He suggested light bed rest until I go see Kelly at the end of the month.”

“I won’t ask for any details.” Nadine held up her hands. “You look okay, so that’s enough for me.” She hesitated. “So you’re staying with Jason for a few weeks?”

“No.” Elizabeth dipped her head back and smiled lightly. “It’s for the foreseeable future. He’s worried about…danger. I’m leaving my job as well.”

“Well, hell…” Nadine blinked. “Things changed pretty damn quick.” She chewed her bottom lip. “Can you… are you going to be able to stay here? I know…we haven’t talked about your ex in any detail, but I can tell you’re still crazy about him and he’s been so MIA during this—”

“We’re…” Elizabeth hesitated, wishing she could really confide in Nadine. “We’re talking. Being honest for the first time…I don’t know…maybe ever. I don’t know if it means anything, or if it could go anywhere, but before we tried to be more, he was my best friend and if we walk out of this situation with just that intact, it’ll be worth it.”

“Well, being friends is good,” Nadine said, but her eyes were skeptical. “Raising a kid together always works better when you’re friends.” She paused. “But Elizabeth, I hope that while you guys are being honest about each other, you’re being honest about the baby.”

“Maybe the next time we talk,” Elizabeth said, but she was so hesitant to bring up the baby. If they had a chance to make things work again, of course the baby would be a factor but…wasn’t it implied? That if they were going to try to build something, her child would have to be part of the equation?

But maybe they weren’t. Maybe that’s not what the kiss had meant. After all, the last time he’d kissed her senseless, he’d walked away for days.

No. No, she wasn’t going to do keep doing this. She looked at Nadine. “It’s really complicated…this situation, I mean, but you’re right. It’s not enough that we’re honest about what went wrong before. We need to be honest about what comes next.”

Nadine smiled, but the gesture didn’t reach her eyes. “But you don’t think you will be.”

“It’s easy to be honest about what’s already happened,” Elizabeth replied, “Because those things are over, and all that’s left is to explain what happened. But…to talk about tomorrow, and the day after…that’s making plans.” She looked away, towards the pool table, towards the window where they’d once stood in front of and talked about yachts. “We’ve never been good at that. We talk about things we might do in the far future, months away, but never about tomorrow.” She looked back at Nadine. “Which I guess really says it all, doesn’t it? We never talk about tomorrow, which is probably why when it stops being today, we screw it up so much.”

I’m falling apart, I’m barely breathing
With a broken heart that’s still beating
In the pain, there is healing
In your name I find meaning
So I’m holdin’ on, I’m holdin’ on, I’m holdin’ on
I’m barely holdin’ on to you
– Broken, Lifehouse

Tuesday, June 24, 2003

General Hospital: Kelly Lee’s Office

She couldn’t believe Jason was actually sitting in this office with her, prepared to sit through her doctor’s appointment and watch an ultrasound that would reveal whether Elizabeth was having a boy or a girl, and he was going to do that knowing full well Kelly and Nadine thought he was the father.

What a difference two weeks could make.

They had never really returned to the conversation Francis had interrupted her first day in the penthouse, but Elizabeth didn’t mind. Though they had not discussed their relationship any further than the days after their disastrous meeting at Luke’s, the tension and discomfort had all but vanished. She’d spent the majority of her first two weeks in the penthouse sitting on the couch, reading, sketching or watching mindless daytime television while Jason ferried her from living room to bedroom, and arranged for most of her meals.

They sat in silence much of time, while she read magazines or sketched and he worked on files or read travel books. There had been no recurrence of the interrupted kiss either, but…sometimes she caught him looking at her out of the corner of her eye, and his eyes had that soft, tender look she’d become so accustomed to during the years of their friendship.

She had not taken Nadine’s advice and asked him about tomorrow or spoken about the baby. Somehow, Elizabeth innately understood that these were not subjects that would preserve the peaceful status quo, and having just re-established the old comfort level…she did not want to disturb it.

Which would probably happen after today. She’d told him about her appointment last week, he’d promised to clear his schedule because he needed to start taking a more active interest. But this morning, the tension was back in his shoulders and the longer they sat in this office, her already on the examining table and him in the chair adjacent, the less comfortable he looked.

“Sonny came by this morning,” she said finally. “While you were at the warehouse.”

“Did he need me?” Jason frowned. “I told him I was—”

“No, no, he came to check on me.” Elizabeth clasped her hand over her abdomen. “I think he was inspecting the cabinets for contraband.” Her lips curved. “He thinks I’m Carly’s cookie dealer.”

Jason laughed softly and leaned back, his shoulders relaxing slightly. “Yeah, he’s not sure how she keeps getting them past the door, but I think Bobbie’s giving packages to Michael.”

“It’s almost adorable,” Elizabeth said, “but then he started complaining about my cookie stash and I had to kick him out.” She tossed him an unapologetic smile. “Sorry about that.”

“No, he gets…very…” Jason paused, as if searching for the right word. “Cranky about nutrition. He wants the baby to be safe and this is the one area he thinks he can have complete control over.”

The door opened then, and Nadine and Kelly came in. “Hey, Elizabeth!” Kelly greeted. She stopped and blinked at Jason. “I see we finally have company.”

Nadine grinned and walked around them to start getting a tray together for Kelly. Elizabeth nervously tucked her hair behind her ears. “Jason, this is Dr. Kelly Lee, and I think you’ve seen Nadine in and out of the penthouse the last few weeks.”

“Hello,” Jason nodded briefly. But he looked away, not knowing what to say next.

“Well…” Kelly smiled brightly. “Let’s get some blood drawn and then we’ll check your blood pressure.” As Nadine prepared Elizabeth’s arm for the needle, Kelly continued. “Have you been feeling better? Your blood pressure was high at the last visit.” She glanced down. “I see they weighed you before you changed came in, and you’re finally gaining back the weight you lost during the first trimester. Very good…”

Elizabeth grimaced at the needle prick for her blood tests and then closed her eyes as Nadine fitted the blood pressure pump to her arm. She just wanted this one to be normal. She’d done nothing but rest and her stress level was better, wasn’t it? “I’ve done what you asked,” she assured Kelly as the pressure built. “Jason barely lets me off the sofa to use the bathroom. I told him what you said at the last appointment about the blood pressure, so we talked about it, and I quit my job.”

“Good.” Kelly nodded. She frowned. “Well, the blood pressure is down but it’s still more elevated than I might like.” She clucked her tongue and made a notation. “But it’s a vast improvement. Sounds like you’ve been on bed rest for a bit, so maybe you could keep doing it…” She looked over at Jason. “Not complete bed rest. She can climb the stairs, move about, but I’d like to see her spend more time sitting than standing.” She tipped her pen at Elizabeth. “And I am relieved you won’t be waiting on the hypocrites of this town and taking their crap anymore, Liz.”

Elizabeth flushed and looked away, wincing when she saw Jason’s frown. “I’ll continue to rest, I promise, Kelly.” She bit her lip. “We’re doing an ultrasound right? You said I could find out the gender.”

“Yup.” Kelly wheeled the machine over and smiled at her. “Nadine tells me your mommy senses are telling you this is a girl.”

“That’s…what I think, anyway.” Elizabeth shivered as Kelly spread the gel over her abdomen. “I’m not…I’m not showing much yet. Is…that okay?” She saw Jason’s eyes focus on her teeny bump—nothing more than a healthy Thanksgiving dinner might accomplish.

“Yep. You’re a tiny woman and first pregnancies take longer to show. Another month, you’ll wish you still had your waistline.” Kelly placed the ultrasound wand on her skin and tapped a few keys. “And…there’s your baby.” She twisted the screen towards them and started to point. “Here’s the head…the legs…and the arms…” She looked at Jason, and Elizabeth was relieved to see he was looking at the screen. “Sometimes fathers have a hard time finding some of the details, so don’t be afraid to tell me it looks like a blob.”

“No…No, I can…” Jason hesitated. “I can see what you pointed to.” He looked at Elizabeth and then back at the screen. “Do you know if Elizabeth is right…about the gender?”

“This is my favorite part of the job,” Kelly remarked with a smile. She pointed. “And this tells me you’re having a beautiful little girl.” She looked at Elizabeth. “Sometimes, a mom just knows, doesn’t she?”

A tear slid down her cheek, and Elizabeth leaned back against the table, her eyes closed. “I don’t know…I don’t know why I thought it was a girl, I just…” She sighed. “I just did.”

“I knew you were right,” Nadine said, reaching out to squeeze her hand. “I am so ridiculously excited about this, you know, baby girl clothes are so much more fun to shop for.” She blinked. “Not that a boy would have sucked, but I mean, the choices are just so much more prolific.” She literally bounced on her feet. “And just think of all the awesome color schemes for the nursery.”

Elizabeth hesitated and looked at Jason, who hadn’t said a word yet. His face was impassive, impossible to read. It had already been two full months since this business had started and Nadine had reminded her that in four and half months, her daughter was going to need a place to sleep.

She couldn’t keep putting off the conversation about tomorrow. She was a mother now, and just concentrating on today was no longer enough.

General Hospital: Waiting Area

Elizabeth saw her grandmother behind the nurse’s station as she and Jason walked in silence from Kelly’s office to the elevator where her guards were waiting. Audrey looked up and saw them, causing Elizabeth to sigh and wonder if the reprieve her grandmother had promised two months earlier was finally at end. Though Audrey had wanted to speak in person, she’d never contacted Elizabeth to arrange it, and Elizabeth certainly hadn’t been in a hurry to do so.

Audrey approached them, flicking a hesitant glance at Jason. “Darling…would you mind if we talked alone? Just a minute.” She looked at Jason more fully. “I can drive her home afterward if she needs it.”

Elizabeth bit her lip and looked at Jason. “You were meeting Emily for lunch anyway.” She touched his arm. “Cody and Dominic will make sure I get home all right. I’ll see you later.”

“Okay.” But Jason kept his eyes on them until the elevator doors open and he stepped inside.

“Let’s…have a seat.” Audrey put a hand on Elizabeth’s shoulder and directed her towards the waiting area and the sofas. “I…I know I haven’t been in touch since I learned about the baby.”

“I’m not surprised.” Elizabeth sat next to her grandmother. “I was actually relieved, because I had a lot of people yelling at me, so one less made my life much easier.”

Audrey nodded and twisted her hands together. “Which is precisely why I did not contact you after saying we would speak in person. I wasn’t sure what I would say or how to react in a way that would not hurt you or make you unhappy.” She paused. “You’ve lived in Port Charles for so long, and yet I don’t believe I’ve seen you stay happy for more than a few brief moments. You were so combative with your sister…” Her grandmother sighed. “And then you were…raped. You were happy with Lucky for a while, but then we thought he was dead.” She reached out to Elizabeth and took her hand. “And then you met Jason. And I don’t…altogether know the details, but you’d come in from seeing him or taking a ride on his bike, and you…”

Elizabeth blinked in surprise as her grandmother’s voice broke. “Gram…”

“Let me say this, Elizabeth. Please.” She squeezed Elizabeth’s hands. “You were lit up from inside. You were so happy, and after all the sorrow and the terrible events, that should have been enough for me, but I was just…so scared for you. I knew you might be in danger, but instead of talking to you rationally, instead of realizing you were an adult, I treated you like a child.” She reached out and tucked Elizabeth’s hair behind her ear. “And pushed you away.”

“I…always understood why people said what they did about Jason, why you, and Lt. Taggart told me I shouldn’t be friends with him,” Elizabeth said hesitantly. “And Gram, I’d be in denial if I said being with him, being friends with him…didn’t come without risks, but…the worst thing that ever happened to me…happened without him. I had my life torn apart because I walked in the park one night. Just being alive can be a risk. No one is ever safe all the time.”

“I know, I know.” Audrey sighed. “And I saw how sad you were when he left town, but I was just relieved. And when Lucky turned out to be alive, I thought you’d be happy again. But even though you told us you were, and even though you smiled like you were…you never lit up again the way you had when you were dating Lucky that first time or…seeing Jason.”

“I wanted to be happy,” Elizabeth told her. “I knew I should be. I had my miracle, and I tried so hard to go back to that dream, to that perfect memory of who Lucky and I were before the fire.” She looked down at her lap. “But he wasn’t the same boy, and I was…”

“In love with someone else,” Audrey concluded, her eyes filled with sorrow. “Which we could all forget when Jason didn’t live in Port Charles. I was so scared when he moved back last summer, because I knew…I knew you were finally going to let yourself be with him…”

“Gram, I—”

“I thought I had gotten my wish when you moved out in the fall, because this time you were fighting with him. You were upset, and you were hurt, but you were angry, too. I thought…” Audrey pursed her lips. “I thought you had seen him for who I thought he was, and you were done with him. And you started dating Ric who seemed so nice…” She paused. “But like with Lucky, you were only pretending. You haven’t been truly happy for more than few weeks, a few days, since Jason left town three years ago.”

A tear slid down Elizabeth’s cheek as she acknowledged the truth in that. “Pathetic, I know, all things considered.”

“So when I found out you were having a child, but it was with Jason, the man I’ve been trying to keep you from all this time…I realized that I could continue to contribute to your unhappiness,” Audrey said, “or I could support you. I wish I could have realized this sooner, because I know how difficult these last few months have been when they should have been the happiest.”

“Are you saying…” Elizabeth’s heart was pounding. She loved Nadine, but the nurse had only been in her life for a month. She’d lost Emily, Lucky and Nikolas were out of town, Jason was still hesitant at times…but Audrey…her grandmother had always been her rock. “Are you saying that you accept my choices?”

“I do,” Audrey nodded. “They are not the ones I would make, but it is not my life to live.” She put her hand under Elizabeth’s chin and tilted her granddaughter’s head up. “I just want you to light up again. I want to see you happy, and if having Jason Morgan in your life, and having a child with him is what it takes, then yes, I will not only accept it. I will support it.” Her lip curved up in a smile. “I’ll worry, but that’s just my job.”

Elizabeth leaned forward and wrapped her grandmother in a tight embrace. “You have no idea how much that means to me or how much I need you.”

“I love you so much, Elizabeth, even when you drive me insane.” Audrey leaned back to kiss Elizabeth’s cheek. “And maybe…because of it. You remind me so much of myself, you know. I was a hell raiser when I came here to annoy my sister, Lucille. I made bad choices, I walked away from people I loved, I drove your grandfather out of his mind before we both realized we were being stupid and avoiding the inevitable.”

“So what you’re saying,” Elizabeth said with a sly smirk, “is that you were me and Aunt Lucille was Sarah.”

“I don’t know if I’d go that far,” Audrey mused. “Lucille never did sleep with my boyfriend.” As if realizing what she’d said, her cheeks flushed and they broke into laughter. When that had subsided, Audrey laced her fingers through Elizabeth’s. “Now, tell me everything I need to know about my brand-new great-grandchild.”

Kelly’s: Courtyard

Jason would never be able to sit in this courtyard, in the hastily replaced chairs that Bobbie had just sighed and accepted…and not remember that Elizabeth had nearly been kidnapped. Since that day, he had not allowed her out of the penthouse without him. If she went to the store, he went with her. Even the double guards didn’t seem to be enough. If he couldn’t see her, then he didn’t know for sure she was safe.

He hated leaving her alone at the hospital even though he knew her afternoon guards, Cody and Dominic, would see her home safely—and he knew Cody would give his life before allowing Elizabeth to be hurt. He’d hoped to bring Elizabeth here for lunch, to show a united front to his sister so that Emily might stop…whatever she was doing to mess with Elizabeth’s head, but he had seen the expression on Audrey Hardy’s face and hoped she was going to offer Elizabeth the support she wanted.

He found his sister flipping through a journal and sipping iced tea. “Hey, Em.”

“Hey, stranger.” Emily stood and hugged her brother. “I’m glad you called.” She flicked her eyes around him. “You said you might bring Elizabeth.”

They sat down and Jason leaned back in his chair. “No…her grandmother wanted to talk to her at the hospital, so she told me to go ahead.” Jason hesitated, but knowing this conversation would be painful, but knowing that honesty was best. Though talking to Elizabeth when she first moved in had been difficult—it had been for the best. All the ugliness was in the open to deal with even if they hadn’t yet.

Sometimes it just good to know where a person stood.

“I know you and Elizabeth haven’t been getting along much,” Jason said after a moment. “I’m sorry if…I’ve contributed to it—”

“You haven’t,” Emily said swiftly. “It’s…It’s been building for months. You know, we used to be close.” She closed her journal and stared down at the cover. “But that came later, after she was…attacked. You didn’t know who she used to be, Jase. When she first moved to town, everyone called her Lizzie—”

“She hates that,” Jason said, but he saw that his sister ignored that.

“And Lizzie Webber was a hardcore bitch,” Emily told him. “If not for her rape and for Lucky, Lizzie would have grown up and made Carly look tame.”

Jason blinked and shook his head. “That’s…Emily, you know that’s not true. I knew Elizabeth a little before. You were friends with her, so I…kept an eye out. She was there the night Nikolas Cassadine was shot at Luke’s club, with her sister. And I remember she stole Ruby Anderson’s invitation to Sonny and Brenda’s wedding.”

“And she also tried to trick Nikolas and Sarah into thinking the other one wanted to have sex, and she framed Sarah for cheating—”

Jason held up a hand, still bewildered by his sister’s tirade. “Elizabeth was a teenager when she did those things. You…weren’t exactly innocent either—”

“You just don’t get it. I thought Elizabeth grew up. I thought she cared about other people, but…” Emily pursed her lips. “But clearly I was wrong. I remember the way she played you and Lucky against each other. If you hadn’t left town, it just would have continued. And then she slept with my boyfriend—”

Jason did not want to talk about Zander Smith or last summer. It was painful enough to watch Elizabeth rip herself apart over the mistake when he hadn’t held it against her nearly as much as she seemed to think. It had been agonizing to see them, to know that she had done that, but he knew it hadn’t meant anything to her, and she was so upset over hurting him that it no longer stung the way it once had.

But Emily hadn’t been here, and he didn’t understand why she was holding something against Elizabeth like this. “Emily, that doesn’t…you were still friends when you came home in March. Why did you suddenly turn on her when she got pregnant?”

“Seriously?” Emily raised an eyebrow. “Courtney’s my friend, too, Jase. Elizabeth told me she was pregnant and decided not to tell me it was your kid, and then freaked out on me when I dropped hints to Ric.”

Jason clenched his jaw, and tried to remember his sister was not in possession of all the information…but if not for Emily, none of this would have happened. “Yeah. I can see why Elizabeth might have kept you out of the loop about it if this is the way you’ve been treating her.”

Emily opened her mouth, “Jason…you don’t understand. She kept…saying things and giving me partial truths and I just…” She shook her head. “I wanted what was best for her. I wanted her to move on. If she had done that, then she wouldn’t have thrown herself at you and got pregnant—”

“First of all,” Jason cut in, leaning forward and pitching his voice low. “I don’t appreciate you telling Elizabeth I didn’t care about her last fall when she was living with me. I don’t appreciate you telling her that I was already seeing Courtney before Elizabeth left. Do you have any idea of the damage you caused?”

Emily leaned back in her chair and pressed her lips together in a mutinous line. “You just don’t understand, Jase. I was trying to protect you—”

“I do not need you to protect me from anyone, least of all Elizabeth. You were not here.” He stood. “I’m not in the mood for lunch. I wanted you to back off Elizabeth because you guys have been through so much. I remember how upset you were when you told me about Tom Baker and the photography studio, how scared she was when she realized who he was. I remember when we thought Lucky was dead, and how the two of you consoled each other. I remember that Elizabeth helped you hide a dead body for months. It might be convenient for you to forget all of that because Elizabeth made a mistake—that she was honest with you about, I might add—but I don’t get it. The stuff you’re holding on to? It’s nonsense.”

“Jase…” Emily got to her feet, wary. “I just… I love you so much—”

“Robin used to tell me that, too,” he said. “But the kind of love she had for me, the kind you clearly have…neither one of you seems to think I can handle my own life. That I can make my own decisions. Elizabeth is pregnant and between you and the rest of this self-righteous town, you had her blood pressure so high she needed bed rest. Do you get that, Emily?” Jason said, raising his voice for the first time. “So that you could feel the satisfaction of protecting me from her, you put her health and the baby at risk.”

“I…” Emily closed her mouth, looking worried. “I didn’t…think about that—”

“No, I didn’t think you did. I don’t give a damn what you or anyone says about me, but I do care that what you say to Elizabeth or about her. So if you love me as much as you say you do, you’ll knock it off.” He stepped towards his sister. “I love you, Emily, but I don’t like you very much right now.”

Morgan Penthouse: Living Room

Elizabeth walked into the penthouse, and smiled over her shoulder at Cody, carrying her bags. They’d left Dominic downstairs in the parking garage because she was planning to be in for the rest of the night, which meant Cody could go on the door until Marco’s shift began. “I can carry those—”

“And have Jason catch me?” Cody snored. “Not on your life, Eliz—” He stopped when he saw Jason on the sofa with ledgers in his hands. He coughed. “Miss Webber.” He set her bags on the desk. “All clear, Jason. I’ll be on the door if you need me.”

“Thanks,” Jason stood and crossed to join her at the desk as Cody left. “Where’d you go after the hospital?”

“Gram asked me to lunch at the Grille,” Elizabeth said, tugging out some of the books. “And then she wanted to go shopping. I thought she meant for baby stuff, but my grandmother is nothing if not practical.” She held up a cooking book. “Beginner’s cookbooks because apparently, babies can’t subsist on brownies and takeout.”

She saw Jason smile at that, but was disappointed that his shoulders were tense. Still, she forged on. “So, she bought me some of these and then dragged me into the aisle of baby books so I could apparently clean them out on name books.” She unpacked the rest of her purchases, tucked the gift receipt in her jeans pocket and threw out the plastic bags from the store. “I was just so relieved she’s being supportive, I couldn’t argue.”

Jason took her books from her and led her over the couch. “Jason, I can carry the books. They’re not even that heavy. Kelly said I don’t need strict—”

He waited for her to sit before handing them back. “Is it worth having an argument you’re not going to win?”

“No,” Elizabeth sighed and flipped through the first pages of one of the cookbooks. “How…how did lunch with Emily go?”

“Ah…” Jason sighed and looked at the ceiling. “Not as well as I would have hoped. I wanted to reason with her, but that didn’t work, so I decided to take a page from Carly—”

“Oh…that cannot be good—”

“—and guilt her into being nicer to you,” he finished. “I told her that the way she’s been acting contributed to your forced bed rest. Which isn’t entirely true, because you didn’t go on the bed rest until after…” Jason shook his head. “But it’s true enough. She looked upset after that, so maybe she’ll knock it off.” He leaned back against the couch and looked at her. “I’m sorry.”

“I’m sorry, too,” Elizabeth murmured. “But you know…she loves you, Jason, and as much as you hate it, she wants to protect you from being hurt.” When his mouth tightened, she held up a hand. “I get it, that’s annoying to you because you think it means she doesn’t trust you to make your own decisions. But…” She shrugged and looked down at her book. “She just thinks she’s helping. Maybe…it’ll just…get better on its own.”

“You mean just ignore the problem and hope it goes away?” Jason asked, his eyebrows raised.

“It’s my patented life technique that almost never works, but…” Elizabeth hesitated. “She’s angry at me because of last summer. Zander’s not in town right now to mitigate her anger, and she thinks he left town because of me, but we both know he headed out after last fall because his dad showed up. She thinks I’m going to hurt you.” Staring down at instructions for cooking an omelet, Elizabeth bit her lip. “It’s not like she doesn’t have some history on her side.”

“Elizabeth, what’s between us is no one else’s business,” Jason began.

“Come on, that’s just not true.” She closed the book and leaned forward to set them on the table. “Jason, she’s your sister and until the last year, she was my best friend. She had a front row seat. Yes, we both know that I didn’t…mean to hurt you, that you weren’t angry at me, but she wasn’t there when we talked about these things. She thinks I’m the reason you left town last year, but you…” She paused. “I think you were already on your way out. I don’t…I don’t think I made you go.”

“No.” But he waited a moment. “I would have stayed a little longer, but after you…after that day in the park, I just moved up my departure.”

“Oh.” Elizabeth shook her head. “Anyway. I think Emily just needs…time. Maybe she and I will never be that close again, but I don’t know…” She twisted her fingers together and remembered that she wasn’t going to avoid talking about tomorrow anymore. “I guess….if the situation were what she thinks it is, I’d say that she’d learn to get past it because she knows how much you love Michael, and that having a child would be something you wanted. Except….” She took a deep breath and met his eyes, disconcerted that they seemed to be closed off to her. “That’s not…necessarily the situation we’re in.”

She hoped he would take the bait, hoped that he would say something, even if it was just to say they’d be in each other’s lives after this was over.

But he didn’t. Instead, he rubbed the back of his neck. “I don’t know what’s going to happen with Emily. Maybe you’re right, and she just needs time.”

Fine. She was going to have to be the brave one. Again. “Jason, what’s…going to happen after…Ric is dealt with?” she asked softly. “You told me we couldn’t change our minds because the Families are involved now. Won’t they be angry if they found out you…that we lied to them?”

“I…” Jason paused. “I guess I hadn’t really thought about it that way. I’ve been so focused on taking care of Ric and Faith…I guess I figured if they were out of the picture, the Families won’t care about this situation.”

Elizabeth arched an eyebrow. “You think they won’t care that you and Sonny asked them to use their resources on this child’s behalf after lying to them about the father?”

He closed his eyes. “You know there are things I can’t talk about—”

“Oh, God, Jason, that’s such a god damn cop out.” She got to her feet, her body tense. “You said that to me last fall, standing in this room. You told me there were things I couldn’t be told. Well, it wasn’t true then and it’s not true now. I am not asking for trade secrets or what you do when you go the warehouse or what you and Sonny talk about. I am talking about something that affects us personally, our possible safety. If the Families knew I was having Ric Lansing’s child, and that you and Sonny lied about it, even after Ric and Faith are dead, is that going to be an issue for you down the line?”

Jason blew out a slow breath before also rising to his feet. “I don’t know. I—Sonny wanted to involve them, I just said what I said to get Ric out of town. It wasn’t supposed to be this complicated.”

“Complicated.” Elizabeth closed her eyes. She was getting the picture. “Jason, I have been telling you from the start that we have to be honest with each other, but you’re just not getting it. So maybe it’s time I stop being vague. People think I’m having your child. And I’m not talking about your mother, my grandmother, our friends. I’m talking about men who see families as a target, as a point of weakness. I remember when Carly was dealing with them when Sonny was…gone…and they were harassing her, using what they thought was her grief and your weakness to push drugs through Port Charles. These are not men who are going to forgive a lie.”

“I…I get it.” Jason pressed the heel of his hand to his forehead. “I get that you don’t want your child in danger—”

“Jason, that’s not it.” Do not stamp your foot. She pressed her lips together and then tried again. “My child is in danger whether you’re her father or Ric is her father. You told me that they hated Ric and I’m sure they hate Faith Roscoe because she’s a woman. Do you think that we can just stop this when Ric and Faith are gone? Do you think that it’s going to be that easy? After putting guards on me, doubling them, putting me back in this penthouse?”

She jabbed a finger at him. “This is what happens all the time. You think it’s enough to walk away from me, as if people are just going to forget who I am. You walked away from me that first time, and it sure didn’t stop Sorel from badgering me or approaching me when you were gone. I was kidnapped because people saw us together, because they knew about our history.” She gestured toward the door. “You let me walk out of here last fall without a word, and didn’t seem to notice I was dating a psycho until he used Carly. It didn’t occur to you he was trying to use me to get to you.”

“Are…” Jason shook his head, irritated. “Are you actually blaming me for Ric, for getting you kidnapped? You told me you didn’t—”

“Sometimes I just want to scream,” Elizabeth muttered. She dragged her fingers through her hair and dipped her chin to the floor. “No. I am not blaming you for those things. But I do blame you for thinking that walking away is all it takes. You honestly think that after Ric and Faith are gone, I can just walk out this door, lose the guards and not have a problem. Is that what you’re hoping for?” she demanded. “That I’ll walk out of your life for good this time?”

“Why not?” Jason retorted. “You’ve never stayed before.”

“That…” Elizabeth fisted her hands at her side, her voice thick. “That is not fair. You left first, Jason. I begged you to stay, but you left anyway. And let’s talk about that day in April, where I finally have the courage to tell you I have feelings for you, that I care about you in a way I shouldn’t considering I was dating Lucky. And then you asked me to go. To leave with you.” When she saw him huff, she held out a hand as in protest. “But wait…that’s not true. You said I should go with you, or maybe not with you. It didn’t matter. Yeah, I was really supposed to walk away from my life on a maybe you’d be with me. How should I have trusted you?”

“Fine. I shouldn’t have asked you to leave with me. It was too soon and unfair. That’s clear,” Jason bit out. “But you walked out that door nine months ago and you never looked back—”

“All summer…” Elizabeth forced herself to take a deep breath. “You walked away from me. You took phone calls from Carly and left me for her. Every time she called, you were out the door. Do not tell me each and every one of those calls was an emergency you had to handle right there. I knew you cared about me, maybe you wanted to sleep with me, but I knew I didn’t rate above Sonny and Carly. And then you went and proved it—”

“I told you that Sonny and I were having issues—”

“I might actually scream this time.” Elizabeth stalked towards the kitchen. “I cannot keep saying the same things over and over again—”

Jason rounded the sofa and grabbed her elbow. “Damn it, Elizabeth, I told you I was sorry about not telling you about Sonny, about not coming home, not calling—”

“Now. Now you’ve explained it.” She yanked her arm away. “You have the nerve to stand there and tell me that I’ve never stayed before…well, Jason…you’ve never given me a reason to.”

Her heart pounding, she continued. “Even now, you’re doing everything you can to shove me out the door faster. Every time I bring up my child, you get this haunted look in your eyes, this trapped look, and I know what’s going to happen. Even after Ric and Faith are out of the picture, you’re going to look like that. Because you can’t let yourself for one minute forget that this baby is Ric’s. So don’t worry, Jason. The next time I walk out that door, it will be for good.”

She turned again, to go upstairs or to the kitchen, she was never sure, but Jason grabbed both her arms and whirled back to face him. She opened her mouth to protest, but he covered with his, all his anger and frustration pouring into her like a volcanic eruption. Startled, Elizabeth tried to draw back, but he just tightened his grip, almost as if he thought she had meant she was leaving right now.

Well, hell. She kissed him back, letting her own frustration and desire through. This time…she wasn’t stopping unless the building collapsed.