10Don’t you know I feel the darkness closing in
Tried to be more than me
And I gave till it all went away

December 6, 2007

Morgan & Corinthos Warehouse: Coffee Shop

There were many things that Lesley Lu Spencer was not proud of. She was not proud that she destroyed a marriage, that she had not told her brother the truth about Cady’s paternity, and instead allowed Jason to interrupt the wedding and announce the truth.

And she was not proud of the way she had participated in her family’s treatment of Elizabeth after the truth had been revealed. Lucky had publicly denounced her, Luke had given her the cold shoulder and Nikolas…well, he’d stopped speaking to Elizabeth completely.

And Lulu had used every opportunity to berate her former sister-in-law, whether she was in public or in private, whether her children were in tow or not.

Not her proudest year all in all.

Her outlook on the situation had begun to change after the custody battle was initiated. While Lulu could never agree with Elizabeth’s decision to keep the truth from everyone involved and then ask Jason to give up his rights to his child, she couldn’t understand why Jason would have gone to such lengths to take Cady away, to humiliate Elizabeth to the degree that a judge had found her an unfit parent completely.

She wasn’t particularly proud of the fact that she had not stood up for Elizabeth then, the way Elizabeth had always stood up for her—that she hadn’t taken Elizabeth’s side at least once. Elizabeth had been the first to take her side when Lulu herself had been pregnant and Elizabeth had always been the one to stop by the Spencer house when her own father and brothers had ignored her.

Elizabeth had been her sister longer than she’d been her brother’s wife and Lulu wasn’t sure if she could forgive herself for forgetting the fact.

Sitting here, in this coffee shop, she watched Sam and Jason across the room with Cady in a carrier seat. Jason was speaking in low tones and whatever he was saying, Sam wasn’t happy with. Good, Lulu thought. She should be as miserable as Elizabeth. Lulu had no doubt that Sam had somehow engineered this tragedy.

“Earth to the Blonde One.”

Lulu jumped when Spinelli snapped his fingers in front of her face. “What? When?”

“Nothing. You were just spacing. What has you so distracted?”

Lulu started to shake her head but she realized she had an opportunity to make things right—to make up for her actions of the past year and be a better person.

Someone her mother would be proud of.

“Have you noticed anything odd about the whole…” Lulu gestured towards the Stepford Family From Hell. “I just—I can’t make myself accept that someone would give them a child over Elizabeth.”

“Dude, Stone Cold swears there was no monkey business but I figure he’s in denial.” Spinelli slurped his latte. “I mean, dude forgot he was suing for complete custody. Maybe he can’t face what he did.”

Lulu narrowed her eyes. “What do you mean, he forgot?”

“I was attempting to convince Stone Cold to hand Little Goddess back so that, you know, I could get some sleep and he said that she had practically forced him to file for joint custody.”

“But he filed for complete custody,” Lulu said. “That’s not something you forget.”

“He’s just so wigged out right now, probably a guilt thing. I bet he’s regretting giving Former Goddess the go ahead at all—”

“Wait—” Lulu held up her hand. “Sam handled the custody papers?”

“Stone Cold couldn’t seem to bring himself to do it, but the more Nightingale refused to let him visit the kid—”

“Jason stopped visiting Cady,” Lulu said. “Robin told me that Sam showed up one day and stated that he was tired of coming to her apartment, that Elizabeth disgusted him—”

“No, no, Blonde One, you must have misunderstood,” Spinelli shook his head. “If Stone Cold had had his way, they’d all be one big happy family. He totally worships her—”

“But he still took her kids away.”

“Well, yeah, that’s got me pretty stumped,” Spinelli admitted. “But he was always happier after a visit with them. I figured, before long, the dynamics of the situation would be different. Former Goddess would be out and Nightingale would be in.”

“Well, duh, I think we all saw that coming–” Lulu tapped her fingers. “How easy would it have been for Sam to file for complete custody instead of joint? I mean, would Jason have caught on?”

“I don’t think so,” Spinelli admitted reluctantly. “He seemed pretty broken up by the whole affair. He just told Sam to call Diane and file the papers.”

“Which means that Jason could have easily meant to file for joint custody. Sam’s the common factor, Spinelli. She was the go between—”

“No way, she wouldn’t do that,” Spinelli argued.

“She used to make her living as a con artist. She knows how to play people against each other.” Lulu sat back in her chair. “Now all we have to do is prove it.”

Spinelli narrowed his eyes. “I thought we were looking for your dad.”

“He always comes back,” Lulu stated. “This is more important.”

“Forgive me, Blonde One, for pointing out the obvious but you don’t even like Nightingale these days—”

“Why should that matter?” Lulu demanded. “You don’t always have to like family, but you do have to look out for them.”

11
And we’ve only surrendered
To the worst part of these winters we’ve madeDecember 10, 2007

General Hospital: Doctor’s Lounge

“I still think we should go with the eggshell for the living room,” Robin said, holding up a paint sample. Patrick glanced up from his medical journal.

“You mean the white?”

She narrowed her eyes. “You only say that to annoy me. You know eggshell is not the same thing white.” Robin huffed.

“Uh huh, and ivory and off white are different too,” he murmured. “White’s fine, Robin.”

“Eggshell,” Robin repeated. “Eggshell.”

“Eggshell,” Patrick echoed. “You should throw in some yolk.” He brightened to this. “We should make it a breakfast theme, maybe get some pictures of bacon to hang on the wall and sausage shaped pillows for the sofa.”

Robin rolled her eyes. “Yolk’s not a color.”

“Oh, of course not. That would be silly.”

Before Robin could open a can of whoop ass and make Patrick give a damn about the house color scheme that was due to the painters by the end of the week, Elizabeth sat down at their table. “Hey,” Robin hastily shut her binder and shoved it out of sight. She immediately felt guilty—her focus should be on helping Elizabeth get her kids back, not worrying about what color to paint a living room she didn’t technically own yet. “How are you doing today?”

“Better,” Elizabeth said. “I ran into Jason yesterday and he let me hold Cady.” Her hands shook a bit as she sipped her tea. “I almost didn’t want to give her back but running away with her wouldn’t have solved anything. The only thing that gets me through any of this is that I know he’s a good father and that he loves her. That much will always be true.”

“You’re too nice,” Patrick grumbled. “You need to get pissed off, Liz.”

“I am.” Elizabeth took a deep breath. “And now I’m desperate. If Jason isn’t willing to follow the law with this, I don’t see why I should either. Robin, I think it’s time I spoke to your father.”

“About time—” Patrick began but Robin held up a hand silencing him.

“You know it’s not that easy,” Robin softly. “If you disappear, if you take Cameron and Cady away, you can’t come back. You can’t ever come back. You can’t make contact; you have to leave everyone behind.”

“I know that,” Elizabeth swallowed hard. “And it’s not something I decided on a whim. The truth is that the only people I would miss are you and Patrick. No one else has stood by me the way you two have. You both stood up for me in court and I’m not sure I would be able to stay sane if not for you.”

“I appreciate that—” Robin started.

“We’d miss you, no mistake about that,” Patrick interrupted. “But you know I’m behind you in this. You have to do what’s necessary to get your kids back and Jason’s blocked every legal channel. He’s left you no choice and he deserves what’s coming to him.”

“No argument there,” Robin agreed. “Listen, I’ll call my dad and see if he’ll come to town. There’s no reason we can’t try a few other options first, maybe arrange some back door dealing of my own. Let’s make disappearing our last resort, okay?”

“All right,” Elizabeth nodded. “That sounds fair but I’m not going to live without my kids. I need my little boy back.” She hesitated. “I think I could have survived losing Cady. Jason’s a good father and she’d be well provided for…but Cam’s living in some group home. He’s scared and he doesn’t know what’s going on.” Her voice broke. “He needs his mom.”

“I’m going to make sure you get your kids back—both of them,” Patrick promised, “if I have to kidnap them myself. This isn’t over, Elizabeth.”

After they had left, Emily stepped out from behind a door that led to the other hallway. She pressed a fist to her mouth and wondered where her loyalties were supposed to lie now.

12
No I would not sleep in this bed of lies
So toss me out and turn inMorgan Penthouse

Her knocks going unanswered, Emily pushed open the door to the penthouse. Her ears were immediately filled with her niece’s frantic cries. Two weeks after her removal from her mother’s home and still, Cady hadn’t adjusted.

Emily supposed that said it all.

She climbed the stairs and entered Cady’s nursery, remembering the day Jason had asked her to set it up. She had wondered if Sam would be a better choice, but her brother hadn’t agreed. Emily thought maybe Jason was beginning to see what most people had known for months—that Sam was on her way out and Elizabeth was on her way in.

And yet, just six months later, the situation was completely different. It seemed that Elizabeth and Jason would never find their way to one another and Sam was going to be sticking around.

The idea of it made her slightly ill.

Jason was seated in the rocking chair, rubbing small circles into his daughter’s back. He was speaking to her softly, Emily couldn’t make out the words but it wasn’t soothing Cady. She knew what she wanted and she wasn’t getting it in this penthouse.

“Jase?” Emily said softly. “We have to talk.”

Jason glanced up at her. “It’s not a good time.”

“It will never be a good time.” Determined, Emily strode forward and took Cady into her arms. As if sensing that this was not a person directly responsible for taking her from her mother, the infant quieted. Emily sighed and kissed her cheek before settling the infant in her crib. “Jason, this has to stop.”

Her brother scrubbed his hands over his eyes and nodded. “I know, but I don’t know how to make this right. I don’t even know what happened.”

“Jase…why did you sue for complete custody?” Emily asked. She knelt in front of him and did her best to meet his eyes. “How could you want to take Cady away?”

“I didn’t file for—Elizabeth filed for complete custody. She wouldn’t let me see Cady, she—”

“In your heart, you know that’s not true.” Emily chewed her lip. “You know Elizabeth better than anyone. You always have. You know she would never keep you from Cady.”

“I thought I did, but when Sam told me—”

“Sam?” Emily cocked her head to the side. “What does Sam have to do with any of this?”

“She’s the one that told me Elizabeth didn’t want me in Cady’s life anymore,” Jason explained. “I was running late for my day with Cady and I asked Sam to pick her up. Maybe that wasn’t the best solution, but I knew Elizabeth had to be at work and I didn’t want to be the reason she was late. But Sam came home without her and said that Elizabeth was refusing to let me see Cady anymore, that she didn’t want me anywhere near her.”

“And you believed that?” Emily asked, incredulously. “You didn’t think to ask Elizabeth yourself?”

“I tried,” Jason argued. “I called her but she was crying and then she hung up on me. I went to see her, but she slammed the door in my face. Sam thought maybe if we filed for joint custody, Elizabeth would change her mind or the judge would give me visitation rights but—”

“Jason…you filed for complete custody,” Emil said softly. “I was with Elizabeth when she got served. She was devastated but…”

“No,” Jason shook his head. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. Sam filed—”

“Sam again,” Emily muttered. “Jason, exactly what part of this custody battle did you handle? Because it sounds like you took Sam’s word for everything. That Elizabeth was denying you visitation, that Sam filed for joint custody…I bet Sam handled all the preparation, telling Diane where to look for all that damaging information—”

“No, Sam was just trying to help—”

“More like she was helping herself to your kid!” Emily exploded. She jumped to her feet. “Jesus, Jason, don’t be so damn blind! For months all Sam could talk about was having your child and then she had to watch as Elizabeth replaced her in every way. She saw her opening and she took it. Sam’s a con artist, there’s nothing more she knows better than playing a mark and you know it.”

And the trouble was that of course he knew it. Elizabeth had never once said to his face that she would deny him access to Cady. She had never given him any indication that she was planning to either. She was honest.

And Sam had had free reign over the custody battle. He’d been too sick with guilt and misery to realize just how much she had controlled it. He hadn’t even bothered to tell Diane what would be off limits. Elizabeth’s rape, her marriage to Ric, the faking of her own death…how could he have let his lawyer rip her apart that way?

“Jason, if you don’t make this right, if you don’t fix this, Elizabeth is going to take her kids and disappear,” Emily cautioned softly. “And I’m not sure you wouldn’t deserve it right now.”

13
And there’ll be no rest for these tired eyes
I’m marking it down to learning
I amKelly’s Courtyard

“You look tired.”

Sam paused at the door and turned back to find Lulu smirking at her from the entrance to the parking lot. “What do you care?”

“I don’t.” Lulu sauntered forward. “You know, I never really liked you. Mostly because I couldn’t understand what anyone saw you in you. The way I heard it was that you were a two bit con artist.”

“I don’t have to listen to this—” Sam gripped the door handle but Lulu grabbed her arm and shoved her back.

“You do have to listen,” Lulu snarled. “You will stand there and you will listen to me. You are poison, Sam. You destroy everything you touch. You took your own mother’s solid marriage and drove them into divorce court. You wrecked your sisters’ lives, but that doesn’t seem to matter to me—”

“What do you know about it, you little bitch?” Sam demanded. “That was all on Ric—”

“I’m not saying he wasn’t at fault, but I know you weren’t blameless. You’re a filthy slut and you know it. I wouldn’t be surprised if you had seduced him. And then you have the nerve to hold a one night against Jason and Elizabeth. One night where they needed each other, because he had seen you gyrating on your own stepfather and she had seen her husband with another filthy little slut. You had the nerve to make that about you. But even that’s not why I hate you.”

“Oh really?”

“I hate you because you have no regard for the collateral damage.” Lulu paused. “Kristina and Molly don’t have their parents together anymore. Cameron is just a little boy and he should be with his mother,” Lulu said. “Cady deserves to have her mother and that’s what really pisses you off. You knew Jason was slipping away, that he was going to end up with Elizabeth and those kids by the end of the year. You know how to play people against each other, Sam, it’s your only real talent. I pity you for that. You’ll never know real love, real friendship, real family. When you look at person, all you see is what you can get from them.”

Lulu stepped back from her. “And what really ticks you off? You know this can’t last forever. Sooner or later, Jason’s going to take the blinders off and he’s going to realize what you did to him, to Elizabeth. He might have been able to put that behind him, but what you did to Cameron and Cady?” Lulu shook her head. “I’d cut my ties and run now, Sam. Because Jason doesn’t tend to let people who hurt his kids live.”

She sent the silent woman a jaunty little wave and walked out of the courtyard.

14
I am all that I’ll ever be
When you – lay your hands
Over me but don’t go weak on me nowElizabeth’s Apartment

December 15, 2007

Elizabeth stared at the blank piece of paper. She was trying to write her grandmother, to explain why she could not see her anymore, why she would never hear from her again but the words wouldn’t come. She and her grandmother weren’t exactly on the best of terms, but they rarely were.

For as long as Elizabeth had lived in Port Charles, Audrey had been her constant. Despite their arguments and their differences of opinions, her grandmother had been there for her when it mattered and she never held their problems against Cameron or Cady. She loved her great-grandchildren and losing them had almost broken her as well.

She wondered if perhaps Audrey would consider disappearing with her. There was no family left, Steven and Sarah never wrote, never called and Elizabeth couldn’t remember the last time that she had heard from her parents. She would have to ask Robert if it was a possibility.

Now that she had made her decision to disappear, she was impatient for Robin to find her father and arrange for him to come to Port Charles. She wanted this to be over this.

She wanted to hold her children.

A hesitant knock sounded at the door. Elizabeth stared at it for a long time before rising to answer it.

“What do you want?” she said, scathingly. She kept the door propped open only a few inches—she didn’t want Jason to think he was welcome.

“We need to talk, Elizabeth. We need to fix this,” he told her. “Just you and me. No Sam. No Patrick or Robin. You and me. This is about our children—” he stopped himself. He hadn’t realized that he considered Cameron his son until the word had tumbled from his mouth. “No one else needs to be involved.”

“All right,” Elizabeth said warily. She stepped back and slid the door open to allow him entrance. “What do you want?”

“Do you have copies of the papers from the custody hearing?” Jason asked. “The papers you were served with?”

She stared at him, wondering if he could be that cruel but somewhere inside her—the small piece of her heart that had always insisted that this was a mistake, that he loved her and she loved him—that piece of her answered. “Yes.”

“I need to see them, I need to see what you received,” he told her. “Please.”

Bewildered, she crossed to her desk and removed a thick folder. She flipped through several sections before she found what he was looking for her. She handed them to him and watched him as he skimmed through them.

He swallowed hard and raised his eyes to meet hers. “This isn’t what I asked Sam to do.”

“I don’t…” Elizabeth shook her head. “What are you talking about?”

“I asked Sam to file for visitation rights, for joint custody.” Jason clenched his fist, wrinkling the papers without thinking. “This says complete custody, that I think you’re an unfit mother.”

“That’s what you said in court—” Elizabeth stopped and she blinked. “But you didn’t. You didn’t testify. You never said a word in court.”

“I couldn’t…” he stopped. “From start to finish, the whole situation felt wrong but I never figured out why. I couldn’t believe we were in court at all, and I just—I never asked Diane to do what she did. I never wanted her to go where she did. All I wanted was for her to prove that I was fit to see Cady.”

“Which she did. By proving what a mess I am,” Elizabeth folded her arms. “What is the point of this? What is the point of going over what we did, what we didn’t do—”

“I trusted Sam more than I should have. I asked her to contact Diane, she filed the custody papers and she met with the lawyer. I couldn’t—I couldn’t bring myself to do any of it.”

“Are you trying to tell me that this is Sam’s fault?” Elizabeth demanded. “Is that your excuse?”

“No—” Jason stepped forward. “No, I just want you to understand that I never wanted any of this. I wanted—” he paused but forced himself to continue. “I wanted our family. You, me, Cady, and Cameron—I never wanted—”

“So you never said that I was a bad mother and that you wanted me out of Cady’s life?” Elizabeth interrupted. “And I suppose Sam said something equally nasty to you about why I wouldn’t let you see Cady—”

“She told me you didn’t want me around anymore—”

“That’s fine,” Elizabeth broke in. “It even makes some sense but it doesn’t fix anything, Jason. Because you still believed her. You still sat in court while Diane Miller interrogated me about my rape, about my marriage to Ric, my marriage to Lucky, the fact that Cady was conceived while I was still married—all the things that made me look like poor trash—you sat there and you never said a word.”

“I know—”

“I want my daughter back,” Elizabeth cut in. “I want my son back. You can have all the visitation you want and when Cady is older, you can have her for weekends and holidays. We can work out whatever arrangements you want but you and I are done. Maybe we were heading somewhere before, it’s impossible to know that now.”

“Elizabeth, I know my apology isn’t enough,” he began.

“It’s not. All the apologies in the world will never make up for the last few months of my life,” Elizabeth said. “Because you never spoke up. You knew something was wrong and you still sat quiet.” She tilted her head to the side. “Was this payback? For asking you to stay silent about Cady? For my attempting to go back to Lucky?”

“No, I would never do that—”

“Probably not,” Elizabeth agreed softly. “I don’t deny that I hurt you. I’ve hurt you a thousand times in a thousand ways since we became friends and maybe I deserved to be dragged into court for what I put you through last year but I didn’t deserve to have my son taken from me, for you to bring that woman into my home to take my daughter. Bring my kids home, Jason. Maybe then I’ll be in a better frame of mind to discuss making amends.”

Jason nodded. “I’ve already contacted the necessary judges. Sam bribed them for the outcome—I’m doing the same to vacate the ruling. I’ll have Cameron and Cady back to you tomorrow at the latest.”

“Fine.” She pushed past him and opened the door. “I don’t want you in my home right now.”

15
I know that it’s weak
But God help me I need thisHospital: Doctor’s Lounge

December 16, 2007

Elizabeth found Patrick grumbling over paint samples the next day. “Where’s Robin?” she asked, stopping at the vending machine.

“Probably devising some other method to torture me. Maybe a furniture catalog.” He set the samples aside and turned his attention to her. “Are you having second thoughts?”

“Well, if this afternoon goes the way I was promised, I won’t need them.” Elizabeth hesitated. “Jason came by yesterday. He asked to see my copy of the custody papers.”

“What, to drive the knife in further? If I didn’t need these hands to pay off this house—”

“No, no,” she shook her head. “He told me that Sam had been in charge of everything, filing, meeting with the lawyer and he found out she was the one that paid off the judges.”

“Way to shove the blame aside,” Patrick said. “But it wouldn’t surprise me. So, he’s giving Cady back. Is he greasing the wheels to give you Cameron?”

“He said he’d have them back by this afternoon.” She met his eyes. “But I’m terrified that it won’t happen. That I might never see my son again. It’s been three weeks since I’ve hugged him, tucked him in…” she stopped and closed her eyes. “Jason seemed to think that finding out how it happened and getting my children back fixed everything. That it could all go back to the way it was before.”

“But it can’t,” Patrick said. “Because he believed Sam in the first place.” He tapped the samples absently. “I’m not a deep introspective person, Liz. But Robin’s drummed a few things into my head the last year or two and I don’t blame you for being angry. He sat back and watched it happen.”

“Exactly my point. How can I ever feel the same way about him?” Elizabeth asked. “How can I ever trust him?”

“I can’t answer the second, but you know the first hasn’t changed and I think that pisses you off the most. Last year, when Robin left me, pretended to be with Nikolas…” he shook his head. “I was pissed. I was hurt, yeah, but more than that, I wanted to hurt her- to hurt him. After everything we’d been through together, after almost losing her barely a month before, how could I have forgiven her?”

“She did that to protect you,” Elizabeth answered. “Who was Jason protecting?”

“Probably nobody. My point is—and I say this even though I hate him and I think you deserve better—my point is that you loved him before this happened and I don’t think that’s changed.”

“No,” Elizabeth admitted. “And you’re right. That makes me even angrier. That after all we’ve been through, after all we’ve done to each other, that nothing’s changed. I still love him as much as I did when I was eighteen.” She laughed brokenly. “It’s not fair.”

16
I will not sleep in this bed of lies
So toss me out and turn inMorgan Penthouse

Sam entered the penthouse, fighting back a yawn. She was not looking forward to another night of listening to Cady scream.

This had never been the plan. She was supposed to be the perfect mother so that Jason would love her again and never leave her. But Cady was not cooperating and Sam could see her dreams running down the drain. If a no one like Lulu Spencer could see through this, then how much longer would Jason put up with his daughter’s unhappiness?

She was losing everything and she couldn’t figure out how to con her way back inside.

She closed the door and started up the steps. Something caught the corner of her eye and she turned to find Spinelli on the couch, cradling Cady. A quiet Cady.

Sam smiled faintly. “She’s not crying.”

Spinelli stood and Sam frowned as the usually verbose young man couldn’t quite meet her eyes and said nothing to her, only kept his attention on his charge. “Spinelli, where’s Jason?”

“Right here.”

Sam turned to find Jason descending the stairs, Cady’s bright pink diaper bag over one arm and a small suitcase in his hand. “W-What’s going on?” she asked, shakily.

“Little Goddess is returning to her former abode,” Spinelli said. He patted Cady’s back. “Do you want me to take her down to the car while you…ah…handle things?”

“Yeah, go ahead. Tell Milo I’ll be right down.” Jason waited until Spinelli was gone before turning back to Sam. “I want you out of here when I get back. Take whatever you want, I don’t care. I just want you gone.”

“I don’t understand,” Sam stepped forward, to reach out to him. “What happened? Why are you doing this to me, to our family?”

“This is not our family,” Jason said coldly. “This is my family. This is Elizabeth’s family. These last few months—the custody hearings—was a mistake. And I’m making it right.”

“Jason, wait a second, I did this for you—so you could have your daughter—”

“I had my daughter. You destroyed Elizabeth’s life, took away her children—” he shook his head. “I don’t owe you any explanations. You have an hour. If you’re not out by then, I’ll have you removed.

He walked out of the door and Sam watched him go, still not understanding what had just happened to her.

17
And there’ll be no rest for these tired eyes
I’m marking it down to learning
I’m marking it down to learning
‘Cause I amElizabeth’s Apartment

Elizabeth opened the door and found Spinelli in the hallway, carrying Cady. “I come bringing the Little Goddess in hopes you can make her happier than we have.” He held her out and Elizabeth took her daughter, holding her for the second time in three weeks.
She stared at her daughter’s face, smoothing her fingertips across Cady’s soft skin. “Where’s Jason?”

“Stone Cold had another stop to make.” Spinelli hoisted the suitcase into his hand. “Shall I bring her things in?”

“Yes, yes, come in.” Elizabeth stepped back and let him in. She closed the door and pressed her lips to Cady’s head. “Oh, God, I never thought this day would come. I didn’t think—” Cady cooed and laughed and reached for the strands of her mother’s hair.

“Stone Cold was most adamant about correcting his grievous injustices. The unnamed one was given one hour to remove herself from our humble abode.” Spinelli coughed. “I hope this means the supply of your most bodacious brownies will flow once more.”

“Anything you want, Spinelli. I’ll make a batch just for you after…” Elizabeth stopped and stared as Jason pushed open the door, Cameron’s small hand in his. “Cameron.”

“Mommy!” Cameron wrenched his hand from Jason’s and ran forward. Elizabeth knelt and gathered Cameron in her other arm, shifting Cady to the side. “Mommy!”

“Oh, baby, baby,” Elizabeth showered kisses on Cameron’s face, his curls, his cheeks. “Are you all right? Are you hungry? Can I get you anything?”

“I missed you, Mommy.” Cameron burrowed. “Why did I have to go away? Was I bad?”

“Oh, baby, no, no…” Elizabeth started to cry. Jason motioned for Spinelli to retrieve Cady. He bent down behind Cameron.

“Your mommy had nothing do with you going away. That was my fault,” he told him.

Cameron sniffled and rubbed his hand under his nose. He turned to Jason with those big brown eyes. “You don’t like me no more?”

“That’s not it, buddy. I made some mistakes and I trusted the wrong people. Your mommy wanted to bring you home so much.”

“Okay.” Cameron seemed to accept that his mother was blameless and wrapped his arms around her neck once more. “Can I have some pizza? I missed pizza.”

Elizabeth laughed and nodded. “I think there’s some frozen pizza in the kitchen. Spinelli, can you take him in? He likes to help put it on the cookie sheet.”

“Aye aye, Nightingale. Come, Young One, we shall make some munchies.” Spinelli cradled Cady gently and directed Cameron into kitchen.

As soon as they were out of earshot, Elizabeth stepped towards Jason. “Thank you…thank you so much for bringing my babies home. For making sure I had them before Christmas.” She pressed her fingers to her lips, struggling to regain her composure. “You can’t know how much it means to me.”

Jason nodded. “I know I can never make it right or ask you to forgive me, but maybe we could find a way to get past this.” He held out his hand. “Please.”

Elizabeth stared at his hand for a long moment, remembering the times she had taken it, and the times that she hadn’t. Maybe she couldn’t forgive him, but she couldn’t just forget the months after Cady was born—when she could almost believe they were a family.

She placed her hand in his. “We can try.”

6
And we softly surrender
To these lives that we’ve tendered awayDecember 5, 2007

General Hospital: Chief of Staff’s Office

“I’m concerned for one of my nurses.”

Epiphany Johnson didn’t enjoy asking doctors for help, she certainly didn’t enjoy going to a Quartermaine about this particular nurse but she’d been left without any alternatives.

“If you have an issue, you should take it up with Bobbie Spencer or Audrey Hardy,” Monica Quartermaine said absently as she examined a list of items for the board meeting that afternoon.

“It’s not an issue of her work,” Epiphany continued, “but her mental health and I thought I could appeal to you.”

That brought Monica’s head up and she frowned. “Elizabeth,” she realized. She set her pen down. “She’s not handling the custody ruling well?”

“Would you?” Epiphany demanded. “Some judge who don’t know a damn thing about you or yours taking away your babies? Would you be able to function?”

“No.” Monica sighed and rubbed her forehead. “No, I wouldn’t. Is she showing up for work?”

“She’s doing the job,” Epiphany confirmed. “But she used to take initiative, she used to spend time with the patients, look out for them. She was taking some of the new hires under her wing, functioning as a mentor to some of the volunteers. She was making a name for herself, Dr. Quartermaine. Well on her way to becoming a charge nurse.” The nurse shifted. “I don’t like what I’m seeing from her. She’s lost her babies, she’s lost a lot of her support system and the hospital gossip is that she’s been unsuccessful in getting an appeal filed, that your son has blocked her from doing anything to overturn the ruling by lining the pockets of clerks and judges.”

“I won’t pretend I know the situation,” Monica said. “Or that I particularly agree with what Jason has done, but I don’t know what you think I can do.”

“Do what mothers are supposed to do,” Epiphany huffed. “Smack him upside the head and tell him to start treating the girl right. If the situation doesn’t improve, I don’t like the road she’s traveling.”

7
No I would not sleep in this bed of lies
So toss me out and turn in…Morgan Penthouse

Damien Spinelli stepped inside the door and smiled widely. He’d just had the singular most awesome moment in his entire life. Lulu Spencer was hot on the trail of her absent father and after he, the Jackal, had found traces of Luke in England, The Blonde One had hugged him quite fiercely.

He would be able to float for days on that.

If only his motley family type group was having as a good a day as Spinelli, Emperor of the Hot, Grateful Chicks. Little Goddess had cried for a week straight and it was seriously beginning to interfere with the Jackal’s sleep. Stone Cold had been glaring at everyone in sight, though Spinelli was mostly used to that by now.

Life had been quieter before Stone Cold had brought the kid around permanently and life had been happier before the Woman Formerly Known as Goddess had started to muck things up.

Spinelli pursed his lips and started up the steps to his room, reflecting on how much happier Stone Cold had been when Little Goddess was with Nightingale.

Speaking of the miniscule one, he could hear her shrieking all the way down the hall. If this kept up, he was going to have to start looking for alternate lodging and that wasn’t something he was prepared to consider–or afford.

Spinelli ambled down the hallway and lounged against the partially open doorway to find Former Goddess trying to rock Little Goddess to sleep. She didn’t notice him.

“Why won’t you stop crying?” Sam pleaded. Her face was drawn, her hair was limp and she looked like she hadn’t slept in days–which she probably hadn’t, Spinelli reflected. None of them had.

“Please stop crying,” Sam continued, her throat hoarse. “I’m a good mother, I love you so much. I can give you more than Elizabeth, why can’t you just stop crying and go to sleep for me?” She adjusted Cady’s position and tried to rub her back in small circles. “This isn’t fair–after everything I did to get you, all you do is cry! It isn’t fair!”

Spinelli eased away from the door, troubled by the scene. He’d been surprised when Stone Cold had brought the kid home for good because Jason had told him it would probably end in joint custody, which made sense to Spinelli, since each parent had filed for complete custody.

Had Former Goddess messed with things? Spinelli pondered. It wouldn’t really surprise him–she’d been unhappy since the Nightingale had turned to be knocked up by Stone Cold. She’d constantly asked him to bring Cady around more and wondered why she had to spend so much time with Elizabeth, why Jason was always over there.

He’d liked Nightingale. She was usually happy and had cookies around but whenever he’d seen her lately, she’d been quiet and there were usually tearstains on her cheeks. She didn’t look much better than Former Goddess, Spinelli decided.

Maybe it was time to get Stone Cold involved. He would set things right. He could give Little Goddess back to her mother and they could all sleep at night.

8
And there’ll be no rest for these tired eyes
I’m marking it down to learning
I amGeneral Hospital: Cafeteria

Most afternoons, Mac Scorpio would be pleased to have lunch with his niece and her boyfriend. It gave him an opportunity to check in on her, make sure the idiot was still making her relatively happy, which seemed to be case since they were buying a house together. He was still reserving his judgment about that venture.

But today, on this particular day, he wished he were elsewhere.

When Robin was younger, she’d had a habit of asking questions he didn’t quite know how to answer. Thankfully, that had faded as she grew older but today, she was trying to find ways to help Elizabeth Webber and Mac didn’t really know how to answer her questions–something that had been occurring again since the vicious and bitter Morgan-Webber custody battle had started.

How did an alleged mobster and a former con artist get custody of an infant over a hardworking nurse descended from the one of the most respected families in the entire city?

Not fairly, Mac agreed.

How could people who had always professed to be someone’s family or best friend like Nikolas or Emily just suddenly abandon Elizabeth without a second thought?

Selfish bastards, Mac had told himself.

How could someone survive losing their children, knowing that if things didn’t change, their daughter would grow up thinking someone else was her mother?

Probably couldn’t, Mac had admitted silently.

“Hoes does one go about bribing judges?” Patrick wondered. “Do you just pick one and go with it?”

And now the boyfriend was going to ask questions Mac didn’t have an answer to, though he could certainly sympathize with Patrick. As Elizabeth’s last remaining friends, the two were now resorting to breaking the law and in their place, Mac wasn’t entirely sure he’d do anything different.

“I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that,” Mac said, choosing the safest answer. “I’d hate to arrest you.”

“Well, I don’t know what else to do,” Robin said, tossing her napkin on her tray. “Patrick and I can’t offer much more than moral support until after the new year because everything’s tied up in the house but the one appeal Elizabeth’s lawyer filed before she had to let him go was rejected.”

Mac frowned. “Rejected? How did it get rejected without even going to court?”

“The clerk said something was missing or some sort of legalese than no one really understood but I don’t know why it matters. Jason clearly isn’t stopping at just taking Cady, he’s making sure she can’t get Cam back either,” Patrick said, disgusted. He saw Emily taking a seat across the room with another intern and narrowed his eyes.

“Stop glaring at Emily,” Robin smacked his hand. “This isn’t entirely her fault and sending her death glares is just going to make things worse.”

“I’m willing to accept that Jason bribed a judge to get custody of Cady,” Mac allowed, “but I’ll tell you, Robin, something about this entire situation has never felt right to me. There are many things I don’t like about Jason Morgan, but he has always been devoted to Elizabeth. It just seems odd that he would have sued her for complete custody.”

“I know but how can you dispute it now?” Robin replied. “He did sue her for complete custody–”

“But he never stood up in court. Sam testified, Carly testified, but Jason himself never got on the stand and said he wanted his daughter away from Elizabeth. It just seems if he was willing to take Cady away, he would have been willing to do that.”

“I know, Uncle Mac, but he did take Cady away–”

“I’m going to give Dara Jensen a call. She works in the DA’s office, maybe she can ask some questions. There might be someone in the family court division that can tell her what’s going on.” Mac shook his head. “Nothing about this seems right.”

9
Don’t wanna be the one who turns the whole thing over
Don’t wanna be somewhere where I just don’t belong
Where it’s not enough just be sorryCorinthos & Morgan Warehouse

The last person Jason wanted to see this morning was Spinelli. It was bad enough that the juvenile delinquent had somehow taken up permanent residence down the hall but for the kid to show up at work–today of all days–it was almost more than he could stand.

“What?” he snapped.

“Dude, chill out, Stone Cold.” Spinelli held up his hands in mock surrender. “I come in peace. I need to talk to you about Sam and Little Goddess–”

Jason sat in his seat behind his desk and put his head in his hands. “It’s none of your business–”

“Au contraire, Silent One,” Spinelli argued. “I have to sleep down the hall and she does not seem to respect the boundaries. Plus, I was on my way here and I ran into Nightingale on the docks and we had the creepiest conversation about water.”

Jason’s head snapped up. “Nightingale?” he repeated. “That’s Elizabeth isn’t it?”

“Dude, I knew sooner or later you’d speak the Spinelli. Everyone does,” he replied cheerfully. “Yeah, she was just standing by the water, staring in so you know, I go to say hi but I don’t think she really knew I was there because she just kept talking about water and how she never really liked the ocean or lakes and hates to swim.” He frowned. “And then she said something about wanting to let go, which did not sound at all cool. Then she just turned and left.”

“Where was she going?” Jason demanded.

“Not sure, Stone Cold, but I actually came here with a proposition,” Spinelli said. He continued to speak even though Jason was standing and pulling on his leather jacket. “I think you should give the judge back his money and give Little Goddess back to the Nightingale.”

Jason stopped and turned to look at the teenager with an irritated glare. “I did not bribe a judge!”

“Whatever, dude. I’m not, like, spreading the word or anything but everyone knows that’s what happened.”

Everyone thought so anyway, Jason thought bitterly. His own mother had stopped by and read him the riot act about bribing judges to take kids away from their mother and now this little miscreant was going to accuse him of the same thing–it was almost more than he could take.

He grabbed Spinelli by the collar and shoved him against a metal cabinet, his feet making a jangling noise as they dangled. “I didn’t steal Cady!”

“Whatever, I’ll toe the line,” Spinelli said, unperturbed by the temper tantrum. He was quite used this. “But seriously, Stone Cold, what do you expect people to think? Pretty hard working nurse loses kids custody of kid to, you know…you?”

Jason set him on his feet and muttered under his breath. “I’m tired of being accused of stealing Cady from Elizabeth, of setting her up to lose her kids. Anyone who thinks I’d do that obviously doesn’t know me.”

“I admit, it does surprise me,” Spinelli agreed. “Because I know you, like, worship the ground her dainty little feet walk on and I always thought she was a pretty awesome mom but I figured you just got tired of Sam complaining about all the time you spent over there.”

“Sam doesn’t even–Elizabeth is the one that stopped letting me see Cady. If she hadn’t done that, I never would have had to file for joint custody.” Jason yanked his cell phone from his pocket. He’d call Elizabeth’s guard to find out where she was.

Spinelli frowned. Maybe Stone Cold was too upset to remember it, but when Former Goddess had filed the papers for him, he’d asked for complete custody.

10
Don’t you know I feel the darkness closing in
Tried to be more than mePort Charles Art Museum

Jason found her sitting in an empty room, surrounded works of art. She hadn’t taken her coat or scarf off, but sat motionlessly on a bench, staring into space.

Cady’s crying caught her attention and Elizabeth snapped her head up, her eyes wide and wary as Jason approached her, their daughter in his arms.

“What are you doing here?” she asked, fighting to keep from snatching Cady away. Her hungry eyes drank in every inch of Cady’s face, her hands, her little legs before looking at Jason. “Are you trying to drive me insane?”

“No,” Jason licked his lips nervously. “Spinelli–he was worried about you and–”

“And what?” she demanded shrilly, taking a step back. “You didn’t think taking Cameron and Cady away from me was enough? You kept me from filing an appeal and now you’re going to parade her in my face?”

Jason shook his head. “Elizabeth, I didn’t do any of that, I didn’t mean–”

“You think I’m stupid?” Elizabeth cried, tears streaming down her cheeks. “Why couldn’t it be enough to take Cady? To make me lose my entire family when everyone found out she was yours? Why did you have to take Cameron? Do you hate me that much?”

Cady, upset at her mother’s hysterical voice, started to scream her own protests. She held her hands out to her mother and started to wiggle.

“I don’t hate you at all,” Jason said, his mouth dry. He was having trouble keeping Cady still and in an act of desperation, he strode forward and almost shoved their daughter at her, hoping it would calm them both.

He had to find out why everyone was so positive that he had fixed the results of the custody hearing, why everyone would so readily believe he’d steal Elizabeth’s children out from under her and keep them away. His own mother believed he was blocking Elizabeth’s appeals–but Jason wasn’t even aware that she’d filed any.

Elizabeth clung to her little girl and pressed kisses to her cheeks, choking back her own sobs in an effort to calm Cady. “It’s okay, baby, Mommy’s here.”

“I didn’t pay anyone,” Jason said quietly. “I wouldn’t do that to you.”

“You filed for custody in the first place, after you promised me time and time again you would never take me to court.” Elizabeth closed her eyes and pressed her forehead against Cady’s, inhaling her scent, trying to etch it into her memory so that she could recall this later, alone in the lonely apartment.

“You didn’t leave me with much choice,” Jason replied, irritated. “You wouldn’t let me see her–”

Elizabeth rolled her eyes. “You’re such a liar, I can’t believe I thought I could trust you. I let you have all the access you wanted. You were over every day until you got sick of me and wanted me out of the picture–”

“I never wanted you out of the picture,” Jason interrupted harshly. “You wouldn’t let Sam pick her up–”

“You wanted to take her away me! You told Sam I was terrible mother, that I disgusted you!”

Jason closed his mouth abruptly and stared at the mother of his child, bewildered. “I never said that to you.”

“Not to me, you wouldn’t be that direct,” Elizabeth closed her eyes. “But you sent Sam to do your dirty work. You couldn’t even insult me to my face, you had to send her to do it.”

“I didn’t–” he protested.

“I don’t want to hear it.” Elizabeth kissed Cady once more before reluctantly giving her to Jason. “If it’s the last thing I do, I’ll get my children back.”

“Elizabeth–”

“And when I do get Cady back, the day I take her from you, I promise you, it will be the last time you see her.”

Elizabeth stalked out of the museum, her daughter’s cries echoing behind her.

1

No I would not sleep in this bed of lies
So toss me out and turn in…

November 26, 2007

Elizabeth Webber’s Apartment: Living Room

“This is one of the worst things I’ve ever had to see,” Robin Scorpio murmured to her boyfriend as they stood towards the back, watching their friend and co-worker struggling to keep her composure as she related information about her daughter to Sam McCall and Jason Morgan.

“I should rip his heart out,” Patrick Drake muttered. “He’s just lucky my hands are worth more than his trashy girlfriend.”

“She’s starting to sleep through the night,” Elizabeth said softly, cuddling five-month-old Cadence close to her, “but sometimes she wakes up–”

“Jason’s taken care of infants before,” Sam interrupted. She held her hands out. “Why don’t you just give her to me so we can get out of here?”

Robin narrowed her eyes and started forward but Patrick clamped a hand on her shoulder. “Don’t make this worse,” he cautioned her.

Elizabeth pressed her lips to her daughter’s head and rested her cheek against the soft downy blonde hair that was beginning to grow into curls. “Always remember that Mommy loves you, Cady,” she murmured, but she knew in a few months Cady wouldn’t remember her at all, much less that Elizabeth loved her with every breath in her body.

She carefully placed her daughter into Sam’s waiting arms and reached down to grab the diaper bag but Sam shook her head. “We don’t need that,” she said rudely. “Cady’s going to have everything brand new.” Her lips curled into a smug smile. “No hand me downs.”

Elizabeth’s hands tightened around the diaper bag that had seen better days, more important, days when Cady’s brother Cameron had still needed it. “It was Cameron’s,” she said softly, her voice breaking. “Can she at least take her dog?” Elizabeth unzipped the bag and withdrew a floppy ear brown stuffed dog that had been Cameron’s gift to his sister upon her birth that May. “It’s her favorite–”

“She won’t remember in a few days–” Sam began but Jason reached forward and took the dog from Elizabeth’s hands, not meeting her eyes.

“Is that everything?” he asked quietly.

“Yeah,” Elizabeth replied. She held out her hand, intending to touch Cady once more but Sam turned away and left, not even giving the heartbroken mother a chance to say goodbye one more time.

Jason hesitated and stared down at the dog in his hands. “I’m sorry about Cameron,” he said roughly. “I never thought–”

“You did your best to demonstrate that I was a terrible mother,” Elizabeth cut in harshly. “Did you really think any judge in their right mind would leave any child with me after what your lawyers brought out in court?” She folded her arms and looked away. “They took Cameron this morning and I’m not allowed visitation with him either.” For the first time since the horrible day Sam had come to her door a few months ago, her eyes met his. Shadows had dug deep circles under her eyes, anger lined her face and she looked much older than her twenty-six years. “You have what you wanted from me. Complete custody of our daughter and me out of her life. So get out.”

“Elizabeth, I didn’t–” Jason began.

But Patrick–who had sat through the custody hearing from start to finish and had tried to help Elizabeth on her fruitless search to find a lawyer willing to take on Jason Morgan–Patrick had had enough.

He strode forward and took the enforcer by the arm and shoved him back. “You took her kids from her, you son of a bitch. Are you trying to destroy what little dignity she has left? Get the hell out!”

There were not many times Jason Morgan, enforcer to Sonny Corinthos, would stand down to a neurosurgeon who he knew would never become physically violent but for whatever reason, Jason didn’t push the matter.

He left the apartment and the second the door clicked shut, Elizabeth’s knees gave out and she sank to the floor, sobbing. In the space of two hours, her children–the reason she woke up in the morning, the reason she drove herself to be better and to work hard–her children had been taken from her and she had no idea if she would ever hold them in her arms again.

2

And there’ll be no rest for these tired eyes
I’m marking it down to learning
I am

Limousine

Sam pressed her lips to Cady’s head and breathed in the fresh scent of baby powder. This was justice, she told herself. Three years ago this month, her daughter had been stolen from her and now she finally had one to take her place.

She glanced up to find Jason staring out the window, a blank expression on his face. She knew it troubled him that it had to be this way, that they’d had to sue for custody, that it had ended up taking Elizabeth’s remaining child from her but she knew it was better this way. If Jason and Elizabeth had had their way, Cady would be shuffled back and forth between them, never having a real permanent home and she would never accept Sam as her mother if Elizabeth were around.

Eventually, she would have lost Jason to Elizabeth. He would have been drawn to the mother of his child and Sam was still troubled by the fact that neither of them had ever expressed any real regret for their night together. They weren’t sorry and that meant it had been real between them.

She had sensed a threat to the life she wanted and she had neutralized it. It had been almost pathetically easy to play the parents against each other, planting herself as a sympathetic go between. She’d tell Jason that Elizabeth was being stubborn, that she refused to see Jason and furthermore, refused to discuss anything less than complete custody with no visitation from Jason.

And she’d tell Elizabeth that Jason was disgusted with her for keeping the truth from him for so long and forcing him to continue to keep the secret, that he wanted his daughter and was pursuing complete custody, despite Sam’s pleading to the contrary.

In the end, each had believed her and she’d been able to push Jason into fighting for his daughter in court–and the lawyers had pried out information about Elizabeth designed to make her look bad in court. They’d tugged a few pieces from Jason, but most they had found on their own.

It had been satisfying to sit in court and listen as Diane Miller had torn Elizabeth to shreds on the stand, finally exposing her and pushing her from that pedestal she’d been on for so many years. Sam felt vindicated and knew she had secured her place in Jason’s life for good.

“I wish there was something we could do about Cameron,” Sam sighed. “But the judge might overturn his ruling and we’d lose Cady.”

Jason glanced at her and Sam shifted, unnerved by the look in his eyes. “I wish she would have agreed to joint custody,” he said quietly. “I never wanted it to come to this.”

“I know,” Sam replied. “But Elizabeth wouldn’t budge and no one can blame you for fighting for your daughter. Everyone’s on your side. Emily, the Spencer family, the Quartermaines, Sonny and Carly–”

“Leaving Elizabeth with no one,” Jason said more to himself but Sam heard it and narrowed her eyes. He was weakening.

“She has Patrick and Robin,” Sam argued. “And I’m sure they’ll help her get custody of Cameron again. Jason, she didn’t leave you with much choice. She forced you to do this. I mean, didn’t you offer time and time again for joint custody?”

“Right.” But Sam could see Jason wasn’t convinced and she wasn’t entirely surprised. She was smart enough to know that even if Jason had stayed with her, part of him would always be in love with Elizabeth. Courtney had warned her that once–that neither of them had ever measured up and if Sam wanted a life with him, she’d have to be able to accept that. And she could. She didn’t need his whole heart, just the majority of it. But the small piece that would always belong to Elizabeth would keep Jason from believing the worst about her.

If Sam wanted to keep the current status quo, she’d have to work at it and make sure Elizabeth never got custody of her kids again.

3

Don’t think that I can take another empty moment
Don’t think that I can fake another hollow smile

General Hospital: Locker Room

“I should have taken the night off,” Robin said, pulling her lab coat on and securing her dark hair into a ponytail. “Elizabeth shouldn’t be alone–”

“I’ll stop by between surgeries tonight,” Patrick promised. “But she wanted us to leave, she needed to be alone.”

“She needed her family, her friends,” Robin muttered. “But those bastards–”

“Jason took Cady today?” a new voice demanded from the next row. A second later, Emily Quartermaine emerged, looking shocked. “He actually took her?”

“Did you think Sam would let him wait more than twenty-four hours?” Patrick replied. “She and Jason showed up not an hour after some bitch from Social Services carted Cameron away.”

Emily sank onto the bench. “This is just one big mistake,” she said softly. “Jason never wanted complete custody. He wanted to see her, to provide for her. And he would never take Cameron from her, no matter how stubborn she was being.”

“Wake up, Pollyanna,” Patrick snapped. “Your brother wanted that kid enough to scare any reputable lawyer away from this case. Alexis refused to take it on basis of conflict of interest and the only other lawyer who might have done it for cheap is Ric Lansing and I’d rather chew my leg off than let her go to that slime for help.” He looked to Robin. “We should have gone with our first instincts and hired someone from out of state, that wouldn’t have known to be scared of Jason Morgan.”

“What are you talking about?” Emily asked. “Jason wouldn’t do that to Elizabeth–”

“I would have agreed with you once,” Robin said quietly. “The man I knew would never have put the mother of his child through a custody battle like that. But I think we all know what drove Jason to this point.”

“How could Sam have possibly–” Emily began.

“Don’t be stupid. Sam’s been salivating for that kid since she found out it was Jason’s,” Patrick said, disgusted with the entire situation. “You would have been sick if you’d seen the way Sam hauled Cady out of the apartment this morning –” he paused. “Well, you wouldn’t have been.” He slammed the locker shut and hung his stethoscope around his neck. “You did take your brother’s side.”

“She was cutting him out of his daughter’s life,” Emily protested, but her once vehement protest had softened considerably. “He just wanted visitation rights–”

“You never showed up in court,” Patrick argued. “You have no idea what he wanted. You have no idea what those lawyers put her through–”

“I couldn’t take sides,” Emily said. “He’s my brother. She’s my best friend–”

“Save it.” Patrick slammed out of the locker room.

Robin sighed. “I’m sorry about him. He’s just–he’s not really used to giving a damn about other people so he’s not always very good at expressing himself.” She sat down on the bench and looked up at the girl she’d known for so long and shook her head. “Watching Elizabeth have to go through that twice…it’s not something I ever want to do again.”

“I know she feels I let her down,” Emily said. “And I guess…maybe I have.” She sat next to Robin. “I just…I didn’t know what to do, who to support. Jason is my brother, he’s my family and you know I have precious little of that left and I haven’t really agreed with a lot of the decisions Elizabeth has made–”

“I’m too tired to listen,” Robin interrupted. “I’m not interested in listening to you rationalize and explain why you couldn’t be bothered to even talk to your brother and plead on her behalf. She did it for you when Jason refused to speak to you after you got involved with Sonny. She begged with Jason to understand, to accept what he couldn’t change. And she supported you, when few others did. It’s a shame you had to prove you’re less of a friend.” Robin stood and left Emily alone in the locker room.

4

It’s not enough just to be lonely
Don’t think that I could take another talk about it

Elizabeth’s Apartment

For a few brief months, Cameron had shared a room with his baby sister. The small two-bedroom apartment had been all that Elizabeth could afford, but she’d given her children the larger of the two rooms.

That had been something else that Diane Miller had used against her. She had twisted the fact that a three month old girl and a four year old boy shared a room when the same practice was in use all over the country. She was not the only single mother whose children were forced to share a room, but unfortunately she was the only single mother whose daughter had a father like Jason.

She was ashamed to admit that it had never crossed her mind that Jason would do this to her, despite the hell she’d put him through the previous spring. She hadn’t blamed him when he’d stopped her wedding to Lucky and announced that he was the true father. She’d been secretly relieved that he’d taken that responsibility from her but Jason had clearly never forgiven her for first keeping the secret and then asking him to give up his child.

For a time it seemed like they were going to make it, that they were going to find a way to work together and bring their child up together, though they lived apart. Cadence Alana Morgan had been born in May and until August, it seemed like they had found a way to handle the situation. Jason had stopped by nearly every day to spend time with her and their family seemed to be accepting the situation–Emily had finally started speaking to her again.

Out of the blue, one morning in September, Sam had stopped by instead of Jason. She said that Jason was tired of coming to this tiny apartment every day and pretending to be okay with the situation, pretending that he wasn’t completely disgusted by Elizabeth and her actions. He wanted Cady to live with him.

In Elizabeth’s opinion, Cady was too young to spend much time away from her mother. She would be breastfeeding for at least another three months and maybe by Christmas, they could talk about an overnight visit.

She had misunderstood, Sam said coldly. Jason wanted Cady with him. He thought that Elizabeth was a terrible mother and wanted Cady away from her. Elizabeth had been stunned and she’d been devastated by that, but she hadn’t believed Sam initially. She’d sent the woman away and told herself that Sam had always resented the fact Elizabeth had given Jason the child Sam never could.

But Jason stopped visiting and in his place a set of legal papers filing for complete custody of Cadence Alana Morgan was delivered and finally, Elizabeth had accepted that there would be a custody hearing.

Naively, Elizabeth thought the judge would see through the weak arguments that she was an unfit mother and at worst, he would award joint custody. Even after Diane Miller ripped her to shreds on the stands and left her sobbing, she’d believed that no judge would give full custody to Jason Morgan, an alleged mobster over a hardworking nurse with strong ties to the community.

But she had underestimated the lengths Jason would go to and she was sure he had bribed the judge into giving him complete custody. Whether he had gone the extra mile and asked for Cameron to be taken away, she wasn’t sure, but she hadn’t lost Cady without a little back room dealing.

She stood in the doorway to her children’s bedroom and took in the small double bed that Cameron had been so excited to buy (“A big boy bed, Mommy!”) and crib with the frilly pink trim that Emily had bought for her baby shower (“All girls love pink”) to the mountains of stuffed animals that had been showered on each child by Cady’s godparents, Robin and Patrick.

She drank in each sight slowly before closing the door and walking away. She would never walk in that room again, Elizabeth vowed, unless she had one of her children to bring home.

5

Just like me you got needs
And they’re only a whisper away

December 1, 2007

Jason Morgan’s Penthouse

When Jason pulled his front door open that morning, the last person he had expected to see was Robin Scorpio. His ex-girlfriend had not spoken to him since he sued Elizabeth for visitation rights. There had been icy glares, of course but all words had come from her furious boyfriend. To find her standing there was a surprise, but he could guess it was not a friendly visit.

“I want to see Cady,” Robin announced. “She’s my goddaughter and she loves me and I want to see her.”

Jason hesitated but nodded. At the very least, he was sure Elizabeth would want an update on her daughter and he was willing to do what it took to get them through this situation. He had been upset to learn that she was not budging on joint custody, that she had refused all of Sam’s overtures. He had never wanted it to be like this, had never wanted to take Elizabeth’s daughter from her but he had a right to his child and for whatever reason, Elizabeth had chosen to ignore that.

“She’s in the nursery,” Jason said, stepping aside. He closed the door after Robin strode in and led her to the upstairs room that Sam had decorated for Cady.

Cady was crying–as she had been nearly every day for the past five days. He had hoped she would have adjusted to the situation by now but she continued to cry. Robin made a cooing sound and lifted her out of the crib. “Here now, it’s Aunt Robin.” She patted Cady’s back and Jason was irritated when the infant slowed her crying to a whimper. “That’s right, honey bear.” She eyed Jason over Cady’s shoulder. “You have her on formula, I bet.”

“The doctor said it would be okay,” Jason said, shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “She’s six months old.”

“Hmm.” She continued to rub Cady’s back in small circles. “It’s okay, Cady. You’re just missing your mommy.”

Jason exhaled slowly and turned his eyes towards the window. “Elizabeth didn’t really give me much choice, you know. I didn’t want it this way–”

“Save it,” Robin interrupted. “I don’t give a damn about anyone’s excuses anymore. Yours for putting Elizabeth through this, Emily’s for abandoning Elizabeth and Audrey’s for still not speaking to Elizabeth simply because you turned out to be the father.” She kept her voice and light breezy so she wouldn’t disturb Cady, who had finally stopped whimpering.

“What was I supposed to do?” Jason demanded. “Just let her take Cady?”

“You’re a hypocrite,” Robin replied. “You treated AJ like the dirt under your finger tips simply because he had the nerve to want to see his own son. You kept the truth from him, you helped Sonny and Carly keep Michael from him and if you don’t think that didn’t drive AJ to the edge, you’re an idiot.” She set Cady back in her crib and made sure her stuffed dog–the one toy from her familiar room–next to her. “But the second you don’t think you’re being given all the access you want to your own child, you pull out all the stops and dirty tricks to take her from her mother.” She met Jason’s eyes. “How does that make you any different than the Quartermaines?”

“That’s–” Jason swallowed. “That’s not how this was,” he said. “Michael was different–”

“Why?” Robin demanded. “If Elizabeth had gone to Lucky and told him the truth from the outset, and asked him to claim Cady because she didn’t want her child around you and Lucky agreed, how would that have been any different than what you and Carly did?” she retorted. “The rights of the mother above all else, right?”

Jason remained silent, unable to find the flaw in that argument. It would not have been different and he was ashamed to know that. He looked at his daughter and drank in the delicate features that were nearly a direct copy of her mother’s. Her nose, her eyes, her mouth. She was going to grow up to be as beautiful as her mother.

“Is she okay?” he asked quietly.

“Don’t pretend you care,” Robin replied.

“She hasn’t filed an appeal yet,” he continued. “I thought she’d at least file an injunction–”

“She can’t–” she said shortly. She huffed. “There’s no money left. Her last lawyer cleaned her out, no one will loan her any money and even if I thought she’d accept it, all my resources and Patrick’s are tied up in the house. We won’t have anything until after the escrow.” She stepped away from the crib and left the room. Jason followed after a moment.

“I’m going to be coming by weekly, after I’m sure Sam is gone,” Robin said as she walked down the steps. “Elizabeth deserves to know how Cady is and if you’re going to be a bastard about it…” she shrugged. “I’ll call my father. He’s already offered to help Elizabeth and the kids disappear.”

Jason stopped short. “What?”

Robin turned, one foot on the last step. “He hates men bullying women, you should know that and he hates you to begin with.”

“I don’t want it to be like this,” Jason called after her.

Robin stopped at the door and looked back at him. ” You cut off communication with Elizabeth, you took her to court and you bribed the judges–”

“I didn’t–”

“–you made your bed, Jason. Now you have to lie in it.”

She slammed the door behind her, and somewhere above him, Cady started to cry again.