October 5, 2018

Since Mad World ended up being an insanely intricate story, I didn’t think that I should put it all on one page at Crimson Glass. Like Damaged and Hand Me Down, I wanted some room to spread out.

Mad World is going to have three separate books published over the next year or two. The first, Break Me Down, will be published starting October 8, 2018 and concluding sometime in December. I will be posting two chapters a week.

Book 2, as yet untitled, should be out sometime in 2019. I had initially planned to post the first two books back to back, but it’s taking longer than I thought to write Book 2, and it may not be ready until January or February.

Book 3, also untitled, will not be published until later in 2019 or early 2020. (Let’s just stop and consider the fact that we’re here right now. How did we get almost to 2019 already? Lord.)

See you guys on October 8 for the first two chapters!

October 3, 2018

Here we are. Almost two and a half years after I started this journey with all of you, my fourth full-length novel, Bittersweet has had its final chapters posted.

Chapter Thirty-Three & Epilogue

There’s a long author’s note on the epilogue that hopefully answers some questions you might have after it’s over.

If you’ve been reading all along and maybe you’re not someone who replies to every chapter, I would love to hear from you guys on this ending. I had so much fun writing this!

Thanks already to those who have voted in the NaNoWriMo poll. It looks like the 1999/2000 stories are in the lead so far which I’m excited about. I really haven’t dipped my toe into that particular period so this will be a great experience. If you haven’t voted yet, make sure you do before October 7. 

If one of the stories you’re looking forward to didn’t make the cut, don’t worry. All of the stories I put up for consideration are stories I will be writing at some point. My hope is that this being my last graduate semester for reading 500 pages a week and writing tons of papers, I will be able to go back to writing 90 minutes a day which I could do this summer. If I could write that often, you’d be getting a lot more content more often.

I’ll be back on Monday with Chapters 1 & 2 of Mad World. I AM SO FREAKING EXCITED FOR YOU GUYS TO READ THIS!!!

October 1, 2018

All right, first things first: Bittersweet, Chapter Thirty-Two is now live. I hope you guys like it! The final chapter and epilogue will be posted on Wednesday.

Second, the problem I’ve been having with posts publishing to social media and email is most likely resolved, at least I think so. We’ll see going forward.

Third, it’s time for the final NaNoWriMo poll! I’ve written sample chapters/scenes for the top four choices and you guys will be selecting your top choice. I had fun writing the samples so I’m looking forward to writing whatever you guys vote for 🙂

Choices

Signs of Life
Set in December 1999. When Nikolas Cassadine announces to most of the town that Jason Morgan and Elizabeth Webber are sleeping together, there are a lot of interested parties including both their families, the PCPD, and the gangsters who nearly killed Jason only weeks earlier.

First Chapter

Counting Stars
Set in April 2000. Jason Morgan left town abruptly in January, leaving Elizabeth Webber behind to pick up the pieces. When she needs him to return, he mysteriously vanishes. Is he avoiding her or is something more nefarious going on?

First Two Scenes

For the Broken Girl
Set in April 2006. When Manny Ruiz begins working at General Hospital, Elizabeth Webber begins to report his activities to Jason Morgan, reviving their buried friendship. This sets them, and everyone they love, on a collision course that will destroy Elizabeth’s life.

First Chapter

Life For Rent
Set in August 2006 & sequel to Choose Your Moment. After the Port Charles blackout, citizens of Port Charles to start to pick up the pieces of that night, only to learn that their lives have been irrevocably changed by a scandal at ELQ and a batch of failed condoms.

First Chapter

This poll will be open until October 7, 2018 at 8 PM EST.

NaNoWrimo: November 2018

  • Counting Stars (45%, 30 Votes)
  • Signs of Life (23%, 15 Votes)
  • For the Broken Girl (23%, 15 Votes)
  • Life for Rent (9%, 6 Votes)

Total Voters: 66

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For the Broken Girl is set in 2006. The prologue begins in September, and then Chapter One jumps back to April. It’s mostly a rewrite of the Lucky drug story because while I mostly liked it, I think there are things that could have been done differently.

It picks the show up at the end of March and pretty much everything that happened on the show until then has happened with a few differences.

Lucky’s story after the train crash is being rewritten, so just forget everything you know about that. The first chapter sets up most the big differences and the rest will be filled in at some other point.

I can’t remember exactly when Manny started at the hospital as a janitor–if it was before or after the virus, but in this story it’s after.

Sonny and Emily’s relationship has only just been discovered.


Prologue

September 2006

Port Charles Police Department: Squad Room

Dawn was breaking over the streets of Port Charles as a weary Alexis Davis weaved past the sparsely populated desks towards the small, narrow hallway that led to the administrative offices. There were few officers on duty this early, and those present were somber, quiet.

No names had been released to the press or through dispatch, but bad news had a way of spreading in Port Charles, and this…this had hit some of them really hard.

Alexis stifled a yawn as she pushed open the door to Mac Scorpio’s office, finding the commissioner seated at his conference table, staring down at a white mug of coffee. In front of him sat a tape recorder.

Alexis set her briefcase on the table across from him and took a seat. “I’m sorry it took so long to come in. The girls have a cold. Krissy brought it home from daycare.” She gestured at the recorder. “You have the tape, then?”

“Yeah.” Mac dragged a hand over his face. Stubble lined his cheeks, and his eyes were rimmed with red, lines of exhaustion etched into his features. His day had begun at five o’clock the previous morning and he was unsure if he would even be able to sleep if he laid his head down on the pillow.

“How—” She cleared her throat. “How bad is it?”

“I’m not sure it gets any worse than this,” Mac admitted. “I’ve been in this business a long time, and I—” He gently touched the recorder. “I’m not sure I’ve ever heard anything like this.”

“Okay.” Alexis managed a deep breath. “Let’s hear it.”

“911, what’s your emergency?”

Chapter One

 If you forget the way to go
And lose where you came from
If no one is standing beside you
Be still and know I am
Be still and know that I’m with you
Be Still, The Fray


Thursday, March 30, 2006

Elm Street Pier

 Elizabeth Spencer hesitated at the top of the stairs when she found Jason Morgan seated at one of the benches that looked out over the harbor. When they had first become friends seven years earlier, they had met often on this pier, but it had been more than a year since she and Jason had shared even a casual conversation.

She was unsurprised to find her old friend sitting in quiet thought. It was a chilly night, and the icy wind blowing in from the lake dropped the temperature in the air another ten degrees down near the water. She wrapped the edges of her cardigan more tightly around her torso and started down the steps.

Jason turned slightly at the sound of her footfalls and got to his feet. “Elizabeth.”

“Hey.” She stopped in front of him and offered a half smile. “I bet your day was pretty awful.”

He exhaled slowly and looked away, out over the dark waters of Lake Ontario. His hair was longer than she’d seen it in a while, still brushed into those spikes that seemed as much a part of him as his leather jacket and jeans. His hands were shoved into the pockets of that jacket now.

“You saw the papers.”

“I didn’t, actually,” Elizabeth said. The Port Charles Sun was out of her budget at the moment—she pinched every penny to keep her two-year-old son in daycare. “Emily called me crying this morning about the press, Sonny, and how awful you were being.” She sighed.

“Yeah.” He pressed his lips together in a thin line. “Did you know?”

“Did I know?” she repeated. “That Sonny and Emily were having an affair and checking into hotels under assumed names?” Elizabeth considered this question. “I knew Em had some feelings for him, but I don’t think I would have guessed Sonny felt even a little bit the same way.” She chewed on her bottom lip. “I knew something was going on with Em, but—no, I didn’t know exactly what.”

Jason said nothing to his ramble, so Elizabeth continued, “Emily said you were really angry. That you…told her she had to stop seeing Sonny.”

“I did.” Jason met her eyes, and she blinked at the defiant anger in them—as if he expected her to argue, to defend Emily or Sonny.

Elizabeth sighed and sat on the bench, unwinding the strap of her oversize canvas bag and setting it in her lap. “See, that’s when I knew something was wrong.”

He frowned at her, sat down. “What do you mean?”

“That’s not like you—telling people what to do. Making ultimatums. You hated Lucky all those years ago—and he gave you a reason to—but I don’t think you never came out and told me to leave him.”

“I should have,” he muttered. “I know it all worked out and you…” He squinted at her. “You’re happy, aren’t you?”

“Happy is an interesting word.” Elizabeth pursed her lips. She didn’t want to talk about her marriage and how her life with Lucky Spencer was not exactly what she’d had in mind. “For you to tell Emily she had to stop—I knew you had your reasons. I told Emily that, too.”

Some of the tension left his shoulders, and he visibly relaxed. “I thought you’d take her side.”

“I don’t know if there are sides to be taken.” She chewed on her bottom lip. “Is it…the danger? Like you used to tell me? I know you…you’ve changed your mind since then. I mean, Courtney and Sam—” She stared down at her hands, her short nails bitten almost to the quick. “But maybe since it’s Em—”

“I was wrong back then,” he said simply, but neither of them looked at one another now. “I took your choice from you. Lied to you. I tried to do better later. It’s not the danger. Emily’s not an idiot. She knows what we do. It’s—” He hesitated. “Sonny is my best friend, but I’m not blind to who he is. How he treats women.”

“Ah. I thought—” Elizabeth nodded. “I thought it might be something like that. Well, you’re the one Sonny sent to tell Brenda when he stood her up at the altar, and God knows, you’ve been there for Carly and Sam. I guess you know what you’re talking about.”

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw his face turn towards her, but she kept her eyes straight ahead, finding the lights of Wyndemere in the night. “You…agree with me.”

“Let’s just say that I see both sides. You know who Sonny is better than anyone in the world. I believe that. I also—”

She waited a moment, trying to gather the courage to say the next part—to try and explain Emily’s point of view without giving away too much. The way Emily had spoken this morning, the way Jason had been surprised at her support—was anyone listening to Jason? Was Carly or Sam?

“I know what it’s like to love someone that the entire world sees as a threat to you. As someone who will hurt you, who isn’t good enough for you.” She glanced at him and saw that he understood what she meant. “It was like hearing my own life played back for me this morning when Emily called. No one understands Sonny like she does. I don’t know how he is when they’re together—”

“So, you think I’m wrong.”

“No, I don’t.” Elizabeth hesitated. “The thing is, Jason, she’s right, too. She probably does know a side of Sonny that you don’t. And I don’t think that giving her ultimatums is what’s going to work.” She managed a half smile. “There’s a reason Emily and I are friends, you know. When someone tells us we can’t have something, we usually just double down.”

“Yeah, I remember.” He was quiet for a minute. “So, are you going to tell me to let it run its course? Let Sonny get bored and move on?”

“Is that what everyone else says?” Elizabeth asked. “Carly?”

“And Sam,” he admitted.

And outside of Emily, those were the most important women in Jason’s life, so it must be hard for him to feel alone in this.

“I honestly don’t know what you should do,” Elizabeth told him. “Because even though I agree that Emily is right, that doesn’t mean you’re not. And letting it play out—it just means Emily is going to get hurt later rather than now. Either way, she gets hurt. I don’t think we can stop that from happening. Because I’ll be honest—I’ve known Sonny for a long time, and I don’t think Emily—I don’t think it’s soul mate territory. She’s not Carly or Brenda. I don’t know what drew them together, but I doubt it’s lasting.”

“You do think I should stop fighting it.”

She thought about her answer for a long time, thought about just taking his side so that he didn’t stand alone. She hated the idea of him being on his own in this—against everyone he loved. But she owed him the truth.

“I think that ultimatums aren’t going to work,” she said finally. “Because I know what those are like.” She met his eyes. “When I resisted and pushed back, it meant cutting people out. And when I tried to give in, I made myself miserable.”

“Do you—” His voice was a bit lower now, a bit rougher. They both knew exactly what she was talking about even if she wasn’t being specific. “Are you sorry?”

“Not for a minute.” She smiled at him. “Even though I hate how it ended—that it never really went anywhere—I know that the decision to end it wasn’t someone else’s. It was mine. I might wish…things had been different. But I made my choices. And that matters. I’m sorry, Jason. I wish—I wish like hell I could tell you that you’re right. That demanding it end now is the right decision—”

“But you don’t think it is.”

“I don’t think telling her or him to stop it is going to work, but I do agree that it would be better for everyone if it were over sooner rather than later. Emily’s looking for someone who can love her, and as much I like Sonny, it’s not him. Not the way she needs.”

Her cell phone rang, and she dug it out of her bag. She stared down at the caller ID with a grimace. “It’s Lucky. I’m late getting home.”

“He must be worried.” Jason stood, and she followed suit, hitting ignore on the call and shoving it back into her bag.

More like it was Cameron’s bed time and Lucky was tired of watching her son. He probably wanted to go to bed so he could get up early for his next rehab session. She wasn’t interested in having that argument with Jason looking on.

“I should get going.” She slid the bag’s strap back over her shoulder. “Emily knows you love her, Jason. You’ve done what you can.”

“Thanks for…” He trailed off. “Thanks,” he repeated.

Friday, March 31, 2006

General Hospital: Locker Room

Elizabeth stifled a yawn as she shoved her bag into her locker and sat on the bench to unlace her sneakers. Once she had arrived home the night before, Lucky had yelled at her for twenty minutes before storming out. She had then discovered exactly why he’d been so anxious for her to get home.

Cameron had a stomach virus and spent most of the night either throwing up or—making Elizabeth wish she hadn’t potty trained him so well because diapers meant she might have managed more sleep. As it was, Lucky had had to reschedule his rehab session for this morning because Cameron couldn’t go to daycare, and they couldn’t afford to lose Elizabeth’s pay for the day. She’d already used all her sick days caring for Lucky at the beginning of the year.

Rescheduling physical therapy meant it would be even longer before Lucky could return to active duty at the PCPD. He hadn’t been on the job, not really, since the train crash earlier that November.

Elizabeth was sure that as soon as Lucky was back on full duty and full pay, he would be…better. He’d stop resenting her, her son—he’d be less angry. They had had such a bright future, such shining optimism once, and she was desperate to cling to that dream. To give that life to her son.

The door to the locker room slammed open, the heavy wooden door crashing against the plaster wall with a THUD. Elizabeth closed her eyes. She had a sixth sense for when her day was about to get worse, and all those senses were tingling now.

“You know, there are times I really don’t understand my brother,” Emily Bowen-Quartermaine declared as she dropped her bag on the bench next to Elizabeth. “He is literally the worst right now.”

“I don’t think that’s fair,” Elizabeth said wearily.

“Oh, God, can we go back to when you hated Jason? Because I don’t think I can take you being his cheerleader right now.” Emily yanked open her locker. “I stopped by his place this morning hoping he had calmed down.”

Elizabeth grimaced. “What happened?”

“Oh, he started by being nice to me. Saying he understood that I cared about Sonny, and that he wasn’t trying to make choices for me, but then he starts telling me Sonny is just going to hurt me, and Sam was trying to make him just see that it’s none of his business.”

Which meant Jason had been ganged up on by his sister and fiancée. Fantastic. That had probably made everything better.

“How’d you leave it?” Elizabeth asked when Emily didn’t continue. “You’re pissed, so something must have happened.”

“I—” Emily bit her lip, looked at Elizabeth with guilty eyes. “I told him that he has to find something better to do with his life than constantly being up Sonny’s ass. It was one thing to screw his ex-girlfriend, but—”

“Emily.”

“What? It’s like Jason is obsessed with Sonny, and I just don’t get it. I mean, they’ve basically all been with the same women or related to them—except for you.” Emily grimaced. “I might have…also not used the word girlfriend.”

“I bet you’re really popular with Sam now.”

“Well, I don’t really like her so that’s not a loss, but yeah, Jason wasn’t thrilled when I called his fiancée a whore.”

Elizabeth squeezed her eyes shut, prayed for strength. Clearly, Jason had tried to take her advice, but Emily wasn’t interested in even giving Jason a slight break. “Em, Jason isn’t obsessed with Sonny. They’re best friends—”

“Please. How do you explain all the crossover?”

“It’s…” She pursed her lips. “Weird, I know. But Jason already knew Robin, and Courtney—well, he was helping her. And he was helping Sam. Carly—Carly doesn’t make any sense. And you know that Brenda and Jason knew each other—”

“Great, you’re Jason’s cheerleader. I thought you were my best friend.” Emily scowled, yanked off her sweater and reached for her scrub top. “Can’t you just pick a side and stick with it, or are you still obsessed with my brother?”

Elizabeth exhaled softly. “You know, Cameron’s sick.”

“What?” Emily blinked at her.

“I found your brother sitting on the pier last night, and I spent ten minutes talking to him about this. I told him to stop giving you ultimatums because it wouldn’t make it better. And then I went home where Lucky screamed at me for being late and stormed out, leaving me to take care of Cameron who was up all night with a stomach virus. I’ve slept maybe an hour at best, and now I have to pull a double shift because Lucky’s on half pay.”

“Elizabeth—”

“But you don’t ask about me. You don’t care about anyone but yourself. You stormed over to your brother’s apartment, screaming at him, calling the woman he loves a whore, and you somehow think you’re the victim here?”

Elizabeth tugged her scrub top over her head and got to her feet. “You knew he’d be upset about Sonny, and you lied to everyone for weeks about sleeping with him. You saw Brenda crumble into a nervous breakdown after Sonny was done with her. Carly had a nervous breakdown and went crazy trying to stab you—and you think Jason’s crazy for thinking maybe Sonny is not the best romantic bet?”

Emily’s mouth opened then closed.

“So, if what you really want to know is if I agree with Jason about Sonny being a really bad road for you travel—then, yeah, I do. I think you know it, too. But you’re going to do whatever the hell you want. You always do.”

She slammed her locker shut and stormed towards the door. She yanked it open and then stopped dead in her tracks. She just stared at the man calmly squeezing the excess water out of his mop across the hall and slammed the door shut, ducking back into the room.

Emily stared at her. “What’s wrong?”

“M-Manny Ruiz.” Elizabeth swallowed hard, pressed her hand to her chest, a closed fist over her heart. “Across the hall. Mopping.”

“Are you kidding me? There’s no way he got hired here.” Emily reached for her phone and then stared at it. “You’re going to have to call Jason.”

Elizabeth frowned at her. “Why don’t you call Sonny?”

“I—” Emily tilted her head. “I don’t know. Jason—he just always handles these things, I guess. But he’s not going to pick up if it’s me. He’ll answer you—”

“I got a new phone number last year, I don’t think he has it. And you know he doesn’t answer calls from people he doesn’t know—” Elizabeth fished her phone out anyway. “But I’m not leaving this room until I know what’s going on.” She hesitated. “I don’t have Jason’s new number either.”

“Oh, God, the two of you.” Emily rolled her eyes and read the number out to her as Elizabeth dialed. “Don’t tell him where you got it. He’ll just have another reason to yell at me.”

Elizabeth ignored her as the phone rang. Her heart was pounding so hard she could hear it thudding in her ears.

“Hello?” Jason’s voice was cautious, unsure.

“It’s Elizabeth. Um, this is my new number. Emily gave me yours—Ow—” Elizabeth shoved Emily in the shoulder after her best friend kicked in her the shins. “What are you, five?”

“You didn’t have to tell him—”

“Elizabeth, is everything okay?”

“Manny Ruiz is here. At the hospital. Mopping like he’s some sort of janitor. I don’t know if they hired him or what, but I just— I saw him and I kind of panicked.” She bit her nails, wincing as her teeth hit skin.

“Okay.” There was something on his side of the phone—she could hear Sam’s voice demanding if it was Emily, and if it was, then Jason needed to hang up and take her side of things. “Wait a second—are you somewhere safe?”

“We’re in the locker room.”

“Okay. Sam—stop it!” There was more muttering, then she heard a door closing. “I’m on my way there now. I’ll find out what’s going on. Stay there. If you can.”

“Thanks.” She hung up the phone and sat back on the bench. “What if the hospital actually hired him, Em?”

“What if Alexis and Ric are wrong about the tumor?” Their fight forgotten, the friends exchanged uneasy glances and waited to hear from Jason.

Counting Stars is set in January 2000, a version of what might have happened on the show after Jason left but if Lucky hadn’t come back.

For the most part, everything that happened up until Jason left that year has happened except Carly did not become pregnant with Sonny’s kid. It’s just a complication I have no use for in this story. I don’t particularly remember exactly what Luke and Laura were up to this at this point, but they’re still separated.

These are the first two scenes in the first chapter — I wasn’t able to finish the full four scenes I had planned in time but this gives you the gist of where the story is sort of going.


Friday, January 21, 2000

Harborview Towers: Jason’s Penthouse

Jason Morgan had never really moved into the apartment across the hall from Sonny Corinthos—it had been vacant after their lawyer Justus Ward had abruptly resigned earlier that year and moved to Philadelphia, and Jason had wanted out of the cottage he had shared with Michael and Robin.

The only furniture in the house was what Justus had left behind—a sofa, some desks, and a bed in the master bedroom.

There was very little of Jason in this penthouse, and that would make it easier for him to leave it behind when he left Port Charles later today.

But first…he had to do something else.

He zipped the last of the clothes he planned to take with him into a duffel bag and set it on the carpeted floor next to the closet, then turned back to the bed.

Nestled beneath the snowy white sheets and dark comforter lay a sleeping woman. She was sleeping on her side, one hand tucked underneath the pillow, chestnut curls spilling over her bare shoulder.

He didn’t want to leave her. Not after the last few weeks, not after last night. Carly had left him no choice. The longer he stayed in Port Charles, the more she’d try to use him. And anyone else he cared about.

Elizabeth Webber murmured something and then turned over to her other side, the comforter sliding down slightly, revealing her bare back.

“Oh, man,” Jason muttered, scrubbing his hands over his face. He could understand why some people just left a note and took off.

But Elizabeth trusted him—and he would never hurt her like that. He didn’t want to hurt her at all, but…

Jason sat on the edge of the bed, tucked her hair behind her ears, letting his fingertips slide down her cheek. She smiled, her eyes still closed. “Hey.”

“Hey.”

Elizabeth opened her eyes, still blurry from sleep. But then her gaze sharpened, those dark blue eyes trained on him.  She sat up, clutching the sheets to her chest, blinking. “You—you’re dressed—” Biting her lip, she sat back against the headboard. “Do you have to leave?”

“I—” Jason dipped his head. “Yeah.”

“Sonny is sending—”

“My plans haven’t—” He swallowed the lump in his throat. “I told you yesterday—”

“No, no. You—” She licked her lips, readjusted the sheet as a bright red flush crawled down from her cheeks to her shoulders. She met his eyes. “You changed your mind. Didn’t you?” She looked around the room. “I mean—”

“I’m sorry. I wish things could be different—”

“Don’t—” Elizabeth closed her eyes. “Don’t say that. Don’t pretend. If you wanted things to be different, they would be.”

He dipped his head, looked away. “I—”

“I need to get dressed. Can you please—” She gestured at the door. “I’m not—I’m not doing this when you’re dressed and I’m not. It’s just—I’m not doing it.”

“Okay.” He pushed himself to his feet and stopped by the door to lift his duffel bag. “Elizabeth—”

“Please just go.”

Downstairs, he set the bag down on the sofa and exhaled slowly. He never should have let last night happen. He knew he had to leave, but she’d been upset yesterday and he hadn’t wanted to leave her that way. He’d taken her on one last ride—

He wasn’t sure how he waited for her. Her footsteps on the carpeted stairs were soft, and he nearly missed them. Jason turned to see her, dressed again in the jeans and sweater she’d been wearing the night before, her curls pulled away from her face which had been washed.

Elizabeth stopped at the bottom of the stairs, her face pale as she spoke. “I spent the last ten minutes trying to remember exactly what made me think I had changed your mind about leaving, and I realize now there was nothing. Beyond the fact that you kissed me. You brought me here. And you had sex with me.”

Jason swallowed hard. “It wasn’t—” He bit back the protest that it hadn’t been the way she made it sound. “It wasn’t just sex-”

“Clearly it was—” She shook her head. “I’m tired. You obviously feel you need to go and I’m not enough to make you stay—”

“It’s not you,” he cut in, his voice rough. “If I could—if it were just you and me, I’d never—” He shook his head.

“Can you call me a cab or something?” she asked. She crossed to the desk where her jacket had been tossed over the back of the tall leather chair.

“I’ll take you—”

“You need to go, right?” She pulled her hair out from the collar of the jacket. “I don’t want to hold you up.”

“Elizabeth—I don’t want it to be like this—” He stepped towards her, but she shook her head, sharply.

“You decided it had to be like this. You could have left me yesterday. You could just left. But you—” Her voice broke. “Do you know what it took for me to trust you like that? To be with you—you knew I’d never been with—not since—” She bit her lip. “So I don’t know what you expected when you woke up and packed your bags while I was still—”

His skin felt like it was stretched too tightly over his bones. “I can get someone to drive you home. I just—I need to go. It’s not you—”

“Stop—just stop. Don’t explain yourself. You will never be able to explain how you could sleep with me and leave the next morning without making it worse. If I ever meant even a little to you, then you will just stop.”

“You know—” Jason didn’t go on because he could see how hard she was fighting to keep the tears at bay, and he’d done enough. “I’ll get someone to drive you home.”

He started for the door, then stopped. Without turning back to face her, Jason spoke quietly. “I was being selfish last night because I knew when I was gone, you’d find someone who deserved you. I don’t.”

“Jason—”

He closed the door behind him and pulled out his cell phone to call one of the guys in the parking garage to give Elizabeth a ride.

Wednesday, April 5, 2000

 

Corinthos Penthouse: Living Room

Max Giambetti knocked lightly on the door, then pushed it open. “Hey, Mr. C, you got a minute?”

Sonny Corinthos, standing at the window looking out over the city, turned with a mug of coffee in his hand. “Yeah, sure. What’s up?”

“Elizabeth Webber wants to talk to you.” Max opened the door all the way so that the petite brunette could enter the penthouse. “Always nice to see you.”

“You, too.” Elizabeth waited until the guard closed the door before turning a guarded expression to Sonny. “I’m sorry to just show up.”

“It’s not a problem.” Sonny studied her for a long moment. He hadn’t seen her much in the two months or so since Jason had left Port Charles. He felt partially responsible for his hasty exit and had avoided Kelly’s, but he’d sent flowers when Audrey Hardy had unexpectedly passed away in her sleep in February. “How have you been?”

“Okay. I guess. Um, I meant to call you. Thank you for the tulips.” She swallowed hard. “It was nice of you.”

“I told you,” Sonny said, pressing his free hand to his chest. “Anything you ever need.”

“Well…” She chewed on her bottom lip. “Have you…is Jason in touch with you?”

“Uh…” he squinted at her. “To a certain extent. He—he hasn’t contacted you since he left?”

“Sort of.” She reached into the large canvas tote she had over her arm. “He’s sent me a few postcards, but there’s never a return address.” She held up. “Or anything at all really. We, um, didn’t leave things on good terms.”

“I’m sorry to hear that. Do you need something from him? He calls in every once in a while—twice since he left, but I never really know when—”

“Yeah, I—” Elizabeth sighed. “God, this is so hard. Why couldn’t he be normal and just have a damn cell phone or a way to—” She shoved the postcards back in her bag. “The next time he calls in, just tell him I need to talk to him—”

“Hey, wait a minute—” Sonny held out a hand to stop her from leaving. “Just wait. Can I help with something?  I can track him down if you need—”

When Elizabeth just shook her head, folded her arms, he sighed. “Elizabeth, please. I feel like it’s my fault he’s gone. If you need help—”

“Look, it’s just—don’t go chasing after him. I don’t want him to come back because—” She paused. “I just wanted to tell him that I’m…I’m pregnant.”

Sonny stared at her for a long moment, his mouth slightly open. He had known Elizabeth for a little over a year, considered her someone he cared about—but that—that he hadn’t seen coming.

“Pregnant,” Sonny repeated. “Are—um—okay. So—” He exhaled in a rush of breath. “I didn’t realize—not that it’s any of my business—”

Elizabeth stared down at the ground. “It was just—it was a mistake. He left anyway. I don’t want him to come back because—I mean, I know that sound stupid because of course he’ll come back once I tell him, but I guess…I was hoping he’d come back without knowing.” She managed a half smile. “But it’s been about, oh, eleven weeks, and I’m pretty sure I can’t keep this secret forever.”

“Yeah, yeah—” Eleven weeks. Almost three months. Christ. “No, I get it. Um, so you don’t want me to run him down but—”

“Just ask him to actually call me the next time you talked to him, I guess.” She cleared her throat. “Thanks—”

“Do you need anything? Um, are you still in that studio?”

“Oh. No, no. I couldn’t—” She offered him a smile. “I found out for sure that I was—well—when I knew for sure, I knew I had to move. I promise. It’s much better. I’ve got everything I need. I got some money from my grandmother and I’m looking for a job with better hours.”

Sonny didn’t want to let her walk out the door, but she was already halfway there and he didn’t know what else he could do.

“Thanks, Sonny. I’ll—I’ll keep in touch, if you want.” She opened the door, then turned back to him. “Don’t—don’t say anything to anyone else. I haven’t really figured out what…I’m telling people yet.”

“Yeah, yeah, sure. You tell me if you need anything, okay?” Sonny followed into the hallway and watched as she stepped onto the elevator. When the doors had closed, he let out a rush of breath. “Do me a favor, Max. Can you get our best guy to look after her?”

“Sure, Mr. C. Everything okay with her?”

“That depends on your definition of okay.”