I spoke to you in cautious tones
You answered me with no pretense
And still I feel I said too much
My silence is my self defense

---

June 21, 2006

Scorpio-Jones House: Front Porch

Felicia Scorpio-Jones opened the door and found Robin standing on the porch, hugging herself and looking like she’d lost her puppy. “What’s wrong?” she demanded, always fiercely maternal towards this girl she’d watched grow into a woman.

Robin smiled faintly. “Is Uncle Mac here?”

“No, he’s at the station–” Felicia put a hand on Robin’s arm and gently pulled her into the house–Robin was too tired to resist. “Honey, you know I don’t like being kept in the dark. What’s going on?”

“I just…I need to talk to…” Robin closed her eyes. “I’m pregnant.”

Felicia’s hands dropped to her side and she frowned at Robin. “Come again?”

“I’m pregnant, I’m going to have a baby,” Robin clarified. “I need–I have to tell Uncle Mac.”

“Right, of course. You’re going to sit down first and you’re going to let me feed you because you look like a brisk wind is going to sweep you away.” Felicia steered Robin into the kitchen where she directed Robin to sit down. “Now, I want to know everything because I have a feeling you’ll need back up when you tell Mac.”

Robin nodded and rubbed her arms. She felt so cold. “Well, there’s not much to tell. When Patrick and I were together, we slept together once.” She flushed. “Well, I only spent the night at his place once but well we didn’t–it was more than once–”

Felicia coughed delicately. “Yes, I believe I get the picture.”

“We used protection and I thought–” she swallowed hard. “I don’t know what happened, you know I’m careful. I’m anal about this stuff, Felicia.”

“Of course honey.” Felicia set a plate of dried fruit and crackers in front of Robin. “Eat.”

Robin chewed on a piece of apple just to make Felicia happy but didn’t even register the taste as it slid down her throat. “Anyway, I thought we were moving too fast and I didn’t…I pulled back and it didn’t happen again. And then we had that stupid fight–” Tears blotted her vision and Robin swiped angrily at her eyes. “I’m so tired of crying.”

“Well, your hormones are going to be acting up for a while so I’d get used to that,” Felicia said sympathetically.

“And I haven’t even really talked to him since about anything more than a patient or a consult. I was feeling sick and tired so I thought maybe something was wrong with me–that maybe my T cell level was changing so I asked Alan to run some tests and…I found out this morning that I’m pregnant. And I could have infected Patrick.”

“Oh, honey…” Felicia sat back. “Are you going to tell him?”

“I already did,” Robin admitted softly. “I went straight from Alan’s office to find him. I mean…I know what’s going to happen and I know how he feels about children and commitment but…I just…he had to know–if only to get tested.”

“Of course,” Felicia sighed and rubbed her mouth. “And what happened when you told him?”

“He said he couldn’t handle this right now, that he needed some time to process but I know how he really feels. He hates me, Felicia and he probably has every reason too, especially now since I might have infected him–”

“Honey, honey–Patrick has a lot of flaws.” Felicia paused. “And I mean, a lot of flaws. But I honestly don’t believe for one second he’d ever blame you. He’s a doctor, he went into this relationship with open eyes and open ears and he knew all the risks. I know you know in your heart that he wouldn’t hate for you for it.”

“He never wanted kids,” Robin said. She sniffled and wiped her eyes with the napkin Felicia had given her. “He’s said it a thousand times–he doesn’t want a family, he didn’t want to be tied down and I told him that I didn’t need for him to do anything, that I wasn’t going to ask for him. I know he’s not going to want the baby–”

“Hold it, did he say that?” Felicia asked.

“No, but come on, Felicia.” Robin closed her eyes. “I’m not going to let myself hope for a miraculous happy ending to this scenario, there isn’t one. I’m having a baby–one that I might have already infected with the virus and I’m going to raise it alone. That’s reality and anything is else is just a fantasy.”

“No matter what happens with Patrick,” Felicia reached out and took Robin’s hand in hers. “You are not alone and you will never be alone, is that understood?”

“Yeah.” Robin sniffled again. “Can you call Uncle Mac and ask him to come home?”

“Sure.” Felicia patted Robin’s arm and stood.

General Hospital: On Call Room

Patrick flopped onto the bunk and rolled onto his back to stare at the fabric of the bunk on top of him.

He’d had two surgeries and a consult since the encounter with Robin in the locker room and had been running on auto since the elevator doors had closed. He’d had to shut himself off and concentrating on getting from one moment to the next.

But now–when he had a moment to himself–he found himself going back to that moment–with Robin looking up him, terrified and Patrick not having anything to say that would make things better.

Pregnant. She was pregnant and quite clearly didn’t expect him to step up and didn’t intend to demand it. No, that wouldn’t be her style. She wouldn’t beg or grovel for him to help–to be a father. She might be disappointed that he wouldn’t, but she’d never ask him to do something like that. And a year ago–with a different woman and in a different place, that might have happened and Robin would be correct.

But things were different now and he wasn’t that guy anymore and he wanted to take that look out of her eyes and surprise her with being exactly what she needed. The only trouble was that Patrick had never been able to correctly gleam what Robin needed or even wanted and he didn’t think that would magically start happening now that the situation had turned critical.

The on call room door slid open and Noah Drake stepped in. He closed the door behind him and leaned against it. “Elizabeth Spencer said that she saw you come in here like something awful had happened. She was concerned.”

Patrick chuckled, the sound was bitter and almost harsh. “I don’t know that it’s awful but it’s certainly something all right.”

“I know I’m not going to win any Father of the Year awards any time soon but I’d like to help if something’s bothering you,” Noah remarked.

Patrick sighed and swung himself into a seated position. He kept his head low, his arms dangling over his knees. “Yeah, sure. You can’t make things any worse than they already are.”

“You’re probably wrong about that but I suppose we could give it a try.” Noah crossed his arms. “So what’s up?”

“Robin came to see me in the locker room,” Patrick said. “We haven’t spoken about anything more than patients in the last six weeks so I tried to brush her off, tried to dismiss her.”

Noah frowned. “It wasn’t about a patient?”

“No.” Patrick scrubbed his hands over his face. “She said that she’d just been to see Alan Quartermaine, that he’d run some tests…”

Noah straightened. “She’s sick?” he demanded. “Is it serious?”

“About as serious as it gets,” Patrick sighed. “She’s pregnant, Dad.”

The chart in Noah’s arms slid to the ground with a clatter. “You–” he cleared his throat. “With a baby?” He shook his head. “Strike that. How–Patrick–how could this happen?”

“Before you ask, of course we were careful,” Patrick replied. He stood and paced the tiny room. “I’ve never met someone who was more anal about safe sex than Robin. But you know, the only thing that’s one hundred percent is abstinence.”

“Of course.” Noah exhaled slowly. “She must be out of her mind right now. Worried about the baby, worried about you. Where is she?”

“I don’t know,” Patrick shrugged helplessly. “She just told me that she was pregnant, that I need to be tested and that she wasn’t asking for me for anything. And then she left. I couldn’t catch up with her.” He rested his forehead against the wall. “She thinks I’m this deadbeat loser that can’t even take care of my responsibilities.”

“I’m sure her opinion isn’t that bad,” Noah murmured. “Patrick…what are you going to do?”

“I’ve never made it a secret that I didn’t plan on kids, on a family.” Patrick shook his head. “I know where Robin would have got the idea that I wouldn’t step up because I’ve all but told her that a thousand times in all the months we’ve known each other. But…it’s a reality now and I can’t…I’m going to be a father. I can’t keep thinking about how I didn’t want this to be my life, that’s not fair to anyone. Especially to a kid.” He dragged his fingers through his hair, making it stand even more up on end. “I’m going to do exactly what you and Mom would expect me to do, the right thing.”

“Uh huh,” Noah nodded. “Which would be?”

“I’m going to convince Robin to marry me and we’re going to raise our child.” Patrick met Noah’s eyes. “What else can I do?”

Scorpio-Jones House: Living Room

When Mac burst through the front door a mere ten minutes after Felicia had asked for him to come home immediately, he found Felicia seated nervously on the sofa and his niece at the fireplace, staring at a photo of herself with her parents, taken shortly before their supposed “deaths”.

“What’s wrong?” Mac demanded. “What’s going on?”

“Uncle Mac…” Robin sighed. “You must have broke every speed limit getting here.”

“I’m the commissioner. I just put the lights on,” Mac said. “Robin…” his eyes flicked to Felicia before moving back to his niece. “Is…are you okay?”

“I’m okay as I’m going to be,” Robin said honestly. “Uncle Mac, you should probably sit down.”

Mac crossed his arms and squared his shoulders. “I’m fine where I am. Are you in trouble? Do I need to call Robert or Anna?”

“You still think I’m eleven,” Robin sighed with a sad smile. “You know how much I love that about you, Uncle Mac? That no matter where I go, how much I change or what I do, you’re always going to see me as a little girl in pigtails that needs your protection.”

“Before I was worried, now you’re scaring me. Robin…”

“I’m pregnant, Uncle Mac,” Robin said. She twisted her fingers together and her smile grew just a little. “I’m going to have a baby.”

“I changed my mind,” Mac said after a long moment. “I’m going to sit down.”

“It’s wonderful news,” Felicia nodded. “We’ll celebrate it, of course. I’ll get Luke to rent us the Haunted Star because I’m not setting foot at the Metro Court.”

“Of course it’s good news,” Mac said. “But Robin…there are questions I want to ask but I’m not sure how to.”

“Then let me just answer them for you.” Robin kneeled in front of her uncle and took her hands in his. “Yes, Patrick is the father and yes, there is a chance that he was infected. Yes, I’ve told him. And no, I don’t know what comes next.”

Mac’s eyes narrowed. “If he thinks he’s just going to get off without taking any responsibility…”

“He doesn’t,” Felicia jumped in over Robin’s small sound of protest. “Your niece has her mind up how Dr. Drake is going to handle this situation and isn’t allowing for any other scenario. I imagine Robin gave him all of five seconds to process things before walking out.”

“Well…that’s true,” Robin admitted. “But–Uncle Mac, I don’t know what Patrick’s going to want or going to do but I’m not…I won’t force his hand, okay? I don’t want him to do anything he doesn’t want to do because it’ll just make him resent me and our baby. Please tell me you understand.”

“I don’t like it, but it’s not my life.” Mac leaned forward and kissed Robin’s forehead. “Whatever you need, sweetheart. You know I’ll do whatever you need me to do.”

“Good.” Robin stood and slid her hands into the back pockets of her slacks. “Because I need you to call my dad and ask him to come for a visit. And I don’t want you to tell him why, okay?”

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